My Life in Short Stories

Professional, meet personal Personal, meet professional Both of you try to get along, please.

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I had a year to try to put what this show's meant to me into words and I still didn't quite manage. 

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There’s more than one way to fall for someone.

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Denial is the only drug that could ever make Lena Luthor a dumbash

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How to Level Up Your Writing

I’m the Writer. We all have our roles in our friend and family circles. Some know how to fix cars, someone’s the person you come to about your weird mole, and some bake the best cupcakes. I’m the Writer. I’m the one who gets asked for help with the college app, the term paper, the email, the cover letter, the obituary, etc.

The fact is; I can’t teach you nine (or more) years of study and practice in a phone call. Nor do you probably want to learn all of that. But I also usually don’t have the time to line edit (or rewrite) the entire piece, and there are a handful of things that can make a huge difference, especially for beginners.

- Plan before you write. Writing is a lot like painting (maybe that’s why I love both). You don’t start with shading, you have to sketch the figure first. Similarly, if you start writing your Great American Novel on page one, you never know where you’ll end up. It’s a great tool for brainstorming, but can kill your momentum as you quickly run out of steam. Instead, outline the points you want to make, or the stories you want to tell. If it’s a long-form piece, consider reading a few books on structure; some people spend their entire careers experimenting with structure.

- Voice, voice, voice. This one of the most important parts of writing. Your primary goal as a writer should be clarity, and your secondary goal engaging the reader. Both of those are aided if you use a clear voice. It can take years to fully develop a voice, but there are things you can do to help. Start by writing sentences that sound like things you’d say. Never use words you wouldn’t say in real life; too many ‘big words’ and you sound pretentious or insecure. Vary your sentence structure to keep it from sounding monotonous, and make sure you don’t overuse words (or types of words). Most of your nouns shouldn’t have adjectives in front of them, and your verbs don’t all need adverbs. Flowery sentences (especially if you aren’t usually a flowery person) are unnecessary, and too many of them will obscure your point. To that end…

- Read it aloud. To yourself, or, if you aren’t a native speaker of the language you’re writing in, so someone who is. If it sounds uncomfortable in your mouth, it probably comes across as stilted or convoluted. Just rewrite it.

- Edit! And not just small edits. Move paragraphs, rewrite sentences or even chapters, and throw whole chunks out. Depending on the project (specifically its importance and the deadline), you might consider even printing it out and rewriting the entire thing. Many novels go through seven or eight rewrites before publication.

- Kill your darlings. More specifically; cut cut cut. If it is not serving your main thesis (the one you planned before you started writing), or adding to the voice, then you don’t need it. You can put it in separate file to come back to use later. (Mine is called a ‘dump sheet’).

- Use proper grammar. I don’t care if you’re starting your sentences with conjunctions, or if every sentence is a complete sentence, but a certain amount of grammar is important to keep your piece readable. Most of your sentences should be complete, and your pronouns should be clear. Similarly, the comma cannot do the job of all punctuation marks. Nor can ellipses, (you know who you are).

Now, go forth and write!

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Just some thoughts as we head back into lockdown

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“Keep diving.”

- Cat Grant, Supergirl

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Figure Your Life Out

Two years ago, right now, it became obvious that I wasn’t going to be employed much longer. I’d gone straight into my post-grad job from the internship at the same company I’d had for two years prior. Before that, I’d gone straight into that internship from another internship where I’d worked with many of the same people. I’d gone into those internships while in college because of another internship. I’d gone to college right out of high school because of course I was going to college right out of high school. All of the sudden, for the first time in my life, the next step wasn’t obvious. My road had come to not a dead end or a fork but a cliff and all that was left was to leap and see if I could fly.

Not only was I not going to have a job, but I’d learned a lot of very important lessons, among them the fact that that industry wasn’t what I wanted to do with my life. It’s not a useless lesson: sometimes the easiest way to find what you want to do is to learn out what you don’t want to do. So, on the first week of July that year, fresh out of Miss California, I stayed up until 3 am* and set out to make a plan. It isn’t a perfect system, and it’s nothing unique, but it worked for me and it worked for the friends I’ve shared it with, so maybe it’ll work for you.

Step 1: Cry I started the night out with a good long cry, some dramatic mournful stares at the window, and then a few angsty episodes of Supergirl to cheer me up. Whatever you’re feeling, let it out. Cry through the stress of trying to decide what you’re doing next. Mourn the good parts of the life you’re leaving behind, no matter how much it might be for the best. Get it all out now, so you can focus on the next steps.

Step 2: Make an “I’m happiest when…” List Sit down with a sheet of paper or a stack of notecards and make an “I’m happiest when…” list. Think about everything that makes you smile, everything that fills your heart with that exhilaration we all crave. Not just career goals, or obvious vocations. Try and be as specific as possible; don’t just list a TV show, list why you love that TV show. List what particular moment of your sport or your vacation or your job makes you happiest.

