Keni
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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
hello vonnie
The Bowery Presents
bliss lane
izzy's playlists!
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Origami Around
pixel skylines
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Not today Justin
Sade Olutola
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Andulka
Color Me Curious
Cosimo Galluzzi
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
shark vs the universe
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Iraq
seen from Colombia
seen from Portugal
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Iraq
seen from Latvia
seen from Vietnam
seen from United States
seen from Poland
seen from Germany
seen from Czechia
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Malaysia
seen from Türkiye
seen from Latvia
seen from United Kingdom
@wannabeartsythug
The guilt I feel for wanting to run away from New York and not look back. I am so grateful and thankful for all I get to experience but I am deeply unhappy. I can’t differentiate whether that unhappiness is just rooted within me or where I am. I want to be unknown by the public but deeply known by few. I want to feel love. I want to be in love. I want to build things I only see in my dreams.
Trying to get my body to calm down/ reregulate after sleeping because the vivid/ sleep paralysis is back. Why am I in flight or fight after resting?? 😭
Feeling empty inside! 😀
I want a summer romance so bad but I’m so emotionally unavailable. Sigh.
fuck, marry, kill: the wound that won’t heal, the past you can’t undo, the ghost that keeps returning
I’ve come to the conclusion that when I start to catastrophize my love life and my ex I just have to remember that every single one of her relationships and situationships are exactly that. Sure I got unlucky with two failed relationships in a row but my instability doesn’t start and end with me. My stats show I can have a successful relationship.
As much as I hate to admit it I think this lifetime is one of repenting. Maybe in this lifetime I am to atone for my sins in the past lives. I am to give more than I receive. And not to sound ungrateful because I am blessed and abundant in the love of my community. But I fear I am not to be understood or seen for what I feel. I am happy to serve. This world is dark and twisted and fucked. Maybe I’m suppose to leave more than I get. But in the grand scheme of things to have been among side as my family, to question and object the norms and traditions that have come before me. My part in carrying on the linage might end with me but I am proud to say the cycle stops with me and all those who I helped shield. May they carry on and do better than those before them.
I MIISSSSS MYYYY WIFFFFEEEE
we haven’t met yet and I’m painfully single
Yet I YEARN
actually im doing really well except for the fact that everything makes me sad and the things that dont make me sad make me angry. but other than that im fine
Much sad. Very disappointed. In this lifetime I only hope to receive a fraction of the love I give. But sometimes it is what it is.
I finally got it but I’m too scared to start. Don’t want to talk to anyone about it either. There are many who are excited for me but the journey I want is different than they picture. Just wanna be a pretty boi.
I would never admit to anyone but I hurt in ways that I don’t think anyone would believe me. I’ve been fighting with my own brain for as long as I can remember. I grow tired, weary. I don’t want to be tolerated I wanted to be embraced. Loved for my flaws and all. I’ve loved so many who hurt, who has scars as deep as trenches but I’ve only ever been loved backed by one other person and I couldn’t even face them. I feel unloveable. Like an oil stain that you can’t get rid of. As the days grow I am more convinced that I leave behind no legacy. I have no impact. I will never amount to more than the fuck up that I was always expected to be. I’ve been trying to fight that destiny but I’m tired of fighting. Maybe I should just throw in the towel and accept my losses. Maybe this is my peak maybe it doesn’t get better. Better to bow out than have the curtains closed. There will be a day that comes where the luxuries and comfort I know will come to an end. Maybe that will be my time. Wish it could be peaceful
My heart is heavy
My brain is heavy
They both weigh me down
Drowning
I don’t want to fight anymore
If you drown in the ocean and no one is around to see, did you die?
Faith in myself is very different from having a delusion of something greater than what I am.
#fornothingthismantweaking
Also on some random shit (I love talking into the void) this girl who I don’t know aside from work cold invited me to her club birthday. Friend type shit right?
I feel too much
It’s always bothered me
The shame, the ego, the anxiety
What is neutral?
Is there a midpoint?
Life seems so preformative
Can we ever truly know?
The vulnerability, absolute trust, unwavering loyalty
No picture is the same
But I like to pretend that somewhere out there
Someone can see in both black and grey and technicolor
fuuuuck i just realized that the future idealized version of myself cant exist without current me being the catalyst for change and doing hard things. has anybody heard about this
i’m obsessed with how every single person can be stupid in their own special way and infinitely smart in another. simultaneously
