Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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@vainslaughter
We said the winter would kill everything but us. We proved to ourselves that we could be wrong more often than right. You are the hardest thing I’ve ever tried to love. You are a thing that settles where the bones bend and keeps me awake at night.
IMMORTALITY AND GROWING PAINS AND YOU ( s.b.l. )
ruinous . ♡ * infonavi .
tremble up her spine, back arching inwards and shoulders hitching. her hands flew back, “ stop it! what do you even want? ”
( it tickled. )
tomie smiles & the single finger turns into a hand, turns into two, sliding up vera’s jaw, cupping her face. it’s cruel, how soft tomie’s touch is. crueler, how she only ever uses it for her brand of slow violence. “ does no one ever touch you, vera ? ” her thumbs stroke circles into vera’s cheekbones. “ are you so LONELY ? so STARVED ? ”
starter. * @infonavi
runs her finger up the curve of vera’s neck, nails the softest bite.
ruinous . ♡ * inflictsagony .
❛ If you wanted a closer look, just ask—- the answer is NO but you can have the satisfaction of hearing it. ❜
as if she hasn’t heard him, tomie leans in closer anyways, finger at her jaw, smile knife thin. “ even if i ask NICELY ? ah, but it’s so INTERESTING ... ”
my favorite thing will always be ppl overestimating tomie bc she has that otherworldly air about her that naturally intimidates but really she’ll go down with a slap and stay there
ruinous . ♡ * chosenrite .
he can almost pinpoint the entrance wound of her words but there’s no exit — just a stinging in his stomach almost physical . humour , he thinks , that’ll save him , best not show her satisfaction by being upset .
“S’that so. Well, beats tabloid rumours, I guess. Makes you feel important, knowing there’s people who wanna drag you down so much. Cowardly’s a new one.” he shifted his shoulders to dispel a nonexistent ache . “At least they’re calling me king now.”
ah, but the word COWARDLY sounded so familiar on their tongues, their rotten scripture, worship more to the gods & not the boy beneath. funny how godhood works. all that glory & where does it go ? how long until it burns ? how long until he’s lighting his own funeral pyre ?
tomie shrugs & she’d look almost apologetic if only she’s capable of half a kindness. it’s a mockery to even try but that’s why she does.
“ –––– oh. they didn’t REALLY call you that ––– i suppose i was being a little KIND in including the KING part. ” nothing kind at all in the sweep of her gaze over him, up & down, fingers ghosting over the soft wound of her mouth. the corner twitches. her chuckle seems like an afterthought. “ if it TRULY makes your feel important when others drag you down, you must feel like you’re the WORLD & then some. ”
i was/everywhere, like a god/or a virus & i was everything/required of me & i was anything/but tame/& so, so long from then/i stand in the deepest part of night/singing recklessly, calling/what must feast/ to feast.
Danez Smith, from “recklessly,” published in Vinyl (via mythaelogy)
ruinous . ♡ * rousseure .
‘ … I TOLD YOU i’d be busy with finals, and this class i really, really can’t afford to fail again, you know? ’ she tries to measure her words, ends up all mumbles. tomie only really hears what she wants to hear, anyway. it’s pointless to explain herself. hands stained with neon pinks and oranges take gentle hold of tomie’s, unwrapping her own body. ‘ i’m sorry, babe… maybe i can put on a movie for you? and you can lay your head on my legs, and i can play with your hair a little, too. how does that sound? nice? ’
“ sounds TERRIBLE, ” tomie spits.
the way she tears herself from anna’s grasp is over dramatic & needless & TOXIC , turning her back to anna, CRUEL , looking back over her shoulder with a glare & so very TOMIE , this refusal, this acid dripped spite. she’ll have everything as she wants it or not at all. give her nothing & she’ll tear your world to grab it.
“ i thought you were a GOOD girlfriend, anna. thought you CARED about me but ––– you’re putting THIS ? over me ? ” now comes the lowered gaze, the wavering voice, quivering lips. she does it right, does it perfectly, her victimizing ; wears it better than a dress, silk on her skin. tomie digs into her bottom lip. digs further into anna. “ we haven’t been able to spend ANY time together at all because you’ve been so BUSY. that HURTS, you know ? ”
ruinous . ♡ * conseille .
a comparison to a puppy could never offend yerin – nor would she ever accuse tomie of saying something intentionally cruel – so it’s pure SHEEPISHNESS that reddens her response. ❝ does she – !! ❞ she’s about to ask if tomie believes yuuko’s noticed her feelings, but she stops to wonder if it would be better to just deny it. it seems wrong, somehow, to be associated with someone as incredible as yuuko in that way; yerin would hate to embarrass her or burden her with a silly crush.
but she can’t lie either. maybe tomie could help her. ❝ do you think she knows ? ❞
yerin’s petal soaked innocence twists the ugliness in tomie’s guts, stirring it to restlessness. disgust & malice flashing in her eyes before she closes them, pursing her lips & pretending contemplation on yerin’s question. slow, she tells herself, nails plucking at skin. it’s a slow game that she pulled them into. steps must be taken. she can’t have yerin’s heart on the floor without making the cuts.