Step 3: Make a “Wildest Dreams“ List If you’ve seen The Greatest Showman, I like to think of the song “A Million Dreams”. There are a few songs in the world that aren’t just beautiful, they put into words a feeling or experience you never thought you could explain to anyone, and “A Million Dreams” is one of them. “Every night I lie in bed, the brightest colors fill my head, a million dreams are keeping me awake.“ Just like you did with your last list, make a list of all of those dreams. The sane ones, the crazy ones, the ones that you can’t explain… they all go on the list.

Step 4: Find Where These Lists Overlap Look through both your lists, and find common themes. This is where it can be handy to have your lists on notecards. Arrange the notecards into themes of things you love, and pay attention to the ones that keep popping up. For me, a lot of my loves and dreams centered around performing, storytelling, and fandom.

Step 5: Write a Mission Statement Call it a mission statement, elevator pitch, objective… whatever floats your boat, you’re going to need an answer for when people ask you what you want to do with your life (and that’s why you’re doing this exercise). The secret is, that answer doesn’t need to be a job title. Take a look at the themes you’d found, and think about how they can fit together. Your mission statement should touch on the major points that you know for certain you want. For me, I’d realized I didn’t want to stay in publishing, but I still absolutely love storytelling, particularly rich and detailed stories. I knew I loved the spotlight. I knew I was interested in TV, film, and theme parks, but didn’t know which one, so I wrote a mission statement that worked for any of those.

Step 6: Articulate your Direction Now that I had a Mission Statement, when people asked me what I wanted to do, I had an answer. Eventually, I told enough people my long term goals that some of them had solid ideas on what I should do in the short term. And just like that, I had a path. I knew where to go next and what to do next, and I could act on getting there.

Step 7: Take the First Step Now, all that’s left is to do it.

If you’re interested in going even deeper, check out The Artist’s Way. It’s been around for twenty-five years, but it has a lot of great exercises for unlocking your creativity. Chapter nine in particular has some similar ideas to what I did.

In truth, figuring your life out is a process. Interests change, information is scarce and the more you learn the more your path will shift, but that’s okay. Figure your life out for today, and tomorrow you can figure it out again.

*staying up until 3am not required, or technically advised

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In the words of Olaf’s latest song

I am with you in this (drawing)

I am with you in this rhyme

I am with you if you need me

Any moment, any time.

The warmest of hugs and happiest of trails to the entire cast and crew of Frozen Broadway. Thank you for all the magic you’ve made night after night.

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Elsa tells Anna that the spirits agreed, and I just couldn’t get the image of the Nøkk, Bruni, an Earth Giant, and the literal spirit of wind, none of whom talk, sitting down to make Important Decisions. (I poke fun out of love)

Favorite details: Nøkk’s mane is making puddles, Bruni has scorched the table top, and the Earth Giant is about to break his chair. Gale is giving a thumbs up because to my knowledge they have no other way of communicating.

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Did I like Frozen 2? Yes, but it’s complicated.

Warning: the following review contains spoilers for Frozen 2, as well as many surrounding Frozen stories including Frozen: The Musical, Frozen, and Olaf’s Frozen Adventure.

After six long years, Frozen 2 is finally in theaters everywhere, and I was fortunate enough to attend the World Premiere in Los Angeles which means opening night last night was my second viewing of the film. To date, I’ve seen Frozen 2 twice, Frozen around twenty-five times, read all three Frozen novels plus The Art of Frozen and the comics, seen Frozen: The Musical once and Frozen: Live at the Hyperion half a dozen times, memorized the commentary and outtakes for the original soundtrack, the Broadway soundtrack, and the sequel soundtrack, watched every interview I can find, saw the creators speak three different times at D23 Expo, watched the original Making of Frozen mini-documentary, and listened to the “Inside Frozen 2” podcast. Which is why this review borders on a literary analysis and, at eleven pages long, is longer than many of my college papers.

When Frozen came out six years ago, I became The Frozen Girl. Some girls are sorority girls. Some girls (like Elsa, apparently) are horse girls. Some girls are skater girls. I was The Frozen Girl. I saw the original in theaters ten times. And, I feel I should preface this, I still love Frozen. My love has not wavered over the years. Six years ago I was Elsa for Halloween a month before the movie’s release (and contrary to cultural memory, there was almost no pre-release marketing for the movie, so I spent the Halloween season fielding questions about why I would braid my hair for a Cinderella costume). This year, I flew to New York for one night to see Frozen Broadway, and in a few weeks I’m flying to LA for the opening night of the Frozen: The Musical tour.

All that to say, I view this movie differently from the average filmgoer. I have spent the time studying the franchise: its canon, its creative process, the legacy of the filmmakers, the nuances of the art and script, its cultural impact, that most people spend on their college minor. I certainly look at it through heart-shaped glasses, but also through a deep understanding of exactly why I, and so many others loved the first one (and it varies wildly by person). So of course, I have Opinions.

