i think more people would benefit from an "i dont have to commit to this identity, if i ever change my mind, i dont have to identify that way anymore" approach to sexual/romantic orientation and gender identity
and also people need to stop treating you changing your mind as proof that you were faking the previous identity. or that you shouldn't be taken seriously when you're exploring your sexual/romantic orientation and gender identity because it's "just a phase" and you'll go "back to normal" eventually
the way i explain the "its just a phase"/"youre too young to know" shit to parents of trans kids is this: if your kid comes out as trans and you dont accept them (which involves gendering them correctly, using their new name, new clothes, allowing them to present how they want to present without verbal abuse, ect), youre either going to be wrong (which is very, VERY likely), or your kid is going to learn that they cant come to you about important things and that they cant tell you about themselves. your kid is going to learn that your love for them is conditional, that you dont accept them unconditionally, and that they cant trust you to tell you anything important. creating an environment where your kid cant come to you if they need love and support or HELP is NEVER going to be safe for your child, in fact you are actively putting them at risk of harm by doing that. if your child wants to go by he/him and wear boys clothes and cut his hair or whatever, going along with it, EVEN IF YOU THINK ITS A PHASE, AND EVEN IF HE LATER DECIDES HES JUST A CIS GIRL, is the safest and best thing that you can do for your child. even if your child is wrong, they will learn that you are a trustworthy person who they can be themselves around, and having parents that are accepting of your transition not only lowers their suicide risk EXPONENTIALLY, but it protects them from other areas of harm, such as csa and domestic violence
