❱ 𝐀𝐌𝐎𝐒 •ﻌ• | THEY / THEM | 18+ auDHD | mean 𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐛𝐢𝐚𝐧 ⭑ | SLAVIC | ☆ feel free to talk to me !
• this blog is purely for me to rant, ramble and occasionally write drabbles/headcanons `⎚⩊⎚´ -✧ || i’ve got autism (clearly) so yes everything is very deep and analytical to me
𝐂𝐔𝐑𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐇𝐘𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐅𝐈𝐗𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍(𝐒): honkai star rail, obey me, genshin impact
𝐜𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐤 “𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞” 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 !
𝐃𝐎 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓 (๑•́₋•̩̥̀๑)
general dni criteria | zionists | under 18 (just in private dms, otherwise i don’t mind) | k*eluc/y*eyato/itt*sara/r*binhill/aglan*xa/ph*irene shippers | dark shippers/pro shippers (i understand what it means, but this term is too loosely used in tandem with dark shipping so i won’t tolerate it) | cnc/dubcon consumers, to me it’s just the romanticism of rape and i have zero respect for you | incest/stepcest writers | l&ds fans
𝐁𝐄𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐅𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖 𐔌՞. .՞𐦯
intentional lowercase in all my posts | i hate all straight ships, they make me uncomfortable | diagnosed with audhd (just means i talk way too much) | a lot of my posts are just rambles/essays, i’m an english literature nerd so i love reading subtext | kinkshaming is my kink
𝐅𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐎𝐌𝐒 ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧
genshin impact | honkai star rail | honkai impact 3rd | baldur’s gate 3 | obey me shall we date | any and most horror games (fnaf, poppy playtime, fran bow etc) | vocaloid | jjk | black butler | tgcf | mdzs | svsss | ohshc | tbhk | sanrio | sk8 | bsd | sailor moon (+ a lot of magical girl animes) | seraph of the end | mob psycho | monster high | spider man | arcane | date everything | castlevania | hannibal | analog horror | musicals (epic, hamilton, hadestown, heathers, legally blonde etc)
𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ˆ𐃷ˆ
honkai star rail
honkai star rail: the importance of implication, queer subtext and dynamics
aglaea’s characterisation / ramble
aventurine character analysis (with aventio)
genshin impact
nod krai’s slavic/baltic name references
natlan’s character design overview/critique
the problem with natlan / sumeru (colourism/racism)
obey me shall we date
my personal take om! sorcerer society
failed replaced!MC au - part one
failed replaced!MC au - part two
unanswered questions in obey me (nightbringer)
my biggest obey me (fandom/writing) icks
rant about my favourite obey me characters
things every obey me player would like
baldur’s gate 3
baldur’s gate 3 relationship with the fandom
love and deepspace
love and deepspace fandom critique
date everything
houseowner that starts dressing less sexy
miscellaneous
“annoying gays” aren’t the problem / the problem with straight self-entitlement
you're out here writing manifestos but your entire critique reads like a Reddit highlights reel you copy-pasted for notes. but here's the real contradiction: you claim the issue is objectification yet you can't type two sentences without hurling misogynistic slurs. you're just mad the 'bait' isn't catered to your specific brand of snobbery. you reduce female characters to sexual punchlines in your own rants, then pat yourself on the back for Having Eyes That See.'
are you gonna give an example or are you gonna give me your chatgpt feminist manifesto LMAO
came to this blog and it does not disappoint lol it's genuinely pathetic to fake a praise ask just to keep your 5 notes rolling. same buzzwords, same fake outrage, same edgelord energy. nobody talks like this unironically except the person farming validation from their own echo chamber. pretending strangers are sliding into your asks to hype you up is just sad. we both know you're still gonna pull on the banner. log off and take your meds. the only riot happening is in your drafts.
fake a praise ask ?? 😭 please get off the internet for once and speak with real human beings, i cannot imagine being this pressed because i offended your waifu loli game LMAOOO
look at how many people were outside today…what have you been doing
THANKYOU for speaking the truth about the new hoyo trailer!!
i think people have gone insane, what's in the water??? why are people celebrating, these designs are such a massive letdown?
and there's not a single woman who's covered up for the cold, where are all the riots and wars we said we were going to have???? I'm so disappointed i think I'm going to have to skip the entire nation omfg. and all I'm gonna hear is "complain impact" because I have eyes that see?? and i don't immediately eat up goonbait?? i think we need to shoot mr hoyo
even the reddit is complaining about how boring the cryo archon’s design especially looks. everyone is just generic ice characters from a cold region. they’ve got zero personality, silhouette or interest. these characters have no identity of their own apart from nitpicked stereotypical archetypes from anime (brooding emo, maid, mystical woman etc). there’s also hardly any russian/slavic inspiration in any of the designs.
