Humble Hero of Isshu

Ah, hello. I, um... my name is Touya. It's nice to meet you. ~Residing in Hotel Unova

[formerplasmaking]

That sudden outburst had probably earned N a few strange looks, perhaps even more than that. Usually, he wasn’t the type of person to draw attention to himself, but did he really care right now? ..No. Too shocked to say anything else, or even move, he just stood there. Completely frozen. He certainly surprised himself with that, and obviously Touya too since he only managed to say one small thing.

Silence dragged on.. N began to worry again. His arms and shoulders started trembling quite visibly. Never before had he allowed his anger to show as much as that. Anger that could have been prevented if he hadn’t let himself get so upset.

Suddenly, N felt his wrist grabbed and him being pulled along. Fist, he thought it might be one of the waitresses escorting him out because of the noise, until he noticed.. It was Touya. Who knows what he thought of N after that.

They arrived back at the hotel shortly after, but Touya didn’t stop. Instead, he went straight to his room, and shut the door. N had a vague idea what that could have meant. Direct confrontation. No escape, no way to avoid whatever questions were asked, no changing the topic. Neither of them said anything. The silence was almost painful. However, N decided to change this. “I..” One word is all he could manage before rubbing his eyes. “P-Please.. Forgive me.”

[tou-ya-blog]

That made Touya's heart twinge guiltily.

"...Don't."

Taking a deep, steadying breath, Touya slowly turned to face N.  He wasn't ready for the sight that met him, though.  N rubbing at tear-soaked eyes, still trembling noticeably-- that small voice he had spoken in moments before ran though Touya's head again.  It hurt.  He knew he cared about N, but it hurt so much more than he thought it would to see the other boy in such a state.  To Touya, N was something extraordinary, someone who had the will to stand up against the entire world and its long-established views, even if Touya himself didn't wholly agree with it.  Someone who cared about every Pokemon in the world.  Someone who even had people revere him as a king...

"I really..." Touya faltered, scratching the back of his head uneasily.  "I'm not... good at this sort of thing.  I'm really bad at handling so much emotion, and I'm sorry I've snapped at you.  It's not how I wanted to reunite at all.  You're..." Nervousness made him hesitate again, but he quickly shook it off and looked directly up at N.  "You're really important to me.  N.  I really..."

Touya stepped forward, closing the distance between them to rest his forehead against the other's chest, not caring that his hat got bumped off to the floor.

[formerplasmaking]

Everything went downhill within a few split seconds. Initially, Touya was the only one upset, but now.. Why did he have such a big problem with N leaving? What was so wrong about it? At this point, N’s anger was rapidly rising. That added on top of the previous emotion didn’t help. This isn’t going to be a pretty sight. Listening to the other made it worse. Did he realize it, or was he too upset to even notice? Is this is what emotional pain caused by a friend felt like? It hurt.. More than he’d like to admit.

Despite all that, N still listened, but those words.. He couldn’t stand much more. A strange feeling tugged at his heart. It almost seemed like it could burst any minute now. All the while, still staring at the table, trying his best to prevent an outburst. Looks like it’s about to fail. But, what exactly was that feeling? ..So unfamiliar. Given the current discussion, it was difficult to tell. Tears were forming in the corners of his eyes. Hopefully, he’d be able to keep himself under control so Touya wouldn’t see them. The problem would be wiping them away and finding an excuse for it. Better think of something quick.

As much as he disliked admitting it, Touya was right. They could be friends once Plasma were defeated. Yet, N still chose to leave. It made him question his reasons for doing so. He had to get better somehow, didn’t he? If he stayed, someone could have helped him. To be more specific, Touya could have helped him, but he hadn’t thought of that at the time.

Not noticing or caring that the waitress was standing right there at that moment that the other paused.. N finally cracked. He got out of his seat and slammed his hands down onto the table, the tears from before now streaming down his face. “To you, I’m what!?” He practically yelled everything at Touya from this point. His state of mind was now all over the place. “You know, I thought what I left for was a perfectly good reason! But, now.. I’m questioning everything! Don’t you see I wanted you to be happy!? I wanted you and your Pokémon to be happy.. Together! Is that not good enough for you!?”

[tou-ya-blog]

The sudden slam on the table made Touya jump, head snapping up to look at N, who was now standing.  His eyes only widened further when he noticed the other boy was crying.