In many ways, the sequel lived up to the high expectations that come with that love. No, the soundtrack doesn’t have “the new Let It Go”; those shoes are too big to fill for the much touted “Into the Unknown” or even the incredibly moving (and in my opinion superior) “Show Yourself.” But the soundtrack fits the movie and supports the story in the way only the best musicals’ tracks do. “Do the Next Right Thing” is one of the most moving songs in the Disney repertoire, and it dares to explore a darkness Disney is not known for even mentioning. “Some Things Never Change” is the most underrated song on the track: it sounds the way I feel when the curtain comes up on a live musical and as someone perpetually wrestling with change, it’s soothing in the same way “Let It Go” is.

Olaf was a pleasant shock to me. I always liked him well enough for one liners, but mostly understood his importance to the story rather than feeling any genuine affection for him. To be quite frank, I mostly skip his parts in Olaf’s Frozen Adventure. Olaf in Frozen 2, however, has matured into something just old enough to be completely relatable. I, too, struggle with the increasing complexity of thought that comes with maturity. Change mocks me, too, with her beauty. I, too, like to tell myself that this will all make sense when I am older, and now thanks to Olaf I can tell myself that with a song. And I, too, drive my family up the walls with fun facts on road trips, though most of my fun facts are Disney themed.

As a bonus, Olaf’s retellings of Frozen and Frozen 2 (hope you stayed for the post-credit scene) were utterly hilarious, rivaled only by Lt. Mattias’s reaction to the story.

Bruni the Fire Salamander is the light of my life, and my biggest movie related complaint about him is that they never bothered to say his name in the movie and I only know it because of a character description press release two months ago. (My other complaint is that he does not come in life sized merch, just oversized merch. I want a beanie-baby sized plushie). Every time he makes his tiny little croak and jumps with his legs out like a starfish my heart grows three sizes. If Bruni was in the movie any longer my heart might’ve burst altogether.

“Show Yourself” is one of the most cinematically spectacular scenes I’ve ever seen in animation. Everything about it, from the composition, to the costume design (Elsa with her hair down. Enough said.) to the lighting, turns my artist eyes into hearts. Don’t even get me started on the Nokk (the water horse). This scene is what has me coming back for a third viewing.

Beyond the beauty of it, this scene is one of the most powerful messages in the movie in my opinion. If “Let It Go” was Elsa stepping out of her fears and pressures to conform, then “Show Yourself” was Elsa stepping into her power (as the song literally says) and embracing her powers as a gift instead of a burden. She realizes she’s the one she’s been waiting for, she didn’t need anyone else’s acceptance so much as she needed to accept herself. A beautiful message, on par with the caliber of those from the first movie.

I adore the way Anna and Elsa’s relationship has grown, without becoming overly cheesy and smooth. They still fight, they still argue, and they still hurt each other, even if it’s accidentally and always from a place of love. It’s a realistic look at what it means to have a sister, and really to have a relationship with anyone. 

Probably the most controversial element of Frozen 2 is that it’s much darker tonally than Disney is known for. Yes, it went a step further into the darkness than Frozen ever did, but not in a way that I felt was wrong. To me, Frozen 2’s tone is the next step on the tonal trajectory the rest of the franchise has established. Even Olaf’s Frozen Adventure included a heartbreaking scene of Olaf not feeling good enough to be part of the family. If you hadn’t noticed, the original Frozen is dark, it’s just darkness splattered with “In Summer” and “Fixer Upper”.

Personally, I love that the movie dives headfirst into the dark and difficult topics that the first one alluded to without ever showing outright. (I also do not have young children to worry about). It’s one of the reasons that my all-time favorite Frozen story is actually the musical; the musical follows Elsa all the way to contemplating suicide in an incredibly powerful moment as she sings “Monster”- something a Disney movie is revolutionary for even hinting at.

At the darkest point in Frozen 2, Elsa freezes to death and with her gone Olaf dies, leaving Anna to pick up the pieces as the only surviving member of her family. Even more, she sits in the grief in a way most Disney movies don’t. While in Frozen Anna is dead (and Elsa grieving) for less than a minute, in Frozen 2 Anna spends the night in mourning. She goes to that dark place the Broadway musical goes, singing “hello darkness, I’m ready to succumb”. Even when she picks herself up to do “the next right thing,” there isn’t a moment before the reunion where you can’t see the grief weighing on her, even as those around her celebrate their victory. Quite frankly, I think you can even see her grief in the reckless abandon with which she throws herself into destroying the dam, a disregard for her own life that nearly gets her killed.

While certainly the darkest point is “The Next Right Thing”, there are dark points throughout the movie. Elsa’s overwhelming guilt at realizing her parents were looking for answers about her when they died, Anna and Elsa’s fight after Anna runs into fire after her, among others.

Strange though it may seem, these character low points were the highlight of the movie to me. It’s a visit back to what made me fall in love with Frozen in the first place. In Elsa I was able to relate to a Disney Princess (turned queen) in a way I never had before, and in a way I hadn’t come close to since elementary school. For the first time, there was a character who made mistakes. Who was introverted and anxious and didn’t know how to act around people. Who had messy feelings that were more complicated than simply ‘hopeful’ or ‘sad’. And Frozen 2 continues that legacy with explorations into anger at those you love, fear for others, real grief, the betwixt and between-ness that comes with growing up and the realization that everything changes.