100% as soon as the hype dies down and yall stop cumming over the most mediocre men because you’re starved, they’ll start realising how boring the entire region looks
i really need hoyo players to engage in video games outside of the gacha anime RPG genre
why am i seeing people fiddling their holes over the most mediocre designs in hoyo history. one of them is just an emo guy with long hair. the rest are sloppy and identical to the same cliches of all the other characters. the tsaritsa’s design is lacklustre and boring. all the male characters are covered while all the women have their boobs and thighs out. get real.
please for the love of god, play some actual video games. you’ll realise just how much you’re getting cheated out of when it comes to design, execution, and gameplay.
player since 1.0 🫶 you’re incapable of taking criticism for a game because the only things you play are gachaslop RPGs with little to no substance, go enjoy some actual gameplay for once 💗
i really need hoyo players to engage in video games outside of the gacha anime RPG genre
why am i seeing people fiddling their holes over the most mediocre designs in hoyo history. one of them is just an emo guy with long hair. the rest are sloppy and identical to the same cliches of all the other characters. the tsaritsa’s design is lacklustre and boring. all the male characters are covered while all the women have their boobs and thighs out. get real.
please for the love of god, play some actual video games. you’ll realise just how much you’re getting cheated out of when it comes to design, execution, and gameplay.
i say “canonically” but this is me more so interpreting the moments before the MC gets given the option to kiss the brothers to kind of “verify” their romantic feelings.
spoilers for main game, i’ll do nightbringer next a lil later!
ORIGINAL GAME
MAMMON — Lesson 4
By this point you’ve had that TSL movie marathon and made your pact, and MC has options to be more outwardly teasing with him (he’s also revealed the reason he gets called up to the human world so often by witches, despite none of his other brothers knowing). Beel especially, in the hard mode story, talks about how Mammon must really like MC—obviously he tries to deny it, but he’s deliriously happy when Beel suggests that the MC might like him back.
Cute mention: next lesson he gets incredibly jealous that MC has to stay in Beel’s room instead of his
BEEL — Lesson 6
By this point we’ve saved him and Luke from Lucifer’s wrath, have learnt about his past with Lilith and Belphie, we also make a pact with him (despite his small hesitation). It doesn’t really feel like he LIKE likes us at this point? Feels a tad bit more like trust/respect, however he does explicitly ask MC to hold his hand and blushes about it, so I think he’s just a little slower at coming to terms with the fact what he’s feeling is romantic.
ASMO — Lesson 8
He takes a huge interest in MC after the whole underground labyrinth debacle, where Solomon gives MC some power and they call Asmo down to save them from the snake; he very excitedly squeals about how Solomon has never been able to pull that much power out of him before. Kinda tricky to decipher whether it’s all just typical Asmo charm and teasing that he does all the time, or a genuine love.
Lesson 13 more or less confirms that he does love MC romantically (and therefore has the whole time).
SATAN — Lesson 12
Finished that Grisella storyline with the whole switching bodies shenanigans with Lucifer, we obviously grow extremely close to him, and MC constantly comforts him. Not really obvious that his likeness/gratitude toward MC is romantic, but I think that’s just a reflection of Satan’s character.
LUCIFER — Lesson 11/12
Lucifer is a tad more complicated, because it’s evident that he’s been somewhat romantically interested in the MC for quite a bit after he you know…threatened and nearly killed them. He’s obviously quite entranced by their boldness and love for the brothers. Before Belphie shows up and ruins things, he does nearly admit that he likes/loves MC.
BELPHIE — Lesson 18
He kills us, everyone finds out we’re Lilith’s distant descendant…and he suddenly becomes all nice and sweet with us. But, I think it’s only after a little later when MC helps Belphie reconcile with his brothers does he let himself feel the actual romantic connection between him and MC.
LEVI — Lesson ???