That knocked his temper back a good dozen paces.  Never had he seen N so riled, upset enough to cry.

"I..."

He had to look away.  Seeing N hurt like that, knowing that he caused it, made his chest ache too much.  When his eyes met empty floor next to them, Touya realized the waitress must have been startled off by the outburst.  Coming to such a public place was probably a mistake; of course it would take more than one small talk for all of emotions two years had built up to be taken care of.  Even if it was silly, Touya had sort of been wishing it would have been.

Without a word, Touya reached out, grabbed N's wrist, and lead him out of the cafe, tugging him hastily along back in the direction of the hotel.  He didn't slow down or spare a glance for even a second until they made it back to his room, shutting the rest of the world out behind his door.  Unsure of where to go from there, though-- where to start-- Touya simply stayed with his back to N, silently staring down at the door handle.

[formerplasmaking]

The situation soon became awkward and it caused N to worry. He had no idea what to say in case it had been taken the wrong way. The last thing he wanted was that. It was quiet between the two of them for a short few minutes.

N sighed rather loudly, not meaning to, of course. In fact, he didn’t realize just how loud. Not exactly how he planned to spend his time catching up with the other. And the shrug he received beforehand wasn’t a good kind of shrug. He didn’t know if he wanted to stay or make an excuse to leave.

Finally, the silence was broken. “I wanted to keep a low profile so you could have some peace and accomplish your goals. Was it really that bad not having me in the same region as you?” As he became more upset, his hands curled into fists. “I did what was best for myself, for Unova, for everyone.. For you.”

You could say N felt like he wanted to cry, but he couldn’t do that. Not in public. Especially not in front of Touya.

[tou-ya-blog]

Touya's eyes flashed as his gaze swept over to glare across at the other.  Not a harsh glare, but one with emotion burning behind it.  "I don't know what's best for you... I definitely don't know something like what's best for Unova, either...  But don't you dare say-- don't you even think for a second-- that you leaving me behind is what's best for me!" He managed not to shout this time, but it was clearly said harder and a slight bit above normal speaking level.

Don't you get it?  Don't you understand?  Touya's hands clenched into fists, the trembling from restraint barely noticeable, but there.

"Plasma was finally stopped.  We could finally really be friends.  And yet you..." He struggled for words, not having his emotions in such a mess in longer than he could remember.  "I was never much of a goal setter.  Something like League Champion seemed more like a far-fetched dream to me.  But after what happened... I did set a goal.  The first goal I ever chased, what I truly wanted above anything else, was to find you again."

I couldn't say anything back then.  I was shocked.  I was confused.

"Don't you get it?  To me, you're--"

A waitress chose then to come along, giving Touya long enough pause to realize what he'd been embarrassingly about to blurt out.  Subdued, Touya lowered his head and quietly ordered a peach flavoured tea.

[formerplasmaking]

‘Average person’? That’s not true at all. Touya was more than just an average person to N. It’s saddening that he didn’t see it that way, and it caused N to frown quite a bit.

Noticing the other looking at him, he thought for a moment that the one question he didn’t want to answer would pop up. Surprisingly, it didn’t.. Perhaps later instead. If that was the case, he’d be prepared to answer. Touya would find out eventually if he happened to run into that trainer. Speaking of Reshiram, had he kept Zekrom? ..Yes, he must have. It’s not like him to let something like that go, especially if it grew a strong bond with him like his other Pokémon had.

Well, here it is. The café. It was a little on the.. Pink side. N didn’t mind too much though. He followed Touya to a small table and sat in the seat opposite to the other before staring out of the window.

“…!” Another question. Still, it was expected. They hadn’t seen each other for a long time. N looked down at the table. “Nothing interesting. Reshiram and I travelled. We didn’t stop very often, unless we needed to eat and rest, of course. I’m not even sure where we went. I guess I should have paid more attention.”

[tou-ya-blog]

"Hnnn~..."  Touya hummed noncommittally, tilting his head to rest his chin in his hand and stare out the window as well.

It wasn't as if Touya could say much in the way of names of places he went during those years, either, but that wasn't what had suddenly gotten to him enough to shrug on a slight cold shoulder to the other boy.

"And so even when you had nothing major to speak of going on that whole time, you still wouldn't send me a single word?"  You wouldn't take me with you?

