eat trill

Never underestimate a sandwich.

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Who else enjoyed the Victoria's Secret fashion show?

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Gumdrop lane, for real. 'Tis the season.

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Back to lunch in LA...

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Not a complete trip to Seattle without Top Pot. The best in the Northwest! Don't you dare talk to me about Voodoo.

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Giving Thanks

Have a trill Thanksgiving, y'all! Grateful for working taste buds and hyphy friends and family.

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Cookie be trolling.

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Beloved sandwich shop Paseo abruptly closes doors

By Rebekah Denn and Alexa Vaughn Paseo, home of some of Seattle's best and most beloved sandwiches, has abruptly closed its doors. A sign on the front door attributed the closure only to 'unfortunate circumstances' and thanked customers for all their support and loyalty. There’s no official word on why the restaurant shuttered, but a lawsuit filed...

Why, Seattle, why?!?

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How many mini muffins does a muffin top make? I'll let you know, I'm halfway there.

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Ice Cream Review: Mateo's

4234 W Pico Blvd, Los Angeles

Grade: 3 and a half mason jars

I take my Spanish lessons here, unbeknownst to the staff. (They're cool with it.) The decor is comically colorful and lighthearted, which makes the ice cream that much more enjoyable. I feel like a kid again and can relate to the actual children running into the store, smushing their faces on the glass cases. The coconut ice cream includes meaty chewy flakes and the horchata, a few bits of cinnamon sugar crystals. Lesson two will cover the paletas and learning whatever mamey is.

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Carb Paradise

Carbo-loading for my walk to the conference room.

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Breakfast On The Go

I guess Frito-Lay found it necessary to double the size of their variety pack chips bags. Sounds like a filling breakfast. And I apparently hate myself.

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Pumpkin Binge: Part II

To my dining delight, I was invited to a vegan pumpkin potluck mere minutes before it began. The pumpkin theme was perfect in timing to usher in (as much as it gets in LA) autumnal November. The dinner catered an almost dessert exclusive menu to crush any doubts of my blood sugar levels. For the vegetarian or vegan pumpkin lovers out there, here's what went down:

Pumpkin risotto with peas Pumpkin and acorn squash casserole with garlic crostini croutons Black bean and pumpkin empanadas Pumpkin custard pie Chocolate chip pumpkin muffins Pumpkin filled cinnamon rolls Pumpkin cranberry scones Pumpkin white chocolate chip cookies Two types of pumpkin butter: cinnamon and honey All washed down with a variety of pumpkin ales

(Sorry, no recipes provided, but I'm sure Pinterest will have a couple options for each dish.)

I successfully tried every item, but the sweet treats had me on the verge of ravenous glycemic induced vertigo. And they say sugar's not a drug?

Pumpkin on, betches.

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Restaurant Review: Father's Office

3229 Helms Ave, Los Angeles

Grade: two mason jars

The process here drives me insane! Walk in, get greeted by smiley staff at the door who tell you that you basically do everything here yourself. Okay then. With that, one would hope that what services are provided are thus efficient and logical. Nope. Order food, drinks; everything at the bar. Stand behind ten people, crammed to the (close) back wall. Get to the front of the line for cashier/bartender/flirty Fred to hopefully acknowledge your presence. Wait another ten minutes to have said worker completely ignore you and walk away to serve his best friend who just walked in. Wait another 15 mins in the stuffy, musky, warm beer smelling bar for someone to finally give you the 'What do you want?' look, not actually ask 'What would you like?' Order all courses at once so you don't have to wait in this line again. Pay, get a number, find a seat. Food comes out... all of it. Rush through your meal because you had to order everything together and you can't let your ice cream melt without eating it with your burger before it gets cold. Have everything whisked away by the clean up crew before you put down your fork. As everyone's stated before, the burger's pretty good. They tend to cook the meat patties rare though. Frites with aioli: fantastic. Beer choices: phenomenal. Father's Office, why don't you just replace the tables with troughs? Seems like that's what you're aiming for and I'd be far more accepting of this forced boarding school dining process if you drop the pretense. Please invest in providing real service that will allow me to fully enjoy the food, atmosphere, and experience. Then I'd be inclined to return. Otherwise, LA offers many other great burgers and at more reasonable prices.

