hiraeth.

lost in translation

[vanishedhalf]

life in 35mm film

📷: olympus superzoom 700xb

🎞: kodak gold 200

[vanishedhalf]

my cornelia street

[vanishedhalf]

could've been better... but still, i enjoyed it a lot 😄

[vanishedhalf]

20221126

📍national museum of anthropology

📍national museum of fine arts

the almost three years of lockdown broke the yearly streak of visiting these museums that i started since 2018. i was so glad to finally get to visit again (although i was saddened when i saw that some exhibits, particularly those i fell in love with before, are now gone)

[metamorphesque]

I have so much love in me that I would like to cry.  

Simone de Beauvoir, Kayleb Rae Candrilli, Sylvia Plath, Clarice Lispector

buy me a coffee

[vanishedhalf]

You drew up some good faith treaties

I drew curtains closed, drank my poison all alone

You said I have to trust more freely

But diesel is desire, you were playin' with fire

[septemberkisses]

To be loved is to be known; to be seen.

Excerpts Sources:

Is it okay to say this? - Trista Masteer // Blasted - Sarah Kane // Reassurances to Hades - Kristina Haynes // The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo - T.J. Reid // My Mother/Madame Edwarda/The Dead Man - Georges Bataille //"The Last Poem in the Book," These Days (Alfred A. Knopf, 1989); Over and over again - Frederick Seidel // My Mother/Madame Edwarda/The Dead Man - Georges Bataille // Adult Children of Emotionaly Immature Parents - Lindsay C. Gibson // She Satisfies A Fear with the Rhetoric of Tears - Sor Juana Inés de la Cruz // My Life Is Pathetic! - Heather Havrilesky

[wedarkacademia]

(via violentwavesofemotion)

[peculiartrash]

the secret history as good place quotes

[aredhels]

The circus arrives without warning. No announcements precede it. It is simply there, when yesterday it was not.

THE NIGHT CIRCUS, ERIN MORGENSTERN

[vanishedhalf]

ang pangit ng shot, because it’s gloomy that day. the place is superb and breathtaking. i was captivated, my heart lept out of joy. 😄

feb. 11, 2018. the day that i left half of my heart at UST. the interview was nerve-racking (because i really want to excel and get in).

“i hope that you’ll pass, and if you pass, you’ll stay.” these are the words that my interviewer said to me. i did not believe his words for a while. i’m thinking that he only said that to console my sorry ass.

yesterday, march 01, 2018, was the biggest plot twist of my life. i was busy thinking what would happen if i don’t get it. i was contemplating why didn’t i made my secons option fully furnished. i was really anxious last night that i’m having minor panic attacks. then i tried to open the portal, and check my status. “passed interview, reserve program”. i was in an awe. i couldn’t breathe. i was dumbfounded.

shete talaga, di ko inexpect na maipapasa ko yung interview since i am the dubmfest person accdg to myself lol. pero maraming salamat! see u soon UST!

[vanishedhalf]

i stayed...

and i'm glad i did because last june, i graduated.

the journey was surprisingly short (especially due to the fact that half of my supposed college experience was interrupted by the global panini) yet i enjoyed it all.

the sleepless nights. the frustrations on heavy workloads. the tears. the exhaustion.

all of these—cannot compare to the friends i gained. the learnings i learned through these experiences. and most importantly, the warmth ust embraced me with.

four years feels so short that if given a chance, i would like to experience it all over again (maybe for post-grad? hahaha) but we'll see...

[blackcherry-jam-deactivated2023]

The Holy, the Divine, the Sinful, and the Corrupted.

A Season in Hell, Arthur Rimbaud // The Double Image, Anne Sexton // Beatrice, Gustave Doré's Illustration for “The Divine Comedy” by Dante Alighieri // Rebel Angels Being Thrown out of Heaven, Gustave Doré's Illustration for “Paradise Lost” by John Milton // The Last Days of Judas Iscariot, Stephen Adly Guirgis // Snow and Dirty Rain, Richard Siken // Speeches for Doctor Frankenstein, Margaret Atwood // Fallen Angel (details), by Alexandre Cabanel.

[vanishedhalf]

i wake up at noon. work in the evening. then go home at dawn—this is the routine i've established for a little more than three months now.

some may hate living life like this and yet i like it. no... i love it.

i love how blissfully boring my life had become. but you know what i love most with this set up? is that i get to see both the sunrise and sunset. in the early mornings when i ride angkas home, and in the afternoon while i prepare myself to work.

i don't know why it feels particularly special this way.

[vanishedhalf]

[vanishedhalf]

thank you for being my constants.✨

[vanishedhalf]

college is testing my will.

[realifedreamgirl]