FORBIDDEN; REBORN

Because I am reborn from darkness, and the shadows are wisdom undenied; my power is absolute.

[truthundenied-blog]

“ They etched their flesh with shadowy tattoos “

- Taken from Zed’s new bio, in reference to his shadow acolytes. So, the students ritualistically tattoo themselves depending on their current status in Zed’s order, always in dark and twisting inks. No two tattoos are alike.

They are actually imitating the way that Zed looks himself, although what marks Zed’s skin is not mere ink; the shadows that Zed let his body play host to marked him forever, in what looks to be tattoos. Aside from his face, his body is almost entirely covered in wispy, shifting lines of black. They move like real shadows and smoke, and are darkest around his heart. The farther from his body the lighter the living markings become, but they are impossible to miss and unmistakable.

Like the scars on his face, however, Zed keeps as much of his skin covered as humanely possible.

[leagueoverpower]

[ramonameisel]

I feared the dark, but then I became.

thoughts #41 | r.m (via rmeisel)

[truthundenied-blog]

“you’ve only lost the night”

this starter is old and i lost it / not accepting

   “Have I really, spirit? Of all that I’ve lost, you think I grieve the night?”

   How can he lose the night if he is more shadow than man? Perhaps the shift to it, the beautiful parts of it; he will never again know soft darkness. But it is not a gone thing - it’s all there is left.

   He’s lost the dawn, and he’s lost the twilight, but neither will be missed; darkness has so easily found a home in him, and Zed will never turn his back to the strength that gives him.

   “I cannot lose what I have become - I have not lost myself.”

[dvoyd]

“Perhaps the most tragic fate of all,” the Devil mused, “is to commit evil for the sake of good, and to be punished for it.”

Your God loves to punish you even more than I do. (Excerpt from “Fornever”) | m.a.w (via dvoyd)

[dvoyd]

What separates the wolf from the sheep is not a matter of good or evil. We all have teeth— but only some of us are willing to use them.

you either bare your fangs or your throat | m.a.w (via dvoyd)

[onceuponamusing]

WHAT       HAVE       I           DONE      ?

                 WHAT      HAVE      I                        BECOME      ?

[onceuponamusing]

LET  THE  ʀᴀɢᴇ  DIM  YOUR  𝓼𝓸𝓻𝓻𝓸𝔀𝓼.

           LET  𝓪𝓷𝓰𝒆𝓻  BE  YOUR  ᴀɴsᴡᴇʀ

                     WHEN  YOU  HAVE 𝙽𝙾𝚃𝙷𝙸𝙽𝙶  𝙴𝙻𝚂𝙴  TO  GIVE.

[moodyspoodys]

[dying-dog]

[sematriplesix]

[truthundenied-blog]

“you can call it love, if you want”

x / accepting

   “I’ll call it tolerance - as should you, shark.”

   And even that was nearly too much; to have the foreigner going so freely within Zed’s temples and feeling so…. comfortable, made Zed think he was giving the man far too much leash to roam on.

   But a favor given is a favor owed, and though there have been none so far, Zed anticipates the eccentric man may someday be more useful than the charming annoyance he currently persisted to be.

   Careful, Master, lest your tolerance turn to something more benevolent.

   It’s little more than a snide remark from the shadow that dogs their steps, but it takes no more than that to push Zed’s temper; he grows very suddenly intolerable of Fate’s mere presence, and waves a dismissive hand in his direction.

   “If you have nothing of real substance to share with me, then leave; I do not have time for you to waste.”

[truthundenied-blog]

“i can tell you will always be a danger.”

x / accepting

   As if he - or the world - had ever expected differently.

   “I have never tried to convince you otherwise, spirit - that is a misgiving of your own.”

   It’s rude, and horrible, and it is a slight to every spirit and god that Ionia has ever called upon; mortals were not meant to speak with the spirits, not in this nature, and Zed fouls the sacredness of it merely by opening his mouth.

   But he’s grown tired of this, the fruitless begging and childish pining. Perhaps the gods stayed absent because they were all of Janna’s nature: proud, superior, aloof to the point of being completely ineffectual. Why pray to a being who would never deign to answer? What does he continue to ask of Janna if she will never have anything to give in return?

   She’s nothing, she’s nothing…

   The shadows are right, Janna is right, and only Zed is left at the wayside.

   “And that is what led us to ruin before all else; if we are not dangerous, we cannot be a danger to those who would take our land and slaughter our people,” he says, and not for the first time, but what might very well be the last.

   “You care nothing for our struggle and will never contribute to a solution; you are not a god who deserves our prayers.”

   It’s so swift, and it is so sudden, the divide created between Zed and what is good and pure; now there is him, and there is Janna. There are the shadows, and far beyond the line he’s crossed, salvation from them.

   “I have changed for Ionia, but I will not change for you.”

[truthundenied-blog]

“in this twilight, how dare you speak of grace?”

x / accepting

   It has always been this way; the wind has been propagated as a gentle, guiding spirit, but Zed has always known otherwise. Should you be so lucky to endure the beauty and the wisdom, you must also bare the strength to buffer the storms and the gales.

   Janna has not been pleased with Zed, and she has never been impressed with his bargains and his pleas; every time he thinks he has won some small ounce of her regard, he is swiftly corrected.

   “Can’t you see it, spirit? The world I imagine?”