Not meaningless.  Touya almost snorted outwardly.  Did N even understand how what he said just now made Touya feel?

[formerplasmaking]

The title of champion and hero is embarrassing? How strange. Anyone else would be thrilled, but then again, Touya was different to anyone N had met.. That’s probably why he liked the boy.

He slowed down so he could walk beside the other, looking down at him. “Why is it embarrassing..?” N shook his head and stared in front. What was going through Touya’s mind? What happened two years ago, perhaps? Something else? N doubted he’d find out any time soon.

“Do I.. Ah! No. I..” How to explain this. He didn’t want to talk about it, really. “I told it to leave. It was unwilling to, but I explained that it was for the best.”

[tou-ya-blog]

"Because I'm just an average person..." Touya mumbled in protest, eyes fixated on the ground while he tried to will the persisting light blush away.

The news about Reshiram caught his attention, though, drawing his gaze up and over to N.  He wanted to ask why, especially if the dragon had been reluctant to go, but he figured it had to do with his morals against keeping Pokemon in Pokeballs, and it wasn't exactly convenient to have something that huge following you around.  It made him feel just a little guilty about still having Zekrom with him, but the other half of the dragon duo seemed to have its own reasons for wanting to stay, and so he had let it be.

At least they had arrived now, and he didn't have to bring it up.

The place was a little more pink than he was ready for, but he supposed that was to be expected, seeing as how it had an Audino theme.  It looked to be a seat yourself and wait to be served, so Touya did just that, choosing a small table for two by the window.

"What about you?" Touya asked once N followed suit, eyeing the other curiously.  "What were you doing for those two years?"  And why turn up here of all places?  The unspoken question hung silently in the air.

[formerplasmaking]

“True.. I didn’t really have a choice though. Well, I probably I did, but..” This is difficult to explain. Especially since Touya won’t accept any excuses. “I guess I just needed some time alone after everything that happened?” As if that’s good enough. Not exactly the best excuse out of the multiple that N had previously thrown out.

Subject change. Perfect timing since he had nothing else to say about his disappearance. “Oh? Do you not like being a hero then? It seems like a fitting title for you, as does champion. You’re a very talented trainer! ..Even though I still don’t agree with the whole idea of it.” Nope. Although he accepted it, N still didn’t like the idea of Pokémon being stuffed away into Poké Balls. “Hm? Oh, right! Of course! It must look odd, us just.. Standing here.” And with that, N began to walk, making sure Touya followed behind him.

[tou-ya-blog]

Touya's cheeks tinted automatically at the titles, still not used to hearing them in referral to him one bit-- especially from someone like N, who Touya thought was far more remarkable than himself.

"L... like I said, they're embarrassing."

He started walking when N did, content to let him lead.  Taking the lead himself and having N out of his sight wasn't the most appealing; Touya absently wondered how long it would take to get over the nagging paranoia that the other boy was suddenly going to vanish again.

"Do you... still have Reshiram?" He asked abruptly, trying to fill the small space of time it would take to make it over to the cafe.

[formerplasmaking]

Definitely a bad idea. This situation could either get worse or better, he hoped for the latter, but nothing is that simple. As if he didn’t feel bad enough already. Now he just felt stupid. He didn’t want to say anything else just yet in case the results added to the problem.

Hm? An apology? ..Out of nowhere? Well, this was just a bit confusing. Had Touya’s mood changed already? And so quickly too. “I.. Understand.” Hold on. What.. Was that? Looking for N? And he left his friends and mother behind? But, he just practically scolded N for that.. More confusion. “I thought you stayed here? Why would you go running off like that?” Stop. Think. Notice something wrong here? This conversation is just going around in a circle.

N shook his head. “Thank you.. I think we should catch up! I mean, it has been a long time.. But, I’m afraid I’m not sure where to start. I’d like to hear about what you’ve been up to though..”

[tou-ya-blog]

The question made him look off to the side, scratching his cheek with one finger distractedly.  "Well... because you left so suddenly..."  He turned back.  "As if I would just accept that!" Touya mumbled stubbornly with a huffy look that almost reached a pout.