Levi was literally impossible for me to figure out LMAO, every interaction between us and him is extremely friendly and platonic, and he never refers to us as anything but a good friend. Unlike characters like Mammon and Asmo who feel romantically betrayed when they find MC has been making pacts with them for Belphie, Levi basically just calls you a shit friend. It’s only really after you kiss him when he’s mopey about you leaving that it clicks for him.
i absolutely love how nikki is nearly always bathed in shadow (whether it’s fully in the dark or with a single light behind her with her as the faceless darkness). she’s quite literally become a shadow of her former self. no autonomy, no personal thoughts or emotions, just a carved image of what bear desired.
On the contrary I think that Freaky Nikki is a fully realized character in her own right who we see have a psychotic breakdown followed by an existential/identity crisis after her worst fears (Bear not reciprocating her love) are confirmed.
And she is extremely autonomous. She basically spends the second act of the movie doing exactly the opposite of what Bear wants despite her best efforts to the contrary. She is so autonomous the audience is freaked out whenever she isn't in frame because we are as afraid of what she is doing off-camera as what she would be doing on-camera.
And ultimately Freaky Nikki's own self and personhood got in the way of what Bear getting what he wanted.
i think that’s a fair interpretation, but personally, there is nothing in her pursuit that feels like autonomy. she was created with the intention to love and obsess over bear, not with the intention to obey and submit to his every word. she does everything with the intention to be his one and only, because that’s what she was created for, not because she wants to; because her purpose is bear. the identity crisis definitely could be a flicker to her personhood, but the entity has no emotion or meaning aside from helplessness that the one person she’s intended to love, doesn’t feel the same way.
everything about the entity is intrinsically tied to her ‘love’ for him because it’s her duty. she doesn’t care who stands in the way, even if it is bear, because that’s not what he wished for. he didn’t wish for an equal partner, he wished for the obsession. she tries her best to do what bear wants and desires because, once again, that’s her purpose. she disobeys because she has to keep his attention and love for her existence to be fulfilled.
i absolutely love how nikki is nearly always bathed in shadow (whether it’s fully in the dark or with a single light behind her with her as the faceless darkness). she’s quite literally become a shadow of her former self. no autonomy, no personal thoughts or emotions, just a carved image of what bear desired.
RERIR WAS NOT A WELL WRITTEN VILLAIN.(character analysis).
𖤓 cw. story spoilers for nod krai!!
𖤓 preface: you can like rerir, i know none of this is deep, i just enjoy analysing characters and writing because it’s fun!
FEEL FREE TO SKIP TO LAST HEADER TO READ RERIR ANALYSIS, I YAP A LOT LOL
☾ ⋆ WHAT MAKES A GOOD VILLAIN?
A good villain is, technically, entirely subjective. What I personally believe makes a good villain, can be completely different from what you consider a good villain. However, that is not to say there isn’t a set foundation that, while not necessarily needing to be followed closely, paves way for a villain that is impactful.
First, we have to understand the difference between a villain and an antagonist. Antagonists do not have to be bad people (immoral), they simply have to go against the protagonist in a way that makes you empathise with the MC more. They are there to provide tension and conflict, not necessarily strife and violence.
Villains, on the other hand, are either amoral (indifferent/being without moral principles) or immoral (directly going against known morals). They use underhanded tactics, lie, cheat, steal, kill etc. That does not mean that all villains are malevolent monsters; sometimes they can be the only people that see the 'true' side of a conflict, but their methods and actions are destructive and dangerous.
For this circumstance, I’m going to be specifically referring to villains that are created with the intention of being ‘irredeemable’ antagonists. People who do heinous acts for entirely heinous and or selfish causes without care about the damage or harm, and go directly against the main protagonist.
With that in mind, to make an irredeemable villain, they must have these qualities:
Be a foil to the protagonist; they have to be a direct antithesis to whatever the main character stands for and the actions that they take. For example, the crab (Tamatoa) from Moana, contrasts Moana’s character. He is selfish and greedy, and is blinded by luxuries of gold: while Moana consistently chooses her people, nature, generosity, and love. More classically, Macbeth and Macduff; while Macbeth is a King of entirely false and facetious beginnings, and whose character relies on deception, Macduff is deliberately naïve, trusting, and a righteous ruler according to nature.