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Cheetos make the best croutons.

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Trader Joe's Pumpkin Everything Challenge

Welcome friends and (soon to be dissatisfied) strangers to a journey of disjointed judgments on food and random musings. For my inaugural post, I figured why not write on a trending topic to get all those extra seven eyeballs from Google's SEO. As all Americans know, pumpkin spice has swept the nation faster than the Ebola panic. In an attempt to relate to the general population of 20something girls (that I supposedly belong to), I drafted a Pumpkin Everything Challenge: The rules of food entry: 1. Listed in the seasonal Fearless Flyer 2. Contain 'pumpkin' in the name of said product 3. Must be a food -- no cold pressed pumpkin juice or beers necessary 4. Ready to eat or; prepared by toaster or microwave only (because those are the only ways I know how to 'cook') Challenge rules: 1. Must eat minimum of 1 serving size of each product 2. All items must be eaten in one sitting 3. No up-chuck As Trader Joe's has stocked their shelves with the most pumpkin infused goods known to Taylor Swift, I drove straight there to embarked on my pumpkin binge. With about 75 bucks worth of pumpkin junk, I'm ready to eat. And we're off! Honey Roasted Pumpkin Ravioli: Does this qualify as an adult meal? If so, I'm ready for that pap smear.

Pumpkin Ice Cream: Dense, creamy, viscous, subtly sweet in taste but packed with a enough sugar to fill Nicki Minaj's cut-off shorts. Nonfat Greek Pumpkin Yogurt: Thick and tangy, but lacking a face slapping pumpkin essence.

Pumpkin Soup: Puts the tomato soup to utter shame... Letting every grilled cheese that comes tomato's way swerve in the bowl. Whore.

Pumpkin Cranberry Crisps: Very pumpkin-y, sweetness borders biscotti territory. Not as stellar as the standard rosemary raisin crisps. Supreme crunchiness. Last leg meth-heads, beware. Pumpkin Butter: Runny and lumpy like, well... you know. Too sweet and dribbles off aforementioned pumpkin cranberry crisps. Pita Crisps with Cranberries & Pumpkin Seeds: Pumpkin infused cardboard squares? Pumpkin Waffles: The remaining seven waffles are currently cut and constructed in a tower doused with cinnamon maple syrup and butter to rival an actual interesting game of Jenga. Pumpkin Macarons: Boo! Organic Pumpkin Toaster Pastries: Was this taste tested in a Vermont women's prison? Reminiscent of real pumpkin puree sandwiched in a 20 year old copy of Wuthering Heights from the recreation library. Pumpkin Spiced Pumpkin Seeds: Pumpkin spiced diabetes.

This Pumpkin Walks Into a Bar...: Got wasted, went home with the creep in the white corduroy jacket, and ordered two plates of fried wings the next morning at Dinah's. Alone. Pumpkin Cheesecake: A formidable opponent to a classic New York style cheesecake, though freezer burn lingers like every bro at a Venice house party. No mo' molly, dude. Organic Canned Pumpkin: It's pumpkin. Pumpkin Cream Cheese: Couldn't even get this on a pumpkin bagel. Though, if this were the tablespoon of sugar to take with my medicine, I'd be back on oxy. Is pump-quil a thing yet? I hit the perennial pumpkin wall after the cream cheese, but suffice to say, my pores will secrete a very special pumpkin spice perfume a la pheromone for the next couple days. Pumpkin won this challenge, but I'm not finished with pumpkin for the season. For all the true basic white girls out there, here are the items I couldn't muster, for the full list: Pumpkin Bagels Joe's Pumpkin O's Pumpkin Cream Cheese Muffins Ginger Pumpkin Mini Mouthfuls Mini Pumpkin Pies Pumpkin Pie Mochi Ice Cream Pumpkin Spice Granola Dark Chocolate Pumpkin Spice Salted Caramels Iced Pumpkin Scone Cookies Pumpkin Biscotti Pumpkin Croutons Pumpkin Joe Joe's Pumpkin Seed Brittle Godspeed, gurl.

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Is there such a thing as too much pumpkin?