The way I'm so deeply sad and feel like I can't talk to anyone about it bc I don't even understand what's wrong with me
I feel like everyone is mad at me or sees me as a burden all the time and I'm so tired of my own mind messing with me

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@vhsdisaster
The way I'm so deeply sad and feel like I can't talk to anyone about it bc I don't even understand what's wrong with me
I feel like everyone is mad at me or sees me as a burden all the time and I'm so tired of my own mind messing with me
Ope
I really wish I didn't hate myself and feel guilty every time I eat anything
And every time I binge I feel guilty and swear I'll never do it again but then I do and I hate myself even more
mentally still in march 2020 when we thought it would just be a two months holiday from school
wait put in the tags what was going on in your life at that time I'm curious
Like I really was doing better with food and tracking calories, in a healthy way, but it's all gone downhill and I feel like I'll be fat forever
I'm scared to weigh myself. I know I've gained and I'm scared to see how much. I don't want to tell anyone but this anon blog I have because that means they'll be watching me all the time.
I feel like no one besides my family and one friend will like me or love me as long as I'm fat. It sucks to feel like this and also to know that once I lose the weight, if I ever do, people will treat me better, notice me, be nicer. I need therapy badly and not just bc of my ED.
hey love. i'm sorry you're not doing good rn, but just know that things will get better. sending you love 💖
Thank you sm 💜
I've relapsed in binging : /
I have such a terrible relationship with food. My family thinks I'm being "healthy" but really every night I'm desperately searching my room for things to eat because I get so hungry at night and obsessively thinking about my next meal. I've been thinking about calories so much lately. The last few days have been 1,200, a little above, or less calories. But it still feels like too much. I'm so hungry rn and I've just eaten dinner. I'm so tired of being fat and scared to step on the scale.
Just ate dinner and I'm so hungry still 🧍time to log my calories and feel bad about it. I'm still scared to step on the scale
Just ate dinner and I'm so hungry still 🧍time to log my calories and feel bad about it. I'm still scared to step on the scale
gender is a joke and i just stopped laughing.
if anyone needs to talk pls message me. i do too
"Weird energy in here today" I say, referring to the inside of my brain.
*refuses to look at texts* I love conversation and communication
me: i’m glad i’ve never had flashbacks about trauma i had no awareness of
me: *laying in bed while my brain supplies an objectively terrifying sensory memory and then drags up a suspicious memory i never thought to look into* um. wait-
my brain: maybe these are connected :)
me: