I write weird shit

Pretty much the topic. I write weird, extreme fetish stories. There's very little I'm not into, so if one/some of the stories gross you out, don't write me off right away; I might still wind up writing something you like .All characters involved are 18+. Also, if you didn't grasp it from the name, there's going to be some weird stuff in here; if you're not into something a story's tagged with, save yourself the mental anguish and skip past it.

[weirdlewdstories]

Pls upload all of your stories to ao3, theyre so good I dont wanna lose even one of them :(

Aw, thanks, that made me smile. :)

I’ll try, yeah! Currently working on re-titling stuff, because on a more story-focused site, a title that’s just a description of the story seems rather gauche. (Unfortunately, I suck at titles, hence the lack of decent ones. Fortunately, I have help!)

[weirdlewdstories]

Migrating to AO3!

With Tumblr coming down like a ton of bricks on the people who enjoy adult content, I can tell where I’m not wanted. They might not be particularly aiming to hit works of text and such, but their bot’s already shown itself to be about as effective as blindly tossing darts, and, frankly, who knows what they’ll decide to hit next?

So, I’m moving on, importing at least most of my work over to here: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WeirdLewdStories

Maybe I’ll even write something again before the heat death of the universe, who knows?

[weirdlewdstories]

It's awesome to see you posting again! Sad to hear writing's gotten stressful for you from self doubt; it sucks when that gets too intense. If it's any help for when those feelings get overwhelming, know that you've got fans who love to see all those weird and cool ideas you think up and that don't even notice those tiny imperfections. Good luck with any future stories!

Thanks :D That does mean a lot to me! Especially coming from you, you do rad stuff.

[weirdlewdstories]

If it's any encouragement at all, there are a few of your stories over the last couple of years that I re-read still to reliably make myself cum.

It is! Thanks. I still can’t say how often I’ll be doing stuff, but I hope to at least try.

[weirdlewdstories]

Will you be posting anymore stuff anytime soon? And r u OK?

I’m alive, yeah.

I just find making content incredibly stressful, because I have constant doubts about every single aspect of whatever I’m doing.

That said, thank you for this ask. Odd as it might sound, it was seeing this in my inbox that got me to kick myself in the ass and force myself to write something.

[weirdlewdstories]

Oh shit I’m still alive, also fart inflation story

So, this was meant to be a birthday story for Octoboy, but, as you’ve probably noticed from my nonexistent content production, I find writing anything to be bizarrely stressful for no reason, so it just kinda languished, half-finished, until today, when I just kinda sat down and forced myself to write it. So, happy incredibly late birthday Octoboy, have some more fart inflation stuff, and I hope anyone who’s still watching this ghost town of a page enjoys too!

Gay, not-very-consensual fart inflation stuff ahead, so don’t read it if that’s not your thing.

Marcus shifted around in his seat, anxiously waiting to meet his new employer. He’d heard all kinds of things about the elven nobility, but it was almost all rumours, spoken by people who’d never really met them; Elves were generally pretty insular by nature, only really going out of their way to speak to people when they wanted something.

In his case, they’d sprung up pretty much out of the blue, asking him if he was interested in becoming the ‘plaything’ of an elven prince! A bit of an unsettling question, but the spell they used for translation had always been kind of wonky, as some things just didn’t translate that well, so the young man assumed that must’ve been it; an odd title, probably something like a friend, or companion. Someone to teach him about humans, maybe… still, when he’d asked what he’d have to do, they’d been frustratingly vague, just mentioning that the fact he was cute was enough.

“Honestly, I should’ve probably pressed for more details,” the brown-haired young man muttered to himself, glancing around the room once again. It was kind of an odd room, all told; huge in all directions, yet sparsely furnished, the whole thing ended up looking weirdly empty. Just as he started to shift in his chair, having second thoughts about the whole thing, a friendly voice made him jump.

“Aha~! Sorry if I kept you waiting, things to do, people to see - being a prince can be a royal pain in the butt.”

Blinking, Marcus looked over in the direction the voice was coming from… and did a double-take, staring in shock. Was this who he was supposed to be serving…? He certainly wasn’t what he’d expected…

Marcus himself wasn’t exactly tall, but the approaching elf was easily a head shorter than him, with soft, ivory-looking skin and blonde hair that hung to about his shoulders, and an androgynous enough face that, normally, Marcus would’ve had to question their sex. That wasn’t really an issue however, thanks to the prince’s attire - the tight, green latex thong left very little to the imagination, and what the elf lacked in height, he more than made up for with the monster dangling from his crotch, bulging the material out obscenely.

As Marcus found himself looking at the elf’s crotch, the prince just laughed, sticking a thumb into his thong, stretching it out and letting it snap back against him. “Hee. Like what you see, human? That’s good~ if you’re gonna be my new plaything, it wouldn’t be any fun if you were horrified of the sight of me!”

Marcus’ thoughts were immediately sent spiralling into confusion. Was that really how royalty dressed? And the way he spoke - no matter how good a translation spell might be, it never took puns into account. If the prince knew enough to crack puns in their language - not to mention generally speak so casually - it sort of shot a hole in his theory that he was there to help him learn. So…

Before he could finish a thought, the elf practically threw himself onto Marcus, grinning and draping his arms around the human’s neck, pressing their faces so close together that they could practically kiss. “So then mister p-lay-th-ing~” the elf teased, dragging out the word - it was as if he knew what Marcus had been thinking, “you’ve probably got a few concerns about what that means; I hear you barely even asked any questions when offered the job! Weeeelllll…”

He opened his mouth, as if to elaborate further… but if Marcus had been just a hair further back, he’d have noticed something wrong immediately. The elf’s throat had started to swell and bulge... but with their faces pressed together it was just out of sight! Besides, he saw the results soon enough, as a tremendous, ridiculously loud, wet-sounding fart erupted out of the elf’s mouth, accompanied by thick, green gas! It stretched his mouth open wide - and while one would normally think of gas escaping that way as a belch, there was no way of calling this anything but a fart. It sounded like one, it certainly smelled like one… but it was so, so far beyond anything Marcus had seen (or indeed smelled) in his life. Even this close, he couldn’t even make out the elf prince’s face, the gas blocking his attempts, as if he was trying to see through thick, pea-soup!

Marcus had no clue how to even respond to that - nothing in his life had prepared him for a hung elven prince farting in his face; it wasn’t really a situation most people ran into. That aside, even what should’ve been normal reactions - shock, disgust, an attempt to shove the elf off him - were somehow muted, his brain struggling to even process what it should be making him do right now!

“It means you’d better get used to that~”

Hearing that made Marcus groan, the closest thing to a proper reaction he could muster. Something was definitely wrong; his body just didn’t seem to be reacting how he should, and his thoughts were somehow distant, floaty, hard to grasp - even when he tried to concentrate, it was like… well, much like his vision, it was like some kind of thick, green fog in his mind was somehow stopping him from thinking!

Anyone looking would be able to hazard a guess why; the fart cloud wasn’t just hanging around, it was moving, guided by magic, pushing its way into his Marcus’ nostrils, his mouth, his ears, farts filling his skull and surrounding his brain, ensuring thinking was all-but impossible!

“Don’t worry, though. You will. Quickly, too, if this works out alright!”

By the time the prince spoke again, the cloud was clear enough to see his grinning face - and that he’d pulled back a little, dropping his thong to show off his perfect, bubble-butt - and how its cheeks were perpetually kept apart by a thick, puckered asshole that looked like it’d effortlessly swallow up Marcus’ fist. He had plenty of time to look, too - the prince seemed to be enjoying himself, swaying his hips back and forth as he advanced on Marcus, finally pressing his asshole right up to one of the poor human’s nostrils. “Now, just relax! Let all your cares and worries get blown away in a cloud of gas~”

Marcus’ head had almost cleared enough to respond to that - he opened his mouth, hoping the words would come to him as he did… but before any could leave his lips, the prince let loose.

“PPPPFFFFRRRRRRBBBTTTTTTTTTTTTTT”

The fart that burst forth from the elf’s ass put his previous one to shame; whether it was because it actually came from his ass this time, or if more magic was at work, Marcus had no real way of telling - and, frankly, it was hard for him to care right now. The massive magical fart was like a blow to the brain, shattering his thoughts and sending his mind spiralling in a dozen different directions! He shuddered, his whole body giving an involuntary little spasm as the elf’s farts violated his brain; despite the fact that shoving the elf off should’ve been an easy task, given his lithe form, Marcus was barely even in control of his own body, able to do little more than mumble unintelligible garbage.

...And sniff, apparently. He wasn’t sure when he’d started, but after a good few seconds into the prince’s farting, he realized it wasn’t just the prince forcing those farts into his nostrils - he was actively sucking them in! He tried to stop - but the signal just didn’t seem to go from his brain to his nose properly, and he just kept sniffing, snorting… and, in another unwelcome surprise, he realized his pants had started to feel awfully tight around his crotch.

“Why the fuck am I getting hard from this?!”

In his head, those words were about as loud as the fart - but he couldn’t quite get them to his lips! After what felt like a solid minute of mind-melting fart-huffing, the prince sighed with relief and pulled away, grinning at the dazed, stunned look on Marcus’ face. “Hee. Looks like you liked that! Well, part of you did, anyway~” he teased, reaching down to grope Marcus’ dick through his pants for a few moments, before pulling away.

He waited a moment, before his grin widened. “Of course, I’m sure you’re still super eager for the job, and there’s a question that doesn’t really get asked at interview. Most people kiiinda run away when they get asked ‘just how many farts can you suck down’? - that or think we’re joking. You people are so boring,” he teased, his hands making a few motions in the air - and from nothing, producing a length of tube, one end of which branched off into three smaller tubes.

Marcus’ mouth still hung open, struggling to find anything to say. Even without fresh farts shooting into him, the damage seemed to be done - his thoughts were floaty and out of reach, and even when he did manage to get an idea together, making his body actually respond was another matter entirely.

