Ashton/River🍃✨ @unstableriver - Tumblr Blog

heisunderwater-deactivated20240

:3

ezekielsdecent

MALE THINSPO !! :3

𓏵

cazieve6

🎀Trans Masc Th1nsp0!!!!💗

I hope Everyone Likes it!!! and Has had a Amazing safe day!! <333. You deserve To be safe always! :3

I Hope This Was Accurate!!!!! And we start to see more gender Equality And M@leSp0!!! ^^

@diaryofatwentyfirstcenturywhore 💗

emotionaleating

i-will-recover-tomorrow

curiasdairy

being able to sit like this without feeling your belly fat is my biggest motivation

boopicide

i don't wanna die, i just wanna never have existed in the first place.

persocomie

being fat makes everything feel so wrong

i cant take a shower and feel clean, i cant sleep and feel relaxed, i cant go for a walk and feel refreshed

im tired of being disgusting

im embarrassed to be alive

soupanddietcoke

Relaxed vs sucking in

decayingkittenmcr-deactivated20

SAY IT WITH ME

Vent blog ≠ Pro Ana

Most eating disordered people DO NOT want recovery. That does not make them pr0.

palesilene

Nothing hurts like my friend saying “I don’t think that’ll fit me, it’s too big” to my clothes.

at least she gives me motivation ⭐️

worstxana

low calorie dessert recipes

cravingthin444-deactivated20240

boldandburnt

I worked so hard to destroy myself, why would I get better?

thereisnothinghereagain

Where are all my adult anas?

It's a different world stepping into Eds shoes again half way through life.

I don't have to worry about my parents getting mad at me

I don't have to worry about my school teachers getting mad at me

I don't have the typical teenage drama that spurred this mentality shift

I remember Ed being a call a shout for help just to be seen and cared for as a teenager. But now no one sees me, I have no watchful eyes on me. No one whispering under their breath, no parents staring at me across the dinner table as I play with a half eaten plate, no boy trouble or pubescent drama fueled by hormonal rage and indifference. I'm not doing this to impress the boy I like or try to fit in with the popular kids.

I am invisible

Except from myself.

I'm in a strange state of visible translucency. I tell people I'm fasting and they believe me, I tell people I'm too tired to come meet them for dinner they believe me.

Fuck, even my live out partner whose been here for the last 3 days who I have said the words 4norexi4 to and who has watched me consume nothing but tea for 3 days doesn't question my choices.

How different a world it is when you're seen but not seen. I am validated but I remain a shadow.

About three months ago I started working at both Sally and Spirit Halloween and I was like barely eating and was just working I worked a week straight at spirit then the first day I saw my manager after that week first thing she said is “wow you come back a whole different person you’re so much smaller!”

I miss hearing that. I’ve maintained since then. What is wrong with me :/

w1nterst4rving

oh my gosh when i lose weight!!!!!!!!!!!! all the clothes im gonna buy im so fucking excited!!! can you imagine? my hoodies, all incredibly baggy, they dont cling onto my wide hips anymore. my tights? they show off my skinny legs and my cute thigh gap :D and the black color makes me look even thinner! i can wear cute tops that show a tiny bit of stomach cause mine wont be pudging out. cute skirts, cute shoes, LEG WARMERS!!!!!!!!! layering clothes without feeling like a gross sweaty pig, the list goes on.

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Ashton/River🍃✨