[trevorkeaton]

You weren’t supposed to know

[trevorkeaton]

elisechevalier:

When Trevor wrapped his arms around her, Elise let out a sigh of relief and pulled him closer to her. “I’m not giving up on you,” she whispered and shook her head when he started to apologize to her. “It’s fine, you have nothing to apologize for. Just… please be more honest with me. I don’t want to lose you.”

The two of them had been through a lot. Trevor had helped her cope with her affair with her professor and supported her through her parents being overbearing. This was the least she could do for him. “I’m going to help you out okay?”

Trevor nodded. It was nice to know that Elise had his back. “You know what,” he started. “I think we should order some takeout and watch some shitty movie,” Trevor offered. He wanted to get over it. He didn’t want to feel miserable anymore. Well, not tonight. 

“I just don’t want to talk about it anymore,” he added. Trevor wanted to get away from all of it. Trevor wasn’t used to feeling weak, therefore it was better to move on. 

[trevorkeaton]

tony-demarco:

“Fuck if I know, whatever kids write about I guess.”  Letting out a deep breath, he looked at Trevor.  “Sorry, you did not deserve that.  I wrote about my life and asked about yours most of the time. Fairly sure I asked a billion questions about you ranging from your favorite color to opinions on other things. Just things I wanted to know I guess.” He nodded in agreement, the whole situation was confusing.  In his teen years, he set the notion of having an older brother aside and decided he did not need one.

At Trevor’s next comment, Tony rolled his eyes.  “Fine, I will give you my number.”  With that said, he started listing the digits to his cell phone.  “Uh I better get dressed,” he stated as he started to grow increasingly uncomfortable in the small amount of clothing he was wearing in front of the man.  “Just so you know I know you are not to blame in all of this and it is a lot to process.” Tony had to admit his brother was handling the news rather well.  “Bye,” he said hesitantly as he started to walk towards the change room.

Trevor nodded slightly. If Tony wrote to him years ago, then he probably didn’t remember. Then, all of the sudden, Tony seemed to warm up. Trevor really hoped that this time it wasn’t followed by a snarky comment. He listened Tony and said: “Grey. My favourite colour is grey.” It wasn’t much but it was a start. 

When Trevor got Tony’s number, he was finally feeling as he had accomplished something. “Yeah, well... I’ll keep in touch! I just need to figure this thing out,” Trevor promised. He was not going to ignore the issue. “Hey, same to you. If our father fucked up this bad, he needs to come clean and own up to it,” Trevor said. He was sure that he wasn’t able to trust his father anymore if what Tony had said was true. “Okay, night!” Trevor replied and left. He sat in his car for a good ten minutes until he was able to take off. 

[trevorkeaton]

tony-demarco:

Exactly something someone would say when judging someone, Tony thought to himself.  Rolling his eyes, he took in a ragged breath.  Just talking to him was exhausting.  “Fine, the terms do not have to be mutually exclusive.”  He responded still keeping up his guard when it came to him. “Thanks Heavens we have someone like you to let all the others know we are normal people.”

Okay, so apparently Trevor had no idea the two shared a father.  Or he was an amazing actor, but by the expression Tony was fairly sure one could not fake that kind of shock.  “Fuck me,” he mumbled under his breath.  Tony was not the greatest guy in the world by any means, but he honestly did not want Trevor to find out this way.  Let alone cause issues with Trevor and their father.  

At the questions, Tony shook his head.  “Uh I do not think that is a good idea.  We are both adults now and,” he stopped really not knowing what to say to the man now.  By exposing the truth in such a manner, he was sure he turned Trevor’s world upside down.  “I dunno man. What is there really to say?”  

Trevor didn’t respond to the comment. If he wanted to keep himself from getting angry again, he just needed to ignore what Tony had said. As it turned out, Tony was mad for a reason. 

“But wait, the letters... What did you write about?” Trevor was interested. “What is there to say? Well, of course I need to talk to my...  our? I’m sorry, this whole thing is so confusing. Would it be possible for me to get your number? I just can’t understand why he’d do that and... I think we do have lot to talk about,” Trevor tried to explain himself, rubbing his chin. 

