There Was A Hole Here

-Adri and Howl's stupid tulpa adventures -(Occasionally NSFW) -Joint mental health blog

[voidstuffthings]

/comes out to shoo off the porn bots and update my about

Gnnhhhh, not quite ready to be active on this blog yet.,,, ,,

Everything’s cool we’re just all swimming in psychological damage. 

Here’s my main blog in case you ever want to reach me (which I am also rarely active on but I at least check it every day)

[voidstuffthings]

So like

we’re totally not dead

[voidstuffthings]

I need some help

Alrighty, I’m gonna have to get a little down and dirty on biological terminology here so sorry in advance for this.

It seems like nowadays Howl is only ever noticeably active/i can feel him when I’m on my period. Like, it’s the only time he can switch and the only time it doesn’t feel like there’s a big huge wall in the way of me looking into my own head. I don’t know if he’s asleep, in his incoherent dog-space, or what because he doesn’t seem to remember where he was or what he’s been doing whenever he comes back. 

I feel like this is mostly my fault though, because my mental state has been all out whack and it’s mostly because of chemical imbalance. So I’m wondering if hormones have anything to do with it, as Owen suggested.

I haven’t brought this up to him yet, because, y’know HE HASN’T BEEN HERE, so I haven’t been able to get his input (considering he loooves his biologies, fuckin nerd).

[pink-vivace]

When someone calls you by the host’s name

When someone calls you by the host’s name but you’re undercover

[hantavirologist]

Howl E3

One down :U

I wanted to show more teefers but 

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

(He gives way more fucks than he’d ever admit. :\ )

[voidstuffthings]

SHIIIIIT

We haven’t been on this blog in...

a rly long time.

I am so fucking sorry, I’m

HEY GUYS HAPPY NEW YEARS HAHAH

hah

ehhhh

[unblockingwritersblock]

Character Development Checklist 2.0

Several months ago I posted the original Character Development Checklist, because why wouldn’t you need dozens of random questions about your character?

In my humble opinion, there’s no such thing as too many questions. How can we ever know too much about our characters? The reader might not see it, but everything the author knows will mold the characters and the story. How can that be a bad thing?

Which is exactly why I added dozens of questions to the original character sheet. Check out a link to the first one above, and scroll below for an updated version

Basics:

Character’s Name (first, middle, last)

Character’s Nickname(s)

Name pronunciation

Origin of name

Age

Ethnicity

Sex/Gender

Sexual orientation

Hair color

Eye color

Height

Weight

Scars

Tattoos

Birthmarks

Piercings

Right/left handed/ambidextrous

Glasses/contacts

Apparel:

Clothing preferences

Accessories

Style

Trinkets

Favorite possession

Equipment

Grooming habits

Family and Relationships:

Parents

Siblings

Grandparents

Marital Status

Significant Other

Children

Pets

Friends

Enemies

Close relatives

Non-close relatives

Ancestors

Religion:

The religion they follow (if any)

Beliefs

Superstitions

Virtues

Location:

Country of Birth

Place of Birth (State, city, etc)

First Language

Cultures

Traditions

Schooling:

Highest Education

Degrees

Home-schooled/public school/private school

Favorite subject

Favorite teacher

Least favorite subject

Least favorite teacher

Average grade

Study habits

Special education

Graduating year

Work:

Occupation

Salary

Employment history

Work space

Mode of Transportation

Total income

Boss

Hours

Experience

Co-worker relationships

Rank

Work ethic

Home:

Rent or Own

House, apartment, etc

Mode of transportation

Living space

Address

Hometown

Inner Workings Of Your Character:

Secrets

Fears

Worries

Eating Habits

Food preferences

Sleep preferences

Work preferences

Book preferences

Music preferences

Introverted/extroverted

Optimist/pessimist

Hobbies

Pet peeves

Prejudices

Proud of

Biggest vulnerability

Embarrassed by

Worst memory

Best memory

Earliest memory

Fondest memory

Skilled at

Unskilled at

Attitude

Obsessions

Stresses

Addictions

Handicaps (physical)

Handicaps (emotional/psychological)

Allergies

Medical history

IQ

Temperament

Attitude

Perception and outlook on life

Desires

Regrets

Soft spots

Habits:

Verbal quirks

Physical quirks

Gestures

Work habits

Sleeping habits

Annoying habits

Irrational habits

Eating habits

Healthy habits

Unhealthy habits

Mannerisms

Drinking habits

Vices

Objects Kept In - And Why:

Their closet

Their bedroom

Their purse/bag

Their fridge

Their car

Their desk

Their pockets

Their junk drawer

Their glove compartment

Their backpack

Their locker

Their car trunk

Their wallet

Their suitcase

Favorites:

Favorite book

Favorite movie

Favorite hobby

Favorite animal

Favorite color

Favorite season

Favorite food

Favorite drink

Favorite time of day

Favorite song

Favorite music genre

Favorite memory

Favorite band

Favorite words

Favorite subject

Favorite number

Favorite TV-show

Favorite place

Least Favorite:

Least favorite book

Least favorite movie

Least favorite hobby

Least favorite animal

Least favorite color

Least favorite season

Least favorite food

Least favorite drink

Least favorite time of day

Least favorite song

Least favorite music genre

Least favorite memory

Least favorite band

Least favorite words

Least favorite subject

Least favorite number

Least favorite TV-show

Least favorite place

Other:

Talents

Political preference

Strengths

Flaws

Prized possessions

Special/favorite memories

Time and date of birth

What they love

What they hate

Social class

Sports/clubs

Blood type

Posture

Speech impediments

Spending habits

[amutualmind]

This would make a great tulpa creation sheet too.:)

[voidstuffthings]

I was working on a picture and I couldn’t not post this here

This is it this is the only picture of Howl that matters

The only way this could be more perfect is if he was showing his teefers or something but I just here he is the biggest douche in the universe in the galaxy

All hail the douchelord

[voidstuffthings]

The problem with monster boy tulpas

So Howl disappeared again, and I wasn’t sure WHY because it felt like it hadn’t been that long between his ‘feeding periods’, but apparently it was because he came back not entirely out of THAT head space.