Now that the serious talk-- or in his case, overly emotional shouting-- was done with, Touya raised his arms and settled them behind his head in a relaxed gesture. "What I've been up to, huh...?  Aside from looking for you, not a whole lot, I guess.  Mostly kept out of cities.  People praising me as a hero or a champion or both was embarrassing..." Touya trailed off, lowering one arm so he could point in the general direction of the one thing he knew about this place so far, since he noticed it on his way in.  "It's kinda weird to just stand here talking.  Why not sit and have something in that cafe?"

[formerplasmaking]

What’s this? A reach and a grip of the sleeve? Was it something he said to cause the other to do this? And then it hit him. Why did he even bother speaking? A lot of it came across the wrong way. ”T-Touya? It’s okay.. I’m not leaving again..” Nope. This isn’t working. Complete and utter failure with words. Stop trying.

“R-Right! We did.. I’m sorry. I should have sent a letter. I never really gave it a thought.” Way to to make the other feel better. Here comes that stupid feeling they call guilt. Not exactly what he needed right now.

Silence. No. That’s not good for either of them. Say something, anything, just so long as it’s not stupid. “..Can we put this behind us and move on, please? I really didn’t mean to upset you.” Bad idea. Stupid question. Why would Touya let this go when he’s obviously more than a little upset about it? It doesn’t work that way.

[tou-ya-blog]

"Put it behind us...?"

Touya's grip faltered just a little, but his instincts didn't dare allow him to let go completely.  "Idiot!  That's not something you just--!" he halted mid-sentence, gaze suddenly dropping to the floor guiltily.  N didn't understand; he wasn't used to people.  And here Touya was getting upset at him as if he were an average person who knew better.

"I'm sorry.  I... lost control.  It's not your fault you don't understand," he murmured, subdued enough now that he let his hand drop back to his side.  "I don't know what you were doing these past two years, N, but for me... it's not something I can just let go.  I was looking for you all that time.  I left Cheren and Bel behind.  I hardly gave a word to my mother.  I..."  Was no better than N had been, really.  Closing his eyes, Touya took a deep breath.  After slowly letting it back out again, he let his gaze trail back up to the other boy.

"I finally found you.  N.  Welcome back."

[formerplasmaking]

Another sigh, this time accompanied by a frown. “Please, calm down.. It’s not like you to get so upset.”

When he thought about it, he probably deserved everything that was being thrown at him, and whatever else might come after that. But then, he hadn’t expected his departure to have such an impact on someone. Especially this boy. Touya had real friends, N didn’t.. Only his Pokémon.

“I explained already.. I had no other choice. It’s not as if I was going to leave forever. This is my home.. I couldn’t completely abandon it, even if I had been forced. I’ll always return, whether it be by my own choice, or someone else’s.” So much for this being easy. No. Instead, it was more difficult than he had originally thought it would be. With no idea how to comfort people, how was he supposed to deal with this?

[tou-ya-blog]

Gripped by the sudden irrational fear that N was going to vanish again, Touya reached out and grabbed onto the other's sleeve.  He might not have meant he was going to leave again at some point by his words, but that's still how it made Touya feel.  Even if they knew very little about each other, N was right; it wasn't like him to get upset like this-- but that didn't change the fact that right now, he was.

"Don't you dare leave like that again!  Don't you leave me behind!"

"We became friends, didn't we?  You don't just leave friends like that!"  Hypocrisy, really, considering that's exactly what Touya had done to Cheren and Bel when he suddenly went off in search of N, but...

[formerplasmaking]

’S… Stupid!’

That voice. It was so familiar.. Almost too familiar. It could only be one person. Him. Why is he so upset? Sure, N left, but he had a reason to. Didn’t Touya understand that? There were certain things to be thought about and reconsidered. “It’s.. Good to see you too.”

The other ran over to him, glaring and not surprisingly, still yelling. N sighed. “..You have to understand how I felt at the time. I know how I left everything, but I had no other choice. I just.. I had to do it. And no, you weren’t meaningless at all. You helped me realize a lot of things. I thank you for that. Please, try to see it from my point of view..” That might work, then again, it might not. Worth a try either way. One could only hope it would be enough.

[tou-ya-blog]

There it was.  That voice, and that ridiculously fast talking.  The next breath he took hitched and he was helpless to stop those tears from spilling now.