As someone who is not a parent but is a former kid, I’m a firm believer in letting kids see conflict and pain and making sure they know how to deal with it, and I love seeing Frozen continue to encourage kids to embrace their messier feelings. There’s a moment where Olaf realizes he’s angry at Elsa, for the first time, and Anna tells him he has every right to be. How often do kids get to have their emotions validated? That’s powerful. And on a story level, I loved the complexity that messier emotions add to the character dynamics.

On that note, I’m so proud of Anna. Anna grew so much in this movie. She hit rock bottom and she found the strength to get back up. That’s a strength I don’t think she would’ve had in the first movie. In fact, in the musical we do get to see Anna hit rock bottom and accept her fate, laying on the floor and freezing to death she sings “now it’s clear I’ll never leave this room. It ends as it began.”

Three years later, Anna picks herself up, and sings “when it’s clear that everything will never be the same again then I’ll make the choice to hear that voice and do the next right thing.” The message that optimism is a choice, and something you have to actively chose every day, is an important message for everyone, not just children, and gives a beautiful dimension to Anna’s trademark happy-go-lucky spirit. A character who is always seeing the bright side is boring. A character who goes against every single experience in her life that should weigh her down and choses to work hard to see the bright side? That’s an interesting character, an aspirational character, and that’s who Anna has become.

Now to the hard part.

As The Frozen Girl, I feel the pressure to sing nothing but praises for the much awaited sequel (and no one awaited it more eagerly than I). But the reality is just a bit more complicated. As much as I loved so many pieces of it, no matter how I try I can’t shake the feeling deep in my heart that this sequel undermined much of what made the original so special. In the end, the things that make me love this franchise are the reason that I most passionately dislike pieces of the sequel.

I talked about Frozen enough in 2013 (and the years since) that I’ve distilled my love into a soundbite: I love Frozen because everyone has something in their life that they wish they could change. Be it illness or a disability or their sexuality or something about the way we look or the way they think or the circumstances we were born into, we all have something that we view the same way Elsa views her powers. And in Frozen, it doesn’t matter how she got her powers, just like it doesn’t matter how we became the way we are, what matters is what she does with them. So when she learns to overcome her fear and find love, it sends a powerful message that whatever our thing is, we can overcome our fear of it too and find love and acceptance in it.

I can’t even count how many times I’ve said that. So when they announced that the driving question behind Frozen 2 was “why does Elsa have powers?” I already knew I would have an issue with the fact that an explanation was offered at all.

In the end, it could’ve been worse, largely because I don’t actually understand their explanation for why she has powers other than “they’re a gift not a curse” and something about the fifth spirit, so it’s hard to find issue with the explanation, or ever really consider it an explanation.

But at the end of the day, I still wish they hadn’t tried to explain it. Because the rest of us? We aren’t getting an explanation for why we are the way we are. No divine voice is coming for us to tell us we’re important or that our snaggle tooth or over-anxious brain or being really bad at math is actually a gift and also by the way here’s your calling you now have a job and a purpose for the rest of your life. We have to be satisfied with singing “Let It Go” for ourselves, because no sixth spirit is going to sing the duet of “Show Yourself” to us.

In the Broadway soundtrack commentary, Kristen Anderson-Lopez says “I hope, for people out there who identify with Elsa, this makes them realize that there will always be love and support for them from somewhere, and in Elsa’s case it’s from her sister.” When I first heard that, I cried, because that is what I love about Frozen. The conflict in Frozen is driven by a protagonist’s fear, not the antagonist’s evil, unlike every single Disney movie before it. And in spite of everything, in the end of Frozen, Elsa is forgiven and accepted for who she is, powers and all. She continues on to live her happily ever after with her new family (or Frohana, as the fandom affectionately dubbed them).

“You belong down in Arendelle” Elsa tells Anna in her ice palace in Frozen. “So do you” Anna replies. And Elsa refuses. Elsa believes she belongs away from everyone, that there is a choice she has to make between being who she is and being with the ones she loves. From there, her entire arc is her coming to the realization that she can have both and even more than that she needs both. Love is the key to controlling her powers in the end. It’s a fact that would have been cheesy if it didn’t make so much sense; if fear makes her powers spiral out of control, then love, as the opposite of fear, should keep them in control. Her family and the love that comes from that supports her powers, and her powers support her family. It comes full circle and everyone lives in harmony.

The story sends a powerful message: you don’t ever have to be alone. No matter what, no matter how different you are, you will find acceptance. I wish six-year-old Brooke, who felt so alone, could have had that, but I’m glad eighteen-year-old Brooke got it.