“If we are brothers, what is there to lose?” he added, trying to show Tony, that he wasn’t the bad guy in the situation. At least he thought that he wasn’t. 

[trevorkeaton]

tony-demarco:

There was a moment of pause when Tony thought for just a second that perhaps Trevor had no clue as to why he was angry.  Just maybe, he had been overreacting over the matter and his half-brother may be innocent.  After all, he was never was sure he received the letters he sent all those years.

However, the moment he heard Trevor’s voice something inside him snapped.  Tony swore he heard a tone of condescension from the man though it was probably the anger clouding his judgment.  “Because that is what I care about.  Rich kid judging me for making a living,” he responded sarcastically.  “Dancers huh?  You can just call us what we are…strippers.  It really is not an insulting term.  And what do you need to understand?  We take off our clothes for money.  Often times to pay rent.”

A sigh left Tony’s lips as Trevor began to apologize.  Not exactly what he wanted, he wanted the guy to own up and say he was a terrible big brother.  Was that so much to ask for?  But as he continued, it was starting to be evidently clear he had no idea about anything. “Our father,” Tony corrected.  “Whoa, you know what man.”  He said before smacking his lips in annoyance about the whole situation.  “Fuck, maybe this is a talk you need to have with the old man.”

Tony shook his head, “listen man, I think I just caused a shit storm that I really am not in the mood to deal with while I am sober.  Thought you knew something you didn’t and now here I am looking like the asshole.  Maybe you should just leave and forget everything.”

“I’m not judging you, jesus,” Trevor couldn’t keep his cool anymore. How did Tony know that Trevor had more than enough money in his bank account? This whole thing was just giving him a headache and Trevor wanted to leave so badly. But he couldn’t. He needed to figure out what was all of this about.

“Fine, strippers, dancers... You can be both, couldn’t you?” Trevor understood that he should calm down. A journalist shouldn’t let himself be aggravated by anyone else. “Believe me, this segment is going to show that.This was my goal, I want to show that strippers are just like any other people,” Travis explained. 

“Our father?” Travis repeated in complete shock. “Are you trying to say-” he started but closed his mouth. Was this guy his brother? Wait, how? Well, not how, more like when and why. “Well I obviously do,” Trevor agreed. e hoped that it all was a scam or a really bad joke.

“Then can I have your number at least? I need to talk about that,” Trevor was not going to leave. “All of this need some... figuring out,” Trevor said and let out a sigh. “Then we can go and have a drink or two. I’m free,” Trevor didn’t want to let this go. “So... what will it be?”

[trevorkeaton]

You weren’t supposed to know

[trevorkeaton]

elisechevalier:

Flinching when Trevor yelled at her, she closed her eyes for a moment before he started to explain himself. Elise winced when he talked about still loving his fiancee even after all these years. Sure, they had something going on when they met but the two of them had too much baggage between them and to hear him say he still loved her hurt. There was a part of Elise that hoped that he had gotten over his fiancee and there would be room for her, but there wasn’t and she knew that now.

Despite knowing it, Elise still cared about Trevor. She loved him and nothing was going to change that. He was important to her and unlike his fiancee, Elise was going to stick by him and be there for him. Stepping closer to him when he asked why she wasn’t leaving, Elise shook her head and wrapped her arms around him. “Because you’re my best friend,” she finally answered him and pulled him close. “And I don’t care about all of that. I just want to help you. I’m not giving up on you.”

Trevor didn’t say anything. He wrapped his arms tightly around Elise and just hugged her without saying a word. He felt as he was getting a little bit teary eyed but he wasn’t going to let himself get that emotional. He finally pulled away and looked at the ceiling and blinked a couple of times to collect himself.

“Uh... I’m sorry I yelled,” he started. “It’s just... It’s hard,” he continued. Trevor wasn’t good at talking about his emotions. He didn’t know what he really should talk about and what not. Hell, he even wasn’t sure what he felt or thought. It all was just a giant mess for him.  

[trevorkeaton]

Rum and lime

[trevorkeaton]

alice-jenkins:

Alice hadn’t been to one of these events in some time. She used to go more often when she was still working on Burn with Michael, but since the app had launched and she’d given up her part in the company, she’d been laying low. And yet here she was, doing Mike a favor and filling in for him because he couldn’t make it to Melbourne for some fancy gala.