'I wasn't ready for you to just leave like that,' 'I didn't want you to go,' 'I've been searching all this time.'  The selfish words were stuck in his throat, leaving him unable to do anything but shake his head in childish refusal to accept what he was being told.

"Dummy," he choked out, wiping at his face now.  Redundant, but that's all that would come out.

"If I'm not meaningless, then why did you go?  Not a single word for two whole years.  I don't get you..."  But then, Touya had never really had the time to try properly understanding the other boy.  Back then, stopping Plasma was top priority.

[tou-ya-blog]

formerplasmaking started following you

Was it seriously...  Was this really it?  Two years of searching, two years of nothing but tireless searching and the moment he decided to give himself a break, to let up some of the weariness that had started to take him, fate just suddenly decided to hand him what he had been looking for?

"...."

"S... stupid!" Touya shouted it across the courtyard, for once uncaring of what attention it might draw to himself.  It startled a flock of Pidove into the air.  The few brave ones that had stood their ground fluttered away as well when he set into a run toward the one his eyes had locked onto and didn't dare stray from one bit.

It really wasn't that far, but the brief sprint and overwhelming torrent of emotions suddenly rushing through him left Touya breathless by the time he reached the tall boy, glaring up at him.  "Suddenly vanishing like that... not saying anything, not sending a single word...!  Stupid!  In the end, was I really that meaningless to you?!"  He had never been one to raise his voice, and yelling like that was probably causing a scene, but Touya couldn't help it.  His emotions were in full control now, stronger than he had ever felt before in his life.  He could even feel the beginning of tears prickling at the corners of his eyes.

[rippedredjeans-deactivated20131]

Cheren nodded, then turned a very, very light shade of pink. When the brunette looked away, he placed a hand on Touya’s shoulder with a sheepish smile. “Thank you, Touya. Some people are just…misinformed, I suppose. But I suppose as long as the people who matter to me understand, that’s counts the most.”

[tou-ya-blog]

The touch on his shoulder brushed away any ice two years had formed, instantly bringing back the warm memories of friendship.

"Of course!  I really am glad to see you've done well for yourself."  Unlike himself.

"Hey, it's been so long; why don't we do something together?"  Do what, he wasn't entirely sure at the moment.  As of yet he hadn't quite had the chance to look around.  But it was a hotel, and a nice one at that!  There had to be plenty of stuff to do.

[rippedredjeans-deactivated20131]

“Oh. Right. Of course you’re busy, I’m sorry…” he scratched the back of his head and sighed, then nodded. “Yeah, I just…well it seems a lot of people look down on the first gym leaders for some reason.” he shrugged, the offered a quick smile. “But don’t feel bad, really! We all get busy.”

[tou-ya-blog]

It probably never should have been so time-consuming, but he didn't say as much.

"...Huh?  Look down on?"

Were people really so blind as to put level above other far more important aspects?  The lessons each taught?  "But the first gym is everyone's first step toward all their hopes and dreams!  Without a first gym to point them in the right direction, what hope for the rest is there?"  Touya paused and looked the other way.  He hadn't meant to go on a speech or anything...  "I think it's amazing you were given such a responsibility."

[rippedredjeans-deactivated20131]

“Touya.”

“Why don’t you ever call me anymore? Am I no longer worthy of your friendship now that I’m a first gym leader? Am I no longer cool in your eyes?”

[tou-ya-blog]

"I was just... busy."  Had it been so long?  It was all muddled together.  "It's not like that, though!  I think it's amazing that you became a gym leader."  When?  Wasn't even around to say congratulations, huh...  "It's honourable, right?  Getting to help new trainers take the first step toward their dreams.  Just like us back then."

[rippedredjeans-deactivated20131]

“New autoplay.”

[tou-ya-blog]

“……………”

“Che.. Cheren…”

[rippedredjeans-deactivated20131]

“I need to get some, put my body in them, then I can rule the world.”

[tou-ya-blog]

"......."

Nope. No. Better to leave with no comment.

[rippedredjeans-deactivated20131]

“New autoplay.”

[tou-ya-blog]

"..............."

"Che.. Cheren..."

[tou-ya-blog]

WHAT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER WHEN YOU ARE IN A BAD MOOD?

"Just being with my Pokemon is usually enough."

"--When it's not, I like to stare at water.  Oceans, lakes, rivers, what ever I happen to come across."