To me, the ending of Frozen 2 snubbed the entire message. Because no matter if Elsa’s found her place as a fifth spirit, no matter if she’s coming over for charades, no matter if she’s bonding with the Northuldra, there’s no mistaking the fact that once again Elsa is alone. She’s moved back into her metaphorical ice palace and even if this time she’s doing it out of love instead of fear, it feels like a step backwards. As much as I love Bruni, he is not a great conversationalist. Why doesn’t Elsa get to stay with her family? What does that mean for the people who identify with Elsa, that in the end she still ends up an outsider?

Anna, Kristoff, Olaf, and Sven are starting their new life as an even closer family and even if Elsa’s a part of it, even if they love Elsa just as much as always, Elsa will still spend most of her time away. If Frozen gives me hope that someday I won’t always feel like the second-best friend and the last pick for the party, then Frozen 2 makes me doubt it.

There are enough other small issues that I wonder if a major scene was cut from the end, without enough time to replace it. It remains unclear exactly how Elsa unfroze, other than it had something to do with the dam breaking. I still don’t understand what a “fifth spirit” does all day, nor why they suddenly need a fifth spirit when they’ve been fine for years without one. I don’t know what a human bridge is for other than a game of telephone, and a bridge made of two separate parts is flimsy at best. Similarly, couldn’t Elsa just commute from the castle, if she lives that close? Also, it feels like someone/thing is pulling the strings behind voice, the kingdom’s haywire magic, the mist, etc. but none of that is ever addressed. What exactly Atohallan is is still up in the air. Still, I could overlook all of those.

In conclusion (yes, this essay does finally have an end), my love for Elsa and Anna stands. Frozen 2 isn’t perfect. It doesn’t have the beauty that comes with experiencing a story where every string ties together like the first one did. I have fundamental disagreements with the ending. But it’s worth seeing. It continues a story that means the world to me. It has beautiful moments and important messages, even if they don’t fit together, and it makes me laugh and makes me think, which I believe are two of the most important things a story can do.

So yes, I liked Frozen 2, even if it’s a bit more complicated than that.

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“But not too deep or you’ll be drowned”

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Frozen 2 is out today! And I have not stopped drawing it since I saw it at the premiere two weeks ago, so it is definitely worth seeing. And listening to the soundtrack on loop.

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Me? Starting a story with a greek pun and ending it with an Office joke? Never. 

Day 9: Superstition

Cassandra tried not to be superstitious, she really did.

When the bus drove past the graveyard, she didn’t hold her breath like a little kid. Ghosts aren’t real, she recited to herself. Maybe so, but bad luck is the little voice in the back of her mind replied.

When she got a F on her math test an hour later because she’d bubbled the answer one down from what she meant to, she told herself it was because she hadn’t been paying attention, and the sudden gust of wind that blew only her test off her desk had nothing to do with it.

On the bus home from school, she didn’t hold her breath when they drove past the graveyard. If she breathed really slowly well, that was just a coincidence. Just like her math test.

Cassandra didn’t rub her necklace for good luck. Necklaces don’t give off good luck, and she was not superstitious. Rituals, however, could help you feel grounded and make you concentrate better. Really, it was all just mindfulness.

So if she always found a parking spot on the next block after rubbing her necklace, it wasn’t because of the good luck, it was because she was more focused.

Cassandra wasn’t superstitious, not really. She was just really good at reading the world. She noticed things others didn’t, the patterns of timing and occurrences.

So if every streetlight went out right when she went under it, and she knew she was about to get a random text from her ex that night, it wasn’t superstition. It was called being right.

(And she was right. She wasn’t even surprised when her ex texted for the first time in months. The street lights had warned her.)

When her bike was stolen four years to the day after her last bike was stolen, she knew. She knew enough about patterns to identify the similarities. Really, it was her fault for going to the same place on the same day, even if there was nothing obvious about the situation. The average person would have pointed out that she’d been to this café dozens of times since her last bike was stolen, that where she was before and after had nothing to do with the theft, and that October 12th wasn’t any more likely a day than any other day for a robbery.

They’d be wrong. Cassandra knew better, looking back. She’d known when she left the house that morning that the last time she’d gone to the homecoming game was right before her bike was stolen. She’d known that history repeats itself and her life moves in circles. And she went anyways. Cassandra wasn’t superstitious, but she knew better.

When her bike was stolen, Cassandra was bummed about the bike, but she was more bummed that she trapped in a mirroring. The world is just a matter of patterns and cycles. Superstition was useless, but patterns were scientific. Cassandra didn’t believe in ghosts, but patterns she could get behind. And this pattern? This pattern perfectly mirrored a particularly terrible cycle she’d been trapped in four years prior. It had started with her bike being stolen, and ended with her fired from her job at the coffee shop. None of them connected by any obvious causation, and yet she knew with every fiber of her being that all of it was about to happen again.

Cassandra wasn’t superstitious. But maybe, just maybe, she was a little stitious.

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It’s Nice To See You Again

Day 5: Familiar

I was so torn between going with the noun familiar (aka a witch’s pet) or the adjective familiar (what we normally think of when we think familiar) but I didn’t think I could beat Harvey the Familiar from Day 3’s story, so adjective it is. Welcome to Costin.