She’d done her part. She’d schmoozed and chatted like she used to, and she thought the cause was great, but this wasn’t her life anymore, and she hardly knew any of these people. Bored, she made her way over to the bar to get herself a drink only to catch sight of a familiar face. “So I’m not completely alone here after all,” she turned to face Trevor with a smirk. “I gotta say, you look like you’re having about as much fun as I am.”

Trevor was pleased to find out that someone that he knew was also attending this event. Yes, some faces and names were familiar but no-one that he could truly enjoy talking to. “Alice! Finally a friendly face,” he stated with a smile. “Oh yeah, I’ve been thinking of excuses to leave early and not seem like a huge asshole. I’ve only come up with “my cat has fever” and “I think I left the iron on”,” Trevor said with a grin on his lips. He didn’t have a cat and ironing was something he didn’t really do. He paid for someone to do that. 

“So, why are you here? Okay, that came out the wrong way. I mean, I haven’t noticed you at similar events,” he continued as the bartender put the glass in front of him on a white napkin. Trevor thanked the guy behind the counter and took out a bill for the tip. The event had an open bar since people who donated wouldn’t be the ones to get as much as possible out of the event.

[trevorkeaton]

You weren’t supposed to know

[trevorkeaton]

elisechevalier:

A look of hurt flashed through her eyes when he pushed her away, making her eyes start to well up even more. “Don’t do this to me,” she begged him and shook her head. She was starting to get scared for Trevor. She saw the pills that he was taking, read every single bottle and she knew that, that many pills wasn’t normal. Regardless of whatever was happening to him, Elise still wanted to be there for him. She cared for him and he was someone incredibly important to her.

“No,” she said firmly and stubbornly. “I’m not fucking going anywhere!” Elise said and threw him a hard glare. “You’re going to have to pick me up and throw me out of this apartment. Please, let me in.” Walking up to him, she took his hand again and gave it a light squeeze. “Nothing you say will change what I think of you. You’re my best friend.”

“Elise,” he started but closed his lips again. “I... It’s not like,” Trevor tried again but failed. When Elise wasn’t ging anywhere, Trevor stared getting angry again. 

“Fuck, Elise!” he raised his voice and pulled his hand free. Trevor walked over to the table to place the bottle there and then he took a few steps to look out of the window and rub his eyes and face with his hands. “It’s just going to go down in flames! I know it. Why the fuck do you think my fiancée left me? It was the same fucking thing. I couldn’t stop and do you see us living together? No! I still fucking love her so much but I know that there isn’t any way for us to... I think she’s in a serious relationship and... Now you’re gonna fucking run like they all do!” Trevor vented. He turned around and looked at Lizzie. 

“Why aren’t you leaving?”

[trevorkeaton]

tony-demarco:

From the moment he got to work, Lisa has been on his ass for some reason.  Something Tony honestly never understood about the woman.  Since she knew him, he has always been unreliable and never on time. Why tonight of all nights to get on his case about it?  Once he was offstage, he desperately was jonesing for a cigarette or well anything to relieve the shakiness in his hands.  But she had other plans for him that evening before his next show.  Apparently he needed to answer a few questions from some tool who wanted to hear from strippers.

When he went to introduce himself, he was completely taken by surprised to see the man he knew as his half-brother.  “The sex industry?  What the hell is that supposed to mean?”  Tony asked as his eyes narrowed towards the man.  “You come down here to judge all of us making a living?” He asked deciding to keep his defenses up and start throwing out insane accusations.  Folding his arms over his chest, he realized just how bare he was given he just walked off stage a couple minutes ago putting him in a further awkward position.  But, he did not plan on budging at the moment not when his anger was getting the best of him. “You’re sorry?  Now you are sorry?”  Rolling his eyes, he could feel the rage burning inside him.  It went against his very nature to be angry, given his relaxed and chill personality.  “No, no formal introductions I suppose.  But I guess we have pops to blame on that one.  Or the fact you ignored all my damn letters, but whatever.  I guess you had better things to do.”

