Alpha & Beta: An Excerpt from Frozen Teardrop vol. 12
Translated by Zeonic Scanlations on Patreon.
AKA: How FT tried to bullshit its way out of the Episode Zero mention of a Heero-looking boy codenamed "Black Alpha" arriving on Earth way before Operation Meteor.
Lunar Surface, Katalina Crater
Underground Base
Doctor J led Odin Lowe Jr. through a reinforced door into the inner training chamber.
Junior stepped inside and froze.
“What the hell…?”
“In a sense,” J said with a grin, “that’s you.”
Seated in the center of the room, strapped into a pilot’s chair, was his exact double.
“More precisely, he’s your clone,” the old scientist went on, his mechanical fingers twitching with amusement.
“Think of him as a spare set of parts, if that helps.”
J leaned closer to the second Junior and spoke in a conspiratorial whisper.
“Do your best. Only one of you will be chosen after the training. It’s the only way for you to become real.”
“Understood…” The other Junior stood clumsily, voice uncertain. “…Nice to meet you.”
Junior glared at J.
“You’re sick. What kind of experiment is this?”
“This isn’t an experiment,” J replied. “It’s weapons development. I’ll tell you both now, there’ll be no mercy. One pilot is all my Gundam needs. Only one of you has to live.”
Junior felt the weight of his own worthlessness press down on him, yet surely his clone felt it too.
“So, what, you’re making us fight to the death?”
“Hmph. Something like that.”
Doctor J flexed his prosthetic arm with a metallic clack-clack.
“I don’t intend to treat either of you as human. You’ll be designated Alpha and Beta. Choose your label.”
“I’ll be Alpha,” the other said quickly.
“Fine… then I’ll take Beta.”
Junior forced the word out, heavy with gloom.
[…..]
Lunar Surface, Catalina Crater
Underground Base
The training grew harsher by the day.
Inside that subterranean chamber beneath the lunar crust, Alpha and Beta endured a regimen that stripped away everything but instinct.
At first, Beta, the one who had once borne the name Odin Lowe Jr., outperformed his counterpart in nearly every exercise.
Then Doctor J, peering through the glass of the observation booth, made a note in his rasping voice.
“So… memory really does become a handicap.”
That single remark marked the beginning of a new atrocity.
He copied Beta’s memories and downloaded them into Alpha’s brain.
The procedure was called Image Trace.
When they woke, both boys carried the same past, the same Odin’s teachings, the same grief over Aoi’s death.
Two beings now existed with identical histories, identical pain.
“Now you’re both the real thing,” Doctor J said, his laughter dry and serpentine.
Soon even their physical abilities evened out.
The early days, horseback riding, fencing, archery, had seemed civilized by comparison. But when the lessons turned to unarmed combat, when they fought without armor or restraint, blood and broken bones became routine.
The matches went on until one collapsed unconscious.
It was no longer training. It was sanctioned murder.
Alpha, the darker of the two, showed the greater cruelty. He attacked without hesitation, driven by the shadow within him.
Doctor J observed from above, muttering,
“When they start looking identical, that becomes troublesome.”
He stepped down, tore the sweat-soaked tank tops from their backs, and tossed each a new one.
“Black for Alpha. Green for Beta. You will not remove them without permission, not even to shower.”
“We’ve never been allowed to shower here,” Beta said bitterly, pulling the green shirt over his shoulders.
“Hmph. Listen to you talk, almost human.”
Alpha, slipping into black, muttered under his breath,
“…Aren’t we human?”
“Of course not!” J snapped. “You’re weapons. If you object to that, then become perfect weapons, and kill me.”
Silence.
Yet inside, both reached the same conclusion, "That’s an idea."
Minutes passed in stillness. Then, wordlessly, they met each other’s eyes and drew a breath in unison.
There was no longer time to wonder which of them was the “real” one.
They just wanted out, out of the pain, out of J’s control.
Together they lunged.
Doctor J’s grin widened. His metal fingers found a hidden switch.