The story must not try and convince you of the villain’s ability to change; an irredeemable villain is supposed to be dogmatic. Their morals are dormant, actions are selfish and often vile. This does not mean these characters do not do things because they are forced, or because they have a tragic backstory, but the important distinction is that, despite it all, they continue the cycle of violence and sacrifice without care for consequence. Some examples being AM (I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream), an Ai filled with absolute contempt for humanity and tortures a select few for eternity; and, Jack Horner (Puss in Boots: The Last Wish), a comedic villain who’s purely evil because of unjustified greed.
☾ ⋆ PROS OF RERIR’S CHARACTER
Now, I do not think Rerir was made with intention of being irredeemable. Not because of some exemplar, complex writing, but because they had every intention of trivialising his crimes for a weak plotline. Which is pathetic.
But this is supposed to be about his positives, so let us go over that first.
His entire backstory is disgustingly evil; an inhuman, violent, and callous sinner who rips apart realms searching selfishly for a way to meet his old lover; a man who brutally committed a genocide against a race of people because of their blood, due to being told to by a higher persons. His bloodshed was not limited to the elderly, to adults, or even teens; but stretched onto children too. Sounds dangerously familiar, doesn’t it? It is that grotesque mirroring of real world horrors that makes him so perfectly vile.
That entire sequence of us going through Rerir’s memories, watching as the age lowers from twenties to a single digit? Genuinely, absolutely haunting. To top it off, we even get a glimpse of him speaking to one of these victims; a child who pleads for mercy, wherein Rerir laughs in his face. That action alone should prove a detachment of pity and morality from Rerir as a character, in turn, then, painting him as a true, evil and irredeemable villain.
☾ ⋆ WHY HE IS (GENERALLY) NOT WELL WRITTEN
For some bizarre, disgusting, and completely unjustified reason, they spend half of the Nod Krai quest trying to coddle his crimes. They seriously, and unabashedly attempt to pull the “but he was just a man who was simply following orders” line, despite the fact that he allowed one Crimson Moon descendant to escape AFTER finding out that Tholindis, his girlfriend, was also a descendant. He had the capacity of mercy, but decided against it until a COMPLETELY selfish guilt moved him ONCE.
What frustrates me even more, is that literally no-one in the cast is outraged by this shit? This man MURDERED CHILDREN?? He committed a whole GENOCIDE against a race?? And not one single person in that cast, from Varka who is supposed to be a purveyor of justice and local father figure in Mondstadt, nor Lauma who sacrifices her own health for the sake of sickly Moon Scions, says a WORD about it?? Sure, we got the occasional one liner and a huff of disgust from Nefer, but you’re trying to tell me no-one was more peeved? This is just a reflection of the game’s absolutely horrid writing, they would much rather spend an hour replaying the same information in repetitive, mundane dialogue, than actually explore character dynamics and reactions that reflect their personality. But it also contributes to the casual trivialisation of his crimes (which is, the more specific issue with the lack of reaction apart from my personal grievance LOL).
His love story with Tholindis is pathetic. First, they never got engaged, lets get that out of the way, because it makes me giggle whenever people refer to her as his wife or fiancee; they did not even get engaged yet because she hesitated. They were a very basic and inoffensive couple, right up until the point where they showed Tholindis’ absolute indifference to learning that Rerir was actively killing her (distant) family, and Rerir’s sudden whiny pity that his lover was actually part of the race he was brutally slaughtering.
This could’ve been interesting. It SHOULD’VE been. It gave the perfect opportunity to explore complex themes of grief, sorrow, and guilt. Instead? It was the same boring, cookie-cutter, utterly pathetic: “I love wife so I must get her back” crazed obsession, sprinkled with the teeny bit of lore about Teyvat's moons.
Now, would that have been bad if they hadn’t attempted to redeem him? No. I actually think it would’ve been super unique and fascinating to watch two completely selfish, morally reprehensible characters, love each other. But it is the additional layer of Hoyoverse attempting to coax SORROW for these two by trying to portray them as “doomed”? Yeah you can fuck yourself actually because that is utterly disgusting. To trivialise a genocidal, baby-murdering maniac by giving him a SOMEWHAT intriguing romantic attachment has got to be one of the most actively disturbing writing choices I have ever had the misfortune of reading.