“Nothing to say? ...Or did I go a bit too far…? Oh well, either way! Grab this for me and stick it in your mouth and nose for me, would you?” the prince asked, holding the three-sectioned tube out to Marcus - and to his own shock, he felt his body actually reacting, responding to the elf’s commands, but not his own! The tube was soon firmly lodged in place, stuffed into each nostril, with the largest section gripped between his teeth, while the prince, predictably, shoved the other end up his own butt.

“Hokay! Make sure to brace yourself - and try not to pop! I hate it when my toys break before I’m through with them!” With that, Marcus could only watch in horror as the elf patted his stomach - and it seemed to bulge and expand, rapidly growing, until he looked almost pregnant - pregnant with what Marcus correctly guessed was more fart-gas!

The tube plugging up the elf’s butt muffled the noise somewhat, but there was still an unmistakable “FRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTT….” sound - one that just didn’t seem like it would ever stop, only growing louder and louder, as the hose began to bulge and swell with noxious, bright-green gas! It was easy to watch it, travelling down the length of the tubing towards Marcus’ waiting orifices… and when it finally hit, shooting out into his nostrils and mouth simultaneously, the young man’s eyes rolled up into his head.

The taste and smell were intense beyond belief - the gas was so thick and intense he could actually feel it moving around in his mouth, buffeting his tongue, marking it - he wasn’t sure anything else would ever taste the same again.

Likewise, he didn’t think the smell would ever leave his nose - it almost felt like the fart was violating his nostrils so deeply, it was erasing his ability to recall any other scents from his life! He made a few desperate attempts at thinking of more pleasant things - fresh baked apple pies, flowers and the like - in an attempt to mentally ward off the smell, but he just couldn’t! All he could think about was the overwhelming taste and smell assaulting him!

Once again, much to his own shock, he could feel his dick throbbing and pulsing inside of his pants - but, much more worryingly, a very different sensation came from his stomach. One of fullness, as if he’d just eaten an enormous meal - albeit a meal of pure fart-gas, and one that was still coming just as fast!

Despite his foggy-headedness, sheer panic seemed to finally move him, enabling him to wave his hands at the elf, trying to tell him he was full, to stop - but that only seemed to make him grin, and push even harder!

Marcus looked down, and shuddered as he saw his shirt starting to lift up, his tummy beginning to bulge and swell… and as the second, redoubled wave of fartgas came surging into him, its growth rapidly accelerated! Within a few short seconds, a loud “RRRIP” announced his pants’ failure to keep his stomach in check, and the shredded remains fell away, letting his erect, dripping dick spring free!

Had his mouth not been full of tube and farts, he’d probably have groaned in humiliation at the sight of that - but he had difficulties making any kind of sound right now! His stomach already looked bigger than the elf’s - if he had looked pregnant, Marcus looked like there were quadruplets inside of him, and more were on their way!

He shuddered, a small, almost cheerful-sounding pop! Coming from his midriff, as his ‘innie’ navel gave way and popped out - followed by the sound of mischievous laughter from his ‘host’, along with the constant, unrelenting sound of farting growing even louder!

The next wave of farts that hit came without mercy; hitting his already overstuffed belly… and somehow altering the way in which he swelled. Until now, his belly had just grown outwards, as if he’d been pumped full of magical, farty  kids - but somehow, he now seemed to be bloating out in all directions, his torso steadily starting to lose its definition, blowing up and rounding out like a balloon!

Neither his shirt, nor the chair he’d been sat in this whole time had been designed to cope with this - as his hips surged outwards, they dug into the chair’s arms for a moment, only to shatter them, filled-flesh apparently beating out wood, while his rapidly-rounding torso tore through his shirt like paper, leaving him effectively naked - shoes and socks did very little to preserve his modesty. The whole chair collapsed after that, making Marcus fall forwards and land on his bloated, swollen stomach… and as he did, some of that enormous buildup of gas finally escaped!

“FFFFFPPPBBBTTTTTTTTTmp!”

The overwhelming, blissful sensation of letting out some of that fart that had bloated his insides was cut short, a magically conjured cork appearing and lodging itself in his asshole, plugging him up!

“No, no, no cheating! Just for that… well, you’d better brace yourself! This next one’s going to make everything look like kid stuff up ‘til now!”

“You’ve got to be kidding!” Marcus thought - right up until the elf really let rip. Even plugged up as his ass was, the fart sound was tremendous, actually hurting Marcus’ ears - as well as making the tube swell to the point of absurdity. It looked as though a beachball had somehow gotten stuffed into the tube - followed by another, and another, until they all merged together into one constant flow of fart, that swelled the thing up to what should’ve been breaking point!

Naturally, Marcus couldn’t do much about it other than stare as they approached, trying to convince himself none of it was real - only to have his whole body violently shudder as the farts reached him, and forced him to recognize that they very much were! Each of his nostrils felt like they were being fisted, while his jaw hurt from being forced to stretch - and stretch way, way further than it should’ve been able to. Honestly, it was amazing nothing was broken - it was probably more of the elf’s magic, ensuring his little plaything didn’t get broken too easily!

With this, Marcus’ rate of expansion shot up. It took a scant few seconds before his ballooning body lifted his head and arms up away from the floor, to the point he could no longer reach it with his arms or his legs - and it seemed that even THEY weren’t safe from the inflation, somehow! Each of his arms and legs felt like farts were somehow stuffing their way down into them, stretching and ballooning them, forcing them to swell up - but his belly was swelling even faster, to the point that even his ballooned-up arms and legs soon seemed to get subsumed into it, swallowed up by the great ball-like mass his body had become!

In some ways, his dick had it the worst; somehow, against all logic, that was the one thing that wasn’t vanishing into the great ball his body had become, but that just made his shameful, raging erection all the more visible! Even now it was twitching and jumping, as if about to cum - because somehow, despite the humiliation, despite the terrifying creaking sounds his flesh made as it was forced to expand beyond the point of absurdity, there was no denying one thing. Somehow, this felt amazing. Physically, at least - it was by far the most overwhelmingly erotic things he’d ever felt! He really didn’t know how to feel about that; he’d been trying to avoid thinking about it, but the way his dick pulsed and throbbed made it impossible to ignore - and his distraction thinking about that caused him to miss the prince intensifying his farts yet again!

The surge of growth was just too much to take. With a helpless moan - that was completely lost in the massive  fart blasting into his mouth, admittedly - Marcus’ oversized body jiggled, and he came! Thick ropes of jizz shot out of his dick, blasting out over the underside of his belly… something the elf didn’t fail to notice.

A few short seconds later, the farting stopped - and seconds later, when the last of the gas made its way through the tube into Marcus’ body, so did the overwhelming swelling sensation. Not that it made a huge difference, at this point - his neck had already vanished into his orb-like body, leaving his head sticking out of a huge fleshy ball, staring down at a floor that had to be a few feet below - and with the knowledge that his head was only halfway up his ludicrously swollen form!

“Well, that’s new. You’re fun… I think I will keep you!” the elf announced, grinning, snapping his fingers - and as he did, a copy of him just seemed to appear from thin air, effortlessly floating up in front of Marcus’ helpless face. “I’m gonna give you the night to settle in like that, let your body get used to stretching - so we can take it waaaay further tomorrow. My little duplicate will take good care of you and make sure you’re not too bored - seeing as you love my farts enough to cum from them, he’ll make sure you have plenty!”

He grinned, starting to head out of the room, only to pause - then bursting out laughing, at a sudden realization. “Man, I never even told you my name, did I? You didn’t even ask my name before you started huffing my farts~” he teased - and if Marcus had any complaints about that particular version of events, he didn’t manage to get them out of his mouth before the elf’s clone tugged the tubing out of his mouth and nose, only to turn around and start farting more thick, green gas straight into his face, surrounding his head with a cloud of the stuff in an instant, conveniently drowning out any retorts he might’ve made… all while the original elf, still laughing, headed out to attend to something else.

[weirdlewdstories]

What do you think about this. So pretty much a student comes in after school or whatever and his teacher(male also like 60 ) ends up convincing the student to do wierd things. Like hyper scat, fart vomit smegma sloppy kissing. I like your stories and I don’t know why I came up with this one but do you think this would be a good story?

It’s not really my cup of tea, sorry! I’m generally more a fan of younger, twink-ish kinda guys; there are some exceptions, but I’m generally not a fan of particularly old characters. (Not that 60 is /super/ old, but it’s old enough to make me kinda go ‘ehhh...’)

[sexthehex]

Wow, I have no idea what I did but a spambot army seems to be clogging the notes on my latest story. Anyone know a way to deal with this / avoid this happening again?

Edit: Yeah, blocked anyone with a weirdo name like boobs-big-sensual. Hope that culls this somewhat.

[weirdlewdstories]

One thing I’ve found is that you get a lot of porn spambots if you have ‘NSFW’ early on in the tags (like, I feel like they only seem to check the first few tags of stuff for it, or something)

[weirdlewdstories]

Why haven't you posted in a while though, everything okay?

A lot of the usual reasons for internet people going quiet, honestly; depression, concern over the way Tumblr handles NSFW blogs, feeling my shit isn’t up-to-par - lately, whenever I start writing something, I’d get a few paragraphs in, wind up going “who the fuck would even enjoy this?”, then giving up :V

Aside from that mess, though, yeah, I’m alright thanks. Been semi-considering moving to a different platform, to at least remove my concern over tumblr’s seemingly random banning of nsfw blogs, but I’m not sure if it’d make a difference/if there’s a particularly good one for it, etc

[weirdlewdstories]

Are you alive?

Braaaaaaains

[weirdlewdstories]

Do you think you'll open commissions again eventually?

To be honest, I’m not sure. I’m at a point in my life right now where I’m lucky enough to not be desperate for money just to get by, and I find writing for money incredibly stressful; I have some serious issues with anxiety, and writing for money stresses me out immensely, which is a big part of why it didn’t last all that long. There’re some other issues I have with doing it, as well, but the end result is that I just struggle with it a great deal.

