Hey :)

Trying to get back to 115

[whosthiskid24]

One of my Bible studies was on the book of Ester. In this story the main characters fast before an important decision.

They fast for three days.

Let’s celebrate Purim :)

[whosthiskid24]

Once upon a time I lost 30 pounds due to my eating disorder

Then I gained 15 to “recover”

And I’m not happier

[whosthiskid24]

Charging up my Fitbit

Yep. It’s starting again.

[whosthiskid24]

Everyone else: pistachios aren't a lunch

Me: pistachios are only 80 calories let me live

[whosthiskid24]

My measurements say XS but my eyes say XL

[tearsnhiddenbonez]

Every damn time

Me: *recovers for 3 weeks, eating balanced meals and trying to maintain weight*

Me: *gains 4 kg*

Ed: Hi I’ve noticed your sudden absence and I’m here to tell you, you’re a piggy ‘oink oink!’

Me: *slowly relapses*

[whosthiskid24]

...it me 100%

[whosthiskid24]

Curse

The best and worst things about having an overweight parent

Pros:

- diet pills lying around

- excersize equipment at home

- supplements helping with weight loss

- a scale

Cons:

- the gene that makes you fat

[whosthiskid24]

Ana Vitamin and Mineral Supplement Masterpost!!!

Not eating can obviously lower levels of certain vitamins and crap we all need so if you wanna stay as healthy as you can or stop your hair from falling out.. you might wanna read this.

Magnesium:

Lots of people don't eat enough magnesium, but anorexics are at a higher risk. Not getting enough can cause...

- worse PMS symptoms

- mood swings

- kidney and liver damage

- nutrient deficiencies (K, B1, calcium, potassium)

- insomnia

- depressed immune system :(

- osteroporosis (Anorexics are at a very high risk for this; and it's so so important you avoid it. Even after you recover you will have brittle bones.)

- SO MUCH MORE!! Take your magnesium supplements biches!!

Calcium:

- Again, take calcium supplements to avoid bad bone shit going down. It's no secret calcium helps your bones get all strong :)

- protects against cancer, diabetes, high blood pressure

- your heart, muscles, and nerves NEED IT to function properly. A big scary thing with anorexia is your heart health!! Take some calcium!! Yeet!!

Omega-3:

- lessens chances of sudden cardiac death

- reduces likelihood of heart attack or stroke

- reduces the chance of abnormal heart rhythm

- YASSS HONEY GOTTA GET THAT HEART HEALTHY STUFF HELL YEAH!!

Fiber:

- helps you not be constipated.. if you have a problem with that. I guess.

- lowers "bad" cholesterol levels

- helps with poo!! All around good time :)

Collagen:

- IMPROVES HEALTH OF SKIN AND HAIR!!! Anorexics are seriously lacking collagen!! That's why we tend to age faster and get nasty wrinkles :(

- reduces cellulite and stretch marks! What a bonus!!!

- reduces joint pains and degeneration

- boosts metabolism, muscle mass, and energy output. Hell yeah! We anorexics need as much muscle as possible!

- strengthens teeth and nails

- HELPS YOUR HAIR TO NOT FALL OUT!!! CAN I GET A HECK YEAH!

- you can get this in a powdered form, it comes with a lot of protein!! :D

Iron:

I learned a lot about this after giving blood, which I recommend B-) not getting enough can cause...

- breathing difficulties

- dizziness

- not good immune system :(

- dry or falling-out hair

- pale skin, fatigue

As always, recovery is the best option so you aren't just poppin pills all the time to live. That's no good. But I understand as well as anyone sometimes we don't want to recover just yet and sometimes just getting into a mind set where we learn to take care of our bodies just a little more can be very very tough.

Learning about nutrient deficiencies from anorexia and getting supplements to help fight that can be a first step in nourishing your body instead of hitting it repeatedly with a fucking stick and only feeding it chemicals and then binging later.

Some of these pills do have calories but it's nothing to be afraid of- it's usually low and the benefits outweigh the scary numbers. You can always burn them off with a quick jog or somethin I dunno do what you want.

( I'm not a scientist or dietician I'm literally 16 and starving myself what do you want. I did some google research. Fight me m8. Talk to your doctor! )

STAY SAFE, BABES!! I WANT THE BEST FOR ALL OF YOU AND IM HERE FOR YOU!!!

[whosthiskid24]

Yeah sure eating can be aesthetic but not eating can also be aesthetic. Just shift your preference.

[whosthiskid24]

It's becoming less "I want to be skinny so I'm pretty," because parts of me will never be pretty due to my disgusting bone structure, and I've reluctantly accepted that.

I now want to be skinny so people will care about me

I want to be skinny because it's a challenge and I am up for a good challenge

I want to be skinny so it looks like I have an eating disorder

I want to be skinny so I'll be more comfortable

I will always hate myself. I've just found new reasons to starve besides vanity

[whosthiskid24]

Things that used to make me excited: Birthdays, donuts, pizza, meat, special school lunches, fries

Things that now make me excited: ordering a fitness band off of Amazon and exclusively consuming powdered lemonade

[whosthiskid24]

I am above food

[whosthiskid24]

My art teacher: pop tart for the morning! :D

Me, absolutely repulsed: What the ffFUCCC

[whosthiskid24]

[ ] CONTROL

Felt like some photography today, doubles as a wrist check 5.5 in / 14 cm 🥀

[whosthiskid24]

I feel fat today

Maybe it's 'cause I am

[kombuchaandcoffee-deactivated20]

Me at the beginning of my ED - “I dont even have an eating disorder.

Me a month in - "Okay, but I’ll recover after i reach my goal weight!”

Me 4 months in - “I"ll probably recover after i reach my new goal weight…”

Me now - “I don’t want to recover.”

[whosthiskid24]

Fasting

Mints: <5 cal

Powdered drink mix: 5 cal

Sugar free Jello: 5 cal per serving, 20 cal per package

Various sparkling waters: 0 cal

Water: 0 cal :)

When I really want to put something in my mouth I'll make some Jello, take a mint, or chew on some ice. If I want something sweet to drink I'll bust open those powdered drink mixes, the lemonade ones are soooo good. If I'm really hungry a good carbonated 0 cal drink usually suppresses any hunger. Other than that I'm good to go :)