It was kind of... unsettling. Like, not SCARY or anything, because I’m not really afraid of him but he’s got a really predatory presence about him and he just doesn’t really talk at all and kind of just... stares. He also was sticking really close to me and he felt very large and overbearing but it was kind of nice? Like sitting next to a giant wild dog that may or may not have some lingering violent tendencies. He wasn’t NOT affectionate though, in a weird “I’m going to sit RIGHT HERE next to you and enjoy your physical contact and you’re not gonna move or I’m going to make weird growling noises and glare at you” way. It was kind of cute? And then he was a bit aggressive/vigorous/insistent in another sense but I’m not going to go into details about that. After that I kind of just had to keep an eye on him in the Void because he was really pent up and for some reason was aggressively looking for Ran (Owen was at work)? And then I think Sammy came and got him because I got a bit of an “OOPS, wasn’t done watching him, sorry!” vibe and then he wasn’t there anymore.

But ye, I got to babysit Howl in his predatory head space and it was kind of nice but also kind of awkward. And this is the closest Sammy and I have gotten to bumping into each other in years. I’d like to legit talk to him someday but thought still gives me anxiety so I guess I’m not ready yet.

[voidstuffthings]

I’ve never really ever drawn a profile shot of Howl before (because I’m awful at them), but here’s the most accurate one I could make (from another picture i’m working on).

He makes the :< face a lot (because of the way his mouth is shaped). Except more like >:< because he’s got constant angry eyebrows. (I made him look rly blank here for some reason, idk this is his ‘staring at a wall’ face.)

I drew this shot from the right before I remembered that’s which one of his eyes is missing OTL So here’s a (cleaned up) look at his gaping eye socket I guess.

Also bad posture is bad, his spine is so fucked up.

[aight-im-boutta-dip]

Shy said the f word for the first time today We’ve come so far :“’)

[voidstuffthings]

1 Billion f-words later and it’s still just as heart warming, especially when you’re just minding your own business and you hear it in the form of a scream coming from the back of your head. :’D

[thatmultiplefeel-archive]

Tmfw all of ur headmates aren't human except you and they keep askin you how to do "human things"

[voidstuffthings]

He misses his tounge piercing so bad

I talked to Howl about how I want to get my septum pierced after Christmas (and how he can’t fucking use our tounge to play with it) and he was just like “ -squint- ... It’ll do.”

[voidstuffthings]

My hair is blue again

I was blonde for like, 2 days and I finally dyed it again last night.  The best thing about this scenario is  Howl finally came back to the front and is like “WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU CONSTANTLY SPONTANEOUSLY CHANGING YOUR APPEARANCE I CAN’T FUCKING KEEP UP, GODDAMMIT.”

Bro, you can’t keep up with ANYTHING.

He switched again once more in the last couple weeks though, but apparently he was too ‘in the moment’ to remember anything specific that happened. He was with Owen though, so I think it’s not too hard to assume what the gist of it was. >_>

-aggressive shrugging-  I’M- How do you not come to expect these things by now?? Honestly.

BUT YE, everything’s good FOR NOW. In fact, everything’s great for now. There’s obvious impending stress/hardship in the future (i don’t really feel like elaborating) but...

SHUT THE HELL YOUR MOUTH, you’re doing this on purpose aren’t you? You are LITERALLY looking for an excuse to be anxious. Stop it.

I’m sorry ;m; Also sorry for the short hiatus. I guess. :U We’re back thoooo? -jazz hands-

[thatmultiplefeel-archive]

Tmfw oh hi you're back again oh you're leaving already oh hi again wait why are you leaving ok bye uh hi for the fifth time ok bye OK HI PLEASE STOP COMING IN AND OUT OF FRONT PLEASE YOU'RE GIVE NG ME A HEAD ACHE

[saccharine-guts]

i like to draw us together a lot when im sad

[voidstuffthings]

He’s so dumb

So Howl somehow disorientedly managed to switch when I fell asleep last night. Apparently he had no idea how he got there and had just kind of stumbled in. To be fair I had a channeled a somewhat noticeable emotional response from him beforehand and he probably was like ‘dafuq is this?’ and stumbled through the door I left open in his incoherent state. He and Owen were equally “:U ??!?” about it apparently and then they did some gay stuff idk.

Apparently he’s been completely brain-fucked out of his head the past couple weeks and has no idea what he’s been doing the whole time, so it’s probably a good thing I didn't go in and check on him because the lat time he was in that headspace he was fucking terrifying and both times I saw him (once in the Void and once in a dream) he was “eating” and I had to nope the fuck out (having a something-out-of-a-nightmare-fetish person-eating tulpa is great guys, it really is.)

But I figured that since he told Owen he was okay now I’d go in and check on him (upon Owen’s suggestion), and I did.

And he was napping on the couch (which probably means he expected me to pop in because that’s where we always meet up). So, like the self-entitled cat-mannered host that I am, I sat on him and told him to wake his ass up. 

He blinked at me for 15 seconds, gave an incoherent smirk and slurred something like “Hey baby, I knew you’d come looking for this”, grabbed my ass, and then passed tf back out (without relenting his grip on my backside).

he’s

such a dumb i can’t

He only recently woke up to fill me in on the deetz, I can feel his groggy glaring even now. I think there’s a middle finger mixed in there somewhere too.

Good to have you back, pups! :D

You’re not my real mom.

I missed you too! :’D

-thbpppt noises-