I’m more likely to do stories in exchange for pervy art, or just because I get particularly inspired by an idea, than for actual money.

[weirdlewdstories]

Hyper-Soiling, also shit-flation

So, I’m still alive, and still doing things! It’s a Christmas miracle. This year’s been... interesting, both on a general level, and a personal one - I’m sorry I’ve been ignoring asks and stuff, I’ve just been crazy busy/unwell.

I’ll get around to poking at some of the asks/etc I received in a little while, but uh, until then, have a story I wrote as a Christmas present...

And started it last year, for some idea of how long it took. Eesh. Features some Farting, Hyper scat, hyper soiling, and unwanted scat inflation. Enjoy, if you’re into that! Prooobably don’t read it you’re not.

It’d been over a week since Jamie’s partner for the science fair had talked him into becoming the experiment, and he still regretted it. Just the thought of what it meant for him was enough to make his cheeks burn! Mark, the boy he was working with, was undeniably a genius; he’d come up with an idea for a small device that, when ingested by a person, could convert excess energy, fat, etc to all kinds of other matter. They could use it to get more buff, grow their genitals, repurpose fat into energy with none of the usual negative consequences… or, as Mark had been eager to ramble on about, they could produce near-limitless quantities of shit.

 For some reason, despite all of the more useful things it could do, Mark had focused mostly on the machine’s ridiculous ability to be absurdly efficient at creating scat. While the seemingly more useful examples took time, and a fair bit of energy, it could  produce shit seemingly without limit, even with only the slightest bit of input - something that Mark had been keen to demonstrate, making Jamie clog a toilet after eating a couple of chips!

 Right now, Jamie’s mind was elsewhere. He’d just about managed to focus his attention on the book he was reading, rather than lamenting the fact that he was just a few minutes into a two-hour train journey, and already bored out of his mind… when a rather different, significantly more intense distraction struck.

 *BRLLGLGGRRRGGHH*

 The sound from his belly was nothing short of obscene, a little gasp escaping his mouth! Mark had the remote to the machine, and it somehow seemed to work pretty much regardless of things like line of sight and distance… but still, he hadn’t expected him to actually USE it! Already, he could feel his bowels starting to throb and fill, shit just seeming to appear from nothing, pumping its way into his bowels!

 “Crapcrapcrapcrap...Mark! Not funny! If you’re doing this, I bet you can hear me somehow - knock it off!”

 For a few moments, the sensations eased up. Jamie could practically feel Mark’s smug, impish grin leering down at him - he had no doubt that he was somehow watching this, leering at a monitor - and after a few moments, the growing pressure inside of him started to increase all over again! It was as if that momentary pause had just been to tease him, and reassure him that Mark really was looking on, and no-doubt enjoying himself as he did!

 “Gnnnrhhhhgnnnoooo…” Jamie muttered, biting his lip… already, the strain of holding the rapidly-building mass of shit inside was causing sweat to bead on his face, and earning him more than a few odd looks from his fellow passengers. He struggled to his feet, groaning as he felt the weight of his belly; it actually looked like he’d piled on a few pounds just sitting there, and his T-shirt was starting to lift up, away from the waistband of his jeans. He shivered a little, reaching down to brush his hands over his slowly-expanding tummy, groaning again… normally, he was pretty slim, but there was a definite bulge there, now, his once relatively-loose jeans now digging into his waist! Jamie swore under his breath, leaning back into his seat, both hands gripping his swollen stomach… before forcing himself to get to his feet, struggling and waddling over to the train’s restroom. He hated going in public, but he just wasn’t being given an alternative here - if he tried to hold this in, he was going to explode!

 “...What do you mean, out of order?!” he demanded, shouting at no-one as he stared at the sign on the door in utter disbelief, “This is… this can’t be…”

 The little sign on the door wasn’t enough by itself to entirely deter Jamie. Maybe it’d just be gross and messy in there, but the door wouldn’t be locked… but after a spirited effort of rattling the handle, tugging, pulling and shoving, he was forced to concede, groaning as he returned to his seat - his stomach hurt like hell, but maybe, just maybe, he’d be able to hold off until the train’s next stop. He’d have to get on another train afterwards, but maybe…

 *GGGGGRRRRRBLLLGGGRHHHH*

 With another unholy gurgle from his bowels, it became obvious that wasn’t an option, either! He had to go, and he had to go now! Maybe he could-

 Wherever that thought had been going, he never quite got to finish it. Mark had, apparently, gotten bored of giving Jamie any hope of holding on, and pressed a button that made everything that had happened so far seem like child’s play! Before Jamie’s very eyes, his belly bloated and swelled, going from just having a noticeable bump, to starting to look like he was actually pregnant in just a few seconds… before he was forced to finally give up on holding it in.

 With a helpless, embarrassed cry, Jamie toppled forwards, clutching at his stomach with one hand, flinging the other out to grab onto a pole or something, trying, desperately to stay standing as he felt his asshole stretch… and give way, right in front of a train car packed full of people!

 *BBBFFFFFFFFRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTTTPPPFFFFFF*

 As if even his asshole was determined to make sure that no-one in the carriage missed what he was doing, a tremendous, ear-splitting fart erupted from his butt, filling the air with sound, green gas visibly billowing out of his pants - and for a single, blissful moment, he thought that that might be all it was. Just a huge, ridiculous fart - the biggest one he’d ever taken, sure, and deeply embarrassing, but better than the alternative.

 That hope lasted all of half a second, before the long, thick log that had built up inside of him started to escape! The fart had stretched his asshole a bit, but it still felt ridiculously, obscenely thick, forcing the hole wider and wider - from the get-go, it was thicker than his dick, and it only kept getting worse, and worse, and worse! Within seconds, he could feel the obscene, squishy sensation of shit building up in his pants, his boxers stretching - and, just a few seconds later, his jeans joined them!

 By now, he could hear gasps of horror from everyone looking at him, but it didn’t make much difference - shit as thick as his wrist was flowing from his ass like a faucet, some of it squeezing down his legs, making his pants bulge out as if he was gaining a lot of weight from the hips down - but most of it was staying in his pants, making them bulge out further and further! By now, anyone looking at him would be able to see just what was stretching them out, as the back of his waistband wasn’t even touching his back - they’d be able to look down into the ridiculous, coiled mass of shit that filled the poor boy’s underwear!

 “Mmnhghhhh… hhhhhnnnhhghhh… guhhh... “ was about the most… coherent thing that Jamie could get out, his whole body trembling as he struggled to hold himself upright. The sensation of shitting like this was absolutely, mind-numbingly overwhelming. For a few moments, the wonderful feeling of release, the sensation of his asshole stretching, and just that wonderful, relaxing sensation that a person could only get from a truly, utterly satisfying shit; all of these sensations washed over him, making him forget where he was, lost in a sea of what could only be described as a wonderful, mind-melting ass-gasm…

 ...Right before reality snapped back in around him, and he remembered that he was, in fact, shitting his pants in front of dozens of people. And, worse? Now he had an absolutely raging erection while doing it! He’d experimented a bit with his butt before, but never really gotten anything thicker than a finger in there - and now, it was like this shit was reverse-fucking his ass as it escaped, and at this point, it was as thick as a baseball bat!

 He shuddered with humiliation, turning towards the crowd… “I’mmmm showwyyy… it’sh… not my…” he mumbled, slurring his words, barely able to talk… and after a few seconds, he cried out, his face contorting into a ridiculous, lewd expression - the shit coming from his ass had nearly doubled in thickness, abruptly, and the sensation of that sickeningly thick log forcing its way out of his ass, despite being almost as thick around as his thigh, was just too much for him to take! In front of all of those people, his dick gave a throbbing, violent twitch… then started pumping thick, sticky ropes of jizz into his jeans and boxer shorts! With how taut his pants had been stretched by all of that shit, it was incredibly obvious what was happening - everyone could see every twitch of his bulge, and watch as his jizz splattered through his pants, oozing out everywhere!

 His legs finally gave out, the poor boy falling forwards… and landing on his swollen belly, which only made that shit pump out faster! It was turning into a brown mountain, stretching his pants out more and more… until, with an unholy RRRRRIP, his jeans gave way! His boxers remained intact, somehow, stretched out obscenely, full of more shit than boy - but his jeans had just given up on their attempt to hold that ridiculous mass, and fell away. As a result of his position, everyone could see straight into his boxers, and even watch as more and more shit just pumped out of the poor boy’s butt, stretching them further and further…

 “Mark… going… to… fucking… killll… youuuuu…” he mumbled, drooling as he spoke, shuddering, his dick still twitching and spasming as he lay there. The worst of it was over, now, most of the shit had escaped - some small bits were still pushing their way out, but that was about it. Of course, he still had to actually get to his destination, and hope and pray he wasn’t about to get thrown off the train - and he didn’t have any more pants! All of those thoughts swirled through his head as he lay there, only semi-awake after what had just happened, but he struggled to focus on any individual one. Instead, his mind was focused on one thing. Revenge.

 -=-=-=-=-=-=-

 “So, we’re all good, right?”

 “...No, we are not all good, Mark! You paying off the fines you caused does not in any way make up for… everything else! Destroying my pants, and, y’know, making me shit myself in front of dozens of people! You didn’t even bring a change of pants to the train station!”

 “Hey, hey, I told you! I’d figured you’d just pull your pants down out of the way! And how was I to know the bathroom would be out of order?”

 “...I’m… pretty sure you were watching…” Jamie muttered, grumbling and folding his arms over his chest… while Mark just grinned.

 “Well… maybe I was, maybe I wasn’t. You still could’ve pulled your pants down! Not like you had anything to lose at that point - squatting on the floor and shitting can’t have been much worse than… well, the scene you made~”

 Jamie’s glare made the little scientific genius look away, awkwardly.

 “Look, look, I’m sorry, alright? I started experimenting, and it got a bit out of hand - you’re still getting a free A out of this, and I’ll tell ‘em you did a good bit of the work, so...  don’t complain TOO much, alright? Anyway, I’m gonna go grab a drink! Want anything?”

