TOO FAST TO DIE !

𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒍𝒐𝒘?

[wheelmans]

COTY / 23 / HE/HIM. this is an independent baby from edgar wright’s baby driver. private, low activity, sideblog to @surviveds​. considering the sideblog status, this account is not labelled mutually exclusive, but is still selective regarding interactions. alt fc is used. do not try to interact with me if you write doc. slight canon divergence elements, which are detailed on my rules page; please give them a read before following.

[filmgifs]

Jordan Fisher as “Jake Taylor” in Work it (2020) 

[wheelmans]

an angel

[wheelmans]

belissimae​.

“  you did good today,  baby.  ”          she makes sure he can see her lips as she speaks.  her coffee is offered to him from across the table,  untouched.

he offers nothing for a long beat, gazing past angel towards doc, seemingly immersed in the typical post-job business---  but baby knows better. his brow arching behind his glasses, attention centering on her again, he says, low and with caution, apathetic, “i did my job,” hands retreating to pockets, dismissing the offer with a subtle shake of his head.

[wheelmans]

can edgar just remake the movie

[masonsgooding]

Jordan Fisher on Twitch 02/12/19

[wheelmans]

baby started T at 14, after meeting another trans man who was one of doc’s favorites for jobs, and who became a kind-of mentor to him, helping him understand terminology and how to define himself and what options there were for him to actually be himself. baby wasn’t entirely out, wasn’t sure of what being trans meant, but did know he was masculine and called himself a boy and doc did help baby on this front, enforcing he/him and chiding people who insinuated baby was “girly.” baby didn’t immediately tell joe, because he hadn’t fully explained to joe his feelings - he didn’t entirely trust him yet, because baby was still dealing with trauma, and didn’t know how to vocalize what he wanted to say, anyway - but there were some pretty obvious changes once he started hormones, and joe could notice anyway because he’s smart. joe didn’t say anything, though, because he wanted baby to feel comfortable in confiding with him, but as the months dragged on, joe decided he had to be a little proactive, and so he came out to baby to establish rapport.

even with this, it still took baby another couple months, but when he finally came out, joe agreed baby could continue acquiring hormones the way he was, and the rest they would figure out together.

[grimeclown]

Some of you will see the warning on q-tips saying “don’t insert into ear canal” and take it seriously like some kind of chump. They want your ears full up so you can’t hear the world around you. My shits so polished clean I can hear the constant shriek of the earth turning on its axis.

[grimeclown]

I have tinnitus

[wheelmans]

exhauest‌.

“  so do i.  ”  the money is just a bonus, most of the time. it’s what got them to start in the first place. not just because they were good at it, or because it would be stupid not to, given the car they owned back then, but because they’re happiest when behind the wheel of a car, pedal to the ground. 

logan’s eyes narrow, biting back a laugh.   “  yeah. said he had a thing for you.  ”  despite how monotonous it is, they’re sure the sarcasm is still obvious. it’s supposed to be. they allow the disgust they feel to curl their lip, because —   ace? really?   “  i’m pretty sure he has a girlfriend. unless he just likes the name dakota enough to tattoo it all over his body.  ”  a detail they wouldn’t have noticed had it not been for the fact they’d dated a dakota, too —   not the same, of course, because their dakota isn’t remotely interested in men, much less men like him.    “  and more importantly, he’s a piece of shit. i don’t know you, but i still know you could do better than —   that.  ”

HE SAYS NOTHING. there’s a denial scratching at his teeth but baby doesn’t allow it a breath of air, not sure of how convincing it’d be. he feels the heat in his face deepen, a blue-hot embarrassment, streaking his face in shades of purple-red. he wants to defend ace, defend himself, but there’s nothing he can really think to say -- which he supposes must be to their credit, but baby doesn’t want to consider that. ace’s kindness, however fleeting, however minimal, has scarred him in a way akin to doc’s cruelty; he feels it against his skin, too, not as sharply, urgent, but enough. 

there’s no words to describe that, and even if there were, baby doesn’t think they’d understand.

because it’s not what they think. there’s a feeling there, yes, but baby’s not stupid, and doesn’t find himself daydreaming, constructing a world where he and ace are together. it’s just a feeling, something small but alive and living in his chest and bites at his heart every now and again to make its presence known. he doesn’t want it, but he’s got it, and he’s dealing with it; it’s none of their business.

“he’s my friend--” and that’s true, right? “----an’ i know he ain’t a good person, but maybe i ain’t either.” bats’ blood on his hands, the look in the guy’s eyes as he choked out a final breath flashes in baby’s mind’s eye like a spark of lightening. “like y’said, you don’t know me.”