The absolute audacity, after showing us an entire sequence of his bloody, savage carnage and wholly greedy, self-serving desires born from a “love” that had long failed and been let go of by the pursued, to proceed to give us an entire sequence of one of his victims, Columbina, speaking to him, is the equivalence of spitting in my face and telling me to thank you for the water.
Because what do you mean that only NOW he searches for pity? Only now he feels a tiny bit of regret? Regret that only spawns once he sees Tholindis in the flesh? He fucking feels shame seeing her now??? Thank fuck Columbina gave me the tiniest bit of satisfaction by telling him if he wants her to tell Tholindis about the fact he tried to murder more people, that made me giggle—but then it made me angry at the end, because fuck you dude!!!! Don’t give me this deplorable character only to spend his final on screen sequence trying to gauge empathy for him with some of the worst, most self-pitying wank of dialogue I’ve ever fucking read!!
He is not a well written character for the very fact that they completely backtracked whatever positive characterisation that built the foundation of his villainy. They gave him irredeemable and unjustified crimes, and then did a complete 180 by trying to hold your hand and say; “wait… he killed children because he was told to! Also did you know he loves a woman?”. I am almost one hundred percent certain that the overall fandom likeness for Rerir comes from some sort of heterosexual blindness. It seems that any male character that has an almost obsessive devotion to a woman is deemed as “romantic” or “perfect”. Like did everyone go through some sort of psychosis to forget that this man is a self-gratifying Israeli after seeing that he has a lover???
there are people in the genshin fandom more willing to forgive and redeem rerir—you know, the baby killing genocide n*zi dude who had no remorse when killing 6 year olds, all because he had a girlfriend that barely wanted to be with him at one point, than to accept that columbina is just a badly written female character but not so horrible you can villainise her entire archetype and existence because it was flawed.
tldr anime erika kirk and charlie kirk over here get more flowers than just a badly written female character
ཐི synopsis: how the demon brothers treat your child(ren…) and generally how good they are as fathers.
ཐི feat. demon bros
ཐི warnings: gender neutral mc, you will enjoy mpreg or die starving, small mentions of pregnancy
ཐི a/n: the thought of having children or being pregnant repulses me but thinking about how mammon canonically takes care of an ill girl in the human world and provides for her…yeah it makes me reconsider. feel free to ignore any mention of pregnancy and imagine you adopted kids instead! i honestly didn’t write a lot about it because i always just imagine one of the brothers births the kid like a seahorse
𝔄𝔳𝔞𝔱𝔞𝔯 𝔬𝔣 𝔓𝔯𝔦𝔡𝔢 ♱ LUCIFER
⛥ hated the idea, loved the outcome.
⛥ listen, you two already have over six children (yes i am counting luke), he was certain you didn’t need any more until a little while. it was less about him not wanting children, and more “please for the love of hell give me one year to have you all to myself i can’t do this anymore.”
⛥ but he’s super attentive during the pregnancy!! he claims he’s not panicking while actively putting curses on every food that you’ve been craving so beel can’t touch it, making sure one of his brothers has an eye on you at all times just in case…, and yeah maybe his heart does stop when you bump into something by accident. he assures you he isn’t panicking, just concerned. someone pass him an advil. you banned him from any sort of alcohol, how is he meant to cope with all the grey hairs you force on him now…
⛥ dad with the cat he didn’t want is basically the vibe with him. he insists you two are sufficient, but the kid sticks to him like literal glue…and lucifer just lets them. he’s got the right physique to pop the kid on his hip too, so you bet he’s using it to his advantage by showing off the kid while hurrying to close any sort of unwanted conversation.
⛥ “excuse me, my son needs to take a nap at this time.” or “pardon, my daughter requires my attention." he reaaaaally loves to emphasise the “my” portion…
⛥ while he loves the kid, he is still relatively stern. no swimming after eating for at least a half hour, stand up straight, call diavolo “lord” and not “uncle” in front of company, represent the family responsibly, don’t gorge yourself during dinner—granted, his rules get pushed about with a little too much ease with even the smallest smile from his little baby…he can’t help it. making exceptions for that tiny face is worth the little dignity loss.
⛥ keeps a picture of both you and your child in his wallet right alongside his brothers, all of his beloved family, together like they should be ♡
⛥ lucifer does prefer to keep a lot of his life private, no one in the devildom actually knew he had a child until he gets interrupted during a speech by a very energetic and proud toddler screaming “dad” at the stage. no, he didn’t smile. he was actually really upset. totally…
⛥ somehow, despite your best efforts and carefree lenience, your child still ends up choosing lucifer over you. hey, at least you get a break right?