The moment he pressed it, electricity arced through their tank tops.
The fabric had been woven with a conductive mesh; twin shocks hurled both boys backward.
They convulsed, collapsed, gasping on the floor.
“Still incomplete,” J said flatly. “Resume training.”
The two struggled upright, hatred burning behind their eyes.
“The suffering of space-born humanity is nothing compared to this,” he continued, pacing away. “Suffer more. Hate more. Grieve more. Only through that will you grow stronger. To speak for the colonies, you must first know the pain of the weak.”
With that, he turned his back and disappeared into the darkness.
His voice echoed from the corridor.
“Tomorrow we begin mobile suit training. Don’t worry, it’s no different from today. Just another kind of killing.”
The words lingered long after he was gone.
Back to back, Alpha and Beta forced themselves upright, half-kneeling, their breaths ragged.
“Life’s cheap,” one said.
“Yeah,” the other replied. “Especially mine, ”
Their sentences overlapped and broke, the rest swallowed by the silence of the underground base.
[…..]
Lunar Surface, Catalina Crater
Underground Base
Beta and Alpha were training in close-quarters mobile suit combat using early-model Leos. There was no pulling punches between them. The only armament the Leos carried was a shield mounted on the left shoulder; the rest was bare-knuckle fighting, punches, kicks, grapples. They fought on to prove that each was himself, denying the other’s existence, hating one another, turning what Doctor J had called a “mere killing match” into a duel of mobile suits.
After each bout, they had to service their own machines. It was grueling work, lashing their exhausted bodies onward. This time, instead of routine maintenance on the main motor, Beta pushed into a higher tier of tuning to improve drive efficiency. To go that far, he had to strip off battered exterior plates. The internal frame had been polished throughout; from overall assembly down to the smallest fittings, it was flawless, brooking no compromise. The meticulous finish suggested custom, hand-crafted work. It had the presence of an artwork, like a master sword.
For a mere training unit, the suit’s condition was almost suspiciously pristine. He checked the stamped manufacture date and serial embedded deep in the core frame.
AC-176 AUGUST 08
OZ-06MS LOT A12-00001
It was proof that this was the first Leo Chief Engineer Seis Clark ever built. The lot code “A12” meant twelve Leos produced in the prototyping phase before mass production. By rights, it was a historic machine fit for a museum.
“Why would Doctor J give this to me?” Beta wondered.
Seis had married Beta’s mother; he was Beta’s foster parent. Beta respected him quietly as the greatest engineer of the AC era, the man who developed the mass-production mobile suit. As a child, his Leo toy had been his treasure. And somewhere in his heart he still mourned that Seis had died aboard the Mobile Fortress Barge, trying to protect Aoi, Beta’s mother, and Beta himself. Even if Doctor J knew all of that...
“I can’t believe that man assigned me this machine out of sentiment.”
For all he knew, Alpha had been given an even rarer unit, A12-00000. He told himself it was coincidence.
Still, Beta found he could feel a real attachment to his foster father’s machine. He threw himself into the work with care and devotion. The main motor tune was a complete success; drive efficiency surged. In the next day’s sparring, he overwhelmed Alpha.
Doctor J watched and said, “You did the work yourself… You’ve got a good touch.” Praise was rare from him. “No surprise, you were under Seis.”
For weeks thereafter, Beta notched win after win. Alpha grew anxious. Perhaps his feelings toward Seis were thin; in servicing as in tuning, he could not surpass Beta’s technique. At this rate, his very existence would be denied, erased.
But it turned out to be needless worry.
“We’re changing machines. Now the real thing begins,” Doctor J announced abruptly.
They wheeled in XXXG-00W0 and XXXG-01W. One was the frame known as “Proto Zero.” The other was a stripped-down “Wing Gundam,” its frame laid bare.
Beta listened, already sensing which one would be his.
“This one isn’t finished, is it?”
