Operator Sickness || ꜱᴢᴇɴᴠᴇʀꜱᴇ
ᴅɪᴠɪᴅᴇʀꜱ ꜰʀᴏᴍ ᴘɪɴᴛᴇʀᴇꜱᴛ: 1, 2
ᴛʀɪɢɢᴇʀ/ᴄᴏɴᴛᴇɴᴛ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: Blood, sickness, hallucinations, abuse, mentions of starvation and kidnapping.
Ask me questions about Szenverse’s lore, world and characters if you want to :P
Part of being a proxy is the Operator/Slender Sickness. All of the proxies, and even some long-term victims, get it. Mostly, it goes person to person. Very rarely does He inflict it on people.
The first phase begins with coughing and paranoia. Most interpret it as a cold at first and stay home for a day or two. This isolation tends to make it worse. You get the constant urge to look over your shoulder or out the window.
Chances are, you aren’t actually being watched. If you caught it and didn’t immediately get kidnapped by the proxies, you most likely got it by accident. The proxies are picky about who can join them, but they’ll be forced to take accidentals in after a while.
The latter half of the first phase is where the bleeding starts. In between the saliva, you can taste your own blood. Cough a bit too hard, whatever is in front of you is suddenly red. This is when the accidentals go to the doctor and begin to receive treatment, which never fully works.
In the second phase, the bleeding slows to a near stop. You don’t taste it as much, and the coughing isn’t as often. You’re building immunity. Congrats. That wasn’t even the worst part! The experienced proxies call it the demo.
You begin to think you lost your appetite. The hunger eventually overwhelms you, and the feeling quickly becomes fond. It starts to feel good. No wonder it's called Slender Sickness!
When you start eating again, you might see a finger, eyeball, or hair mixed in your food. Random movements in the corner of your eyes, tall freaks standing next to trees… don’t worry, it's only hallucinations. As for the Operator symbols you keep seeing, those are probably real.
Hallucinations and nightmares are best friends, y’know. That tall guy you keep seeing while awake? He followed you into the dream world.
When you wake up, it’ll be hard to stand. Your vision will go blurry. You’ll want to vomit the pain away and forget everything. On the topic of forgetting, what was your life like before you got sick?
The third phase is the most painful. It’ll feel like knives are sticking out of your skin, and your bones are crushed into shards. The bed or couch will be the most comfortable place to stay, or maybe the woods.
If you have a menstrual cycle, it has either stopped or become very irregular by now. This might be an upside to you; it might not.
There’s one true pro to this entire fiasco of a sickness. You’ll notice nature more. The leaves, flowers, and grass will make you ignore everything happening to you. Being surrounded by it, like in the forest, is amazing. You might have new friends who understand you. The proxies would’ve noticed you by now, and they’ll be waiting.
You probably haven’t talked to your old friends and family for days now. Communication — such a difficult thing. How could you have ever responded to anything you’ve ever been told? The proxies just tell you things and don’t expect you to talk back. They really do understand you more than those fakes ever have.
After months of this sickness, it suddenly goes away. Your arms and legs don’t ache, you don’t cough, and the hallucinations and nightmares halt. The problem is, you’re in a new bed.
The proxies don’t like letting their recruits go until their training is finished.
As the months pass of being at the Mansion, you realize you’re faster and stronger. If you once had a period, it's become more regular and has mostly synced with the other proxies like you. You’re not sure how. Period syncing isn’t an actual thing — just a myth. What a strange disease…
You see the tall man sometimes, still. And the nightmares have come back. Your roommates laugh at you when you wake up in a cold sweat. You can’t decide whether the tall man is actually a hallucination. Before, he totally was. When you see Him off in the distance, you swear the other proxies look in that direction, too, even if it's only for a couple of seconds.
The proxies aren’t as nice as you once thought. They’re kinda mean, actually. They beat you up if you screw up during practice. But you’re so much more resilient now. The bruises and cuts heal after a few hours, and sometimes you don’t even have to be taken to the infirmary!
Occasionally, you have coughing fits and nosebleeds. It goes away after a day or two. Nurse Ann is great at treating it, but you’re not sure how she does it. Sometimes EJ helps, too, but he doesn’t come by the Mansion very often.
You miss your family and friends, even if you don’t remember much of them, but you don’t dare admit this to anybody. You’re the only training recruit at the moment, so you have no one who truly understands you.