𝔄𝔳𝔞𝔱𝔞𝔯 𝔬𝔣 𝔊𝔯𝔢𝔢𝔡 ♱ MAMMON
⛥ he basically all ready has a kid, and it’s kind of my hope that they’ll actually bring this up again in the new game because i still think it’s the most adorable fact about him
⛥ like, what do you mean THE avatar of greed is allowing himself to be exploited by witches all for the sake of a sickly, orphaned human girl he found?? and that he’s making sure she gets all the aid she needs even while he’s away? AND the fact he never even talks about this or reveals it to any of his brothers to gloat?? because he genuinely cares???
⛥ this man loves kids to his core, there’s something so sweet about how honest they are that makes the idea of even starting a family with you pop into his mind. if a kid is unfiltered with their words…it means he gets 10x more praise for being absolutely cool, perfect, and amazing (totally not his words, this is just fact, trust me.)
⛥ you know how mammon often sends out MC to troll lucifer because that man is way too softhearted to properly punish them? oh you BETTT he’s doing that with your kid without any shame. don’t worry, the baby gets very lovingly compensated with whatever treat you decided to ban.
⛥ quite literally trains your kid like a crow to help steal shit from his brothers, pretends he didn’t do it and that it’s just the mammon genes, but you know better. what made this significantly funnier though, is that when caught, no one can actually get mad at the child. so, instead, they take the money back and buy the kid something instead. it’s a peaceful negotiation that ends with mammon’s begrudging smile. if his baby is happy, so is he!
⛥ giggles aside, he loves your child genuinely so much he gets mopey about it. sometimes you’ll hear him sniffle during the night while trying to convince you that it’s allergies, all the while he’s scrolling through the album on his phone absolutely littered with pictures of his precious baby… screw having a velcro baby, he’s a velcro dad.
⛥ he’s impossible to take outside for family outings, he complains 24/7 about everything and anything; “the car-seat straps are digging into the baby’s arms”, “it’s too cold/hot to go out anywhere”, “too many people are lookin’”, “we need more snacks”….and so on and so forth.
⛥ you can fully blame mammon for your kid being so spoiled, and blame yourself for how adorably charming they are to be able to convince anyone and everyone around them to give them whatever they want. your genes together are genuinely frightening everyone’s wallets.
⛥ mammon does really try his best to keep your kid grounded at least somewhat. he loves to spoil them and show them off (hey, he FINALLY has something he can hold over his brother’s heads), but mammon is also extremely kind and sensitive. he won’t scold your kid for getting into fights, but will have that sigh of disappointment that hurts worse than being yelled at. he won’t argue or berate them, but will let a silence linger when they’ve said something unacceptable, before calmly explaining that it’s not right. honestly, with his personality? he’d arguably raise the most emotionally intelligent and sweet child ever.
⛥ but also don’t let him play with the kid with any sort of movie or cartoon in the background. that man will be absolutely laser beaming on the screen, probably while sniffling, as the kid sneaks off to find a battering ram to hit lucifer with.
𝔄𝔳𝔞𝔱𝔞𝔯 𝔬𝔣 𝔈𝔫𝔳𝔶 ♱ LEVIATHAN
⛥ oof. now listen i don’t think he’d be a terrible dad, just a very…inattentive one. one that definitely gets a little more than peeved when you spend more time with the baby than with him. he’s not jealous of the kid, just that, once again, he barely has a chance of being alone with you.
⛥ don’t get me wrong, i really love levi, but we gotta be realistic. that man is a BUM. he’s completely fine having children on stardew valley with you, but to have an actual snotty baby that smears crayons on walls and constantly knocks over his figurines? he’d rather just get a cat at that point. preferably another snake.
⛥ you will have to be very firm on who’s naming the baby. he WILL be naming a daughter ‘ruri’, and your son ‘henry’. don’t worry, if you don’t like those, he’s got at least a thousand more anime characters to choose from! he won’t mind whatever you choose, but he will be very pouty about not getting his way.
⛥ he may eventually enjoy the prospect of having a kid though…especially when he has no choice after you have it. it just takes a little longer for levi to actually warm up to the fact he has to pay attention to a vulnerable baby, and his fandom events. don’t ask which one he prioritises more. he’ll cry.
