I've been away so long, I forgot how we even did things on this blog. We had a so-called 'format', but oh well.
Just looked back at our first posts, how excited we were about college and uni and the whole life ahead. HOHOHO I FOUND THIS.
Shman:
Oh and I also decided to apply for matriculation instead of A-levels cuz there is NO WAY i’m gonna spend 2 YEARS on A-levels. NEVER.
OH YEAH? SO MUCH FOR THAT ALRIGHT.
After a year and 3 1/2 months in college, I think the excitement we had for college has kind of died down. We didn't really know what it was we were getting into, heh. We didn't expect it to be all fun and games, we KNEW we would have to work hard, but I think the both of us didn't expect A-Levels to be THIS hard. Or maybe it's just that the both of us kind of slacked during the first semester (I really have to stop being in denial. Yeah, we slacked.) And it was that slacking that robbed us of Cambridge. That was so disappointing.
It's just a few more weeks before college life comes to an end. Truth be told, I'll be happy to see the end of it. But as of now, I'm feeling a little sad as well. It certainly does feel as though this college experience hasn't been what I expected. Though, I'm not even sure of what it is I actually expected from college. Maybe more experiences? I can't put my finger on it.
20 more days to A2. To the most important exam I'll ever take, so far at least. To the exam that will determine if I make it to UK. To Leicester, to be specific. (mmhmmm, I got accepted into Leicester.) I'm worried that I might not make it in, then all my effort and hard work will just go to waste. I REALLY, REALLY want to go. So worried.
And then there's the feeling of dread. What if I don't fit in? What if UK isn't the right place for me? What if I get so homesick that I want to come home? What if I give up on medicine halfway? So many doubts. But deep down, DEEEEEEEEEP DOWN, when I'm not feeling so crappy, I KNOW that UK is the place for me.
Speaking of homesickness, I'm already beginning to feel how it's going to be like. It doesn't help that my parents are being EXTRA NICE to me now. I HAVEN'T EVEN GOTTEN SCOLDED FOR 2 WEEKS NOW. SOMETHING IS VERY VERY WRONG. Not just that, my parents have been making comments about how things will be like when I'm no longer here. Quite depressing.
And yet, I'm extremely extremely extremely excited. Shman is being DRASTICALLY supportive, spazzing over the long-awaited 'airport scene', as we call it. Spazzing about me being there in about 5 months. Spazzing about this and that and this and that. Too bad he'll only join me there in a year -.- It would've been so fun to spaz about stepping on UK soil and all the other stuff that we used to spaz about doing together. (So many red lines popping up now because of the word spaz. I don't think it's a valid word, heheheh.) And he seems so sure that I WILL be there, that he even has me convinced at times.
I cannot wait to be in Leicester. I can't wait to be studying something that I love. I can't wait to meet new people. Can't wait for all the new experiences that Leicester guarantees.
Dang it, I think too much.
Jeremiah 29:11, Jas. Jeremiah 29:11.
I just realized that this post doesn't have a point. I don't know why I'm even here, actually.
It's 1am now, and I'm supposed to complete Chap O PYQ before I head to bed. Greaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat.
Good night, lovelies.
xoxoxo,
Jas.
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