A good strategy for being a better person is noticing the little things others do to annoy or hurt you and not doing those things to others.

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@usmc-devil-bitch
A good strategy for being a better person is noticing the little things others do to annoy or hurt you and not doing those things to others.
Trust in Gygax. He can peer into your very soul.
REBLOG WITH YOUR SUN SIGN AND ALIGNMENT!!
Libra, True Neutral (go figure)
virgo, neutral good
scorpio, chaotic neutral
scorpio, chaotic evil
taurus, lawful good
Scorpio, chaotic neutral
libra, true neutral
taurus, chaotic good
gemini, neutral good
capricorn, lawful neutral
aries, chaotic neutral
libra, lawful evil D:
pisces, lawful neutral
scorpio, lawful good
Leo, lawful good
Taurus, neutral good
I want to write an alternative version of Romeo and Juliet where instead of being a little ponce and trying to work things out for himself, Romeo asks his smarter friends what to do about the whole thing and Benvolio and Mercutio come up with the world’s greatest plan:
Marriage of convenience between Juliet and Mercutio.
Think about it.
Juliet’s parents want her to marry into the Prince’s family. Mercutio is a good compromise between no marriage and Paris.
Mercutio probably won’t get his inheritance if he keeps being HELLA FUCKING GAY ALL OVER THE PLACE so a beard is only a benefit to him.
They would probably get along great rolling their eyes at how adorably stupid Romeo is.
Romeo and Benvolio could get a “bachelor pad” right next to Juliet and Mercutio’s house. Every night, Romeo and Mercutio high five as they hop the fence to go bang their one true love.
The second half of the play is just all of them trying to keep up the charade and being “THIS CLOSE” to getting caught all the time. But everything ends nicely because true love conquers all.
Everybody wins. Nobody dies.
Freedom is what you do with what’s been done to you.
Jean-Paul Sartre. Said by Spencer Reid. Season 12 Episode 5. Criminal Minds quote of the day. (via youkicklikeanineyearoldgirl-cm)
I'd very much like to punch a feminist.
I’d never, ever hurt a lady but I’d be happy to punch a feminist. It’d bring me great joy.
I’m 6’2 and weigh 180lbs
ready when you are
Or if you’d like to have some more options….
I’m 6’4” 228 pounds and have 9 years of combined martial arts training and 3 years of being a Line Backer in football. Just in case you are looking for variety.
what about a lady and a feminist. warning, combatives certified soldier.
im tiny, i’m like 5′4 and 130 lbs but u can fight me too
Reblogging for the last one cuz that’s adorable
I’m 5'5", 135, and the single least phyisically intimidating person on earth (seriously, ask @invidtrooper, @mursejesse, @usmc-devil-bitch… only my words are scary) Please hit me. PLLEEEEEAAAASSSEEE. And make sure to leave bruises… stitches or fractured would be awesome too. Because my face will heal, but your criminal record never will. And that means that for the rest of your life, your background checks will accurately reflect what a complete and utter asshole you are, right there in black and white.
I'm 5'2.75" (yes, the .75" matters, it's almost a whole 'nother inch), 125 lbs. I'm also a United States Marine. Come at me, bro. You can spend the rest of your days crying about how you got your ass kicked by a girl. Fucking douchebag.
my moons II
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This judge had exactly the right reaction to the shameful way nonviolent prisoners are treated in US jails
A woman was denied pants or tampons after being arrested for not completing a diversion course that was part of her sentencing from a shoplifting charge. But see how the judge reacts when she finds out that the prisoner’s humiliating treatment is apparently routine.
Gifs: Raw Leak
WATCH THE VIDEO
Our corrections system is fucked up.
The thing about “manspreading” is that it’s totally a thing. The fact that a lot of dudes are out here trying to justify it is proof that it’s a real thing. But it’s really rude. There is no denying it. You get these guys over here saying they have to because of some comfort issue having to do with their balls or whatever, but here’s the thing about public transportation, it’s not about comfort.
