upfromthemud

How a childhood of trauma and abuse became my springboard to truth, love and a greater purpose.

[upfromthemud]

An abused child

Donald Trump is a text book example of someone who was raised by a tyrannical father and a mother too weak to protect him. 

I know the world where he comes from very well. Just another frightened, abused, humiliated child without the inner strength to overcome.

While I pity the man I know that he and his cabinet are just puppets of something much darker and even more evil. The answer is not to resist but to persist on a path of healing, kindness, compassion, community and when necessary revolution.

[upfromthemud]

Gabor Maté: Jungle To “Civilization” - How Plant Medicines Can Promote Health In a Toxic Culture

Learn more and donate: http://www.maps.org/ Gabor Maté, MD From Jungle To “Civilization”: How Plant Medicines Can Promote Health In a Toxic Culture 2017 Psyc...

This is one of the best presentations from the conference. I had an opportunity to speak with Dr. Mate twice over that week and it was amazing. But there’s something particularly interesting in the comments posted afterward and it goes right to the root of why psychedelic science is headed for another disaster. Just like in the 60′s white counterculture took it from a two thousand year old cultural framework and popped it like aspirin. This set scientific work back over half a century. Once again the ego of modernity says that we can have all the benefits without respecting the thousands of years of work that came before. Yes Ms. Red Bear is somewhat awkward and emotional in her admonition of Dr. Mate and yes Dr. Mate speaks from a position of white privilege which is a shame. But what you don’t see is Gabor’s very public apology to Ms Red Bear which reveals how entrenched white privilege and our toxic culture is in even the best of us.   

[upfromthemud]

Innovative school helps traumatised children thrive

https://www.positive.news/2017/society/26951/school-helping-traumatised-children-thrive/

[upfromthemud]

First she became a 13-year-old internet meme. Now, she's treated like a porn star | Nancy Jo Sales

The story of Danielle Bregoli – who became an overnight sensation after a memorable TV appearance – shows just how easily society sexualizes girls

OUR PEDO-CULTURE.

[upfromthemud]

I was wondering if you thought it was possible for a husband to rape his wife. If it truly was rape if the woman didn’t fight back tooth and nail, but made her feelings known. Is it possible the man isn’t aware that what he’s doing can be hurtful? If he is in fact unaware, is it actually rape? Its hard to get a man's perspective on this.

Simple answer is- No means No, no matter who it is. But here’s what affected me personally about this question…

I was in an on again off again relationship with a woman that I would later come to realize was a csa survivor as well. This was many years ago and we were both living in denial. Over time our sexuality became more and more intense as we fell into roles of abuser and victim. I would play with her at night and she would say quietly “No daddy” and I would say “Shhh” and “Good girl”. She would turn her face away and not kiss me until coming close to orgasm at which point we would kiss deeply, orgasm and profess our love for each other.

Fucking great! This was kinky awesome sex! This was hot! Hey it’s just a fetish!  C’mon It’s just innocent fun! This is what we told ourselves. This is what we all tell ourselves.

And it was fun! Of course it was. But afterward, post coitus I always felt a darkness pass through me.

What I think we were really doing is returning to our abuse night after night in an attempt to put a happy face on it. This was a place where we were simultaneously most comfortable and most afraid. Loving sex or maithuna was beyond our comprehension. We were raping that child within us over and over again, and making excuses. Just like the original abusers did.

And while we thought we were great in bed our inner children would play out in the real world resulting in very, very, deep, emotional pain for both of us.

No means No. But I wonder if sometimes even an enthusiastic “YES” could mean “No.” Is this something you want at your deepest level? If it is then I don’t think you should feel that veil of darkness pass even for a split second.

That’s why I feel it’s important to be with yourself and examine what you really want and who you really are before combining with another life force. So that you can plug into a powerful sexual unity rather than continue to patch and repair and compromise in sexual relationships for the rest of your life. Aspiring to be nothing more then a “Sexy” couple.

I think we can ask for more out of our sexual lives then freaking “50 Shades of Gray.” Thank you for posing the question and allowing me to explore myself more deeply. I’m not sure if I’m right about any of this but its worth exploring! I really appreciate it.