 Jamie could only stare, open-mouthed at Mark as he spoke, watching as he shrugged and left the room - people said geniuses could be odd, but Mark really did take the cake. Still, it seemed like he really did consider the matter settled - he left the room, leaving Jamie alone in there, and… yes! He’d left the remote behind!

 Jamie grabbed it, grinning from ear to ear as he tugged off the fresh pants he was wearing - while Mark hadn’t brought any to the train station, he’d been ‘gracious’ enough to lend him some spare pants and underwear once they got back to his place, but they’d only get in the way of what Jamie had in mind.

 He fiddled with the remote, pressing a few buttons, shuddering as he felt that familiar sensation building up inside of himself once again… already, he could feel his belly giving a gurgle…

 A glorp…

 *Bbbbrbbgllgllllrplppppp*

 That unholy, deep rumbling from his stomach made Jamie groan, wondering for a moment if he’d been a bit too hasty… but, fortunately for him, the door opened up, Mark walking through it with a can of soda a moment later - only to freeze at the sight of the half naked, bloated-bellied Jamie, with remote in hand!

 Before he could even open his mouth to ask what was going on, Jamie barreled into him, sending him sprawling… then, with an evil grin, seating himself on his face!  “Nnghh… you know… at first, I thought I’d be fine with just putting up with stuff; I’d keep quiet, get my grade, move on with life… but after that last stunt? Fuck that! I’m going to give you a taste of how my pants felt!”

 Mark’s eyes widened in horror, and, without thinking, he opened his mouth to protest… which naturally resulted in Jamie’s asshole winding up lodged against it! The ridiculous, hyper-shitting he’d been through earlier had stretched and altered it quite considerably, turning the once normal hole into a thick, swollen ring, stretched-out ring of flesh - one that was now shoved firmly into the mouth of the scientist that’d caused all of his problems. “Mmnghh… hope you’re… ready… because here… it…” he started - but never really got to finish.

 His belly gave a great, gurgling rumble… and once again, the wonderful, overwhelming sense of utter release that flowed through his body, as thick logs of shit began to flow out of his asshole, totally overwhelmed him! The words he’d meant to say died on his lips, lost in a loud, helpless moan; unlike on the train, he felt absolutely no need to restrain himself here, no need to hold himself back and attempt to avoid showing just how fucking good this felt - so he just let himself loose, moaning loud enough to be heard in the street as thick logs of shit flowed into his unfortunate victim’s throat!

 His already-stretched asshole was able to pump out obscenely thick logs of shit from the get-go… and they only had one place to go. Mark’s earlier toying with him had left his asshole surprisingly thick and resilient, which had come back to bite Mark in the butt, as it left the hole thick and sturdy enough that he simply couldn’t close his mouth with that hole shoved into it, or pull back from it - he was forced to just accept those horrendous, thick logs of shit that were forced into his mouth!

 Even from the start, they made his cheeks bulge out obscenely… followed by his throat as they went the only path they could, pumping down into him, the huge turds finally settling in his belly! Naturally, it made him want to be sick, but with the force that shit was flowing down into him, his throat might as well have been a one-way street. To add insult to injury, he was forced to actually manually swallow them down faster than they were coming if he wanted any room to breathe… and seemingly every time he did THAT, Jamie’s butt had a reward in store for him.

 *BBBRRMMPPPPPFFFFRRRRRRRRRTTTT*

 Even muffled by Mark’s mouth, Jamie’s farts were LOUD… productive, too, plenty of green ass-gas blasting out of Jamie’s nose every time he had to let rip! “H-Hahh… oh… m-my god… this feels so, so good! You have no idea… u-using you as a toilet’s the best!” he panted, drooling, his tongue hanging out of his mouth!

 He looked down at himself, pouting as he noticed his own belly was deflating rapidly… he’d already pumped out quite a bit of the shit he’d initially put in there. But, fortunately, he had one way of fixing that…

 “S-Sorry, MarkI’d only wanted to do this a little, as payback… but now that I’ve started… I-I don’t wanna stoooopppp…” he mumbled, sounding almost crazed from how good he felt! One hand reached down, grabbing his rock-hard erection, jerking and stroking it relentlessly… while the other hand gripped the remote tighter, jamming a finger down on the button that increased his scat production!

 GRRRMMBLBBBRBGHHHHH…

 His belly rumbled, almost seeming to grumble at him in protest… before starting to fill right back up, more and more shit flowing out of his ass! The logs were only getting thicker by the second, too, forcibly stretching Mark’s mouth open wider and wider - his jaw already felt like it was being distended, and those logs weren’t getting any smaller! On the contrary, even Mark’s throat and neck felt like they were being stretched…

 They weren’t the only thing stretching, either. His poor, once-flat belly was now bulging uncomfortably against his pants, stretching them upwards more and more, his navel poking out through a new gap between jeans and shirt.

 “Mmnn! Nnnghh.. Mmn…” he mumbled, shuddering in humiliation, disgust, and pain - his jeans were REALLY digging into his belly, especially as more and more thick, heavy logs of shit landed in his stomach, forcing it to stretch up more, and more, until…

 With a sudden ping!, that pain on his midsection was relieved all at once, as the button on his jeans gave way, flying into the ceiling with the velocity of a bullet! Now free, his belly seemed to surge up and out of anything that had once contained it, his shirt and pants moving out of the way as it sagged, almost seeming to show itself off. It couldn’t exactly be called spherical - thick shapes seemed to poke out of it, some of the thicker turds inside of him poking at the edges of his tummy, giving it a random, ridged look…

 Jamie couldn’t help but groan at the sight, jerking his cock harder still… “Oh… m-my fucking… god… that’s amazing… how much more can you even take?!” he asked, jamming down on the button again, and again, and again…

 WIth an unholy gurgle from his insides, his asshole stretched once more… and an inhumanly thick log of shit started to simply erupt out into Mark’s mouth, forcing his mouth open wider than ever before! It hurt for a brief moment… followed by a bizarre sense of his jaw being completely and utterly relaxed. To his horror, he realized that his jaw just wasn’t moving anymore - no bones had broken, and it didn’t exactly feel dislocated, given how brief the pain had been… it was more like his mouth was simply gaping, with nothing he could do about it!

 It was probably a good thing, too, because the shit flowing in was thicker than either boy’s head, now, pumping down into his stomach at a truly absurd rate, causing it to swell and bulge, the flesh creaking and groaning… before the swelling started to go in a truly bizarre direction.

 Rather than just pushing his belly up more and more, he actually felt himself starting to… raise up, off the ground somehow! Looking down only confirmed it - the shit was starting to make him swell in all directions! Up, down, around - before his very eyes, his body was stretching and distorting, legs and arms slowly but surely seeming to vanish into distended, shit-swollen flesh!

 This went on for several, long minutes, his body becoming less and less recognizeable by the second, as Jamie masturbated, stroking his dick as he pumped the scientist full of shit… before finally hitting orgasm, moaning in mindless bliss as he splattered the boy’s swollen body with cum, panting and drooling… and seeming to finally come to his senses, blinking sheepishly and slamming a button on the remote, giving another low groan as the flow of shit slowed… and finally came to an end, leaving Jamie twitching and shivering a little as he got up from his… ‘friend’s’... face.

 Mark looked absolutely ridiculous at this point. The slim, fit young man was gone, replaced by what could only be described as a mass of human-coloured skin over a ball of shit! His hands and feet were vaguely visible, but mostly sunk into the mass of flesh, and his mouth hung open, the last of Jamie’s shit hanging out of it - along with Mark’s tongue, funnily enough, the huge log pressed right up against the thing.

 “That’s… that’s uh… a good… look for you?” he said, awkwardly, sheepishly rubbing the back of his head, looking down into Mark’s eyes - he barely even seemed to register what he was saying. The shock and humiliation had likely been a bit too much, and he didn’t seem to be entirely… with it right now.

 “I’ll… uh… I’ll find my own way home, I guess. But hey, at least if the science thing doesn’t work out, we know you make a great toilet!” Jamie teased, sheepishly rubbing the back of his head… before pocketing the remote, and making his way out.

[weirdlewdstories]

Very silly TF-y stuff

I wrote a very silly TF-y story, for a close buddy of mine who shares some of my more... absurd fetishes.

Contains weird transformations, excessive latex, mostly-harmless decapitation, foot play, and ickiest of all (to some people) a GIRL. Truly, the depravity never ends here.

Also it’s written in second person, for those who’d be put off by that.

Today had been a pretty weird day for you. Since going to uni, you’d received a weird call from one of the people who shared your student building, claiming that you’d left your door open, but assuring you they’d shut it for you… then simply calling you a pervert and hanging up. They weren’t the only one acting strange, either; any time you saw one of their friends, they seemed to giggle at you and move away… clearly, you were only going to find out what was going on by heading back to your room.

With classes finished, you did just that, heading home, opening up your door - and finding exactly what all the fuss had been about. Your room looked like some kind of super perverted latex fetishist’s dream - or possibly a nightmare, depending on how far they took it. Everything looked similar to how it had before, just… latex-fied, their colours similar to how they had originally been, but tweaked, changed into incredibly sleek, shiny versions of themselves, from your bed to your chair, carpet to ceiling! About the only thing that remained untouched was your computer… your computer that was currently booted up, someone happily typing away on it, browsing through all your porn.

Before you could even open your mouth to protest, your now-latex chair gave a small squeak, swivelling around so the occupant could face you… and you found yourself face-to-face with Lisa, your impishly grinning little sister. Of course it was her; half the reason you’d wanted to go to university far from home was to get away from her ridiculous antics! She’d been lucky enough to be born with an immense talent for magic, and had channeled all of her considerable talents towards the most absurd, pervy applications she could come up with. She particularly specialized in latex-related shenanigans - a quick glance around your room was all anyone would need to guess THAT - but as the dainty little feet at the end of each of her wrists alluded to, that wasn’t all she was limited to.