“No,” Doctor J said. “I’m giving you a handicap, there’s a gap in pilot talent.” He glared at them in turn. “Alpha takes Proto Zero, its ability level is higher. Beta takes Wing, the lower spec. Make up unfinished sections and performance gaps with pilot skill.”
Their only armament would be beam sabers.
“If I gave you rifles, this base would be riddled with holes.”
Beta glanced back at the Leo he’d been piloting.
“What about this Leo?”
“I’ll take care of it. Needs ‘adjustment.’”
So it really was a rare, precious unit, Beta thought, only for Doctor J to look up from the Leo’s feet and spit out, “Sloppy work, Seis. ‘Greatest engineer of the AC era,’ is it? I’ve heard enough.”
He climbed into Proto Zero’s cockpit, powered it up, drew its beam saber as he turned, and in a blur carved both Leos in two.
Beta shouted despite himself.
“Wh-what are you—”
“A test cut for the beam saber. With Gundams in play, this kind of failure’s only good for that.”
Proto Zero showed no mercy, slicing the Leos to scrap.
“Hmph. Pathetic that this is all he could do based on the Tallgeese!”
The Leos were reduced to scrap metal. Beta had to sever himself from yet another piece of the past.
“Mm. That’s about right for beam saber output,” Doctor J said as he stepped down from the cockpit. “Mobile suit piloting skill is something anyone can acquire equally, regardless of talent or knowledge. But that notion applies only when you’re in mass-produced units built for killing.”
Beta listened, forcing down a surge of anger.
“To pilot a Gundam requires inborn genius. These machines trespass in the realm of gods. Their pilots must match them, carry a high-minded spirit to suit.” For once, Doctor J was talkative.
“You two have thought of combat as nothing but a ‘mere killing match.’ For mass-produced weapons, of course it is. But if you’re to be Gundam pilots, you must change that consciousness.” Then, suddenly, his mouth softened and his tone gentled. “No matter. Whether you train until you reach the divine, or content yourselves with being simple murderers, that you decide. But if you pilot a Gundam, understand this choice will be your lifelong task.”
He took a switch from his breast pocket, the one that delivered electric shocks.
“I won’t use this anymore. If you want to run, run. If you want to kill me, do it. I’ve handed the Gundams to you; I have no more regrets in this world.”
He dropped the switch to the floor and crushed it underfoot. Strangely, the two of them only watched. Neither tried to flee.
Alpha and Beta each answered vaguely, an “Ah…” or a muted “Understood…”
The meaning of Doctor J’s words eluded them. They looked up at the two Gundams, machines said to have reached the realm of the divine.
A note for those who have trouble measuring butter with a spoon as I do: one cup I am sixteen tablespoons. Butter/margarine bricks are usually a half a cup, so just cut one eighth of that amount
These are really good! And yes, for the love of god, if you have it use white sugar and brown sugar, add just a pinch of salt, and as many chocolate chips as you darn well please. Great with icecream, whipped cream on top, or a tall glass of milk (keep in mind you gotta eat it with a spoon, you can’t dip it in milk)
I can’t remember where I got the information now, but apparently if you stare silently for at least 4 seconds it triggers a feeling of rejection which I don’t have to tell you is uncomfortable and makes most people backpedal pretty quickly and awkwardly.
The silent stare is so effective. I learned about it in social psychology in undergrad, and have often used it to great effect. Probably the best example is when I went to sign the papers on the car I was buying—I had already worked out a price and my trade-in with the salesmen the day before—and they decided they were going to take $1000 off the value of my trade-in. (I want to emphasize that I was buying a 10+ year old car; I ended up paying $8k total.)
"No," I said. "That doesn't work for me. If you're unwilling to honor the deal we made, I'm not buying a car from you."
Well, they talk for a living. So they talked. Here I am, a young woman on my own, and these two men at the dealership are giving me all the reasons they couldn't possibly honor the deal we made yesterday.
So I sat. I didn't say a word. I just stared at them.