Ava could barely read it through the chipped paint, but she was pretty sure the sign to the right of the road was supposed to say “Welcome to Costin”.

The town seemed familiar. Ava knew she’d never been there before, she checked the map just in case, to make sure, but yup, she was smack in the middle of West Virgina, and not only had she never been to West Virgina before, but she’d never even been East of the Mississippi before this road trip.

In road trip movies it always seemed so dramatic, so freeing. Just her, her car (her best friend had named it Marcie just before they’d started out on the road), and the highway speeding along beneath her tires. The freedom to stop wherever you wanted, to do whatever you wanted. It seemed like just what she’d been looking for, so when her new employer offered her a plane ticket or gas reimbursement, she’d chosen the latter.

But now, six days later, the thrill had worn off. No American cities are really that different, and all the tourist traps looked more like the back of tourists’ heads than whatever she was supposed to be looking at. Now, Ava was just tired.

This town wasn’t on the map, but she saw Dunns, the town she’d passed through half an hour prior, and saw the road she was on. This place was like the opposite of a paper town, or maybe the map was just old. Her friends had teased her for buying a paper map and a compass, in 2019, but there was something reassuring about it. No matter what happened to her phone, she’d be able to find her way out.

Now, though, she was starting to doubt the map.

She couldn’t put her finger on it but the town seemed absurdly familiar. To her left, the moon rose over the stepel of a blue church. To her right, a small Main Street stretched towards more forest. A diner’s neon sign flickered in the dark. As Ava drove past a faded stop sign, her gas light came on. Cursing, she pulled into the gas station on the next corner.

Of course it had to be one of those off-brand ma-and-pop stations where you had to go inside to pay for gas.

The fluorescent lights cast an unflattering blue over the aisles of potato chips and white claw.

“Ava, always nice to see you again,” the man behind the counter said, as she walked in.

“I— what do you mean?”

“Oh, nothing.” He chuckled. “I suppose you just have to get out of this town.”

Ava eyed him warily, slowly adjusting her keys in her hand so that they were in punching position. He seemed like a harmless old man, but that didn’t mean he was. Even if he didn’t seem a little familiar.

“I do, actually. I’m starting a new job next week.”

“I’m sure you are.” He chuckled again.

“I’m sorry, is something funny?” Ava asked.

“Oh no, don’t mind me. I’m just an old man with much too little amusement in my life.”

Ava’s skin crawled. She quickly grabbed a pack of sunflower seeds off the rack and threw them on the counter. Some off brand she’d never heard of, because of course they were.

“Are you sure you need more sunflower seeds?”

“Just ring it up please. And five gallons of gas.” Ava was losing her patience. This man, this place, this town was creeping her out and she’d had enough of it.

“That’ll be $15.68 total.”

“You know, it’s weird because I thought I had enough to make it to Virginia, but I guess my car isn’t as fuel efficient as I thought.”

“No one ever has enough gas to make it out of this town. Keeps me in business though.”

Ava stiffened. She swiped her card. ERROR starred up at her.

“I’m sorry ma’am, it appears this card has expired.”

“That’s impossible, I just used it this morning.

“Ava—“ the man started to say something and then appeared to think better of it. “It’s fine. It’s on me.”

“No, it’s okay-“

“Just take your sunflower seeds and go.”

Ava walked out of the convinence store, haunted by the shopkeeper’s sad smile. She filled up her tank and got back in the car. She opened her center consol to throw the sunflower seeds in, only to find three identical packs staring up at her. Packs she’d never seen before, but looked all too familiar.

“I’m getting out of here.” She mumbled to herself. She pulled back onto the main road, past a school, a hardware store and a few houses. In minutes, the houses gave way to forest, thick and dark on either side. Ava blew past the “see ya real soon” sign at eighty miles an hour.

“I’d rather not.” She scoffed.

Six hours later, Ava passed a chipped sign that read “Welcome to Costin” and drove into a town that felt all too familiar. To her left, the early morning sun shone over the steeple of a blue church. She couldn’t believe she’d been driving all night, she could have sworn she just left Dunns thirty minutes prior. All this driving was getting to her.

She pulled into the corner gas station for some coffee, and maybe to find out about a hotel for the day. Of course it was one of those off-brand ma-and-pop stations you only find in the middle of nowhere.

The man behind the counter looked oddly familiar.

“Ava, always nice to see you again.”

[worldsocloseimhalfwaytoit]

The Necklace

Hope you enjoyed the high quality art of the first day and a half because I could not keep up with that pace.

Day 3: Crystal

Alyssa had always believed the crystal was magic. She’d known from the first moment she saw it in a dream when she was eight. In the dream she’d found it in an antique store on a street in New York. Not the pawn stars type of antique store, more like a swappers meet quality of a store, as though a folding table full of costume jewelry and dumpster fodder had somehow gotten away from the herd one day and put down roots in the middle of the city until through the sheer force of will it had turned itself into a building.