People don’t ride the bus or subway to be comfortable, they ride it to get to work, or school, or home, or wherever the fuck they have to be that day. If was suppposed to be comfortable, then there would be more than a quarter inch of fucking cushion on those seats.
“But I need to be comfortable!“
No, you fucking don’t! The bus is meant to get as many people as possible from point A to point B. They can’t do that if you’re taking up more than one seat. I get it though, if you were at home or the only passenger in the backseat of a personal vehicle, fucking do it dude. Take up as much space as you want. Spread those limbs, my little starfish! But the bus is not yours. The subway is not yours.
It is a shared space. That doesn’t mean take up as much of it as you can for yourself, that means take what you need. What you NEED. That’s why I take up only one seat. Not one seat and some of the seat next me because of my junk. And if I can’t, I stand up. Standing up is totally an option on public transportation and is literally way better than sitting down anyway. In my opinion, at least. My ass doesn’t hurt, I don’t have strangers crotches in my face, I feel like I’m in a gum commercial for whatever reason, it’s awesome.
Also, some woman have balls, and you never catch them manspreading. Like what the fuck is your excuse, you greedy shit?
yo have you ever asked them nicely if they could move their legs so that you can sit down?
Manslation: I’m here to save the day!!! It surely never would have occurred to little old you to do the completely fucking obvious thing that you try all the time without success. It meant a lot to me to save you the trouble of having to do all that super hard thinking! Someone oughta bake me a cake.
Okay so it kinda is about comfort though? Male pelvises are typically shaped in such a way that putting their legs together is actually difficult, not just uncomfortable. Not to mention most men have, you know, a penis and testes which are pretty fragile and sensitive so squeezing their legs together isn’t an option.
And I’m an intersex woman jsyk before you come at me with that “manslation!!!” bullshit.
Manslation (cis male sexual characteristics and/or gender identity not required): I’m going to hop into a thread a thousand years late to tell you one more time why men’s balls are more important than you. Ummm didn’t you ever think About CIS MEN’S BALLS? BALLS. DiD u knoW THAT CIS MEN HAve THEM???? AND THEY MUST BE OPTIMALLY COMFORTABLE AT ALL TIMES
yaaaaasssss bb!!!!!!! yall kNOW i luv me some cishet white boy balss!! cant get enuf of those balls! gotta eat em up!! give me those semen !! !1
seriously bitch, did you really try to “manslate” me? do you know how many times my “masculine” physical characteristics have been used against me and youre gonna come in here like The Almighty Fenemist™
bitch go fuck yourself.
Listen, lady, if you thought I was going to award you Cleverest Gal 2016 for being the thousandth person to smugly remind me that “most men have, you know, a penis and testes” as though I just hatched out of an egg fully formed 45 minutes ago, you were not correct about that.
You rolled up to a blog called the Manslator, with over a thousand posts dedicated to doing this exact thing, which I invented, and wrote an entire FAQ about (which, handily, explains that manslating has nothing to do with the identity of the person speaking and everything to do with the patriarchal/male-centered content of their speech), and thought I was going to crawl up your ass with gratitude for the free condescending biology lesson. This is a lot like pulling up in the McDonald’s drive-thru and being absolutely infuriated and personally insulted that they won’t serve you a soft taco supreme.
Weirdly I know lots of guys who manage to not sprawl and none of them seem to have an issue – they aren’t writhing in pain and they clearly have no lasting damage to their balls, as I’ve seen their offspring… some of which has been in my personal uterus.
Also, why do men feel that sitting position is a binary? I mean, u dont have to squeeze your legs together with all your might OR spread them into a fucking split. You really could just plant them hip distance apart. Which if that’s SOOOOO painful for you, then please explain the guys I see at the gym doing lat pulldowns, or hamstring curld or leg extensions or a million other sitting exercises where the machine requires you sit with your legs hip distance apart…?
I would also point out to those tools that men used to sit with their legs crossed. So it obviously wasn't an issue then and it's not like the size of male human testicles has dramatically increased in a few centuries.
We could prevent a zombie apocalypse by tying people’s shoes together before we bury them
What I do in therapy
Oh my god. This is my life all over.