Of course he had better things to do, Tony thought to himself.  The two may never talk, but Tony’s curiosity caused him to check in on his brother from time to time.  See what Trevor Keaton was up to.  The man was a journalist and wrote about tough topics and despite a lot of the times the articles going over Tony’s head, there was a party of him that was proud. Not tonight though.  “How about you just fucking go, I am sure you got enough from everyone else.”  He said noticing a few of the other dancers listening in on their conversation.

Trevor wasn’t quite sure what had just happened. Had he insulted him in some way? Had he really fucked up so bad previously but didn’t remember it? Oh, maybe he had had a one-night thing with Tony’s sister? That would make sense. Fuck. Trevor knew that it was going to bite him in the ass someday but he didn’t think it would happen that early. Maybe in five years or so. 

“Look, I’m not judging you or anyone else. The sex industry is an industry just like any other, I’m working on a story on that and interviews with dancers is helping me understand the subject better,” Trevor explained himself, avoiding the word “stripper”. Maybe it would offend Tony too? Trevor tried to stay calm but he still didn’t understand why Tony was attacking him as if Trevor had stolen a car from him.

“I’m s- Look, I really don’t... If I’ve met you and caused you any harm, I’m sorry,” he started, not knowing how to calm the dancer down. Trevor wanted to leave but he couldn’t, not just yet. He needed to know what was going on. “Pops? Letters? Wait, do you know my father? And what letters are you talking about?” Trevor asked several questions, trying to finally solve the puzzle. 

“Is your shift over? If so, maybe you would like to get dressed and we could talk about this... this thing somewhere else?” he asked with a raised eyebrow. He noticed that some of the dancers were keeping an eye on the conversation and Trevor would have liked to talk to the stripper more privately. 

[tony-demarco1]

@trevorkeaton

The thunderous beats pulsated through the night air from the brick wall Tony leaned against.  Leaning his head forward, his eyelids shut tightly as he gripped the bridge of his nose with his thumb and index finger as he inhaled deeply.  “Fuck me,” he murmured under his breath before turning around and punching the wall.  Within seconds, he gently grabbed his damaged hand with the other and brought it close to his chest as he clenched down trying with his might to hold in the pain as a few rogue tears fell down his cheeks.

—Rewind

“Tony you are late!”  The young man turned to his boss and smirked, “good thing you love me or I would be worried.” A sigh left her lips as she rolled her eyes at his comment.  “Just get ready.  You are next to go up there.  Also, some journalist wants to interview some of you guys.  Just don’t say anything stupid.”  Stepping closer to his boss, he raised a brow.  “A journalist?  Are you getting soft on me Lisa?”  It was evident by her reaction; he was already getting under his boss’s skin, especially the part where she pushed him towards the changing room.  “Hurry up.”  Always one to have the last word, Tony took a few steps backwards into the room and blew her a kiss.  “Calm down, the anticipation gets the ladies all wet.”  He assured the woman who merely smacked her lips, before he started to strip out of his clothes and put on the clothes for the stage.

Tony looked over towards his fellow co-workers and chuckled to himself as a few huddled around the reporter. What kind of journalists reports on male strippers?  He figured the person had to be a hack, but the questions could be entertaining to say the least.  As the music died off from the previous act, Tony situated himself ready to be next for the crowd to devour.  Suddenly the music was on and he was on the stage, dancing to the beats as a variety of people waved their hands in the air wanting to grab his attention.  Throughout the act, he managed to get down in only his g-string and crawl along the floor as people stuffed bills inside the strings.

Finally when his act was done, he quickly made his way backstage and saw the backside of the reporter. Guess he took his job seriously to still be speaking to everyone.  Or perhaps he was trying to get someone’s number.  “Tony get your ass over here,” Lisa yelled as she smiled towards the male journalist.  “This is our newest recruit; he used to work with us a few years back and decided to return.”  More like I had no other place to go and needed the money, he thought to himself.  “Fuck can I get some clothes on and a smoke break first.”  Lisa frowned and Tony figured it was best not to argue any further.

Approaching the man as Lisa walked away to tend to some of her other employees, Tony reached out his hand to shake the guy’s hand until he suddenly recognized him.  Pulling his hand away quickly, he could feel his heart racing against his chest.  “What the fuck are you doing here?”  He asked with a puzzled expression.  All this time, he thought he put this to rest but seeing the half-brother he desperately wanted to be close to when he was younger right there sent him in a frenzy.  “You got to be fucking kidding me right now? What is this Trevor?”  He questioned, thinking the worse in the man already.

