Swearing to the Infinite! @wanderlustgirl - Tumblr Blog

“why are you, as someone in their 30s, still on tumblr” oh so you think you’re gonna be normal when you’re my age? you think you’re gonna be CURED?? you think the witches’ curse will have been lifted by then?? cmon now

Pics of my life over the 2ish years.

#happy wife #thick wife

I'm Back Bitches!!!

its 2026 and life has been life-ing.

Lets see...let me get you up to speed. Since my last post, I think i was a couple months into living in the world of COVID in NYC. oof

We moved into a bigger apartment in October 2020.

My parents basically split up. My dad kicked my mom out. Dad is pure trauma for me. Mom lived with us for a about two years. She had knee surgery and had to stay in a rehab/nursing home.

We got her to live there soon after. It was a relief but still a challange.

Ethan and I got married Sept 2023. Even though about two weeks before Ethan was practically dying from low Hemoglobin levels. Had a couple blood transfusions and he was out and recovering.

I got transferred to another store to prepare to open another store.

We went to NOLA for our Halloween Honeymoon 2023.

I got pregnant about 6 months later. Opened a store while pregnant. Tried to NOT Stress throughout my pregnancy in this stressful world.

Gave birth to the most beautiful baby girl on Valentine's Day 2024. Oh my sweet Eloise <3

Today, a couple days after my 35th birthday. I have a wonderful husband. We go to couples therapy. I still go to therapy. I have a 11 month old who is an absolute doll. My mom is still in a nursing home, health declining. My first cat passed away. I'm living this life and I'm trying.

Thats a good update...i think?

#nyc #motherhood #therapy #emotionalhealth #marriedlife #blog

wanderlustgirl

6/14/20

I’m 29

I’m gonna start therapy for the first time next week.

I have anxiety. Self diagnosing depression.

I need to talk to someone. I’m really afraid but she sounded nice.

wanderlustgirl

I completed therapy. Just a couple months ago. She is still available if I need her but … I feel better.

Stressors:

My weight. Even with the weight loss. I still (working on it, but I’m good) feel too big to be anywhere and with people. It affected who I wanted to be around with. Felt too fat.

My family. My burden to carry all the weight and responsibilities. My mother lives with me due to my father being a piece of shit. I have to deal with everything and it even effects my relationship sometimes.

My sex drive. I felt self conscious for a while. My fat and my burdens. Totally good now. Thankfully!

My anxiety. I never liked to talk about it. I keep it all to myself. I felt like I was being a burden to others and I had to fix others before myself. Which was very unhealthy.

I’m not perfect but I’m trying.

Now I just want my mom to find a place so my babe and I can live peacefully with our 3 cats.

Le sigh

I’m...

my sex drive is gone? No way. I’m sad because this is not our first conversation. Am I too tired? Am I not feeling it? Is it my birth control? What am I going to do?

#sex #sex drive #sex help

It’s hump day from me. I cant remember day now.

All I want to do is move.

I was full of anxiety. I’m product team lead. I thought I was gonna mess up.

But

It’s a rainy day.

It’s slow. I can get a lot done. Still didn’t feel like it.

But it went okay. A couple people left early. It will be okay. I still panicked internally.

The night turned out fine. Like successful.

day 1 with therapy

it was okay. like really okay. she’s really nice. i hope we can work together with dealing with my anxiety.

Yooooo my tumblr doesn’t know I have cats!!!

#cats #catstagram #blackcat #greycat #bestfriends #cats are love #catsarecool

6/14/20

I’m 29

I’m gonna start therapy for the first time next week.

I have anxiety. Self diagnosing depression.

I need to talk to someone. I’m really afraid but she sounded nice.

11/18/19

I needed a place where I can cry and vent and express my feelings. Welp. I hate the life I’m living. I feel useless and sometimes I dont want to exist. I just want hover and watch the world. I witnessed my mom having an extreme panic attack/ seizure. who knows. Shes having a procedure where they have to cut her artery and put in a stent to clear out her artery. Scary stuff but it should be quick. She was already nervous, but with all of it being delayed by hours, she’s hungry and other patients complaining on how it doesnt work and then a nurse saying that if you dont have this done you could die. Who wouldnt freak out. I saw blood everywhere and shes screaming calling out my name. I’m trying to calm her down. Its really hard not to cry and as I hold her and console her. She punches me and bites me and cries on me. She has a cut on her artery and they want her calm. I’m honestly BSing right to calm her down. She finally calms down but it took me a while to get her in state of “relaxation”. We are home now but the car ride was bad too. She really wanted to escape from a moving car. I dont know what to do except for sing childrens nursery songs. Just so she can be distracted. I was scared for her. Shes home, she ate, she beat but okay.

im beat.