As usual, she was clad neck-to-toe in latex, an obscenely tight black bodysuit that completely covered her, but left absolutely nothing to the imagination. Each of her twenty toes were individually wrapped, her nipples were clearly visible through the suit, and it, of course, dug right into her pussy, showing it off perfectly.

“Hey, bro! I got bored at home, so I thought I’d come visit! Like what I did with the place?”

She just grinned at you as you spluttered, and tried to find the words to protest - before getting to her feet, moving over to you, placing the toe of one of her foothands over your lips, silencing your complaints.

“Shh, shh. We both know you do really! Who wouldn’t like this?” She gestured vaguely around with her free foot, making a quick, subtle gesture to close the door behind you, then gently pushing you over to the bed. “That said, though, I really missed having you around! You’re so fun to tease and play with… and looking through your PC, I think I finally figured out why you left! I bet you must’ve been super pissed, watching me try out all this silly, lewd magic, but never really changing YOU, right?” she teased, grinning from ear to ear.

When you shook your head, starting to protest, she just laughed it off, giggling impishly and running one of her toes down your front. “Shhh, shh. It’s okay! No-one’s judging you for being a peeervert~! Well, yet. Except the people who saw your room, maybe? Eh, whatever, you’ll have more fun if you just relax!”

When her toe reached your crotch, she pulled her foothand back, giving a small, satisfied nod… for reasons that quickly became apparent, as your clothes disintegrated down the line she’d drawn with her toes! The magic seemed to spread through them, shredding fabric as it went, leaving you butt-naked in a matter of seconds!

She pressed her advantage, moving herself forwards and squishing her crotch against yours, grinding her latex-clad pussy against your crotch, flashing you a playful smirk as she felt something starting to stiffen between your legs. “It really doesn’t do you much good to claim you don’t want something when your body so clearly does…” she purred, reaching up with both of her foothands, slipping them into your hair, and pulling you into a deep kiss.

She seemed absolutely determined to not even give you a chance to speak, let alone put up much of a fight, her crotch continuing to relentlessly grind against yours as she made out with you. Little by little, though, something started to change… bit by bit, the feel of latex against flesh started to change, particularly for your foreskin, and a squeaky, rubbery sound began to fill the air…

As she noticed that, too, she pulled back with a self-satisfied smirk, letting you glance down at what was happening. It almost looked like some of her latex outfit had rubbed off on you, sticking to your foreskin… but her outfit was most definitely intact. Worse, the little bits of latex that seemed stuck to you seemed to be moving and spreading! Your foreskin was turning a dark, yet very shiny black before your very eyes… and with every beat of your heart, it seemed to spread faster, your cock soon entirely wrapped up in black latex, the changes beginning to spread to your balls, and your hips!

For the first time since your sister’s arrival, you were given enough time to actually talk. “...W...What… what did you DO?! Please tell me this isn’t going to last too lo-”

“Oh, don’t start that. We both know you just want to hear how permanent it is~” she teased, cupping your cheek with one of her soles, her smirk turning from impish to devilish, “You don’t have to worry about that, though. I’m all too happy to tell you that there’s no going back once this process starts. Just about every bit of your body will soon be beautiful latex - enjoy your last few moments of fleshiness!”

Good as her word, the latex spread and spread, spreading out through your crotch to cover your hips entirely! The sensation of it spreading was incredibly sensual, like a latex-gloved hand gently caressing you from both the inside and out, corrupting and converting your body with the lightest of touches. You could feel bones shifting and changing inside of you, your body feeling oddly uniform beneath, as though there was no bones, organs, or anything else nestled in your lower body now, just solid latex! It seemed to be giving you quite the makeover as it spread, too; your butt ballooned out, giving you glorious latex orbs, that jiggled and bounced with the slightest movement…

Far from stopping at your hips, the changes spread downwards, your legs becoming as gorgeous and shapely as they were sleek, your feet similarly becoming dainty and girly, naturally arching slightly  as if you were wearing high heels!

Any protests you might’ve had were rather difficult to get out, as your sister was working to keep you distracted! The squeaky sound of latex-on-latex filled the air as her latex-clad foothands squeezed your cock between their soles, rubbing up and down, letting your stretchy, latex foreskin stroke over the sensitive, still-fleshy head of your cock. That in itself felt a little strange, though; your fleshy dick felt just wrong nestled inside of your latex foreskin. You could quite distinctly feel every inch of your member, and how it was quite separate from the latex skin it was wrapped in; you could even feel it going back into your crotch, a hole passing through your latex hips to allow for it.

Rather than giving you much time to think on that, the changes continued to progress, that sensual, stroking sensation spreading up from your hips, now that your legs were all done with. With every inch it passed over your torso, you could feel flesh turning to latex, both inside and out, your insides feeling strange and alien as they became nothing but solid rubber inside of you. Your stomach churned for a moment, before falling silent. For a few moments, you found yourself desperately gasping for breath, your lungs changing, becoming less and less useful, before finally fading away entirely, leaving you entirely unable to breathe, but also without any kind of need to! The latex didn’t give you much time to get used to the unusual lack of sensation, seeming to actually speed up in spreading, reaching up to your chest, your heart hammering for a moment, then, just like your lungs, falling still and being converted to yet more latex!

It spread all the way up to your neck, the changes gliding down your arms like a set of gloves slowly rolling down from your shoulders, gliding down to cover your hands, converting flesh and bone as they went. It was impossible to tear your eyes away from the changes as they progressed… and while it had been tough to notice initially, it seemed that latex-fication wasn’t all that was going on.

Your arms felt more slim and dainty than ever before, your fingers a little longer, more delicate and gentle… similarly, the rest of your body felt the same. Your waist was a little slimmer, your shoulders less broad, every inch of you looking just a little more feminine - aside from your crotch, of course. Your dick was still there, one of the only bits of flesh left on your body, along with your head, the inside of your penis still wrapped up in latex foreskin.

“There! All done!”

“...What do you mean, all done?! I’m still…” you started, gesturing at your head and crotch, feeling your cheeks heat up a bit as you realized that you were complaining some of your body was still normal! “I-I mean, it’s just… it looks even weirder with things all incomplete like this!”

With a small laugh, your little sister reached up, cupping your cheek with the sole of one of her foot-hands, brushing a hair back from your face. “Silly. I know what you meant~ don’t worry though! I only meant that you were done turning to latex. You’re still not -QUITE- finished.”

As if on cue, the moment she finished talking, a strange surge of sensations rushed  through your crotch, powerful enough to make you reach down and grab your crotch! The surge was accompanied by a weird, shifting sensation inside of you, as if you were about to void your bowels… but that had to be impossible! You didn’t even HAVE bowels anymore, let alone any of the filth that had been inside of them. There was only one thing nestled inside of your crotch. One of the few pieces of flesh remaining on your body. Your dick. Right as that thought dawned on you, another surge hit your crotch, forcing a groan from your lips!

“Hee. Enjoying yourself~?”

As you opened your mouth to answer, another surge hit, followed by another, and another! The urge to just push was growing more and more desperate and insistent… it felt like you were actually forcing your body to hold your dick in, while it desperately tried to reject it! Unfortunately, while you could only hold on so hard, there seemed no limit to how desperate your body could get… and soon, despite your best attempts, you felt your latex insides starting to give an involuntary PUSH!

Before your eyes, your cock started sliding out of your foreskin, like solid, fleshy toothpaste squeezed out of a latex tube! No matter how badly you wanted to hold it in, or how horrified you might’ve wanted to feel, as it came out, there was only one thing you could focus on: how utterly, mind-numbingly incredible it felt! The orgasmic sensation of your cock being stroked in ways that no normal person would ever feel combined with the incredible sense of relief and release, as if your crotch had been constipated your entire life, and only now, you were finally getting it all out.

Soon, your entire cock was piled up on the floor like a thick, fleshy snake, leaving you with an achingly sensitive hole in your crotch. Your latex foreskin remained, totally devoid of a dick, throbbing and begging for attention… attention that you found yourself giving it, like it or not! Your hands moved regardless of your will, reaching down to grab and grope at your latex ‘flesh’, squishing your foreskin together, emphasising how empty it was… before a finger from each hand slipped into it, spreading it open!

“W...Wha… What’m… I…”

Even to you, your voice sounded pretty weak. It was hard to think or talk like this, all of the strength seemed to have gone out of you! Shitting out your cock had been an intense experience, and your sister still seemed to have more stuff in mind!

“Oh, don’t worry about it! I can do more than just make latex; I can control it in all kinds of fun ways, too! Your body’s like a big controllable plaything for me~” LIsa teased, grinning at the quick flash of disbelief on your face. “I knew you wouldn’t think it’d be THAT easy for me to take control of you. But you’d be wroooo~ng!”

As if to demonstrate that, your hands began to shift again, spreading themselves a little further apart, stretching your foreskin wider… before one began to move in, starting to finger-fuck your empty crotch, making orgasmic bursts of pleasure radiate out from there! The only trouble was, without any kind of genitals, there was no way for you to get any kind of release, the pleasure just made you more and more desperately horny, until you were weak at the knees, whimpering like an animal in heat!

“Bet you believe me now~” she teased, laughing as you nodded, desperate to get some control over your limbs back… but instead, you found yourself leaning forwards from your knelt position, watching as she raised a latex-clad foot… then thrusting your face into it, mashing up against her toes! “Gimme a kiss for an apology, and we’ll call it even~”

You weren’t exactly given much of a choice; after a few, long seconds, it became clear she wasn’t joking, so you planted a tentative, gentle kiss on the bottom of her foot. She didn’t move. After another few long seconds of waiting, you tried again, making it last a little longer… again, nothing.