[trevorkeaton]

Trevor sat at his desk in the newsroom, looking through the clips they had filmed. Almost everything was done, now he just needed to talk to some of the strippers, male and female. He had already filmed two interviews but he needed some background information so the story wouldn’t be biased. Trevor was doing a story on the sex industry in Australia and he had already covered illegal sex work but still had to work on the legal side. He wanted to interview male and female strippers to find out if the money really is as good as the mainstream media claims it to be. 

Trevor called to so many strip joints. Many didn’t have male strippers and those who did were reluctant letting a journalist interview some of the workers. Finally a club agreed. Success. 

Around 11 pm he arrived at the strip club. He found the woman he had been speaking to over the phone, who took him backstage. “Thank you so much again, so many clubs hung up when I said I was a journalist,” Trevor stated with a slight smirk. It was funny how so many people were sure that journalists were out to get them. It wasn’t like that at all. Trevor’s main goal was to give everyone a chance to speak their mind on the issue. 

Everyone seemed really friendly. The dancers weren’t hesitant to talk, many of them came up to him and after Trevor introduced himself and explained what he was interested in hearing about, no one seemed to mind sharing their experiences. After he had talked to most of them, Lisa told him that one guy was still on stage. Trevor didn’t mind waiting, besides, he got some attention from some of the people backstage and well... Who doesn’t love that? 

Trevor was talking to Lisa when she introduced the newest recruit. “Nice to meet you, Tony,” Trevor started with his usual introduction but was surprised by the dancer's reaction. “Well, I’m doing a story on the sex industry,” said Trevor, still keeping a smile on his face. Had he met the guy? When he said Trevor’s name, he got even more confused. How did he know Tony? “I’m sorry, have we met before?” Sam had to ask. It was probably very obvious now that Trevor didn’t know what was happening. The smile had been replaced with a puzzled look. 

[trevorkeaton]

You weren’t supposed to know

[trevorkeaton]

elisechevalier:

Glaring hard at him when he told her not to go through his things, Elise could feel her blood starting to boil. “Yeah well, someone needs to go through your things considering how many pills you’re popping,” she pointed out angrily and scoffed at him. Elise was getting tired of him lying to her and wanted nothing more than the truth from him. She wanted to know what was going with him and why he was doing what he was doing.

Getting annoyed at him when he said that she was overreacting, Elise glared at him hard again. Following him when he started to exit his bedroom, Elise grabbed his hand and made him look at him. “Stop,” she whispered. “Please stop,” she begged him. “Just talk to me. You know you could talk to me.” Saddened that he was trying to keep such a thing from her, Elise the moved closer to him and wrapped her arms around him. “Please. Just let me in.”

Trevor pulled himself free and pushed Elise away to go to the kitchen. He didn’t want her pity. He opened the water bottle and took a sip. “You really need to go,” he added, keeping his eyes now on Elise. No one needed to know about him popping a pill every now and then. Let alone Elise. She was someone that was supposed to be in his life. He didn’t want to lose her like he did with his fiancée. 

“Elise, I’m not kidding, you really need to go,” he tried to sound confident. In reality he was getting angrier by the minute. He wanted to crawl to his bed and just lay there but he couldn’t. Not when Elise was still here.

[trevorkeaton]

You weren’t supposed to know

[trevorkeaton]

elisechevalier:

When Trevor explained that it was for his anxiety, Elise furrowed her brows and shook her head. She wasn’t expecting this at all. He seemed so completely well adjusted and normal, Elise never expected him to have an anxiety disorder. “Anxiety? For what?” she needed to ask before shaking her head when he told her that she needed to stay away from him or she would catch his cold.. “You’re so full of shit,” she mumbled and read a few more of the bottles in his nightstand. “This isn’t helping you cope with your anxiety! This is an addiction!”

Shaking her head, Elise put the bottle she was holding back down on the table. “I came here because we were supposed to talk about important things remember? Things about us?” Elise reminded him with narrowed eyes. “So… this is what you decided you wanted to do next?” Shaking her head, Elise bit down hard on her bottom lip as she could feel her tears starting to well up in her eyes. “Please just tell me the truth, how long has this been going on?”

