two more days.
summary: your time at uni has been a little less than fun, and chris is extremely worried about you.
what to expect: a lil angsty, kind of a continuation of not possible but can be a stand alone, fluff, established relationship, chrismd x reader.
a/n: hey i hate this but oh well life goes on, i need new people to write for plsplspls tell me what yall want so i have something to do summer is SO boring
chris missed you.
there was a hole in his heart in the shape of you that got more painful every day that your absence was felt.
but as far as chris was aware, you were thriving at university. you’d spoke on the phone about new friends you’d made, and how much you were enjoying your new life in london, which only made him miss you more.
however, your actual life in london was far from glamorous.
you’d been lost more times than you could count on two hands, the work load was immense and you felt like all of your friends had someone closer.
he noticed, because of course he did.
it started small; the state of your dorm in the background of video calls, the realisation that in the six months you’d been at university he’d never seen you eat anything other than pot noodles and drink anything other than monster energy or redbull.
he also noticed that you’d stopped going out as much. he tried so hard to just let you get on without going full stalker mode but he couldn’t help having a look on your new ‘friend’s’ instagrams to see what you were getting up to, he saw that they were all going out, but you weren’t there.
he told himself that this was a one time thing, maybe you were busy or maybe school had ran over?
but then your replies got shorter, and you stopped telling him a detailed analysis of your entire day like you used to, he was lucky if you even answered his questions most of the time.
they were always questions that you couldn’t answer honestly, such as;
“how’s school?”
“have you had a nice day?”
“are you okay?”
it felt horrible lying to him, but the thought of him sitting at home worrying about you was worse. so you buried all the pain and emotion that you were feeling and tried to put a brave face on; a brave face which chris saw right through, obviously.
he didn’t know what to do.
he didn’t want to be that controlling boyfriend who panicked every time you had a bad day, but it was getting too consistent to ignore.
his finger hovered over your contact, debating how this call was going to go, he would ask how it was going and you would either lie and tell him you were fine, or tell him the truth about how you're feeling. chris wasn't sure which one scared him more.
the phone rang three times before the line connected to your phone in london.
"hi!" you said. you were hoping to sound excited, or atleast not like you had been crying not even ten minutes ago.
the tension in chris's shoulders eased just slightly at your seemingly happy greeting.
but then he listened closer;
how bright it was.
how rehearsed you'd sounded.
he knew you were putting on a happy face for him and he hated it.
"hey, lovely. you okay?" he asked softly.
there was a pause.
"yeah, yeah im fine."
there it was again.
fine.
he just wished you didn't feel like you had to protect his feelings when you were obviously struggling to keep it up.
"you sure?"
you hesitated.
chris's heart sank because you never hesitated at that question. you always gave him a perfectly curated explanation on why you were absolutely fine.
"..course i am." you said, but it was quiet, way too quiet.
"please don't lie to me, love." he said.
the line went silent, eerily so.
"i wasn't trying to, i promise." you whispered. "i just really didn't want you worrying about me."
his chest ached.
"oh, babe-"
you cut him off.
"and you've already got so much going on in your own life, i didn't want you to feel like i was adding to any of that stress.." you said, your voice was bordering on a shaky sob.
chris closed his eyes.
"you know what ive actually been worried about while you've been away?" he asked softly.
a faint sniffle caught on the static of the phone call.
"what?"
"you." he whispered.
chris could almost feel the panic through the phone screen.
"not because you've done anything wrong," he said quickly. "because i can see that you're trying to protect me from how you're feeling."
he could hear you crying quietly, you genuinely didn't know what to say.
"sweetheart, i want to know when you're having a shit day, and i want to know when you're having an amazing day, alright?"
he could picture you, curled up in your bed, picking at your fingernails and sinking your teeth through your lips like you always used to, and wondering if you'd finally been 'too much'.
"i know.." you said.
"i don't think you do, love."
you sniffled.
"then i'll learn."
his heart stuttered, because you should be arguing with him, telling him to stop pushing you so hard. but instead you were quietly agreeing with him.
"you will, i know you will." he said.
he stared at the open tab on his laptop; a plane ticket to london purchased just over an hour ago.
"keep this weekend free, sweetheart."
you frowned,
"what? why?" you were trying not to get your hopes up, you'd learned that it had never exactly gotten you very far.
"because im coming to see you." chris said.
he heard your breath catch;
"you're kidding.." you whispered.
he huffed a small laugh.
"absolutely not, booked the flights about an hour ago."
chris then heard your tears start again, and god was his heart about to break into two at the sound.
"hey, hey lovely it's okay." he said softly.
"i just really miss you." you choked out.
"i know, babe, i miss you too. more than you know."
he could hear a stifled sob before you opened your mouth again, however this time you were a lot quieter;
"im so tired, chris."
chris's heart clenched painfully, because jesus christ, you were exhausted.
and it wasn't the kind of tired that could be fixed with a long nap.
this was the kind of tired that settled in your bones.
"i know, love. two more days, yeah?"
you nodded even though he couldn't see you, because your brain finally had a reason to tell you that it was going to be okay.
"two more days." you sniffled.
"then im stealing you for the weekend." he said, hoping to lighten the mood.
his statement earned the tiniest laugh from you.
"please do."
he smiled.
"and im binning every monster can that's in your fridge-"
"chris-"
"no, listen." he said, "im gonna take you out for some proper food, not pot noodles or reheated tesco pasta."
god, even the thought of restaurant food had your mouth watering.
"that sounds amazing." you whispered.
"yeah it does, doesn't it?"
you talked for what felt like hours, until your words became slurred and your replies got shorter, but he did love it when you were sleepy.
"get some sleep, love." he said, and judging by the fact he didn't get a coherent response, he presumed you were already half gone.
"i'll ring you tomorrow, okay? i love you so much."
"love you more." you murmured sleepily.
and then he reluctantly pressed the 'end call' button. he stared at his still open laptop screen, two more days and he'd be on your doorstep, two more days and he'd be able to hold you.
and suddenly going to london to see you didn't feel as impossible as it did this time yesterday.
and maybe it was going to be okay.
