Turn on the light; it helps.

I am Audrey. Sometimes I do things. I'm a bit insane at the moment. And I will always be. How horrible would it be to...my god...NOT be insane?! Life is much more beautiful and hilarious than it is scary and annoying. I've learned that. I guess I shorted out my capacity for fear and annoyance...some of it. Now it's time to laugh and stare at wonders. Smooth sailing sometimes, bumpy rides I can mostly say, "whee" about, and wielding jewel-encrusted swords in the boss-battles in this giant video game that is called life. I like semicolons. I like a lot of things. I'd like to think I like many more things than I dislike. Oh yeah, and I'm a writer. Hey, let's go do fun stuff!

[itsvondell-deactivated20180104]

you can take one man’s trash to another man’s treasure but you can’t make it drink

[stack--trace]

Fun fact: the blending of idioms or cliches is called a malaphor.

My personal favorite is “We’ll burn that bridge when we get to it.”

[sun-spiral-deactivated20210109]

I looked it up b/c that was a very familiar idiom and how could it be wrong but then

yeah wow that’s spot on perfect

[definitelynotpatty]

[nanalew-blog-deactivated2018090]

Doctor Who is weird this year

[didiblastt]

[migellito]

[captainmaudlin]

And so I begin my tape collection

[eggsyzay]

BAGAWSH

[slorestgreen]

The pinnacle of comedy.

[trynsave]

[trashboatdax]

This was undoubtedly the best one.

[godfart]

[thatnutcray]

[stir-of-echoes]

[mothensidhe-deactivated20151028]

[CLAPPING INTENSIFIES] [CLAPPING INTENSIFIES]

[fictionsghost]

four for you, punk rock jensen you go, punk rock jensen

[fassyy-blog]

[dream-of-the-soft-look]

I’d much rather be someone’s shot of whiskey than everyone’s cup of tea.

Carrie Bradshaw (via luckisforsuckerss). (via gaixoa)

[mediumaevum]

bright sides of medieval life - no paper cuts

[azura-skye]

I will never not post science!jokes.

[wordsthat-speak]

I hope that someday, somebody wants to hold you for twenty minutes straight, and that’s all they do. They don’t pull away. They don’t look at your face. They don’t try to kiss you. All they do is wrap you up in their arms, without an ounce of selfishness in it.

(via wordsthat-speak)

[aloysia-citrodora-blog]

That’s who you really like. The people you can think out loud in front of.

John Green (via sentimentalhearts)