When I was young, the idea of "running away" seems so simple. I'd back up my bag with some candy, my teddy bear, and perhaps a change of clothes and you start walking. I'd get to the end of the block and normally turn around. Mostly because the place I was headed was only up the street to my friends house.
Now that I am grown up, the idea is so very different. As an adult you can't just "pack up everything and run away." In todays modern age, you can never truly remove yourself from ones past or responsibilities or commitments. Somehow, they will come and find you.
I want to run away. I wish I could just toss my stuff in a bag and never look back. I can't.
I can't escape my growing student debt. I can't escape my just pure lack of motivation to finish school, much less even pick a major (lets not even get started about my grades). I can't escape my depression, anxiety, intimacy issues, and anything else that may afflict me from time to time.
Why not?
Why can't there be a reset button?
I also have to face the realization that escaping these things won't fix them, nor will it end them. It will just put them off for another day where they can come back with greater force. Which will just make me want to run away even faster.....
There is more to this "rant", as I am calling it, but the internet isn't really a place to vent. For me at least.
...and if you read this. Well, I'm sorry...