It took almost a good minute of toe-sucking, kissing and tongue-worship  before she finally pulled her foot off your face, “Okay! Stand up, hands out.” She said, the command making your body immediately respond, letting you clamber to your feet, doing as she’d asked, holding your hands out for her, letting her thrust something into them. A quick glance down showed you it was a squishy, artificial pussy, contained in a hard plastic shell - an onahole. Before you could even wonder what it was for, she made a quick gesture, and your hands moved, reaching down and shoving the onahole into your foreskin, the pleasure making your knees tremble again - but this time, you weren’t allowed to fall down!

Your hands pushed and pushed, forcing your foreskin to stretch around it, the plastic slowly but surely getting shoved into place, stretching your crotchhole obscenely wide, before finally seeming to almost ‘click’ into place, your foreskin wrapping around the outside, completely concealing the shell, leaving you looking like your foreskin was just some kind of weird, pocket-pussy sheath - and of course, Lisa was all too happy to reach down, teasingly probing it with her toes, letting you feel how the slightest movement of it within your crotch sent shocks of pleasure right through you!

“Fun, huh? Artificial genitals for an artificial boy~ ...Not that you’re really much of a boy anymore.” She stuck her tongue out at you, grinning at the breathless look of annoyance on your face, reaching up to cup your face in her soles, pulling you down into a quick kiss. “Oh, don’t look at me like that. We’re almost finished with you… and you wouldn’t want your last look to be one of annoyance, would you?”

“...Last? What? You’re not-”

She blinked, before laughing, cutting you off and waving with one foothand, “Oh, no! No no no, I’m not going to kill you, silly,” she said, letting you breathe a sigh of relief, “...Just behead you. You’ll be fine! Wouldn’t be fair to the rest of your organs if you still had your brain, after all!”

With a snap of her… toes… (quite how she’d taught herself to do that, or why she’d bothered, was a mystery best left unexplored) a guillotine appeared in the center of your room! She’d always been good at conjuring things, and, like most things she conjured, the thing largely appeared to be made of latex, from the stocks, to the frame, to the rope… unfortunately, the one exception was the blade! “Just slot yourself in, alright? I want to prepare something~”

“No! It’s not alright!” you protested, finally managing to splutter out a genuine complaint, “I can’t survive without my head!”

“You’re doing just fine without a heart or lungs! What makes you think that’ll be any different?”

“I-I-” you started, only to realize that the argument was something of a mute point; with or without your consent, your body was moving to obey, walking over to the guillotine, pulling the stocks open, and slotting your head through… then pushing your arms along with it! They were specially designed to slot through your head and arms simultaneously, pushing them in all the way up to the shoulders. The position was pretty uncomfortable, requiring you to bend your arms around a bit, and stretch them right up; it was a good thing you had the flexibility of rubber, and none of those silly things like bones most people had to worry about to get in the way!

With another little grin, Lisa moved around in front of you, your cock trapped between her feet, letting you watch as she started changing it! Thick, floppy flesh started to warp and change, stiffening up, becoming more translucent, turning into a huge, soft silicone dildo! “It’s only fitting, right? A boy-toy like you should have a toy for a dick~” she teased, rubbing the head against your lips, then laughing and pulling it back, a strange harness appearing at her crotch with a wave of her hand, letting her hook your transformed dick right on there.

That done, she walked around behind you, and started teasingly grinding your own silicone dick up against your artificial pussy, giggling as the slightest movement brought adorable, soft whimpers of pleasure forth from your lips. “You sound like an upset puppy! Don’t feel so bad~ it’s not like you can help being a big, naughty peeervert, big bro~”

“I am NOT! I-I’m not the one who did all of this to myself!”

“You are the one who’s moaning their way their way through it, having the time of their life, though~”

“I’m not! Y-You’re just… it’s not my fault you make it feel too good!”

“It only feels this good ‘cause you’re the sort of pervert who fantasizes about this stuff! Honestly. Well, whatever. I’m sure the truth will come out soon~”

“What’s that supposed t-”

That last sentence was one you never quite managed to finish. With a sudden, swift movement, Lisa positioned herself… and rammed your own strapon-fied dick right into the onahole she’d stuffed into your crotch. The sensation was absolutely incredible; you didn’t feel anything from the onahole itself, admittedly, but every movement in your crotch felt almost absurdly good! Spikes of pleasure just kept shooting into your brain, making you feel better and better with each thrust she made… and she’d only just gotten started.

“S-Sissss… quit… quiiitiitttt…” you mumbled, a small line of drool leaking out of your mouth as your sister pulled back, then thrust again, slamming her hips against yours, almost dislodging the onahole serving as your genitals! “I-It feels… feels good… but I’m not… not gonna admit I want to lose my head…”

“Oh~? You won’t admit it? So you do want it, you just don’t wanna say it~? You want your little sis to take your head off, and turn you into nothing but a latex plaything… it’s just too embarrassing for you to say out loud~?”

Your cheeks flushed at that, and you fell silent - which only seemed to egg Lisa on, urging her to thrust away at you harder and faster, plunging your own dick into you over and over again! It really wasn’t fair; this was better than any sex you’d had, or even imagined! Better than masturbation, better than… anything you could think of! And yet, no matter how badly you wanted to, you just couldn’t quite seem to cum…

For what felt like hours, Lisa just kept on railing away at you relentlessly. In reality, it was probably only a few minutes, but it was impossible to keep track of time like this. It was so hard to think, so hard to do anything other than moan in mindless bliss…

“...Do… do itt….”

“Do whaaat big bro~?”

“...L-let… let the… blade fall… cut me up… I-I wanna… I wanna be a toy!”

Lisa grinned, pausing slightly, pulling your dick back ,almost all the way out. “Oh~? You’ve changed your tune just a bit. Weren’t you saying earlier you wanted your head?” She giggled, thrusting again, plunging your cock back into you, giggling at your moan. “Are you suuuure it’s what you want~? You want every last trace that you’re a real person taken off you?” she asked, pulling back, thrusting again, “You want your entire body to be something I can take control of at a moment’s notice?” Another pause, another thrust, “...You want to be your pervy little sister’s living plaything~?”

The thrust that came after that seemed to actually dislodge the onahole a bit, pushing it deeper inside of you, before it shifted back into place, eliciting a helpless, needy moan from your lips, that you just knew your flatmates would be able to hear. “Y-YESSSS! I need… I neeeeed ittttt… please! Please cut off my heaaaaad...”

“Well. What kind of monster would I be to say no to a request like that~?” There was a definite triumphant note in Lisa’s voice, and a huge grin on her face as she pointed towards the blade… and watched it fall down, plummeting towards your neck and arms - then gliding through them like they weren’t even there, an enormous burst of pleasure seeming to flood through your entire body!

You couldn’t cum… but your crotch seemed determined to try, the hole spasming and throbbing, twitching and pushing, almost forcing the onahole stuffed into it back out! The only thing stopping it was having Lisa thrust it back in, continuing to fuck you as your entire body rocked and convulsed, wracked by the most intense feeling of pleasure you’d experienced in your life - and, thanks to the lack of orgasm, kept right there, on the very edge of actually getting some relief!

It was incredibly hard to think, or indeed notice anything like this; you felt far, far too good to do that! Your head had completely ceased responding in any way, lying uselessly on the floor, ensuring you couldn’t see anything anymore… not normally, at least. Somehow, despite the lack of ears and eyes, you still had a vague sense of things around you; you could still hear, smell, and sort of tell where people and things were, in a radius around yourself.

You could even ‘see’ the playful smirk on Lisa’s face as she pulled away from you, letting your strapon-cock drop to the floor, leaving your onahole crotch tingling and aching from how much it had gone through. She urged you to straighten up, letting you do it yourself, now, rather than forcing you… before grabbing your shoulders, letting you feel just how sensitive they were, grinning as the shock of pleasure from her groping them sent you right back down to your knees! She continued her relentless molestation, giggling as you started humping at the ground with your silly little onahole crotch, raising one of her actual feet and pressing it to where your neck had been, intensifying the pleasure tenfold!

As she kept you busy, some small latex tentacles emerged from the floor, grabbing your head and arms, carting them outside to toss in the apartment complex’s waste disposal, all while your sister groped your neck with her toes, pulling them back as a small, rubber ring formed up right where your neck had been - a rubber ring that she quickly clipped a leash to.

“There! Finally done. Took a while, because of how you wouldn’t stop complaining, but you’re finally a silly, latex toy, for the rest of your life. Time to go show you off around town~!” she said, brightly, setting off with a huge grin, tugging you along after her, forcing you out of the door. Ready or not, it was time for you to face the first day of the rest of your life~

[weirdlewdstories]

Commission - Fart-Hookah Inflation

Commission for Octoboy! Also doing a slight change in pricing due to some realizations. It’ll actually be (marginally) cheaper to commission me now.

For those wondering wtf a Fart Hookah is, see:

http://octoscrazystation.tumblr.com/post/118731434866/fart-hookah-inflation

http://octoscrazystation.tumblr.com/post/134235501946/more-fart-hookah-inflation

“Finally! I’ve been waiting FOREVER for this thing to get here!” Roy announced, talking to himself as he grabbed the package waiting on his doorstep, taking it inside and up to his room as fast as he could. It’d been about a week since he’d ordered his fart hookah online, but the time waiting had felt like forever! He’d made things worse for himself by watching videos of other people using them, constantly reminding him that his wasn’t here yet, but at least he had a pretty good idea of what to expect.

Within a few seconds, he had the thing unpackaged and sitting on the floor of his bedroom, and tugged off his clothes with similar speed, leaving him butt-naked. He couldn’t help but pause there for a moment, looking at himself in the mirror… he had to admit, he looked pretty good. With his generally slim build, and his cute, but still boyish face framed by an unruly mass of brown hair, it wasn’t too hard to see why people constantly hit on him… though that thought made him grin a bit, reaching down to rub his flat, washboard-like tummy. “Won’t be that way all that much longer, huh?”

He glanced at the hookah on the floor, shaking his head… “God, I’m such a weirdo doing this…  hah. Whatever, right?” He grinned, moving over to the hookah, taking the simple-looking contraption of glass and brass, and pressing his asshole up against the hose sticking out of it. “S’gonna be fun. If people think I’m weird for it, who cares?”

