When I'm too socially exhausted to answer the first 10 dms, or I'm asleep, or offline, or Do-Not-Disturb, or visibly busy playing a game or streaming art-- Or for example any singular person has sent 10 dms in sequence without yet getting a response-- and then seeing "So-and-so is typing..."
Its one of those times I have to wonder if I'm giving off the wrong vibes because it doesn't feel like a healthy social relation at all- especially not on my end wherein I feel like an emotional babysitter who's some sort of attention and head pats dispenser.
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Okay I lied, this is very much so my least favorite phenomena in my life currently. (or at least a close second with 'people who don't warn you they're drunk / on drugs before hanging out')
For my business, for how I was raised, kindness is an automatic response. In that same way a waiter's job is to be friendly and kind no matter how annoying, poor-mannered, and messy a table is- I feel like there's an amount of annoying I have to put up with in the position as a public figure(?) of sorts, or at least as someone with an audience.
Its almost as though each person who sends volleys of messages like this assume they're not only being completely healthy about the interaction but must also be the only one doing it
If I do end up taking personal time the guilt trips begin as though only my direct personalized approval drives them to create, and without it they have a blame figure as to why they'll never draw again. The classic being this exact phrase with this exact wording "Long time; no talk." followed very specifically by more pointed interrogation as to my whereabouts and failures to respond in timely fashion.
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That's the part that really gets me I guess.
It happens and there are only two real options which are 1) Put up with it and deliver an apology to each person treating me like a 24/7 on-call motivational speaker more or less daily-- or 2) Remove them one after another each time it happens and give up on my 'any artist is worth investing in'
The real hard part, I suppose, is desperately wanting to pursue that 'any artist is worth investing in' teaching mindset, but without respect for boundaries and privacy and even just having a day off its just not possible.
I think at some point maybe I had a big conclusion in mind for this but it really comes down to "respect artists' boundaries.
Yes I may make dumb things, or cool things, or good or bad, I cannot be the reason that someone else creates though.
Its too much pressure and responsibility when I have to be my own inspiration first. Or at least, if I spend all my time taking care of others, I have no time to care for myself or the creative things I do.
shit is beefy, right
currently live in 1.25Gb/down home, clicking install on any game without throttling it DDoS's the house and overloads my computers disk-write capability, lol
I got "Agent Smith" (virus) sunglasses because I love their polygonal 7 sided shape
and theyre polarized which is GREAT
But my computer screens are *also* polarized, two identical dell monitors-- but one is polarized vertically and the other horizontally lmao
So I can see one screen at a time based on how much I tilt my head and Ive been doing this for hours lol
jacobvanloon
areudirty
baratheonpilled