I’m just dying while thinking about a hotel employee calmly Googling “How to fold a towel in the shape of an elephant,” and then going out to buy eye stickers.
I think these would guarantee return bookings. Loving the elephant.
I worked in a hotel for a year. Hotel staff LOVE silly requests because otherwise our job is just mundane. It gives the front desk a chance to do something creative.
aaaa this is so lovely
I'm fairly certainly this would only work at upscale hotels, but this is fucking hilariously awesome!
what is going on in this world 😡 #JesseRomero
…something else happened in the five min I was gone UGH
I feel like this is never going to stop.
High-functioning anxiety sounds like…
You’re not good enough. You’re a bad friend. You’re not good at your job. You’re wasting time. You’re a waste of time. Your boyfriend doesn’t love you. You’re so needy. What are you doing with yourself? Why would you say that? What if they hate it? Why can’t you have your shit together? You’re going to get anxious and because you’re going to get anxious, you’re going to mess everything up. You’re a fraud. Just good at faking it. You’re letting everybody down. No one here likes you.
All the while, it appears perfectly calm.
It’s always looking for the next outlet, something to channel the never-ending energy. Writing. Running. List-making. Mindless tasks (whatever keeps you busy). Doing jumping jacks in the kitchen. Dancing in the living room, pretending it’s for fun, when really it’s a choreographed routine of desperation, trying to tire out the thoughts stuck in your head.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen it written out as if it were describing me exactly.
During the Bubonic Plague, doctors wore these bird-like masks to avoid becoming sick. They would fill the beaks with spices and rose petals, so they wouldn’t have to smell the rotting bodies.
A theory during the Bubonic Plague was that the plague was caused by evil spirits. To scare the spirits away, the masks were intentionally designed to be creepy.
Mission fucking accomplished
Okay so I love this but it doesn’t cover the half of why the design is awesome and actually borders on making sense.
It wasn’t just that they didn’t want to smell the infected and dead, they thought it was crucial to protecting themselves. They had no way of knowing about what actually caused the plague, and so one of the other theories was that the smell of the infected all by itself was evil and could transmit the plague. So not only would they fill their masks with aromatic herbs and flowers, they would also burn fires in public areas, so that the smell of the smoke would “clear the air”. This all related to the miasma theory of contagion, which was one of the major theories out there until the 19th century. And it makes sense, in a way. Plague victims smelled awful, and there’s a general correlation between horrible septic smells and getting horribly sick if you’re around what causes them for too long.
You can see now that we’ve got two different theories as to what caused the plague that were worked into the design. That’s because the whole thing was an attempt by the doctors to cover as many bases as they could think of, and we’re still not done.
The glass eyepieces. They were either darkened or red, not something you generally want to have to contend with when examining patients. But the plague might be spread by eye contact via the evil eye, so best to ward that off too.
The illustration shows a doctor holding a stick. This was an examination tool, that helped the doctors keep some distance between themselves and the infected. They already had gloves on, but the extra level of separation was apparently deemed necessary. You could even take a pulse with it. Or keep people the fuck away from you, which was apparently a documented use.
Finally, the robe. It’s not just to look fancy, the cloth was waxed, as were all of the rest of their clothes. What’s one of the properties of wax? Water-based fluids aren’t absorbed by it. This was the closest you could get to a sterile, fully protecting garment back then. Because at least one person along the line was smart enough to think “Gee, I’d really rather not have the stuff coming out of those weeping sores anywhere on my person”.
So between all of these there’s a real sense that a lot of real thought was put into making sure the doctors were protected, even if they couldn’t exactly be sure from what. They worked with what information they had. And frankly, it’s a great design given what was available! You limit exposure to aspirated liquids, limit exposure to contaminated liquids already present, you limit contact with the infected. You also don’t give fleas any really good place to hop onto. That’s actually useful.