“ i ... believe she MIGHT, ” tomie drawls, back to doe eyes, gaze fluttering around the room. she catches sight of yuuko at the food tables, chatting with ella & interesting thing that happens: yuuko glances their way & , mouth still moving in conversation, passes over tomie & lingers to her left. looks at yerin up at down before she’s back to giving ella her full attention, just like that, glance as fleeting as a trick of the light.
tomie’s smirk is a slow crawl. flicks into an apologetic smile when she turns to yerin, dripping in pity. “ BUT ... she might be pretending NOT to, you know ? for your sake. doesn’t want to make things AWKWARD because she may not feel the same. she’s sweet, for wanting to let you down easy, isn’t she ? ”
ruinous . ♡ * spiragal .
it’s precisely because she’s a hero-in-training that she cannot ignore dubious looks — often a telltale sign of something nefarious in the works . but rather than press the subject , nejire turns her head forward &. walks with the same bounce in her step . if they’re up to something , there’s no need to draw suspicion . ❛ hm … chocolate cake , maybe ? or a crepe ? ❜ she muses out loud , finger on her chin in faux contemplation . ❛ hey hey , kawakami-san , what are you getting ? ❜
“ HMMM. might get some grilled squid. or sashimi. the food stalls around here don’t sell much quality stuff, do they ? ” the footsteps behind them start picking up speed. reiko's eyes shadow over for a blink & it must be a trick of the light, that look, slasher gaze –––– then, she’s merely rolling her eyes & quickening her pace by a hair. what she’s said before remains true, but damned if reiko’s letting them BREATHE down her back. disgusting to even think about. she shudders.
here is a body. now take it apart.
the light through the window, the incense burning on the desk, the shoes and the books in the piles in the corner. all this should change something. all this should make it easier.
here is a body. now do as it says.
here is a body. now make it hurt.
the hand at the throat, the hand at the chest, the hand at the thigh. still the light through the window. still the incense, the slow burning. still the promise: acts of violence made easy.
and still, before that, the desire.
here is my body now take it apart please.
MCP: THE POET AS A HISTORY OF PRIOR INTIMACIES.
two small hcs:
one. tomie has no natural scent. not even when she bleeds, never when she rots. if you smell anything from her, it’s likely perfume or your imagination.
two. different tomies will have their mole in different places. often it’ll be under her left eye but there are plenty with a mole someplace else.
ruinous . ♡ * spiragal .
❛ hm … hey hey , kawakami - san , listen to this ! those two guys have been following us for a while . ❜ tomie is the type to attract all sorts of attention , especially of the male variety . for one who demands attention , thoughts of envy briefly flicker in nejire’s mind . but they dissipate when she sees their expression : distraught , desperate , destructive . definitely not the type of attention nejire wants , for sure ! tomie must have some aura that drives men crazy or something ! ❛ hey hey , are you listening ? they’re really creepy ! i don’t like them one bit ! ❜
“ just IGNORE them, nejire. ” malice & danger follows reiko like her own shadow –––– she’d be a fool to pay it any attention. what do two heroes in training have to worry about some guys giving them looks ? reiko scoffs away nejire’s comments. “ they’re just bugs. beneath us. we have more important things to think about ––– like what kind of snacks we’re going to get ! ”
hey there ! i’m hiyori &. this is a new nejire hado roleplayer looking for people to annoy incessantly :^) like / reblog this if you’re interested in interacting ? thanks a lot !
ruinous . ♡ * seireke .
“heeeeehhhhh tomie-chan, that’s not right! you should talk to them LOTS!! stupid people are GREAT, they bring all the good ideas and funny-funny stories! history is made up of stupid people who do all sorts of things! THE WORLD now TOO! because! BECAUSE! stupidity! is! POWER!”
& there mako goes, proving her point. tomie takes a second to collect herself, eyes fluttering closed. inhale. now let it out. her eyes snap open, a dark cut across her face. “ mako--chan. ” for all the acid she spits, tomie coats her words sweetly. she finds it makes things harder to swallow, the ugly dressed so pretty. “ i was talking about YOU. ”
♡. @amoureax / MEME. ( accepting )
a girl made of rot & ruin won’t notice when it surrounds her. tomie looks around the antique store, mouth pinched only at the gaudiness of it all, all this thrown up fools gold. masks look at her & she stares back. she’s never lost a staring contest.
“ so ? ” she says without looking away, “ what do you think, ann ? something to be found here that’s to makoto’s taste ? ”
♡. @seireke
“ ––––– OH. sorry, but i don’t like talking to stupid people. ”