With that, he grunted and strained, pushing and squeezing… and letting out a great sigh of relief as he felt his bowels shifting.

*FRRRRBBbbBbbBbbbrtttttt*

The sound filled the air, mingling with his sigh of relief… but there was no kind of smell or anything. The reason for THAT was simple; as he’d let rip, he’d squeezed down on a small part of the hose, ensuring it sucked up every bit of his fart! The gas never reached the air, simply getting caught up in that tube, and sucked into the glass orb at the center of the hookah.

That done, all he really had to do was wait. He had no idea how these things worked, but once they got a taste of ass-gas, they were supposed to produce endless amounts of it… and just a quick glance told him that his was already doing just that. The glass chamber that had been full of an entirely clear fluid just a few moments ago was already starting to bubble and turn a bright, vivid green. Each bubble that popped inside of it sounded like a tiny fart, making Roy’s dick throb with delight. As far as he knew, there wasn’t any way to really turn this thing off… his room was gonna be full of interesting sounds from now on.

‘Course, that was the least of the fun he was going to have with this thing. As soon as he spotted fartbubbles popping inside of it, he grabbed the tube again, raising it up to his lips… and making the same rookie mistake every perv that gets their hands on one of these makes at first.

He took -way- too deep a breath for someone who hadn’t practised.

A huge bubble of fartgas made its way up the hose towards his waiting mouth, and in an instant, he went from his mouth being empty, to his cheeks being forcibly bulged out by the stuff! He could feel it stretching his throat as it passed down, as if he was getting a rough throatfucking from a huge fart; a thought that made his dick twitch again, thick gobs of precum drooling from the tip!

Still, all that gas had to go somewhere, and with the breath he’d taken, there wasn’t really enough room in his lungs for all of it, let alone the air that had originally been in there. He felt it rolling around inside of him, pushing the air out… and with a muffled, blissful groan, he felt his sinuses stretching out, along with both nostrils, an enormous fart ripping its way out of his nose! Most of it was gas from the hookah, but the displaced air was mixed in there, too, escaping his body and rushing out of him - even with the air mixed in, though, enough of a fart escaped his nose that a green haze hung in the air around his head.

Around this point, most newbies reeled back, coughing and spluttering, and went back at the hookah with a bit more restraint. Roy was… not most newbies, as it turned out. As soon as his cheeks stopped bulging, he started breathing in again… and again… each time taking a deeper breath than the last, his lungs stretching inside of him as they were forced full of farts, his nostrils almost feeling like they’d been permanently stretched open a bit wider by the sheer force of farts escaping them!

He was dimly aware of his cock spurting and splattering precum all over the hookah, but he was finding it harder and harder to think with each passing moment. His lungs were all-but yelling at him that he needed some actual air… so with a groan of regret, he released the seal his lips had on the hookah, letting out a long breath, the farts in his lungs escaping into the outside air.

When he’d been breathing in earlier, he’d been sucking down the farts so fast he hadn’t really had time to appreciate them… now, though, things were a bit different. He let them slide over his tongue, and breathed deeply from the haze around his head, shivering in pleasure… there was just something delightful about his own farts, somehow. Even after… whatever happened in that hookah, they still felt like they were HIS, and that just seemed to encourage him to breathe nice and deep… before wrapping his lips around the hookah again.

This time, he went in with a bit more self control, and started following along with what he’d seen others do; he sucked gas through the tube a bit at a time, then swallowed, sending it down to his stomach instead of his lungs. Like this, he never really had to break the seal his mouth had on there, he just had to occasionally take breaths through his nose - he still inhaled a fair bit of fart-gas that way, of course, but he got enough oxygen to keep going.

Little by little, he got into a rhythm. Suck, taste, swallow, breath. Suck, taste, swallow, breathe. There was something oddly relaxing about the whole thing, making it incredibly easy to just zone out, one hand holding the hose in place, the other rubbing over his belly.

Occasionally, his belly gave little groans of protest. He could feel the skin there stretching and straining, his once-flat tummy starting to bulge out, getting bigger and bigger with every suck he took… especially as he grew more and more adept at gulping down progressively larger farts.

Little by little, he watched himself grow, grinning around the hose with every suck he took; within just a few short minutes, his tummy had started bulging out like he was pregnant, and he could tell it was only going to get bigger from there!

The stretching felt absolutely incredible. Every gulp he took made him feel better and better… sure, his flesh was straining, but that didn’t change that it felt absolutely amazing, beyond anything he’d felt in his life! His cock was constantly oozing precum all over the place, twitching in excitement between inhalations, then throbbing and pulsing when he actually started to breathe in.

Before long, he felt a weird, straining sensation against his back, from the inside, making him groan and curl his fingers up a bit. It was an incredibly weird sensation, and for a few moments, he feared he’d done something wrong, and was about to break! Fortunately, his worries were unfounded. With a great *CREAAAAK* of stretched skin, he felt the shape of his torso shifting, bloating out in all directions, now, rather than just forwards! He seemed to lose a little size like that, but it was simply a consequence of it rounding itself out better. He’d gone from obscenely pregnant-looking, to ‘merely’ looking like he’d swallowed some kind of oversized watermelon.

While it had been uncomfortable for a moment, the shift came with an enormous sense of relief and pleasure, his eyes rolling up into his head a bit… if not for that hose in his mouth, his tongue would’ve been hanging out of it right about now, drooling onto the floor. He’d seen people cum around this point before, in the videos he’d watched… he’d always wondered why. Now? Now he knew exactly why. Because it was the best.

It only seemed to egg him on to suck and gulp more and more, watching with glee as his belly swelled like an inflating beachball. Below his chest, his torso didn’t even look vaguely human anymore; it went straight from a normal pair of nipples, to a giant, obscene, wonderfully round bulge!

Bit by bit, that bulge started to cover his legs, squishing his cock against the floor, every gulp of fartgas grinding his dick against the carpet… before he even realized what he was doing, he started subtly shifting his hips back and forth, humping his own distended belly. It was the closest he could get to masturbation right now; with his belly this distended, his arms wouldn’t have a hope of reaching his dick!

Still, he kept on gulping.He felt a brief sense of protest in his navel, before the little ‘innie’ popped right out, gas pushing it out of its hidey-hole with another surge of pleasure! The whole time, his skin made constant creaky noises, while the gasses inside of him constantly seemed to shift and writhe inside of him.

His room was a cacophony of creaks, pleasured moans, and *Bllllrrrrprppppprrrppppp* sounds coming from his insides.. and he was loving every second of it! The feeling of being this stretched was just… it was beyond incredible. He never wanted it to end. It was true that using a fart hookah wasn’t ‘technically’ addictive… but now, he could see why most people who got their hands on one spent their entire free time turning themselves into the most ridiculous fartballoons that they could manage.

Unfortunately, fun as it was, he DID have other things he had to do today. With a small groan, he pulled the tube out of his mouth, dropping it down, and pressed his arms to the top of his belly; it was generally recommended to press down as close to the middle as you could, but with his ridiculous shape, his arms didn’t even reach halfway to his navel!

As he squeezed, he felt the gas bubble up inside of him… and once again, his throat bulged out, as if the fart gas was a solid mass escaping from him, before it erupted out of his mouth!

*BRRRRAAAAAAPFFFFRRRRRRTTTBRRRRAPPPPPP*

Somehow, the noise of its escape seemed torn between the sound of an enormous belch and a fart! The sheer force of its escape stretched his mouth open, almost to the point of making his jaw ache, a solid green mass of gas erupting out of his mouth.

Great as that gas had felt going in, the sudden, abrupt escape felt even MORE amazing… and it only got even better as his asshole gave a throb, and started to stretch open, another lewd *PTHHHHRRRBBBBBBBPPPPPTTTT* coming from it, it, too, letting a torrent of gas loose into the room.

It was way, way too good. He’d been close to orgasm for quite a while, now, and this was all just too much. With a blissful moan - that was, admittedly, somewhat hard to tell he was making thanks to his ridiculous oral fart - his dick started to erupt all over his belly and the floor, ropes of jizz splattering all over the place!

His enormous fart from both his mouth and asshole lasted a good five minutes, at least one of which felt like a nonstop orgasm, his dick shooting cum until he barely had any left. The only worrying thing was that, after all of that… he barely seemed to have shrunk. His room was completely flooded with green gas, to the point it was almost difficult to see anywhere, and he was still way too bloated to open a window, or a door… he was going to be stewing in his own fart gas, too ballooned to move, for hours at this rate! Just thinking about that made him grin, even as he reached down to start squeezing again...

[weirdlewdstories]

Commission - Hyper-Scat Soiling Shenanigans

So, quick preface! This is the first commission I actually managed to finish, on account of getting way out of my groove with writing for a while. Have a ton of health problems, and miiight be going in for surgery sometime in the not too distant future. I was struggling to break into any of the stuff I was supposed to be working on, because it all felt really big...

Theeen this idea came along, for a short story with two guys, some big-dom-small-sub hyper scat shenanigans. Helped me get back into the swing of things, so I should, hopefully, be doing more writing again. Unless my organs decide to fuck up in new and exciting ways, we shall see!

*Blooorppppppp*

By now, the sound of Adam’s belly gurgling away was getting truly ridiculous. It’d been weeks since Jake had let him use the bathroom, all part of a little dare the two of them had going on. Jake had to admit, he was enjoying the effects; his friend had never exactly been slim, but it looked like he’d put on more than a few pounds since this had started. Plus, watching his friend squirm and shift where he sat - the couch, of course, his huge hips ensured that a normal chair was quite out of the question - was the highlight of his day.

