MOVED TO RELIGIONWORE.

"the wasted years, the wasted youth, the pretty lies ; the ugly truth." indie mary christiansen from ddadds. written by artie.

[religionwore-blog]

                             i pray that you can make it better down here. 

[religionwore-blog]

whhhhaaaat’s up,   GAMERS,   it’s ya boy, artie, bein’ an indecisive piece of garbage again.   ANYWAYS,   rebloggin’ to let you guys know that all of my   MARY CHRISTIANSEN   from   DDADDS   shenanigans are going to be happening over here. love you all. sorry for the inconvenience.     this blog is highly selective, mutuals only, low activity, nsfw, etc. please check my /rules & /mary for more information !

[whorcwifc-blog]

@religionwore is where i am now ! i’m trying to do this and be positive and stuff and rp a muse i actually really love !

[religionwore-blog]

                             i pray that you can make it better down here. 

[religionwore-blog]

                             i pray that you can make it better down here. 

[whorcwifc-blog]

@religionwore is where i am now ! i’m trying to do this and be positive and stuff and rp a muse i actually really love !

[religionwore-blog]

whhhhaaaat’s up,   GAMERS,   it’s ya boy, artie, bein’ an indecisive piece of garbage again.   ANYWAYS,   rebloggin’ to let you guys know that all of my   MARY CHRISTIANSEN   from   DDADDS   shenanigans are going to be happening over here. love you all. sorry for the inconvenience.     this blog is highly selective, mutuals only, low activity, nsfw, etc. please check my /rules & /mary for more information !

[whorcwifc-blog]

also if anyone does want to rp like off tumblr i’m down. i just wanna write rn i guess. love you guys.

[whorcwifc-blog]

update???

so hi this is going to be a long and gruelling post about. everything? i guess.

tl;dr: im depressed and dropping out of college, i may make an art blog or remake this blog for real or another to blog.

so i’m horribly depressed. i hate college. i’m dropping out and i had to think long and hard about this decision i’m making. and i feel so shitty. and awful about dropping out. but i know that it’s better for me. and if i don’t, then i’m only going to get worse. and when i did something like that before, it landed me in a really terrible position where i did some things that i am not proud of.

i know i said i’m gonna remake. then i made a ryuk/death note multi muse. then deleted it. then i have a blog that i started setting up but haven’t done shit with because i’m just. i have no motivation.

i love art and i love to make art in writing or drawing or singing or whatever. but while i’ve been here, i’ve been nothing but depressed and upset and i have no will to create art. i’m not creating out of passion or desire or need to creat. i’m creating out of necessity. i’m creating because i have to. and i hate it. i hate my art. and so i’ve been just. upset. i haven’t been talking to anyone but my boyfriend and my mom. i’ve barely talked to my sister or my brother or my dad. i’m going home for a weekend in november and i know i’m only going to be even more miserable until christmas break.

i don’t know. and i love mary. i wanna keep writing for mary. but i also want to explore new muses and do something with the new it movie. i wanna write so much but i can’t keep up with multiple blogs and i don’t really like multimuse. so i’m at a cross roads. i know i’m going to be starting at a new school probably in march or smthn. i don’t know what’s happening in my life after i drop out and it’s scary to me.

and i hate myself so much. like this makes me feel so fucking awful. and like i’m a failure. i just. i’ve been having to come to terms with myself. i know i’m not a failure; i know that this is a choice that i made and i don’t like it and i know i’m not gonna be happy here so i’m going back to my home and with my family for a bit. this has been a lot of mental strain and i just. can’t handle it yet. i can handle living on my own and functioning in the adult world but this school is awful and not the right fit for me. i can’t handle living far away from my cat. i can’t handle living so far away from my mom. i’m not close enough to go see my boyfriend. i just feel isolated in a world where i can’t find any happiness and it sucks. and i hate it. and i’ve already considered doing something stupid.

i don’t know what i’m doing with my life. i just feel so lost and scared and upset. i want more friends. i have no one who i talk to regularly to help me with this. i have my boyfriend, yeah, and he’s like my best friend but i also want a group of people with more interests like me. i’m just scared and lost. i may open up an art tumblr when i move home??? and maybe i’ll get some groups and friends through that??? i don’t know.

im just scared and in a bad place. i don’t know what i’m going to do. i just feel so alone and depressed and shitty. i feel like a failure. i feel like an idiot. i feel so goddamn awful. i’m also really just. hung up on writing. nsfw content rn. in both sexual nature and violent nature. which is bad. i dunno. i have a lot of feelings rn.

[cinequeer]

Angelina Jolie photographed by Michel Bourquard, 1994

[whorcwifc-blog]

me: sees a brian blog sn considers revamping bc i love him and this blog looks fucking Bomb

[whorcwifc-blog]

@dollsdecay WORM!!

[whorcwifc-blog]

hmmmmMMM,,..,,..

[whorcwifc-blog]

ok... i’m narrowing it down to ... remaking mary, light yagami, mercy, or making an oc blog for either salem, or a character based off of an unsolved case named luebella ...

[whorcwifc-blog]

OK HI. IM REMAKING* RN. IDK WHAT THE URL WILL BE. WILL KEEP YOU UPDATED.

[whorcwifc-blog]

ok im here on my laptop finally but i gotta do projects iM SORRY

[whorcwifc-blog]

also this will probably still be like. a minor blog when i remake it. i'm vvvv tempted to make an oc blog which will be my main but hey