Get domesticated, idiot

Fights to live, fucks to survive, persists out of spite.

[unnervinglyferal]

Probably sums up how I'm doing that I got a doctor's appointment for my birthday, and I completely forgot that it is my birthday before the doctor noticed my birth date.

[unnervinglyferal]

I met with the rabbi at long last (he’s a very busy guy and I think that’s a good thing) and we got to talk a bit about why me and my human are “converting”

He doesn’t like the term conversion because it’s not like he’s changing me into something else or something like that, he doesn’t turn me into a jew

And I 100% agree, because it’s a very similar thing as being transgender to me that it’s just externally recognizing an internal thing that was there the whole time

In fact, the way I explained it to my abuelita is that I was a Jewish man born into a Christian family and assigned woman at birth and that disconnect would always cause me pain until I addressed it

And I’m learning hebrew!! I know, a couple letters and how they sound and I can kinda sound out some words. I believe you read/speak/understand it, yes? If so, I’d love to ask you for help with my spelling and stuff

שלןם!

(That’s supposed to say “shalom!”)

Congratulations! I have to warn you that my hebrew is roughly on the level of a toddler, I can vaguely understand it but can't write or speak as much of it as I ought to. But I can try.

[unnervinglyferal]

I get that you probably don't have a lot of time for it anymore, but are you still drawing? Your art was really cool from what I've seen of it.

I can't remember the last time I had the time to draw. I hope I still know how when I get the time to try again.

[unnervinglyferal]

Hi again, Feral!

Good news! You know the person I wrote you about a while back? The one who I was unsure if I was in love with? Well, we had another school dance yesternight, and with the encouragement of my friends, I did end up confessing.

In retrospect, maybe the following things I said (paraphrased) weren't the most fitting for a confession of this type:

"How do I know if I like 𝘺𝘰𝘶?"

"Do you know what Homestuck is?"

"They could be playing Sneakernight right now."

"I'm sorry for feeling this way."

But, y'know, it turned out pretty well! Apparently we're both confused, but it's a step forward nonetheless.

Also, the Film we're shooting in my class is going better than expected- we got, like, 1/3 of it done! Which is better then 1/6 of it.

-Engineer Anon

I'll be honest 100% of what I know about Homestuck is that you probably really should not have asked like that. But then again it would've been a good way to make sure whether or not the feelings are mutual.

[unnervinglyferal]

I have a rock

It's great

Very round

Just found it while grabbing other rocks

You don't find round and almost unnaturally smooth rocks in the wild that often

Usually they're well rock shaped and scratchy, some will be smooth, especially the quartz that tend to be in road gravel cause it's been affectively tumbled but is those are rock shaped

This is a round smooth ball of quartz

It's not like it's a perfect sphere but it's damn close

Those are my other rocks

It looks like it could hatch something. Cursed stone seagull egg.

[unnervinglyferal]

Ever since Stinkbug learned to talk, she is yet to shut up since. If she's quiet she's napping.

[unnervinglyferal]

How goes life, Feral? It's going interestingly over here.

A lot of good things- I'm trying to slowly get back into baking, though whenever I make cupcakes the recipe seems to think the ideal ratio of frosting to cupcake it 1-1, which is generally not the popular preference. So I usually end up with leftover frosting.

I tried making cheesecake, but it got stuck to the bottom of the pan. Still tasty, though.

One minor issue is one I'm having with a class project, in Film and Literature.

We got the opportunity to collaborate with another class of mine, Creative Writing. Actually, most people in Film & Literature are also in that class. The Creative Writing class writes a script, and the Film and Literature class acts it out. Great idea, right? You'd think.

The first shoot day, we got NO footage. Why? We spent half the class just setting up the lights. The rest..

"Hey, you're not supposed to be in frame."

"I'd suggust making the hair light more to the left."

"I don't think the mic picked that up well enough."

I completely understand that people want the take to look as good as possible, but we literally ended up getting NOT A SINGLE ONE. People kept talking when they weren't supposed to, and to make matters worse, it was 85 degrees and someone turned off the AC because the sound of it was audible on the recordings. So I was just standing there, slowly overheating, as people around me kept talking and pointing out numerous problems.

Another thing is that we were supposed to have 3 weeks for this. We ended up losing one week because an outdoor school event got moved to the day we have the Film and Literature class on.

Did I mention the script is 8 pages?

So, in order to finish shooting the script, we would need to do the following in the span of an hour:

-Memorize all of our lines

-Film 8 pages worth of dialogue and action, including scene changes

-Edit all of the footage

-And export it.

I.. do NOT have high hopes.

-Engineer Anon

Fuck that sounds like a lot of work. A lot of fun, or at least interesting, but a lot of work. We're doing well, Lump is fortunately a lot more chill baby than Stinkbug was. She just hangs along, looking at everything like oh so that's what we're doing now, just going with whatever's going on. She's reaching milestones just as well as Stinkbug was, but she's not as loud and angry about it.

