My life as a blonde

[whyaremybootscrying]

they weren’t lying when they said I had it easy, my life my be a shit show but I got that bread head and left

[whyaremybootscrying]

if you didn’t watch frosty the snowman as a child, you must be a communist. I don’t make the rules.

[whyaremybootscrying]

I just found out you can get high from a joint, joint what? custody?

[whyaremybootscrying]

when it’s 3am and i’m doing my skincare routine I sometimes have to sing the liv and maddie theme song to distract myself from the pure terror that is the alligator in my bath tub

[whyaremybootscrying]

ring ring it’s me please pick up the phone I want gormet cheese

[whyaremybootscrying]

My culture is me having me mental problems and not freaking out and being like it’s a me thing :) but absolutely fucking sobbing when I drop a cracker on the floor

[whyaremybootscrying]

god I love fire so much it’s just makes my brain go

ooo fire >:)

[whyaremybootscrying]

I ate a blueberry that tasted SO MUCH like grape kool-aid that I instantly started zoning out for 15min with flashbacks of my childhood

[whyaremybootscrying]

hypothetically I am asleep

[whyaremybootscrying]

okok hear me, scary birds as prisons. owlcatraz.

[whyaremybootscrying]

if I were the boogeyman i’d be so sad because no one ever sacrifices their limbs for me anymore, everyone always sleeps with no limb off the bed :(

[whyaremybootscrying]

don’t call me femdom call me chef

[whyaremybootscrying]

I pollinated ur mom

[whyaremybootscrying]

I always feel bad for the end slices of bread. I would rather eat the middle slices, but I just feel bad. The butt breads get no love :(

[whyaremybootscrying]

I downloaded a math game for 4 year olds so I could beat all the levels and feel smart for the first time.

[whyaremybootscrying]

Girls call themselves rats like sis, Remy does not match your energy. You wish.

[whyaremybootscrying]

stwabrerry