They kept talking, trying to get a reaction out of me. After about 10 seconds, they abandoned all pretense of logical arguments and started hammering pathos. They weren't even buying my old car from me for the dealership; it was a personal favor for which they were using their own hard-earned money to help this poor guy at church who just got out of rehab and his house burned down and his children exploded and his dog left him for another man, etc etc
I didn't say a word. I just stared at them.
They began falling apart. They continued trying to hustle me, but their confidence left them. I think they might have been sweating.
Within five minutes they caved and signed the papers for our original deal.
I have been told for years I am intimidating, and by people who had never even seen me angry. Just in general, intimidating. This absolutely baffled me until a friend one day pointed at me and said — “This! Right now! You’re being intimidating!”
Friends, I was staring silently at someone while inwardly flailing desperately to come up with a response to something they’d said that wasn’t overly rude but also was holding my ground. In my mind, I was being hellishly awkward. I couldn’t summon any charm, I couldn’t figure out a sentence to string together. Silence spooled out horrifyingly between us as I got farther and farther away from being articulate and became more and more flustered by this failure to respond. From the outside, I guess, I just looked like a stone cold bitch waiting for them to get their shit together, lol.
I still don’t think I’m intimidating but you know I’ll take it.
...Wait, so I can just do the Mom Look on full-grown people? The look I give my five-year-old when he starts to do something he knows he shouldn't... I can do that to normal adults when they do something THEY know they shouldn't?!
These are all great points, but the "are you okay?" answer is not just a tool to 'own' someone, it genuinely helps me in another way
That person is very probably not Mad At You, strangers are very rarely Mad At You, they don't know you. They are probably having a bad day and you are just some guy that happens to be there
'are you okay', reminds me that they are probably not a horrid rude person 24/7, they are probably having a bad day. And hopefully it reminds them too
I'm never saying it to shame someone into changing their behaviour, I'm genuinely asking because they probably are not okay
I'm going to say that this isn't just helpful with rude strangers
When my kid was small and acting up I would stop and ask "are you okay?" Because I assumed if they were behaving badly there was a reason and there usually was and they didn't know how better to articulate it
Now they are a teenager it's still helpful
And if me or my husband is being dick it's not usual behaviour and "are you okay?" Is helpful
Hell my teenager uses it on me
I was having a very bad mental health day the other day and it was making me irritable and frustrated and I was being kinda a bitch because I was overwhelmed and we had this convo:
Teenager: are you okay?
Me: *angrily* no
Teenager: can I help?
Me: no
Teenager: should I leave you alone?
Me: yes
And then they left me alone
And then after I calmed down I apologised and made sure they knew they hadn't done anything wrong and I wasn't irritated at them
Sometimes you just gotta give your work husband a lil smooch.
All jokes aside, even in my AU where Duo is shacked up with Hilde these two have 1000% sucked face during missions when posing as a couple. And with Heero being asexual and Duo being bi they just don’t care lol. Though Duo will argue he’s the better kisser.
This is also more accurate to the size difference I envision for them. Heero stops growing at 5’ 5” while Duo gets smacked with the puberty stick in his late teens and shoots up to a bulked out 6 feet.
I'm getting tired of eating chicken soup all week, but it's been great because I can just cook the chicken on the bottom of the pot, successively add vegetables based on their cook time, and I dirty just the pot, the knife, and the cutting board.
Do y'all have any low-effort, low-cost soup suggestions for the week?
In its most basic form, cook some onion + garlic in some olive oil, then add 2 cans of chickpeas (with the liquid!) into the pot + harissa paste to taste + broth/stock/bouillon + whatever vegetables you would additionally like. Finish with lemon juice if desired. I usually serve with egg (poached directly in the soup) + hearty bread but that’s not required ofc.
I like a mushroom and pearl barley soup, even though it takes a little bit of cooking time.