Alyssa had never really remembered her dreams, but she remembered that one. She’d been looking for the crystal ever since, with no idea why she needed it, just a firm senseless conviction that can only come from childhood naivety that she would need it, one day, and that when she did need it she would find it.

She looked everywhere. The dream had said New York, but perhaps it had just been in New York when she dreamt it, and now it had moved. Or perhaps New York was a metaphor for another city. She didn’t know, and she didn’t particularly care. She was no superhero, no powers to dream the future and she’d never studied up on dream interpretation beyond the occasional Google search when she was in the center of a too loud party she didn’t want to be at. Whether it was New York or not, Alyssa stopped into every antique, scrape, or secondhand store she passed. She’d seen it all; giant polar bears, old postcards with meaningless platitudes, ugly jewelry from the 80s, and thousands of crystals.

In the end, it wasn’t a shop in New York. It was in Sydney, Australia, just a few blocks off of Circular Quay, down a side street she’d never noticed before (but she was new to the city anyways so who was she to be thinking she hadn’t noticed it before). She was already late to her appointment but the second she passed she knew she had to stop in anyways.

The door chime echoed through the store. It was bigger that it looked from the street, a maze of stuff, of every shape and size. In piles and baskets and leaning towers, like something out of a Harry Potter book or maybe the Lord of the Rings Shire, if the Shire had ever had reason to have thirty foot ceilings. One pile of books stretched from the floor to the ceiling, looking as though the only reason it hadn’t tumbled was because it might be holding up the roof itself.

“Hello?” Alyssa called out, as she began to pick her way across the room. She clutched her bag to her chest, terrified that one wrong move would set off the world’s largest game of dominos and she’d be crushed in the avalanche.

A basket marked “last missing puzzle pieces” perched atop a pile of lunchboxes.

It was as though every piece of trash or treasure that someone cared about had found its way, through some magnetic pull, here.

“Nonononono!”

Alyssa pulled her hand back just as an eccentric looking man leapt out from behind a stack of magazines. He looked like the store, personified. If Urban Outfitters was a person it’d be a VSCO girl. If Free People were a person it’d be a hippie. And if this store were a person, it would be the man now standing in front of her.

“Don’t touch. Only looking.”

“I was just trying to fix—”

“Ah ah ah. Only. Looking.”

“Okay…do you happen to have any crystals here?”

“But of course! What type. Crystal balls, crystal watches, crystal rings, loose crystals, crystal necklaces—”

“Necklaces”

“Ah! And can you describe the necklace to me?”

“Well, I kind of, I mean,”of all places to finally begin to feel silly about this “IguessIsawitinadream” Alyssa mumbled.

“Excuse me? I can’t hear.”

Alyssa took a deep breath and cleared her throat. “I saw it in a dream. So I don’t know that it’s real.”

“That’s okay, describe the way you saw it in the dream.”

“It’s small. Only about an inch long. It’s a turquoise that I’ve never seen in a crystal; that’s what makes me think I’ve never managed to find it. It has a silver chain, that wraps

The man thought for a moment, and then turned abruptly, striding across the room fast enough that Alyssa had a hard time keeping up. “Come with me” he called over his shoulder.

Stuff flew by, faster than Alyssa could process it all. A rack of wedding gowns, “never worn” the sign above them read. Shelves full of single shoes spilling into each other. To her right, enough makeup bags to fill a Sephora played an ambitious game of Jenga, followed by a row of pens and pencils jutted out of tubes. A pile of stuffed animals and baby blankets, most of them worn beyond recognition, spilled out of a room to Alyssa’s left.

“How can this stuff possibly sell?” “Some of it won’t. But it has a home here anyways. What’s that saying, about one man’s trash? Hmm…” he looked at her through his monocle. “All of this is here because it’s someone’s treasure. Now, come along, come along” he waved her into yet another room, and then up a flight of stairs.

“Stamps. Coins. Lots of watches and rings. No phones. People don’t really care about them, they only care about what’s on them. Plenty of pictures though. I always say there’s enough to write a book.” He winked. Alyssa stared back, confused.

“Ah! Here we are. Necklaces, with rocks, Acquired in 1950s and beyond. This should be the room. Now, let’s get your crystal back.” He walked to the nearest glass jewelry counter and began unlocking it with a giant ring of keys.

“Oh, it’s not mine” Alyssa hastily corrected.

“If it’s here and you came for it, then it belongs to you, whether you knew it or not.--” The man riffled through the counter and pulled out a crystal.

This was it. Alyssa realized it as soon as the man laid it on the counter. It was beautiful, the vague idea from her dream so many years ago brought to life. She could see now, the details that had always been too hazy for her to make out. She’d filled in the blanks over the years with her own ideas, but here it was in person. The way it clasped in the back was the way she’d expected, but the fine chain looped over the crystal at a different angle. The imperfections shone in a way she’d never been able to capture in drawings.

She reached for it. All this time and it was real. She’d really found it.