⛥ everyone notices how he’s significantly more tense. tending to lash out more frequently when the guilt of never feeling like he’s enough of a father boils over with his responsibilities and hobbies. it’s too much for any person to handle, let alone a guy who’s only perception of love comes from dating sims.
⛥ i don’t want to go into the biological logistics of a human having a baby with a demon (mainly because i’m lazy), but i will say…he definitely had his tail around your stomach for at least a few weeks. did anyone really know if he was supposed to keep the clutch warm? no, but it was pretty soothing for your sore back, so you’re not complaining! he did end up repeating the same thing with your kid; keeping them tucked in his tail and tugging them back once they wander too far from his lap.
⛥ he really is useless otherwise, and where he does help it’s usually because you told him in explicit instructions…
𝔄𝔳𝔞𝔱𝔞𝔯 𝔬𝔣 𝔚𝔯𝔞𝔱𝔥 ♱ SATAN
⛥ i’m honestly 50/50 with whether satan would have kids or not…
⛥ satan is rather mature, stable, intelligent, and responsible in many aspects of life; but he’s also someone still struggling deeply with his explosiveness and inferiority complex. he knows the logistics, the struggles, the care and help he can provide won’t necessarily outweigh his impatience and fear.
⛥ he can read all the parenting help books all he likes, but he can’t read about nighttime feedings that have you bawling from the soreness. he can’t read about just how much his chest aches when you push him away when everything gets too much. he can’t read about how hard it is to sleep at night knowing your beloved has run themselves ragged with a baby that doesn’t even understand how burdening they can be.
⛥ doesn’t mean he won’t absolutely try his best; propping your body on heavenly light pillows, constant massages to your aching temples and back, with a little healing spell imbued into his fingertips; occasionally, when the pain clearly dawns on you, he’ll quietly transfer the ailments to himself just long enough so you don’t get suspicious.
⛥ he learns to regulate his emotions remarkably better with a baby on hand. he’s meant to be setting an example, if his kid learns all the parts of him that he hates about himself? he’d forever have to deal with watching someone he loves turn into something that isolates them.
⛥ none of that cocomelon bullshit will stand in this house. calm vintage cartoons on the weekend as a little treat, while he spends the weekdays engaging in some puzzles and chatting about his day, winding down each night with his baby scrunched up on his chest as he reads out a children’s book. yes, he does genuinely let out a tear whenever you join these reading sessions, he isn’t afraid to admit that much.
⛥ literally dreads the day his kid says no to his hugs and cuddles. he knows how he was when he was younger, just how horrid and brash his violence could get, and though he has full confidence he raised his child better than that, there is only so much you can do as a parent. newborn phase was definitely his favourite…no emo teen telling you to die…just a little being with a lashing tail, sleeping to the sound of his heartbeat…
𝔄𝔳𝔞𝔱𝔞𝔯 𝔬𝔣 𝔏𝔲𝔰𝔱 ♱ ASMODEUS
⛥ anyone who thinks that asmo would let his child be anywhere online or have their photo taken by his fans is dead wrong, and i am so happy to be proven right in the new game!! that baby is his to hold and see the soft chubby cheeks of! only he’s allowed to throw little photoshoots to take extravagant pictures!! he’s all ready not particularly thrilled when people interrupt your personal dates and quality time together with the flash of a camera, and this gets MUCH worse when you’re all out on a family day together.
⛥ he’d be the opposite of those awful family channels online. until your kid is shoulder height to luke, they aren’t being put in the public eye EVER (except maybe a small cameo of their chubby hand in his…he can only resist so much!)
⛥ he pampers you so hard it’s unbelievable. well, he’s always done that, never letting you have a moment where you didn’t feel your absolute best, but with how daunting parenthood is, he takes special attention to you.
⛥ he loves his little baby yes, but you’re still his first baby—and you get the ultimate priority. he’s got solomon to syphon the baby off to, plus the more reasonable and sensible of the brothers like satan and beelzebub, while he lathers you with attention and care that you utterly deserve. it’s a special kind of pleasure, watching your tightened shoulders relax after hours of cradling the baby to bed.