Fry an onion in oil, add sliced mushrooms + salt, fry until the mushrooms shrink a bit (plus more oil, if the pot goes to dry). Add garlic, pepper, thyme or other herbs, cook for another minute or so, then add broth (vegetable or meat, either works) and the pearl barley, about 50 grams per portion. Probably around a quarter cup? I measure mine with a Turkish tea glass, that looks about right in terms of size. Boil until the barley is tender - the one I have currently is coarsely milled instead of whole grains and will take around half an hour.
Curried lentil soup, where you fry up some onion, ginger, and garlic, add a generous amount of the curry seasoning of your choosing (Indian curry paste, thai curry paste, curry powder, etc), then add in some carrots, fry a little longer.
Add maybe 3-4 cups of stock (if you're using a very salty stock and a saltier curry paste, thin a little with water, if you're using curry powder, taste at the end and add salt if needed) and a cup or so of red lentils (double it if you're planning on a big pot and lots of leftovers), cook on an enthusiastic simmer until the lentils are soft, maybe 15-20 minutes.
Add some chopped green vegetables like kale, spinach, etc (I like the individually frozen cubes you can get, they're a great thing to keep in the freezer and chuck into stuff for added nutrition) in the last few minutes of cooking, if you've got them, and a generous spoonful or two of lemon or lime juice right before serving (I usually go for lemon if Indian curry seasonings, lime if Thai).
It's a very forgiving base recipe and good for using up what you have.
If you've got some yams or potatoes, that's good to add some small cubed ones in when you add the lentils and stock. If you don't have any green vegetables, it works well without. If you've got cabbage or bell peppers, add some in in the same stage when you're frying the carrots. If you want some extra protein, peanut butter is good in here as well and adds extra creaminess. If you've got some coconut milk that's a great thing to add, too. Tomatoes or tomato paste, can also be added if you like em, use a lil less citrus if you're doing that. For a slightly sweeter variant you can add some chopped apples. If you don't have lemon juice or lime juice, a dash of a nicely flavoured vinegar is good too, like apple cider or white wine vinegar.
Sausage, Goat Cheese, and Winter Squash soup. It's legit got five ingredients and is insanely good
cut 2 winter squash in half (any squash that isn't spaghetti squash, butternut, or summer squash will do) and put them in the oven for about an hour (or until the squash is soft) at 350. Fry up 1lb of breakfast sausage and a chopped white onion. Get a pot, put in 2 containers of chicken stock (64oz), the breakfast sausage/onions, and the scooped-out inside of the squash. Simmer lightly for 15min. Mash up any big chunks of the squash that are still left, then add goat cheese to taste.
Gundam Wing Side Story: A Scythe In My Right Hand, You In My Left
Did you know that in this novel, Wing Gundam Zero was actually launched at the same time as the original five Gundams of Operation Meteor, but for some reason, it never appeared in OZ’s data? 🤔
With no pilot listed and the machine left abandoned, it was Duo Maxwell who was sent to retrieve it, making him, not Heero, Zero’s pilot. Say what???
What do you think this twist says about the story, and about Duo’s role in the Gundam legacy?
This post has a very narrow target audience, Lucanis romancers who chose the "I also love coffee!" option during the Treviso coffee date.
A big shoutout to everyone else who has baked the Nevarran Hazelnut Torte before me because they made me panic less when I reached the "why is this just a big ole lump" stage. 🖤
the thing with romance for me is that you need to convince me through behavior and dialogue that the characters enjoy spending time with each other and seek each other out. even with enemies to lovers a foundation of mutual respect goes a long way. you can be like "he's the youngest ever general of the dragon slaying guild and I'm secretly a dragon, but he's the best swordsman I've ever fought and our sparring matches are the only thing that make me feel alive ever since my family was killed." if he implies something similar then bam, you have a reason for the two of them to hang out even though one of them knows it's dangerous. you can't be like "he's a dragon slayer and he's mean to me all the time but the flex of his arms when he swings his sword is just too sexy." it does not matter how many times you have your protagonist say "I shouldn't be drawn to him... but I am" if you never show a real moment of connection between them that draws them together
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