Beyond that, there were contracts the doctors would sign before they even got near a patient. They were to be under quarantine themselves, they wouldn’t treat patients without a custodian monitoring them and helping when something had to be physically contacted, and they would not treat non-plague patients for the duration. There was an actual system in place by the time the plague doctors really became a thing to make sure they didn’t infect anyone either.
These guys were the product of the scientific process at work, and the scientific process made a bitchin’ proto-hazmat suit. And containment protocols!
For the commentary.
Oh my god, I knew it made sense by their understanding, but I never knew it made sense by modern scientific standards, too.
Inner history nerd is SO FUCKING SQUEEFUL at this
There’s religious people going door to door to convince atheists to become religious. Imagine how much controversy there would be if the roles were switched.
Let’s do something. Here’s a starter kit with some required reading. (Let me rephrase. Here is a love letter to my white friends, “color-blind” acquaintances, anyone who is all bottled up in wide-eyed silence right now, and of course, myself.) To find our humanity and do *something* instead of hand-wringing, Facebook likes, and avoidance. Racism can’t solve itself. We have to do it. 1. Stop being afraid. Afraid of conversation. Afraid of language. Afraid of mucking up. Afraid of people. Afraid of words. Words like, “racism” or “black” or “brown” or “queer” or “genocide.” These are words. People are being murdered and cannot afford fear of words. 2. Familiarize yourself with The Counted website and keep it bookmarked. When obstinate folks call for “facts,” The Guardian has you covered. (And if you yourself aren’t aghast by these *facts*, we need to have a chat. Truly.) 3. Privilege. We have it. Start here and then let’s have a talk. 4. Do the work. On your own. You have a big brain, use it. Here’s a lovingly curated starter list. (Note, “ally” can be a trick term. Don’t self-proclaim. Just do the work. You don’t get praise for being a decent person.) 5. PTSD is real. (Good-reader tip: Read the articles within the article. So much to know.) 6. Reparations. 7. Introspect. And then introspect more. 8. Staying tuned. http://www.blackgirldangerous.org/ http://verysmartbrothas.com/ http://blavity.com/ http://www.thefeministwire.com/ http://blacknerdproblems.com/ 9. The long haul: essentials. Citizen by Claudia Rankine Between the World and Me by Ta-Nehisi Coates The New Jim Crow by Michelle Alexander Women Race and Class by Angela Davis Sister Outsider: Essays & Speeches by Audre Lorde The Fire Next Time by James Baldwin The Souls of Black Folk by W.E.B. Du Bois
**This comes with gratitude to all the friends/acquaintances who have themselves offered me the gifts of their time and information.** :::::::::::::::::::::::::Amended::::::::::::::::::::::::: * Express your rage about Alton Sterling to LA Governor Edwards. Remember, no need to write a long letter if you don’t have the words/wherewithal. Simply this can suffice: #AltonSterling #BlackLivesMatter * Express your rage about Philando Castile to MN Governor Dayton. Remember, no need to write a long letter if you don’t have the words/wherewithal. Simply this can suffice: #PhilandoCastile #BlackLivesMatter
@usmc-devil-bitch what do you think of this list?
Don't tell black people how they should feel or how they should struggle to try to change the current situation. Also, if you don't have any ideas or suggestions for alternatives, don't bother trying to tell us about how what we're doing with crisis of us dying in the streets won't work . We've tried everything else. Riots are the cries of those who have been marginalized, ignored, dismissed, exploited, and oppressed. We're frustrated, and rightfully so. We're scared. I can't explain the fear i feel when I see a police car. I could be driving perfectly, 5 miles under the speed limit and I'd still be scared. Especially in an area with which I am unfamiliar. Is today the day? I'm scared for me. I'm scared for my child. I desperately wanted to have a boy, and was kind of sad when I found out I wasn't. But I'm glad I didn't. My fear for my child would be orders of magnitude higher because black men are seen as more threatening. Even black children are thought to be an average of 4 or 5 years older than they actually are (as with Tamir Rice. He was 12. But to the cops he supposedly looked 20)
In highschool if someone finishes a test way before anyone else they knew their shit. In university if someone finishes a test before everyone else, they didn’t know anything.