“C...Come on, Jake… it’s been long enough now, hasn’t it? I really don’t think I can hold it…”

Jake smirked at that, moving over to rub his friend’s belly… no-one would’ve ever guessed he was the one in charge, here. He was a lithe little thing, barely any fat on him, and a soft, pretty face framed with blonde hair. Adam, on the other hand, was all bulk. He was quite a bit taller, with over a pounds on the smaller guy, maybe even two hundred! Yet, it was Jake who pulled the strings. When he said to jump, Adam would… probably, at least. It hadn’t really been put to the test, for fear of earthquakes.

“Are you suuuure~? I bet another week or two would have you really rumbling. They’d be able to hear you next door…” he teased, climbing up onto Adam’s belly, groping it as it gave another great, gurgling groan!

“O-Oh god… I’m serious! I’m gonna go right now if you don’t let me!”

Jake made a great show of sighing, rolling his eyes. “Honestly. There I was, stripping for you and everything…” he said, gesturing to the pile of discarded clothes on the floor - Adam was still fully-dressed, wearing a large shirt, and jeans - “...And all you can think about is the bathroom? Some guys would take off-”

*FFRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTRBRRRRRRPPPPPP*

With that great, rumbling fart, Adam’s belly gave an enormous jiggle, dislodging the pervert straddling it, sending him tumbling to the ground! He was quick to get to his feet, and couldn’t hide the impish grin on his face...  “Fine, fine. Let’s get you to the toilet.”

Depsite sounding exasperated, Jake couldn’t get the grin off his face. He was almost more eager to see his friend in the bathroom than Adam was to get there… which really was saying something. Adam got up off the couch, body jiggling as he did, giving a low groan as he struggled to hold in another fart, waddling off towards the bathroom as fast as he could, followed by Jake at a more leisurely pace.

Once he got there, he found Adam facing towards the door, groaning and squirming, straining and fiddling with his pants. They were brand new jeans, that Jake had bought specially for today. Despite his earlier protests, he’d fully intended to let Adam use the bathroom today; whether or not he’d get to use the toilet was another matter entirely.

While simple to do up, the jeans were obscenely fiddly to get undone and removed, a fact that Adam was discovering at this very moment, the pressure in his bowels growing ever more urgent. It was almost like a dam had broken inside of him the moment he decided he was going to go NOW. Whatever it was that had helped him hold it in this long was gone; ready or not, he had to go!

“Fuckfuckfuckfuck it’s coming ouuuuuut!” he yelled, locking eyes with Jake for a moment, glaring at him… he couldn’t believe this. He was about to shit his pants like some kid, and it was ENTIRELY Jake’s fault… and yet, that flash of annoyance couldn’t last longer than a few seconds. The sensation of the enormous mass of scat within him  finally starting to move was just too incredible to think of anything else.

“Hhhhnnghhhhhh…” he groaned, biting his lip, shivering as he felt his asshole clench and squeeze… before finally giving up, a turd as thick as his wrist erupting out of the hole, stretching it wide! The sensation was incredible… just the feeling of relief and release alone would’ve been enough to be utterly amazing, but even without that, this would have felt incredible! He could feel his asshole straining as it was stretched… and ridiculous as the idea was, it was almost like he was being fucked in reverse! His eyes rolled up into his head, his fingers and toes all clenching and squeezing at nothing, while helpless gasps escaped his mouth… gasps that transitioned into a loud, helpless moan, as that shit just kept on pumping out!

There was a quick flash as Jake snapped a picture of his face - he never wanted to forget the ridiculous, perverted look on it! - but he barely even noticed. All he could think about was how amazing this felt, and how it only seemed to be getting BETTER!

The initial wrist-thick log had only been the beginning. It was getting thicker and thicker, the load becoming more intense, pumping out with more force… already, he could feel the fabric of his undies starting to give, and the back of his jeans straining and bulging with the stuff - to their credit, they were staying on remarkably well. None of the scat seemed to be escaping out of the top, it was all just staying trapped in with his ass, in an ever-growing bulge!

An ominous creak from his jeans tipped him off to the fact that it wouldn’t exactly be staying in there forever, though. Bit by bit, he was starting to recover from how overwhelmingly good he felt, his face returning to some semblance of normality, letting him finally notice the shit-eating grin plastered all over Jake’s face. “Y...You… think this is… funny, don’t you?” he grunted, straining, still shitting as he spoke, his cheeks starting to heat up a bit; now he was getting used to the pleasure, the embarrassing nature of the situation was starting to hit home.

“Nah. I think it’s hot, mostly,” Jake shot back.

“Well… let’s see how you… o-Oh GOD!”

Whatever Adam had been about to say, he never quite got to finish. With an inhuman gurgle from his stomach, he was forced to double over forwards, sticking his ass up into the air… and unleashing a ridiculous log of shit, thicker than both of his arms put together, stretching and distending his hole to the point he doubted it’d ever be the same again! Despite all of his protests and his embarrassment, it just felt too good to be true; with a long, shuddering moan, his cock pulsed and throbbed, before shooting rope after rope of thick, sticky jizz into his pants, even as the ridiculous mass of scat finally forced the tortured jeans to give way!

The logs tore an enormous hole in the back of his pants, forcing their way out with enough force to smash against the toilet, shattering the porcelain and just continuing to pump out en masse, flooding into the bathroom! His thoughts, which he’d had to struggle so hard to gather, scattered to the winds once more, any semblance of rational thought getting purged from his mind as he took the shit of his life.

He was dimly aware of his face getting buried into his boyfriend’s asshole at some point, and the lewd sounds and smells of farts soon started to fill his head, but it was hard to focus on anything other than how good his bowels and ass felt; he never wanted this to stop! The sensation of shitting was just too good...

Unfortunately, all good things do have to come to an end. It took almost half an hour for his bowels to empty, even at the ridiculous pace they’d been going, and the mess he’d made was nothing short of epic. His jeans and underwear were ruined; the entire rear had been torn off, destroyed by the ridiculous mass of scat. His boyfriend’s bathroom had suffered a similar fate; what wasn’t utterly destroyed was both buried in shit and flooded with it. Half of the room was pretty much floor-to-ceiling scat, in an enormous, thick pile!

“H...hahh… holy… that… was…”

“Fun, huh?” Jake asked, smirking, pulling his asshole away from his boyfriend’s nose, already buttoning up his own pants. “Let’s keep you holding it in a couple months longer next time, though, neh?”

[weirdlewdstories]

Do you draw?

Would if I could! Alas, my artistic talent is basically in the negatives. I don’t have fantastic control over my hands, so even my handwriting is basically complete garbage. My attempts at art could probably be classified as war crimes, and I gave up on trying after a while.

[weirdlewdstories]

Writing Commission Info

E: Currently struggling with real life bullshit. Might be a while before I start taking on more commissions, I’m struggling incredibly hard to motivate myself to do any at the best of times. Sorry. That said, if your idea is something immediately interesting and appealing to me, I’ll think about it! I’m just under more than enough stress as it is, and don’t need more piled on top.

So, seeing as there was some interest, I decided to take a stab at ~lewd story commissions!~ I could use some $$$, and who knows, maybe some extra inspiration will get me writing more. That’s not to say I won’t still write free stuff, too, ‘course.

Pricing is simple-ish!

First 1500 words (enough for a reasonable-ish short story) is $5

every 500 words after that is $2.50 extra.

Basically the same as it was before, except you get 500 words free, and it’s a bit more modular. Hurrah!

Payments via paypal when stuff’s done, if you want to contact me for one, send me an ask on here.

Ideally, after checking if there are any spots left/whatever, I’d like a list of all the things you would, specifically, like to see happen in the story. This can range from being as simple as “two femmy boys with giant wangs buttfucking each other”, to a list of bullet points of how exactly you want the story to play out, how you want characters to act, etc. Also a rough estimate of how long you want the story to be, preferably in X-thousand words. I might sometimes wind up writing a bit more than the allotted amount of words, I won’t (generally) charge extra for that, unless I start to realize that I’m over word-budget because I was set an impossible task to begin with.

Also, don’t be shy. I’m not gonna laugh at you for having weird kinks. I’m weird as fuck myself.

Stuff I’m more than happy to write about

Super weird, unrealistic kinks. Anything ‘out there’ that’s impossible in reality, or stuff being exaggerated to the nth degree. 

Happy to write about OCs, canon characters, and anything in between, though if I’m unfamiliar with a given canon, you might need to provide some input on how you want a character acting.

Equally happy to include characters of any sex/gender, doing the nasty with characters of any sex/gender. I’m a bit less experienced with girl-on-girl, as it’s not something I’m super interested in, but I’m willing to give it the old college try!

Stuff I’m iffy on writing, and might charge extra for

Anything that I won’t be able to put on tumblr, whether because of legal concerns or just ‘cause it’d get me banned might incur a bit of an extra fee.

Scratch that, I’ll probably just put it on pixiv or something.

Other stuff that makes a story hard to write might result in me asking a bit extra. Things like wanting a specific canon character I’m unfamiliar with to act perfectly in-character, etc; it’s difficult to pin down exactly.

I’m also a bit iffy on stuff involving real people, and generally not SUPER interested in writing entirely normal, down-to-earth realistic stuff; there are way better writers for that out there already!

Stuff I won’t write

Two things I’m absolutely not interested in writing off the top of my head: Realistic gore and torture involving real-life people, and extremely old characters. Realistic gore is the kinda thing I’m iffy on anyway, and having it involve actual people would make me distinctly uncomfortable. Also, I’d rather not think about geriatrics doing the deed, and writing about it would make my skin crawl, sorry if that’s your thing! (This doesn’t apply to ageless characters, like vampires and so on)

Also, I won’t write something that’s blatantly impossible within a given set of constraints; for example, if you give me a giant list of what you want to happen in your story, and want it all to happen in 1k words or less, I’ll probably say no.

Lastly, I reserve the right to decline an idea if I simply don’t think I could write a good story from it. I refuse to take people’s money if I don’t think I could make a satisfactory product with it.

Also, this is incredibly fucking wordy, sorry about that. I’m not exactly great at brevity, which is probably worth bearing in mind when you’re thinking about story length.

If anything’s unclear, fire an ask my way and I’ll answer it asap.