[liberatingreality]

When you begin to become conscious, more aware, when your eyes begin to open, the first thing you see is how deluded you are and how much you’re holding onto that which makes you suffer. This is, in many ways, the most important step: Are you willing to be aware?

Adyashanti (via liberatingreality)

[fullpraxisnow]

[progressiveresistance]

The most important exercise you’ll do all day.

[yokalemi]

Deathless: Surviving Sex Trafficking and the Capitalist State “ In this Real Women Real Stories video, Anneke Lucas, founder of Liberation Prison Yoga, articulates a message of hope for a troubled world through making a radical shift away from the current hierarchic capitalistic system that benefits the few at the expense of the many. Feeling is the gateway to awareness, and the key to a better future. Women and girls, historically kept out of power through rape and sexual violence, are ideally positioned to heal their pain, expand their consciousness, and find compassion and understanding for everyone. Only love and understanding will change the world. “

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Psychedelic Drugs for Depression and PTSD?

Berkeley Wellness explores psychedelic research investigating psychedelic-assisted psychotherapy as a treatment for depression and PTSD.

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We’re gaining momentum in our work to make MDMA a legal medicine! The next $30,000 in gifts will be doubled thanks to a match from Britt Selvitelle. In just over a week, 229 generous donors have raised $33,450, including Justin Rosenstein’s $15,000 match. Thank you, Justin and Britt, for inspiring us! Double your gift: maps.org/mdma2016

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Using MDMA to treat PTSD: ‘I felt like my soul snapped back into place’

PBS News Hour speaks with MDMA-assisted psychotherapy trial participant Jessi Appleton about her experience overcoming posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) after receiving MDMA-assisted psychotherapy in a Phase 2 clinical trial sponsored by MAPS.

[mapsnews-deactivated20210210]

Privilege and Safety in the Psychedelic Community

Natalie Lyla Ginsberg writes for Psymposia about her work as MAPS Policy and Advocacy Manager, highlighting the importance of reducing the stigma surrounded psychedelics. “I find myself surrounded by our beautiful and brave psychedelic community in spaces ranging from academic conferences, to the United Nations, to Burning Man,” explains Ginsberg.

[upfromthemud]

Meditation or Medicine?

My path out of trauma and toward some kind of true consciousness has been facilitated through a combination of entheogens- Mdma, lsd, psylocibin, ayahuasca, and a two hour a day meditation practice. (Well I try for two hours).

Everything I have experienced through medicine I could have achieved through meditation. This I am sure of. However it would have required several lifetimes of sitting.  Vipassana practice worked for the Buddha but he was not under the oppressive weight of the 21st century.

When early man walked out of the San Desert 70,000 years ago to populate the Earth they were in search of wisdom. One tribe eventually discovered the technology to explore the stars and the atoms. Another tribe discovered the dhamma breath which has led millions toward enlightenment, still another looked to teacher plants to reveal our interconnectedness and eternal experience. Neither of these discoveries is better than the other. It takes just as much work putting a man on the moon as it does to understand the infinite combination of plant species required to produce yage.

So why would we pit one process against the other when they are actually voices singing in harmony? Maybe each discovery is a piece of a puzzle that when combined can effectively reveal a way out of misery and into a greater knowing. Perhaps that was man’s purpose after all, to explore the far corners of Earth and to bring back all the components necessary to build a mechanism that will save our collective soul before it’s too late. A 70,000 year scavenger hunt with the grand prize being- Awakening.

[philosophybits]

It is a contemptible order of things when one lives in order to eat and drink, instead of eating and drinking in order to live.

Soren Kierkegaard (via philosophybits)

[upfromthemud]

post traumatic growth

Post-traumatic growth can be defined as the positive psychological change that results from the attempt to find new meaning and resolve after a traumatic event (Tedeshi, 2004).

This means that events that shake our very foundation can cause us to get stronger in specific and measurable ways.

[the-red-lotus-blog-deactivated2]

Rather than climbing up a ladder seeking perfection, we are unfolding into wholeness. We are not trying to transcend or vanquish the difficult energies that we consider wrong—the fear, shame, jealousy, anger. This only creates a shadow that fuels our sense of deficiency. Rather, we are learning to turn around and embrace life in all its realness—broken, messy, vivid, alive.

Carl Jung (via the-red-lotus-blog)