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When someone says they're going to Coachella weekend 2

My Future

Ideal:

Real:

When I party on the row again after going out in a major city for most of winter break

When I see the weather forecast for Los Angeles

When I try to clean up my house party after years of having pledges and house cleaners

When I brave the polar vortex to go get booze

When a girl says sororities are anorexic and fake

When I see a job on ConnectSC that could potentially support my binge drinking habits

When most of my tinder matches at home are people I hooked up with in high school

My senior year grades

When my parents tell me we're doing a family activity

When I see Wolf of Wall Street with my parents

When I compare the girls at home to USC girls

When my parents want to play board games but I realize I stole all of the dice for snappa

When I need to get home from the bars but don't have Uber or Campus Cruiser

When someone posts their comm grades on social media

When I'm home when the cleaning lady is working

FRAT ON