Unclemamaeric @unclemamaeric - Tumblr Blog

I get stronger everyday. I can feel the emotional wounds starting to heal. I know this because I have been laughing more lately. I know this because every time I laugh I can feel the skin on my head pull. I know this because I have a wound on my head that is still healing and every time I laugh the skin that is trying to pull itself together and become one again is stretched and screams. So, it only hurts when I laugh.

It’s weird when you realize the person you thought was the first and the last in so many things is not that person. Much has happened over the last 6 weeks. An Angel appeared and influenced me to visit the dermatology clinic she worked. I felt a conviction in her that caused me to go and have the three biopsies that would reveal the melanoma on my upper for head. a week later a woman called from another doctors office to explain the surgery that would take place later that week to remove the cancer cells from my scalp. Once again Angels were around, and all the cancer as able to be removed with the initial extraction. Problem solved. A week later the woman I consider my soulmate and the mother of our daughter tells me she has no emotional connection to me. For a week she tells me the feelings she has for an employee who had tendered her resignation. I feel emotional destroyed. But you cant make someone love you. And then I made some bonehead decisions. But always with the thought of what is best for our daughter. But still bonehead decisions. Over the last two weeks I have spent a great amount of time thinking about what you owe your son or daughter. I have come to realize you owe them everything because they show you all that is great about you. It is this mirror that shows you all the things wrong with you. I have learned over the past 2 weeks that if I use what is best for my daughter as my compass than I will always do right. I have never been, nor never will be perfect, but I feel that if I remain true to the idea that what is best for my daughter is best for me I can do no wrong. My Ex keeps talking about our relationship, but I don't know what that means. I have come to realize that so much time is wasted on rehashing a past that cant be changed.