𝗲𝗻𝗱𝗹𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝘄𝗮𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴.

[undvine]

edit 27th may: currently on hiatus. i am planning to move blogs between now and the second week of june. until then there will be no ic activity and very sporadically some ooc posts. you're free to unfollow if you no longer wish to be mutuals. i do ask you softblock me so i won't be following you either.

[undvine]

dark academia 👏 dark academia 👏 dark academia plots when?? w h e n ? 👏 i came across the saved info of an ancient blog of mine and now i can't stop thinking about it.

[undvine]

at least i can offer those who are awake seraphina in these trying times. my beautiful beautiful sapphic vampiric witch. she's always having a good time. with her literal cackle of a laugh. she really has the most ugly laugh and i love her for it. her familiars that aren't her familiars literally give her a headache bc they don't respect her sdjahfkkj or do they?? idk he always has beef with them. quirky sera with her shark teeth. sera who longs for family and his own community again bc his own literally kicked him out. anyway seraphina. useless sapphic but she def has 'it'.

[undvine]

woke up feeling like ✨️ the blood ritual will be soon upon me ✨️ and i am not here for it. it's fascinating the way your mood just drops completely bc of it. i'll quietely work on the blog a bit more but ngl i am so tired of it asggsgaga cant i just project everything 🫠 hmm, anyway i'll be around-ish today depending on whichever emotion tbe wheel of misery falls 💃✨️

[undvine]

thinking about soft love. and how i genuinely want to write that more. i love my toxic, angsty, rollercoaster romances and will ALWAYS be up for writing it but i just crave this rn and i crave it mostly for evren right now. who's love is so quiet but strong !! how he doesn't want that blazing, burning, loud love to know he's cared for. he doesn't need thrill, doesn't need push and pull. warmth, gentle admissions, domestic happiness. finding each other in the little things and finding solace in simply being in each other's space. enjoying hobbies. just existing together knowing you have that other person. that's what he wants.

evren's past with romantic love is paved in thorns and tragedy. betrayal. to love again for him would be to offer an already broken heart that's grieving the loss of a child and the subsequent departure of his partner ( who did so by betraying their vows, another kind of loss ). to allow love, in whichever form, to find him again would mean he'd have to find a place for this aching hole in his heart, there where his baby boy used to be. and there where the memory of his wife placed irreparable damage. the memory of what she did to be exact. therefore loud declarations of love or trying to aggressively woo him won't work. it will push him away. he doesn't need that. want that. he had that and it got him hurt beyond repair. a love that's a soothing balm. where he can offer his own warmth in return, his own silent but strong affection. something steady, calm waters, a strong foundation. that's what he needs.

[undvine]

the tenth circle of hell is not being able to write when you REALLY want to bc you've put yourself in a self imposed jail of not writing anything until you finally revamp / move. but the tenth circle of hell is also seeing all the goodies on the dash and restraining yourself from sending anything in bc you want to only do that when everything is fixed first. fuck my non - baka life.