[unnervinglyferal]

I hate being asked what I've been up to. Like look I have two small terrorists at home and my entire plan for the day, the week, the weekend, and the next five years of my life is to just stop them from doing whatever they were planning to do today.

[unnervinglyferal]

I applied to an organization to get a service dog because I need one and for years my human has been my service human and the mental stability of another person, no matter how much she loves me, is just too much to bear. But! A dog could do it! A dog, who’s entire job is “keep Puppy mentally stable” would happily do that.

I’ve wanted a service dog for years, but I wasn’t diagnosed with even half of the bullshit going on in my brain until a few years ago, and doctors give a lot of shits about what’s on paper, even though my struggles were real the whole time :/

I feel… complicated about it all. I don’t like looking at my own limitations, acknowledging that I am disabled and I need more help than typical people and I probably will for the rest of my life. It hurts.

I wish I was just happy about the prospect of getting a dog, having a better easier life where instead of clinging to my human when I’m afraid or unstable, and I risk drowning her as well. I can cling to a dog, who’s happy to be clung to.

The organization said on their website that they might get back to me in like six or eight weeks or something, and they got back to me in one week, so, that means. Something. Good somethings I hope?

Hopefully good. You'll be better off with the aid you need. I still don't know anything about dogs, but getting disability aids that you need is always better than not having them. Don't compare to what other people can do, compare to what you can do with the assistance to what you can do without it.

[unnervinglyferal]

Dude, so much has happened that Im not sure what Ive told you about and what I havent.

Molly had to be put down and an uncle I hadnt seen in years died on the same week.

Dropped out of college and it ended up in my entire class and 4 teachers dropping out and quitting.

I got confused for a prostitute when I was waiting for my mother to pick me up after going back home on the bus.

Ive been with Silver/Di for 2 years now, HOORAY

And uhhh Folly still lives. She hates my ass but she also loves me

Holy shit life's been busy wrangling you. Glad most things are okay, sorry to hear about Molly, your uncle and the college.

[unnervinglyferal]

I have a kid now

Bernard Englesman

I never got to have a boyhood, he never got to have any kind of manhood. So I’ll just have to live the life of a happy jewish man for him.

His memory is a blessing

Huh. Congratulations.

[unnervinglyferal]

We were talking about ages, dates and birth years, and out of sheer curiosity I started doing some math. My wife is a year and a half younger than I am. Her great-grandmother is 86, born in 1940. My father died when I was 17, which was in 2022, and he was 65. So he was born in 1957.

The age difference between my father and my wife's grandmother's mother is 17 years.

[unnervinglyferal]

You don’t have to forgive me for making this, lol.

When you said that it’s very important to people that the lion has a dick, my first thought was that the dick isn’t very prominent. I mean I didn’t even notice that it has a penis at all, I figured that was just a tuft of fur or something.

So I took matters into my own hands and uh

Yeah! 👍

(It’s definitely a canine penis and not a feline penis, since I got it from a wolf furry, but like. It gets the point across just fine.)

I didn't know it was possible to be repulsed and impressed at the same time. I'm speechless.

[unnervinglyferal]

https://satwcomic.com/coat-of-arms

Thought you might get a kick out of this comic about coats of arms lol. Idk how to feel about the fact that the Finland lion has one armored human arm though lol. Like, maybe they figured a lion can’t hold a sword and they really wanted it to be stabbing itself so, human armored arm? The Norway lion is holding an axe with lion paws though. So maybe the medival Finns were like “holding a weapon with paws is just silly. Giving the lion one (1) human arm is way more realistic.”

I also love how all these Nordic(?) countries were like “we gotta put lions on our stuff, lions rock” even though you really aren’t going to find a lion on the same *continent*. And the bears are *right* there if you want a giant and impressive animal to represent your might as a nation or whatever. But nah. Gotta be lions. 🦁

I think there were some political historical reasons for choosing lions, idk. Like the Nordics really really wanted to be part of the (allegedly) more civilized cool kids club that was central Europe, so instead of choosing bears, which would have made sense, they chose lions because everyone in Europe was doing lions. Also finnish people are weirdly emotionally attached to the coat-of-arms lion's dick. It's a male lion with a mane and everything so it has to have its cock out too.

[unnervinglyferal]

Leonard Cohen's Hallelujah is one of the most profoundly jewish songs that I know, from the very beginning to the end. It starts with King David, politely acknowledges that the listener probably doesn't care about any of this, and then continues to go on about all of that for an entire song.

[unnervinglyferal]

Men who could do so much more than I could keep failing because they refuse to do so many things I'm not even capable of. And it shows in how small and pathetic things people will praise me for.

[unnervinglyferal]

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