[filmouts]

Are you hungry?

Always.

[wheelmans]

exhauest‌.

they’re not interested in wasting their breath on ace emerson, of all people, so for a moment, they consider not answering at all, but it doesn’t last.  “  shit luck.  ”  logan shrugs.  “  actually—    it was his car. the demon. i wanted to see if i could outrace it in my challenger. and i did.  ”  considering everything, it’s not that much of a surprise, with logan’s car having a good two hundred extra horsepower and about five hundred pounds less.   “  he tried a couple more times. different cars. i think it bruised the hell out of his ego, so he mentioned you last time.  ”  that baby could beat them, as if that’s all they care about. it’s not—  they’ve lost plenty of races, and realistically, they’ll lose plenty more. it’s not all about the bragging rights or the money; sometimes, just the adrenaline is enough.

IT SOUNDS ENOUGH LIKE ACE, but racing--? baby hadn’t pegged him as the type. it’s a jarring reminder of how they’re just strangers, really, a flash of reality like a streak of lightning across his vision; it eats through that shaky excitement that’d been building, reflecting in his face, in the way his mouth sags like a house left to the elements, its roof weighed with snow. baby shifts his weight between his legs and grasps for confidence like he’s half-asleep and looking for a light in the dead of night. “i just drive for fun,” he says bluntly, and it feels like a lie, even though his obligation is buried in a shallow grave, or burned, or -- whatever buddy did with doc. 

and he doesn’t have the motivation -- or the car -- to make good on whatever promises ace may have on his behalf.

if he can even trust their word. baby offers them a look over the rim of their glasses, as if it’s that easy to perceive the truth. “he say anything else?” baby asks, hearing how hopeful it is and feeling a heat lick at his neck as a blush begins to spread.

[lunchtime79-blog]

this laundromat was the most beautiful place i have ever been. i have been 2 the sistine chapel

[wheelmans]

exhauest‌.

“  emerson.  ”  annoyance accompanies the name, unintentionally, though they’d bet that it isn’t much of a surprise; he has that effect on people, regardless of how nice his collection of cars is. they roll their shoulders back, gaze lowered, bored, as they pick at a scab on their hand, stopping only when it begins to bleed.   “  so is it true? you drive fast?  ”   

“EMERSON,” baby repeats, only vaguely questioning, but completely, extensively, wholly surprised ---- but beyond that shock, baby doesn’t know what to feel, what it means that ace talks about him... he pushes it down, buries it with the intent to unearth it later. for now, he offers a sort-of shrug; a cock of his head in reserved acknowledgment: yeah, i do. he’s proud of that, but leery, too; the wounds from doc are still tender. she doesn’t seem like the type... but so many sheep are merely wolves imitating the motions. “how do you know him?”

[mustprotectchopper]

🕶

[wheelmans]

i actually do want an au where baby ends up killing doc impulsively and then is on the run

[wheelmans]

yea i refer to buddy as baby’s dad frequently because baby sees him as a fatherly figure but don’t ever think i’m erasing joe because i’m absolutely not. joe will always be important to baby; baby will always be grateful for everything he’s done for him; baby will always see joe as his father, first and foremost, even above buddy -- but buddy and darling understand baby on a level that joe just can’t, and so he can’t help but view them both as parental figures. they all mean something to him, just in different ways. making the decision to leave joe behind when buddy suggests a “change of scenery” after doc’s death is a difficult one, but baby feels comfortable in doing so because he knows that joe will be okay; that he knows baby has always loved him; that joe has already given him everything, and that it’s time that baby truly discover who he is. joe had always encouraged baby towards self-discovery, but finding his place in the world -- being able to drive for the fun of it and not because of doc’s abuse and threats -- is something he needs. so he leaves joe, but it’s not permanently; baby will go back. 

[wheelmans]

@darlngs:  ❪ i can go. ❫

HE HAS TO REMIND HIMSELF THAT IT’S OKAY NOW: doc is gone and it’s okay. he doesn’t have to keep her --- or anyone else --- at arm’s length; he can breathe, truly breathe, but sometimes such fresh air is overwhelming to his stinted lungs, like an explosive burst of color after hours, days, weeks of darkness. it’s a learning curve, as if he’s re-familiarizing himself with a once-known language after years of disuse; baby can recognize the inflection and general meaning, but it’s still harsh at times, frustrating. baby rolls his knuckles against his knees before signing, ‘you don’t have to.’ he pulls up his knees flush to his chest. a sharp hum digs into his brain, not content to be quieted by his music tonight. he continues: ‘i didn’t know you knew sign.’