Noah Kahan
h
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@theartofmadeline
Not today Justin
bliss lane
Claire Keane
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❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
The Bowery Presents
EXPECTATIONS
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Monterey Bay Aquarium
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Color Me Curious
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@uponyourstars
are you lost, fallen star ?
welcome to my unhinged cozy little side of the internet— my blog / diary hidden from the light of day.
please do note that this is a yandere blog. there will be less than savory topics mentioned here. reader discretion is advised. block if you so please.
continue forward if you wish, fallen star.
hellooo! i know i haven't posted in a hot minute. probably for the next who knows how long.
that's right, i'm taking an indefinite hiatus! i've officially decided to take a break from yanblr. i'm unsure as to if i'll return or not. i have a lot of stuff going on, stuff to plan, and thing(s) i'm hyperfixated on. so my brain capacity is pretty much full and i don't post / write often enough anymore to be using this platform consistently (except for reading fanfics....)
in the scenario that i happen to not return, i wish you all the best. to all the people i've met and friends / mutuals i've made and anons, you're all so incredibly wonderful in your own way and i'm so glad to have met you all. always remember to take care of yourself.
maybe-- just maybe i will post on my side blog. not sure though. and if you'd like to keep in contact or just check in on what i might be up to, i have a twitter: @skullcrushspur
thank you for everything.
No, I’m not jealous.
I just don’t think they should be allowed to look at you. Or breathe near you. Or exist while you’re existing.
Basic stuff.
as soft and kind as i may appear, i am but one image to a double-sided card.
i am no wolf in sheep's clothing; but a cautious dog who hasn't bared its fangs yet out of the instinctive need to protect itself. and as sharp as they may appear, i do not mean to cause harm—i hold no ill will intent.
i only wish to love wholeheartedly. to be loved wholeheartedly. but no matter how soft my bite may be, the sharpness of my fangs remain unchanged.
You are the realest, most real, most relatable, most ironically telepathically connected, iconic, amazing, best person like too best that it's making me think I am inferior, twinning yes twin i am cheering for you on the sidelines while praying that your pookie bear doesn't leave you [I read your side blog religiously like its concerning bad terribly concerning im worried im going crqxy], coolest, best person again, funniest and also the best again, AHH I JUST GOT A SONG THAT IS SO YOU CORE TF?? THE WORLD IS SO RLWEIRD
I am sorry im ranting because I genuinely think you are a dope person my autism is making you a hyperfixation like yes bbg im goijgbto rant inbyou4 asks even if you delete them you aren't getting rid of me...
And I swear im rooting IM. ROOOTINGG. for you with that person OH FUCK I AM.
maybe it's the hopeless romantic in me thinking like ... awhh that's so cute I honestly hope they stay together forever and get married if they believe in that kind of stuff and live old and have headstones next to each other forever and rot and their grandchildren or adopted children or dead pets visit them all the time and place flowers at the Graves and keep it clean and
Okay ill shut up.
Im just an platonically obsessive person, since I am a sexual as duck and also cupioromantic (its SAD SOMEONE SAVE ME FROM THIS CONTRADICTION OF TODTURE AHSHAKRHAHBD)
WHY MUST SPOTIFY GIVE ME ADS DUCKING HELL IM GPING CRAZY..
Anyways bestie and twin in my delusional mind BYE HAVE A NICE DAY WE LOVE AND CHERISH YOUUUUUU MUUAHHH /P
this is going to give you an aneurysm trying to read tbis im so sorry im kind of high right now ik so sorry I think I wouldn't have written this if I wasnt because im usually such a private person but DMAN this shit is making me see this movie in 3d like the imag3s are popping at me..
I need to STOP talking
but I cant..
i can't ahhhhhdhjais
I swear this is parasocialism at it's finest because im coo like that mhmmm I am amazing and cool you should definitely be my friend yes please he my by friend im desperate im going insane ANWAYD
Hye
-- 🙈 [me embarrs3ed]
seeing this entire thing in my inbox and seeing it had a 'read more' button—oh my god. don't care if it's parasocial, i now officially declare us besties and i don't even know your name yet. (also if you can recall, what song came up that was me core? i'm very curious, i wanna know so bad)
i'm so glad to know that people actually look at my side blog pfft. i'm not sure if the person i'm painfully yearning for even likes me in that way. at this point, i'm kind of convinced they just usually act that way with everyone. but i guess we're waiting and seeing.
