imagi-nation

go-getter person. an old soul.

[ulithanifah]

so, what i need is to create a distance from anything created by me, all the abstract memoirs, all the shadows, and the quiet corners inside of me.

if a time machine existed, maybe i would try again, but nothing like that exists in this real world, even if i try.

part of me still believes that nothing comes without strings, so i just keep walking, and follow what life brings.

this big daydreamer with a touch of klutziness, what a combo right? the pace is dynamic, shifting fast between ups and downs, so uptight.

and still, a part of me longs for those. i don’t know what will happen, but i pray even if it lost. all were great, not all good, but great.

and it will always be. i believe it.

[ulithanifah]

i realized that i never been so focus with only for myself. so maybe that's why i am very much settled, at least here. the thoughts came by when someone ask me, how is your health? are you doing okay here? or are you always this busy?

strangely, i feel better. well maybe i am. and also i never thought that i can busy for my own.

im not regret everything that ever happened to me, but im very grateful, that i get my own moments now. all things i do here are very encouraging. my dreams suddenly re appears. i think i can do it, slowly. i always believe, working hard for good things, will gain something good too even if its not the same what i thought from the moment i start. Allah knows i tried, Allah will give me the best result of anything that i pursue.

[ulithanifah]

everyone is very nice. please be happy, healthy, and successful.

[ulithanifah]

remember how hard you try to go up while carry those weights on the night, to see how great the scenery on the morning.

whatever your goals are—keep trying.

i can count on you in the future too right?

[ulithanifah]

reminiscing how was my life in past 10~15 years back thru social media. i don't believe that i was so active on that time. i admit that my social skill is better on that time, lol.

its just funny that myself and also my friends back them are all so silly. maybe that we don't have the burden that we have now.

is it just the perks being older? or maybe i just forgot how to be like that anymore?

maybe. but i am very thankful to myself, that even in the middle of many things happen on that time, when maybe i had more downs than ups, i can smile brightly.

thank you. you were amazing.

[ulithanifah]

Busy people, busy night. Sometimes we dont realized that other creatures are live between us. Including you. Take a look and listen. Rest for a while, remember what have you done on this past years.

I have done great. I am great.

Even if you do mistakes. Even if people dont recognize it, you have to. Because its your life. Make it precious.

[ulithanifah]

Backwards is not a minus, its zero*

Wake up in the middle of the night after meeting with old best friends, yes best friends. I am not good at befriend with people, not because I dont want to but I had many failed attempts to get real friends that click with how I think about life. How I choose to spend my time more about my family, focus on that only from my senior high school. Nothing more precious for me than that.

I suddenly think how the years have passed in my life, see people grew with time, and still growing until today. My heart sank a little bit to think that I did nothing but backwards on this past two years. I am feeling on a "minus" state.

Then I recalled people who used to be supportive and people that I liked a lot because how they live their own life. I used to be inspired yet I feel envious to how well they run their lives.

Suddenly I read my draft of my notes when I was 24th, see how my mind think about the purpose of life and who am I in this spacious world. Then this just popped on my head like, "Oh, I am not bad at all, I am doing my best. And I can do that again". I am actually a better person that the person Im envious with on that time.

Now Im feeling I am not on the "minus". I am just at the zero. Because now I can start to go up again. I can do that. I CAN.

[ulithanifah]

Of course it’s sometimes hard to think about certain matters, but if I were to choose between a thoughtful life and a not-so thoughtful life, I wouldn’t hesitate to choose the first one. 

--a good friend of mine.

thank you. the words always cheered me up.

[ulithanifah]

When I’m far from home Always comes to mind, I still remember

[ulithanifah]

random talk

oak and willow. I love those trees. The name is so pretty and the trees are so fantasy-like. 

found out, oak symbolize wisdom, strength and endurance.

while willow symbolize deep inner knowledge and open-mindedness.

so happy to hear that. I wish I can have their character as I love them since 13.

here is the oak, 

and here is the willow,

people who love fantasy stories could probably recognize them.

[ulithanifah]

Bahagia ya Allah. Tiba-tiba di chat hangout begini.

“Teh, aku jadi duta KSN Matematika! Kalalu lolos ikut ke tingkat berikutnya.” Baru di tahap itu pun, aku sudah dibuat menangis. 

Bangga, bahagia. 

Hari-hari lelah langsung melebur sudah. Terima kasih de, sudah bekerja keras dan hidup dengan sebaik-baiknya. Terima kasih.

Teteh juga akan melakukan hal yang sama.

[ulithanifah]

Alhamdulillaah akhirnya healing oge di taman kota yg sepi. makan junk food, ngobrolin hal kaditu kadieu bener2 memperbaiki kualitas mood.

kudu dijadwalkan ini mah. tengkyu kure dan siti

[ulithanifah]

thanks to Matilda, I found who is Charles Dickens.

[ulithanifah]

Seperti biasa, kalau ada acara ketemu sama barudak pasti mimpi dulu sebelumnya, jadi kaya reminder mesti luangin waktu gitu. Beneran random, tapi selalu kejadian. Sedihnya udah 2 kali gak bisa luangin waktu, entah sakit atau apa. Mungkin memang belum rezekinya.

[coklatmaniss]

‏

Orang shalih terdahulu saling berwasiat dengan tiga kalimat, yang seandainya ditimbang lebih berat dari emas:

(1) siapa yg memperbaiki hubungan dgn Allah, maka Allah perbaiki hubungannya dgn manusia; (2) siapa yg memperbaiki dirinya saat sendiri, maka Allah perbaiki dirinya di hadapan yg lain; dan (3) siapa selalu memperhatikan urusan akhiratnya, maka Allah jamin urusan dunia dan akhiratnya.

[ulithanifah]

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim..

[ulithanifah]

The n-th discussion about life with NY

Well, diskusi panjang tentang hidup memang agaknya sulit mendapatkan jawaban. Berapa kalipun dibahas. Tetap sulit. Hidup itu uncertain, admit it. 

Atau mungkin kita melupakan jawaban pasti dari hidup, yaitu mati.

Mungkin kalau ingat mati justru kita hidup, dan hidup gaakan uncertain lagi.

Semua jelas. Pasti.