the baby is snuggled up under his blanket under the couch and keeps yelling “BE QUIET, I’M SLEEPING” every time the dogs bark
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the baby is snuggled up under his blanket under the couch and keeps yelling “BE QUIET, I’M SLEEPING” every time the dogs bark
I need a nap so bad but I also really want to read fanfic esp since I will be out later than usual with friends tonight what to dooooo
napped for three full hours I could fight god
I need a nap so bad but I also really want to read fanfic esp since I will be out later than usual with friends tonight what to dooooo
Being nefarious with mama
do NOT quote me on this but so far—second job work is going well and seems like it might not be as demanding as I was expecting. three kids and none of them are very confident writers but fortunately they have an extremely confident editor & project manager in me lol and I’m doing a better job than usual at quickly herding them towards their long essay topics. pray for me that I can hustle them through this at a reasonable clip (while also still helping them produce good writing!!)
I have two hands. I have machines. First, I walk on the balance beam. First, I walk on it. Clap, clap. I want to pull my hair. I first walk on a big beam. I play ball. Big, big beam.
the baby spotting a tiny stain on his carseat: IT IS BLOOD, MOMMY! I will check it with my light. [shines tiny flashlight on it for a long time] it is a blood. little bit blood. I’m brushing my teeth. I find a bee in there.
Yulia Sidneva
Ok, Have you in real life ever seen a bathroom that had its light switch Outside of the bathroom. Not like one of those fancy giant bathrooms where the toilet is in its own little room, but a normal sized bathroom where you could be in there doing your thing and someone Outside could just turn the light off on you?
This is so normal to me
Yeah but it's weird
Maybe? normal though.
Maybe? weird though.
No but I'm pro this being a thing
no and what the fuck why would that be a thing
Other
Button.
In Real life. not in a videogame or movie because I've Only seen it in videogames and a friend has spotted it in a movie.
having a toddler is such a wild ride lol they’re the chattiest, goofiest, snuggliest, most delightful little people on the planet. and also sometimes they take off their pants and climb up on the kitchen table midway through dinner in order to IMMEDIATELY pee all over it and then when you lunge towards them to try to get them OFF THE TABLE they fling their little bodies over the edge and somehow manage to wind up stuck upside down between the table and the kitchen bench shrieking at the top of their lungs. still no pants on. covered in pee.
photo with mom that survived a flood in mexico
omg im soooooo close to being done for the day i only have one 45 min meeting left!!!!! then i can go collect my hilarious little child and take him over to our friends' house so he can ride his new big boy bike!!
a major event took place today… we came home to find a jeep parked in our parking spot. my child spent five full minutes circling the jeep exclaiming “mommy, JEEP! BIG wheels! he driving! mommy, jeep??? it’s a BIG one! I touch jeep? have lights, mommy! he driving???”
amateurish first effort
image description: a photograph of a black shirt with white text in all caps on it that reads, "Rosencrantz is dead and Guildenstern is dead and me I also feel not so good". / end description
oh my god i am in SUCH a foul mood today and also aggressively do not want to go on this date tonight for one zillion reasons but the later i wait to cancel the ruder it gets so i think at this point i just have to go. i am in SUCHHHHH A MOOD
I don’t wanna go to work 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 but I’m so close to the easy part of the week