   It is wrong of him to push her - but isn’t it impossible to forgo passion when not just the demons have shown you esteem, but the deities as well?

   “It would be grace, Guardian, if you entrusted the sword with me; I have always had the interest of Ionia in my heart.”

   And it was true, to an extent; Janna knew of his ambition and of his self-interest, but there was so much more than simple greed in Zed’s vision. He wanted peace, and he wanted to be the one who ushered it in; he wanted revenge, and he wanted security, and he wanted Janna’s trust.

   And he wanted the sword.

   Though usually they shy far from Janna’s presence, the shadows itch beneath his skin; they are the greedy parts of him given form, as he likens the purer parts of his soul to Janna. He thinks they may be the reason she will never show him partiality - but even though that may be truth, Zed cannot bring himself to regret the decision that binds them.

   His breath is slow and even and flows over his teeth, and the peace he finds with Janna lulls his impatience and his anger. The wind has no time for his temperament, and so he will not waste the audience she has granted him.

   “You know I can change nothing of my past - you know I would not,” he says, and though he cannot be sure, Zed thinks it is the first time he has admitted this to Janna openly. “But that does not condemn me to be graceless - it does not damn me to darkness.”

   A lie, the shadows boldly whisper.

   “I can know peace, Guardian; I need only your favor.”

[truthundenied-blog]

“i will not hear what you have to say.”

x / accepting

   “Have you no more fight, warrior?”

   Have you?

   The taunting shadow saps the victory from Zed’s voice, which perhaps ought not to have sounded so superior in the first place. There are many blades that keep their place at the Paragon’s throat, but among them is not Zed’s; his waning strength barely permits him to stand, and to lessen his victory by unnecessarily broadcasting his weakness when Pantheon is so close to his end seems far from worth it.

   Prideful even in the event of your own death - this is certainly the end you deserve, Master.

   It is a fair and just end for them both: Zed whose greed and toxic ambition have turned caustic, burning him away, and the Rakkor whose dying loyalty and passion and that mean, mean stubborn streak that has worn him to nothing - it is fair, that they should end here beneath the spears and the blades.

   Pantheon can hear the wet, strangled sound of Zed drawing breath, so he has to wonder if it is wise to continue; the fact that Pantheon’s pale face is still so set in its stony hatred nearly decides it alone.

   “You will hear me, because I today I have won, Paragon, and I have earned this right.”

   And is it a victory, really, if the darkness edging into his vision is not of his making and the shadows have elected to stay quiet, deeming their dying master now undeserving of their attention?

   “Was it worth it?” he whispers, because that is all he can manage; his last words may very well be a misplaced taunt to a man who values his word at nothing. “Everything you fought for, everything she had you fight for that brought you here..”

   And Zed hopes for an answer, even though Pantheon is fading faster than he.

   “Was it worth your death?”

[truthundenied-blog]

💔

x / accepting

- Sort of! Not by a romantic interest or anything, but there’s really no other way to phrase the way he felt after Kusho let Jhin live and Shen took his father’s side over Zed - losing a family like that is nothing if not heartbreaking.

[rpmemestbh]

mumford and sons starters

“take all the courage you have left”

“you’ll never be what is in your heart”

“i really fucked it up this time”

“i see the shame in your defeat”

“you take what is yours and i’ll take mine”

“i know my call despite my faults”

“i will not hear what you have to say”

“you can call it love, if you want”

“it’s a water-tight excuse”

“it’s in the eyes!”

“i can tell you will always be danger”

“you forgave and I won’t forget”

“bow my head, keep my heart slow”

“you’ve only lost the night”

“i don’t even know if i believe”

“may they comfort you tonight”

“this is never gonna go our way”

“you have been found wanting”

“i want to learn to love in kind”

“you were all i ever longed for”

“i had been resisting this decay”

“but this is all i ever was”

“your words are empty as the bed we made”

“don’t tell me that i’ve changed because that’s not this truth”

“you swore you wouldn’t do this anymore”

“there’s nothing here for you tonight”

“my heart was never pure”

“live unbruised, we are friends”

“love, it will not betray you”

“the beauty of love as it was made to be”

“so fuck your dreams”

“but no flame burns forever”

“in the dark i have no name”

“i was sure we could see a new start”

“don’t hold a glass over the flames”

“we tried so hard to live in the truth”

“do not tell me all is fine”

“i won’t let you choke”

“when i lose my head i lose my spine”

“i will learn to love the skies i’m under”

“i’m a hopeless wanderer”

“where was my fault in loving you with my whole heart?”

“you did not think when you sent me to the brink”

“lead me to the truth”

“i will follow you with my whole life”

“i’ll be home, safe and tucked away”

“i’ll never be your chosen one”

“you can’t tempt me if i don’t see the day”

“in this twilight, how dare you speak of grace?”

“in this twilight our choices seal our fate?”

“you saw no fault, no cracks in my heart”

“you saw my pain, washed out in the rain”

“i will hold as long as you like”

“just promise me we’ll be alright”

“give me hope in the darkness that i will see the light”

“that’s exactly how this grace thing works”

“you’ve gone to far this time”

“i’d be yours if you’d be mine”

“watch me stumble”

“but love the one you hold”

“so watch me as i glide”

“i’ll be your gold”

“with skin too tight and eyes like marbles”

“a lover of the light”

“let me learn from where I have been”

“for all my sweat, my blood runs weak”