the past leaders to the present
“You’re not supposed to see that,” an eighteen year old William said with a sigh. He stood at the doorway of his bedroom with his younger sister on his back. He was currently facing his mother who looked paler than usual. His mother whom had just found the multiple college brochures he had tucked under his pillow when he heard footsteps approaching. He mentally cursed himself for forgetting to put them away in his books or his backpack at least. Somewhere that wasn’t too obvious. Especially when he was well aware of his mother having a knack to tidy up his room whenever she passed by.
Shit. He should have hidden them better. He felt as if an argument approaching would be too much of an understatement. His mom and stepdad has assumed he was planning on attending the local community college with all his friends. But that was the last place that William had wanted to go. Ever since he took a school trip to New York for a weekend with his class in the 9th grade, he had eyes set for that beautiful city. The city full of people, culture and lights. He had fell in love. It was absolutely different from where he was brought up. It was why he adored it so much. Stealing a glance from the local New York newspapers, he had felt how much the city needed more people standing up to bullies. And if that included ensuring that people would follow the law then so be it.
He adored the city never slept. How the city buzzed with life. How there was always something new to learn around each other. One mention of this new profound dream to his “friends” at the time and he was ridiculed. He gushed to his mom about New York and it all it had to offer on the car ride back home. Ever since he saw the way her eyes were distant, small talk filled the rest of the car ride home. He didn’t know what to make of that. Just that whatever was going on in that head of her wonderful mother’s, he didn’t want to continue poking and prodding. Later, William found out that her mother had lost her job when she was quietly crying into his stepdad’s shoulder. He wasn’t as loquacious about his die-hard love for the city after that. He got new friends, smarter friends and stayed quiet about what he wanted to do after high school.
What originally meant to be a small infutation blossomed out into an idea of its own. Just as he had been sure of getting a career in law enforcement, he had been sure about creating a live in New York City - he knew it was all in his path and he was not going to shake it any time soon. The quiet secret had delayed its reveal for far too long. Which is why William suspected that this was payback for not telling his mother sooner or really being the one to tell her at all.
“You want to attend college out of state?” Her mother asked with tears already welling in her eyes, lips quivering. He pressed a kiss against Emery’s head and set her down, “Go help dad with the barbecue, princess.” He only referred to his step father as dad when Emery was present, otherwise it was “Hey Nick.” She had burst into tears when he tried to explain the whole ‘step’ siblings situation to her, thinking that William could no longer be around. So he’d just called him dad to make things less confusing for the little brat. He was happy for his mother when she had met someone and fell in love. He was happy for his mother when she re-married and they moved into their house. He was always happy as long as she was happy. Plus, it meant he wasn’t an only child anymore. He watched his six year old step-sister skip down the stairs with caution then faced his mother. It made his stomach flip just seeing his mother look so… worn out. Her sullen eyes, her messy hair, her quivering lip, he felt useless.
Was this the type of stress he inflicted on his mom?
Liam found himself crossing his arms and leaning against the doorframe. He just stared on, not being able to find the words to explain himself. He pursed his lips then opened his mouth to break the silence but his mother beat him to it. “Tell the truth, Will,” and that shut him right up.Well, quiet any quick of idea of lies but he had decided against it.
“I don’t want to go to a community college, mom. I know it offers a lot of benefits and it isn’t as bad as people say it is but I’ve been working really hard to get the grades for a four year university and my counselor says I have a pretty good chance of getting some scholarships and into these one school I really like. It’s in New York City and it’s a really great campus where I’ll be offered financial aid and dorm housing. And I know you didn’t like the idea of me going into law enforcement but I’ll be able to take early courses for the police academy starting this semester online. I can find a job easily there so you don’t have to pay for anything. And it’s not such a long drive, just about six hours so whenever you need me to babysit Em, I can just come over. I’m sorry, please don’t cry! It was stupid I won’t leave Virginia then I can just look for Universities here-”
“Honey! Stop! Just.. breathe.”
Just like that, the mood had shifted. He didn’t even notice when it happened but his mother had his arms wrapped around his shoulders, pulling him into a hug. Liam had a habit of getting himself choked up whenever he got excited about something. He dropped his tense shoulders and let himself be pulled back to reality with soft coos and a reassuring hand.
“William, look at me.” He complied, leaning back to face her directly. She looked content and off, with a grin at her lips but her eyes filled with tears.
“I’m not upset.. Sure, I wished you would have at least talked to me about this, I could have helped you. But what’s done is done and besides, I forgot how my son is always in his own little world. I’m your mother and I’m supposed to be here for you. Now that being said, I’m just a little sad that my baby is growing up but I’m a lot more proud, okay? You’re going to this University. From now on and forward, you put yourself first. Us second. We’re fine, we’ll be fine. Stop apologizing for wanting this, for earning this. I am not going to get in the way of your success.”
That little moment between his mother and him changed his life. It felt as if a weight was lifted off his shoulders. He had his mother’s approval and that’s all he needed to pursue his dream. If he was asked, he would recall that day the best day of his life. Nick had grilled some hotdogs and burgers for dinner. Emery had washed the lettuce and had sat right next to her big brother. His mother smiled a little wider and they enjoyed their dinner outside in the back patio to enjoy the last days of Summer. The night had ended with a last minute store run for cheesecake in celebration and Emery sitting them all down to watch Finding Nemo with her. It was nice and it felt right and he was happy.
New York was going to be his home, like he’d planned, and his family was on board with it.
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