"Father were you ever proud of me?" Jacob mumbles, his words he hopes don't fall upon deaf ears ; the boy expects a sigh of disappointment or a lecture to which he would not be surprised (nor even fazed). The query just came swiftly -- randomly & he can already feel the regret burning his conscience as their gazes met. (his father always had that scowl, it was unsettling & he envied the way the older man looked at his siblings, the scowl washing off his expression & filled with -- delight.)
NE’ER did he dare to think to bear children with her yet here they were, Twins with both children having each of their traits. They were Beautiful & were truly a miracle. Now wonder filled his mind as he looked into the lad’s eyes (just like his mother’s, bright & glimmered with undeniable charm), his thoughts drift at how quickly his sonhad grown where he’d been absent in those years to witness his littleboy flourish into a young man. Someday he would be just as tall as he is, perhaps taller yet the man dreaded what awaits in the future & he cherishes every hour he was ‘permitted’ to be visited by these lovely twins.
THE query stirs him away from his thoughts, the lad downcast and awaiting a response. Eyes he closes to muse ‘pon why such came from him, perhaps Grayson lacked what it meant to be called a ‘father’ or perhaps he may have not given his full attention towards his son but when he does it just involved scolding & parting with dismay rather than leaving words of encouragement & guidance. The former knight breathes to ease his chest from the clogging pain of recalling his own ludicrous behaviour (well look where Jacob acquired such brashness). His calloused hands he places onto Jacob’s shoulders, his expressions relaxes & eases the wrinkles between his brows & the man looks at him again earnest gratification befell his words, voice rough and hushed.
GRAYSON does not wish to keep Jacob in a cage built by doubt, he does not wish for his son to remember him as the father who only scolded him, who never loved him yet he DID. He always has.“ Never doubt the pride I feel for you son for I have ALWAYS been proud of you from the day I held you in my arms. When you parted your first words I have never felt more gratified in my life. ”