⛥ it’s asmo, i have to get a little NSFW here. but that man has practically every and any kink, so you bet the whole reason you even ended up having a kid was because the idea of breeding you felt way too good to pass up. doesn’t matter if you can or can’t have kids either, he just loves you so much…and himself. he can’t help but get a little overexcited and let himself go ♡
⛥ that kid is the happiest accident asmo’s ever had. listen, he realistically never actually planned to be a dad…he can rut into you all he likes and dirty talk about it for hours—but actually having a living, breathing little baby that follows him around? not really something he thought about until now. didn’t mean he wasn’t super excited!
⛥ he’s fine having however many or little children you want, but i actually think he would prefer to have just one. his love is very easy to expand to hold however many people in his heart—but there’s something so much more special in having a baby that looks up at him with such single minded focus and adoration.
⛥ no, the kid still isn’t allowed in his room. not at all. he loves your child so goddamn much, but if they get into his limited edition makeup with that sweet, innocent curiosity? especially one that they’ve inherited from YOU? mammon would be his first target for the rage that followed.
𝔄𝔳𝔞𝔱𝔞𝔯 𝔬𝔣 𝔊𝔩𝔲𝔱𝔱𝔬𝔫𝔶 ♱ BEELZEBUB
⛥ oh that man wants children BAD.
⛥ i need to get horny here because i just KNOW beel is a massive freak. you cannot hide shit behind that innocent façade…he wished for this exact scenario for absolute ages.
⛥ if you told him you never wanted kids, he would be completely fine with it don’t get me wrong. he is more than content having a big family that includes his brothers, you, and your other friends…but soon as he senses any agreement on the notion of children…he wants IN!
⛥ literally drooled at the thought. you, his family, his beloved everything, the sweet potato to his honey drizzle… with a kid…or two (maybe, if he asks nicely). more food, more joy, and more people to share in the love that you provide.
⛥ strange food cravings? do you mean his meal plans? nothing is strange to this man. same as nothing being too much trouble; if you want that particular hot honey mac and cheese you had at the one restaurant in the human realm several years ago at like 4 in the morning, he will get it for you no questions asked (with a shit ton of extras for the road). he is a ‘little’ weak with food, so cut him some slack when he inevitably sneaks a bite…
⛥ he loves your munchkin so much it’s ridiculous. takes them out everywhere, with your expressed permission, with those cute wrap carriers (that you did have to alter to fit his large torso). nothing feels better than going around searching for the source of a mind numbingly delicious scent, with the sweetest, fattest blob of orange, downy hair breathing warmly against his hammering heart. literally feels like he’s been reborn as an angel again.
⛥ if you thought he was protective over his family then, it gets significantly worse with a baby on board. beel takes great pride in loving and protecting his family. one of the few things he can use his freakish strength for that doesn’t involve carrying tubs of ice cream is the ability to frighten people away. this doesn’t limit itself to you and the child either, his brothers have also found themselves feeling a little less tense when shopping around the devildom.
⛥ WILL set up play dates with luke. not just because that’s also his little munchkin, but because he needs some of those baking skills to transfer to his kid…it’s for the right cause, okay? think about all the failed cookies he could eat as a treat (˶‾᷄ ⁻̫ ‾᷅˵)
𝔄𝔳𝔞𝔱𝔞𝔯 𝔬𝔣 𝔖𝔩𝔬𝔱𝔥 ♱ BELPHEGOR
⛥ no, just hell no.
⛥ belphie would think about putting himself up for adoption before ever having children. like, he loves you, but this love has certain limits…
⛥ HE is the uncle that comes around once a year to visit his brothers’ kids, offering gifts and money so he becomes the family favourite. probably gets a little territorial over them like cows do wit their young. but i cannot imagine this bum ever wanting to have kids, or being a parent that is entirely present and not dependent on you to do majority of the labour.
⛥ obviously if you do end up having a kid by accident, he’ll try to take some level of responsibility, and granted, any child left with him would be safe and cozy…but are you sure you want to manage a rowdy, clingy toddler with a guy who is the youngest in the family?
obey me ido glazers are mad annoying because why are you genuinely having a fit over long time fans of a franchise being upset and disappointed that a company completely ruined their own game and characters? i’m convinced none of you know how to do basic research into solmare if you think this company needs yall to glaze them this hard…the game is shit and is completely devoid of personality and charm. enjoy the slop if you want to, but why are you baffled that people don’t like it lmao
