They say there is always a reason,
Where is that „God“ you call,
When my mum cries every night till‘ the dawn?
Afraid to come back and never find her home.
I started loosing sleep, going insane -
Trying to protect her till it‘s time to go to school again.
And yet it reapeats over and over every day.
And then I start to wonder,
Another night I dreamt of killing her myself,
But my sick fantasies swam away
When he took a knife and put it near her waist.
My heart fucking dropped.
A smell of pure alcohol scent.
I pushed him away from her and screamed loud -
Knew he couldn‘t to it to his own child.
He put blades to my thoat too..
I remember trying to grab his hand
But it slipped down and cut though my arm.
Then he took my hand and threw me on the kitchen floor,
His face was cold and eyes were dead -
Error. No emotion to be found.
Later looked around to what he had done
And started apologizing for what he could‘t undone.
Promised it will never happen one more time,
He is treatening my mother once again.
Waiting untill she falls asleep tonight,
Counting days on my fingers untill I die...
Waking up early to sleep all day.
Everybody askin‘ me whats wrong? but baby, you don’t understand.
You say it‘s not a big deal.
There is always a reason.
Doesn‘t make me feel better at all.
Only thing i can do is put my earbuds in
And listen to neighbourhood.
„How can you feel the way that im feeling
If you‘re not inside my head...?“
turnnoffyourmind
origamiaround
gummygunk
izzy806
ellievsbear
andulkaphoto