i get it, i tend to get a little obsessive over my best friends.
ah, that's why i rarely use spotify. i'm an apple music user. i now only use spotify for some podcasts i listen to.
don't worry, reading this was fairly easy. i've seen worse and you were high, so i'll give you a pass. god, i wish i could get high. one day though…
if you wish, feel free to reach out whenever. you seem very cool and silly. mwah mwah! /p
(and side note: you're not inferior, never call yourself such a thing /lh)
my emotions cause me physical pain btw
relationship where you date me and i obsess over you and i obsess over you and i obsess over you and i obsess over you and i obsess over you and i obsess over you and i obsess over you and i obsess over you and i obsess over you and i obsess over you
so what if i lowkey keeping referring to you as my romantic partner in my head even though we're not actually dating yet? are you questioning how close our bond truly is? can an entity not prepare itself in advance??
This one may be a tad bit deranged of me, but...
My body aches where your touch should be on my skin. My heart claws at my ribs, shredding at me from the inside out, when you have your attention elsewhere. Away from me. It’s so lonely without you, so empty and hollow. I would do anything for your approval, your validation, your praise.
If I have to cry for your approval, I’ll cry.
If I have to bleed for it, I’ll bleed.
If I have to be broken for it, then I’ll shatter myself into millions of pieces, just so you'll call me yours.
i need to stop saying i hate my feelings whenever i'm possibly getting romantically attached to someone. i start yearning and my almost immediate thought is, "i hate it. i hate this and i need it to stop."
just so you know, in my head we're always holding hands. so we're never actually apart.
every day i wake up and it’s worse. i remember everything from the day before. how long we talked, what you said, how close you felt, and it makes me want you more than i did yesterday. i don’t do anything else. i don’t care about anything else. i don’t talk to other people because why would i? they’re not you. i don’t want to waste a single second on anyone who isn’t you. i want every hour to be about you, for you, with you. nothing else is worth it. nothing else matters.
𝒜𝓃𝑔𝑒𝓁𝒾𝒸 ʏᴀɴ ᴀꜱᴋ ɢᴀᴍᴇ
thank you for 150+ followers ( ˶ > ᴗ <)
( divider is not mine !! divider creds @priestboy ♡)
angel wing🪽 — are you more sadistic or masochistic when it comes to your darling? or in general if you don’t have one!
salvation — if you have a darling .. what brought you to be so drawn to them? if you don’t have a darling, what brings you to be drawn to someone?
worship — what would you say your love language is? and bonus question, how would you like your darling to show love in return?
ִֶ🪽་༘࿐precious prayer — take this time to discuss ranting about your darling or your loved one! don’t have one? rant about some other fixation or obsession you currently have!
confession ໒꒱ — would you like to confess or would you rather your darling make the first move? how would you confess? how would you like them to confess?
guardian angel — do you tend to stalk or ‘watch over’ your darling? and bonus question, how do you do so?
gracious god — how do you view your darling? an equal? above? a god? worshipper? how do you want them to view you?
cathedral 🪽་༘࿐— do you prefer to worship or be worshipped by your darling?
🪽forgiveness — what’s the worst your darling could do in terms of disrespect or harm? where would you draw the line? what would make you begin to push them away?
group prayer — do you share or discuss being a yan / obsessive behaviors with others? who all knows?
꒰ა religion — do you currently have a darling? do you have your eye on anyone?
sinful — what’s the worst thought you’ve had about your darling (or future / past darling(s) if you don’t currently have one! ) that your willing to share?
I'm glad! Kind of already knew that, from your side blog. But that's irrelevant.
If you are sick, I recommend jasmine tea. Just try it. It helps me all the time, especially since I get the common cold almost all the time. (It gets irritating. Very irritating).
Did you get anything from the store?
I sadly had to go grocery shopping. Adulting was not what I expected it to be. But, I do guess it is fun that I get to do art as my job.
Anyways. You are an kemo? (I'm shorting it since my ADHD brain forgot how to spell it). I've seen some online before. I think it's cute. And i dislike the fact that it is sexualized a lot of the time, since it's completely innocent and a way of self expression. Maybe that's just me.
