When Roderich felt himself shifted into a different position, he wrapped his arms around Ludwigâs neck and buried his flushed features into the otherâs shoulder. He could feel himself pressed against the other, and though they have been close before, he had never clung to Ludwig like he did now. As he felt himself lifted, his hold around Ludwig tightened and though he protested against being carried before he couldnât bring himself to voice anything now. Instead his mind was occupied by the warmth which surrounded him. Ludwigâs body was warm against his cold cheek while the jacket around his shoulders proved to be an ample shield against the rain. The only hint given to him that they were indeed outside was the pattering sound of the rain as it pelted them both.Â
He buried his face closer towards the manâs neck, feeling Ludwigâs rushing pulse against his nose. âIs he worried?â Roderich bit the inside of his cheek at the thought while his chest constricted with guilt. He didnât mean to make Ludwig worry; he didnât mean for Ludwig to have to carry him because he was too scared to stand, and he didnât mean for Ludwig to go rushing out into the rain with nothing for protection.Â
By the time they reached their dorm, Roderich could feel that the German was soaked to the bone, and shivering cold. It was all his fault. He was back in his nest of blankets because Ludwig had carried him there. He had protected him from the rain, and even stayed with him during the worst of the storm. Now the thunder was nothing but a fading grumble, as if the monster knew he had missed his chances on snatching Roderich this time. He was safe, and yet Ludwig was...
Roderich looked at him, expression scared, but not for the thunder, but because...
He swallowed thickly, trying to shake such thoughts away as he gave a small nod in reply that he was fine. Ludwig should go change. He was cold and wet, and if he caught a cold, Roderich would undoubtedly blame himself. Even as he watched the other change from across the way, Roderich was riddled with guilt; guilt from the past, the present, and possibly the future.Â
âYou shouldnât be with me... if I donât burn you, you will burn because of me.â Roderich tried to tear his eyes away from Ludwig, but he couldnât. No matter how hard he tried, or how much he wanted to turn away, he couldnât. He knew if he did look away now, heâd never bring himself to look at Ludwig again. He would lose him... for good.Â
Before he knew it, he had closed the distance between them. His forehead pressed against the Germanâs shoulder blade before his arms came to encircle around the otherâs waist to hug him from behind.
âEs tut mir leid...â âIâm sorry for being selfish... but I canât lose you.âÂ