“--But think on it carefully; sometimes we lose things for a reason,” the man finished, snapping her out of her reverie.

Alyssa paused. She was so late for her appointment, and hadn’t even bothered to call. What had she been thinking? How was a goose chase for a crystal supposed to fit into her life?

Then again, if something as crazy as stopping into this shop couldn’t fit her life, maybe her life needed a little changing.

Looking the man in the eye, Alyssa raised her chin.

“I’ll take it.”

[worldsocloseimhalfwaytoit]

Until the Witching Hour

Day 2: Witching Hour

Lilla had never stayed up until the witching hour before. She’d always been tucked in tight, fast asleep by the light of the little night light spell her mother left for her before heading out.

But this year was different. She was seven, a big girl now, and more determined than ever to stay up for the most important witching hour of the year. It had been a great Halloween. She’d gotten to wear her brand new witch robes to school and show them off to all her friends, because her moms weren’t worried about her letting anything slip anymore. She’d proven over the past year what a great secret keeper she was. She’d eaten candy with all her best friends, and after the trick or treaters all went to bed Auntie Bella had taken Lilla out for a spin on her brand new broom.

“Halloween is the best night of the year, little one.” Auntie Bella had told her as they flew through the air. “We can fly freely, because magic comes alive on Halloween, but the humans have taught themselves not to believe their eyes.”

“That’s so silly” Lilla said. “All the magic is right in front of them, if they’d just reach for it.”

“Maybe so. But it’s better that they don’t. More for us” and with that Auntie Bella had leaned into a dive, soaring them both back to Earth as Lilla giggled.

Now, dressed in her pumpkin pajamas, Lilla held her breath and listened. A door opened and shut, and the house was quiet. She clutched her stuffed cat to her chest and slowly pulled the covers back. She rolled to the edge of the bed and eased silently off of it, keeping the mattress from creaking. She wished Auntie Bella would show her the silence spell already, or even a floating spell, but every time she asked her Auntie got a look in her eye, like she just knew Lilla would use it for no good.

Adults were so frustrating sometimes.

Lilla crept down the hall, one foot at a time. It was agonizingly slow. Step by step, she made it down the hall, around the corner to the living room. She was almost to the back door.

Two shining eyes appeared at the end of the hall, and Lilla’s heart raced. She froze, blood pumping in her ears. Maybe if she stood really still he wouldn’t see her.

“You know you can’t go out,” the cat blinked, the shining eyes disappearing and reappearing in an instant. He slinked forward, out of the shadows. With his black fur he’d been almost invisible.

Lilla felt her heart sink. She dropped her frozen pose and pouted. Harvey was supposed to be out with the witches. “Please don’t tell!” she begged. “I’ll give you extra milk for the rest of the month if you don’t.”

“I don’t even drink milk”

“You can watch Sabrina the Teenage Witch as much as you want. I’ll even pull it up for you on mom’s ipad.”

The cat gave a head tilt, and what Lilla thought could almost pass for a smile. “I won’t tell, but you need to get back to bed.”

“I just need to see it for myself. And then I’ll go back to bed I promise. Please please please please!”

“You can’t go outside—” Lilla’s heart sank “—but how about I show you something before going back to bed.”

Lilla nodded excitedly. Something was better than nothing.

Harvey padded around the dining room table and hopped up on the window sill. “Now, we just have to wait for the witching hour.”

She stood there, elbows on the sill, pulling her chin up just above it, for what felt like hours. The backyard was dark. The same grass she liked to play tag on looked like it could hold mysteries in the moonlight. Her abandoned pink Barbie scooter could be a monster, lurking in the dark.

Her eyes were beginning to droop when the grandfather clock in the hallway boomed out its first chime. Lilla jumped.

She held her breath. It was finally here. Outside, nothing changed, until finally a small figure rose up from beyond the trees.

“There!” Lilla exclaimed.

She hovered in front of the moon, waiting, as another joined her, and then another. For a minute, the entire coven, Lilla’s moms and aunts and sisters and cousins hovered there, silhouetted against the full moon. And then, just as quickly as they’d appeared, they took off again, shooting off from the moon and up into the sky.

She pressed her nose forward, rising up on her tippy toes to get a better view, before rising off the ground entirely as her magic responded to her wish. The witches swooped through the air, their laughter carrying through the stars, and for the first time Lilla understood, just a little bit, why humans cared so much about magic, even when they didn’t believe, even when they didn’t have any. Even without being a part of the witching hour, even without flying with them, Lilla could feel her heart soar. And maybe, seeing that magic, knowing that sisterhood, was a little bit of its own magic, a magic that humans and witches could share.

Harvey nodded. “Happy Halloween Lilla,” he said. “Now it’s off to bed before I hear about it in the morning.”

Lilla nodded as she let out the yawn she’d been fighting. She climbed back under the cool sheets and hugged her stuffed cat to her chest. Harvey curled up at the foot of her bed.

She drifted off to sleep, to dreams of spinning through the stars and dancing on the wind.