Sorry for the late reply, had to take a quick shower (totally not TMI)
-- 🎞
i didn't think people actually looked at my side blog pfft. anyway, i need to check if we have any jasmine tea. i'll do so in the morning though if i still feel sick, it's already 12 am. i drank some peppermint tea earlier today, but it didn't help much.. then again, i only drank half of it before i passed out for a couple hours.
mhm, i got a bunch! i got a usagi keychain (from chiikawa), a usagi facemask, lipgloss, a couple drinks like banana milk and ramune, a my melody plushie, and some kind of rose scented powder fragrance? i was curious on what it was so i got it.
wait that's really cool you get to do that as your job. it must be nice! i hope your grocery trip went well and you were able to get everything you needed ^_^
yup yup! (very understandable as someone who also has adhd) luckily i haven't come across anyone who does sexualize it, but it honestly sucks that some people do. i think it's a fun way to express oneself.
don't worry about it! reply whenever you have the time. there's never any rush.
I'm glad you like it. Hopefully your day / work went well.
And thank you. I have quite a lot of social anxiety, so to hear that it wasn't going to be ignored or thought as some creepy ask makes me happy.
Question that is random, but has been in my head for a couple days now:
If you were an animal, what animal would you be? Why? Is there any representations or similarities in personality? Or is it the fact the animal is cute?
Personally, I think I am a Mane Wolf type of person. They look like a mix between a fox and a dog on steroids. But instead it is more skinny and lean. Tall too. I like them for their spunk and intelligence. It's either that or crow. I think the fact they can hold grudges for generations at a time resonates within me somehow.
ah, my day's been alright. i've been a little sick today but i went out shopping with my parents so that's at least a highlight. i hope your day was good too.
hmm if i were an animal, i'd be a dog! more specifically a borzoi. i think they fit my personality. they're quiet, affectionate, independent, smart. they always look so silly and cute too! i haven't mentioned this before on my blog (i figured the information would be irrelevant) but i am a dog kemonomimi. basically it just means i like wearing dog ears and a tail. so my answer to this question came to me almost immediately hehe.
oohh those are super cool choices! i can definitely relate to holding grudges for a long time too. i still hold grudges from elementary school..
I have been stalking your blog for a while. It started out of curiosity, and then I started to take a liking to you. And it's not necessarily romantic, I don't know what it is. So I decided to make this poem in order to catch your attention. Rate it for me. <33 And if I seem awkward, it's because I've been debating on asking this for 10 straight minutes.
I follow every movement like a delicate thread, tracing patterns that seem both close and impossibly far. Each step feels like a quiet promise, fragile and tentative, drawing me nearer while still keeping a gentle distance. In the stillness between moments, your presence lingers — familiar, elusive, like something I both crave and can never fully hold.
Breath mingles with breath, a subtle rhythm that calms and unsettles all at once. The lines between us soften and fade, leaving only a shared space where it’s hard to tell where one ends and the other begins. In this quiet closeness, there’s a bittersweet tenderness, a longing not to possess but simply to be near — to exist alongside in some fragile harmony.
There’s a sadness that hums beneath it all — not from loss, but from the ache of wanting something just beyond reach. And so I remain caught in this delicate balance, where this feeling is a silent song, and hope is the faint light that keeps reaching, always reaching, toward what feels just out of reach.
-- 🎞
oh goodness me. i've never had someone write a poem about me like this. romantic or not, the fact that you still gained the courage to send something so...heartwarming. actually heartwarming may be a drastic understatement, but it's the only word that comes to mind at the moment. either way, your poem genuinely made me smile. this is going to live in the back of my head for ages now (and in my photo library).
i feel like simply rating it would be a superficial way to appreciate what you took the time to write to me. you deserve much more than a rating. know that i am giving you the tightest hug telepathically right now!!
I love how right when I click on your blog my screen goes black and restarts the phone… for no apparent reason. Odd.
Either way, Albedo kinnie hi!
And the blog theme is very cutesy and demure, I like it.
What are your hobbies?
— 🍷
that is strange. does it only do that on my blog?? perhaps i'm some kind of anamoly on tumblr hehe. anyways hello!
also thank youuu, i spent like 2-3 days rebranding it. but it was worth it!! now let's just hope i don't get the sudden urge to change my theme again anytime soon….
i'd say my usual hobbies are gaming, writing, and drawing. though i don't draw as much as i used to. the motivation has just been kind of.. zapped out of me. i also used to be a big reader! i don't have much time to nowadays however. i hope, one day, that i'm able to get back into it.