“Yes, I have anxiety. Thanks for pointing it out,” Trevor replied. It was easy as that. He understood that it wasn’t normal but he didn’t want it to end. He couldn’t cope. “Hey, it’s my stuff, alright? I don’t come to your place to go through your things,” Trevor raised his voice a little. His hands felt cold to himself, it happened when he was nervous. 

“No, it’s not like-” he started but didn’t know how to end this sentence. “You are overreacting, Liz. You seriously are,” Trevor stated and walked out of the bedroom to go to the kitchen and take a water bottle out of the fridge. He felt that he needed a drink but he knew if he would bring out whiskey or rum, Elisa would probably take it from him. 

[trevorkeaton]

You weren’t supposed to know

[trevorkeaton]

elisechevalier:

Livid was putting things gently with how angry Elise was currently feeling. Trevor and Elise had been making these plans to meet up and have dinner together for nearly three days now and he cancelled on her last minute, while she was already sitting at the restaurant. With a huff, she refused to let it go and planned on giving him a piece of her mind, so she grabbed her purse and started to make her way to his apartment. Lucky for her that she had the keys to his apartment.

Opening the door to his place, her brows furrowed when she could hear the music and huffed when she realized he was in his room. “Okay asshole! What is the de-” Elise stopped talking when she caught him downing a handful of pills. A new kind of anger set in and Elise walked over to him and grabbed the bottle. “What the hell is this Trevor?” she asked him, reading over the labels. When it finally hit her, her eyes widened and she dropped the bottle in her hand. “Pills? Since when have you been doing this to yourself?”

Trevor hadn’t heard when Elise opened the door to his apartment. Even the steps didn’t raise any attention. When the door to his bedroom opened, Trevor had just swallowed two pills that were for his anxiety. In theory, he was supposed to take them when he felt actually anxious. In reality, he popped the pills like M&M-s, few a day. He didn’t know how to carry on without them.

“Elise,” Trevor said with a blank face as he stood up. “It’s for my anxiety. It’s nothing. I’m not doing anything to myself,” he started out calmly. “It really is nothing. It helps me cope with my anxiety,” Trevor repeated himself. “Why did you come over? I’m feeling a little bit under the weather,” he went on and picked up the bottle from the ground. “You should go, maybe you’ll catch it from me.”

[trevorkeaton]

You weren’t supposed to know

Mad wasn’t the right word to describe Trevor’s feelings. He had to scrap one of his stories and that meant that he had to work twice as hard next week. It wasn’t even the fact that he had to work 14-hour days next week that made him boil. He loved the story and thought it would be something special but his boss decided it would be too soon. 

Trevor was supposed to meet up with Elise but he had sent her a text 15 minutes ago that said that he wasn’t feeling that well. Good excuse, right? Trevor put on some music that matched his mood and went to his nightstand to retrieve a familiar bottle. He pushed the drawer shut and sat on his bed. Trevor was wearing dark blue trousers and gray dress shirt that had two of the top buttons unbuttoned. Trevor opened the bottle and noticed he needed to get more quite soon. Quick calculations told him that he would last another 3-4 days. Maybe even less. Trevor took one pill and swallowed it without any water. He had mastered it ages ago. 

[trevorkeaton]

Rum and lime

Trevor couldn’t believe that he had to sit through another bad charity event. How hard was it to prepare a good event? Trevor had made a donation to the fund and of course all the bigger donators were invited. He loved the cause, all the money went to pay tuition of those students, who had good results to show but no financial support. 

He looked at the stage where some twenty-something sang about love. Jeesh, it felt so out of place. The event had already lasted for two hours but it seemed to him that it was going to go on for another two. He couldn’t just leave, it would’ve been rude. If anything was going to help him tolerate the event, it was rum. He went to the bar to get himself a glass of rum with tonic and lime. 

[radrainshine]

Hunter Parrish performs at the 23rd annual “A Night at Sardi’s” to benefit the Alzheimer’s Association at the Beverly Hilton Hotel on Wednesday, March 18, 2015, in Beverly Hills, California.