Iâm happy for you ⌠2
kristineyoshaii said to writingchalamet:                                 Hi I love your stories đâ¤ď¸ can
Hey guyyyss! Itâs been nearly 2 years since I have posted anything, Iâm so sorry firstly I would like to say I hope everyone has been managing okay through this pandemic, I have been working throughout the whole thing so have had no time to do anything, but I now have 3 months off due to an illness so Iâm hoping that means more time for writing, while Iâm back I want everyone to know that this is still an open space for ideas and if anyone needs to talk please feel free to message me! Lots of love! Oh and by the way I am completely winging this one shot Iâm making it up as I go along so letâs hope it turns out ok!
It had been seven months since TimothĂŠe had left the apartment. The first month you spent mostly sobbing into his pillow at night, trying to encase your self in whatever scent was reminiscent on it. You would find things around the house of his that he had left behind, like his watch and an old jumper that he would always moan at you for stealing, lying crumpled up at the bottom of the wardrobe. He had left his razor and shaving foam in the bathroom cabinet and you hadnât the heart to throw them away. All things that were replaceable for him but for you they held a certain sentiment.
You used to love sitting on the edge of the bath brushing your teeth as he shaved trying to hold a conversation while your mouth foamed up, which often lead to the pair of you in fits of laughter. So you held onto the razor for safe keeping. Another month past and your friends suggest itâs time for you to get out of the house, other than for work, though you had admittedly found it immensely hard to leave even for that, for walking the streets of New York gave you a new found fear of bumping into him andâŚher.
You had seen them on his social media before removing yourself from the sites, they seemed happy and in love and it killed you, to think that the person you were in love with was in love with someone else, and you donât know how long for. Your tipping edge with social media was a lovely picture of the pair sharing a kiss for her birthday post, which was close to yours. It felt like a knife had been plunged through your chest. On one side you were happy to see him so full of life, something he had been missing the last few moths of your relationship but the other half just wished things could have worked out. You hated the fear of opening your phone to find another picture of them, but at the same time hated the idea of blocking him out of your life, hence your social media blackout.
More months past and eventually things started to feel normal again, youâd plucked up the courage to take down the photos of him surrounding the walls of the apartment and get rid of the rest of his belongings. Youâd even decided to redecorate the apartment to make it feel more you, and less him. Strolling down the aisles of a hardware store with your friend Oscar you look through what seems to be a thousand shades of green before landing on the perfect one.
âNow y/n are you sure you donât like breakfast room green?â Oscar gives you stern but playful look, you can tell he is getting tired of looking at paint cans but you are just glad to have some company. âNo, I definitely think itâs forest green for me thanksâ you smirk and take the paint can from his hands and place it back on the shelf. âWhat else is on the list?â Oscar asks hesitantly, youâd already been shopping for an hour and weâre too ready to get back home. âNothing, this was the last thing so letâs goâ
You had found tranquillity in your new environment and in being alone, but still didnât have the confidence of going out, admittedly there were times you forgot TimothĂŠe existed, your friends refused to bring him up and you never went on your phone anymore to see anyone mention him. But seven moths down the line you still havenât let loose and lived your life since heâs been gone.
âCâmon y/n you have to come, itâs Christmas Eve, you canât sit in alone all night, especially when youâre not seeing your family tomorrow, for one night just please câmon!â Your closest friend Erica pleaded to you over the phone, there was a Christmas party happening in the east village and for weeks now you had been putting off the invite, always coming up with some excuse or the other but she knew you better than anyone and she knew the only reason you didnât want to go was because of TimothĂŠe. âY/n, Iâm gonna keep begging until you say yes, please please please please please plea-â âokay fine Iâll go, just please shut up, and if we bump into him, Iâm leaving okay!â You protested eyes scrunching, you held your phone away from your head as you heard Erica screech from the other end of the line. âYes, okay deal, but he wonât be there, in all of New York I can guarantee there will be at least a hundred parties going on tonight so donât worry yourself, just put on something sparkly and Iâll see you in an hour!â
An hour passes and sure enough there is a short buzz from the intercom to your apartment, you walk over to the door picking up the phone checking itâs Erica, âhello?â You quiz, âyeah itâs me genius you expecting anyone else, now let me up itâs snowing and Iâm freezing!â She snaps you laugh and buzz her in. Shortly after you hear her heals clicking up the stairs in the hallway, you left the door on the latch for her to walk straight in. You eyeball her appearance and your eyes nearly pop out of your head. âSeriously Erica, a slip dress and a leather jacket? Youâre gonna get hyperthermia whereâs your coat?!â You practically shout , waltzing towards her, âwhat are you my mother! Now put on a red lip and letâs go!â You roll your eyes but do as she says to save yourself an argument. You put on your coat hat gloves and scarf and make your way back out the bedroom. âJesus Christ youâre supposed to look like angel Gabriel not the Virgin Mary, why have you covered up so much!â âBecause itâs winter Erica. And in case you didnât know, you can take off clothes but you canât recover from pneumonia when youâre dead, so I suggest you wrap up and shut up because weâre gonna be late.â Her mouth drops in shock but soon closes in the realisation that this is the first time she has seen the ârealâ you in months, she borrows a coat and you both head out the door.
The party is already in full swing by the time you both arrive. You soon find the rest of your friends and you have to admit you have missed going out and socialising and just feeling normal again. You dance abs drink and have a good time feeling all the festivities. You admire the Christmas lights that gleam around the room and the open fire and stop for a second and think about tomorrow, how this will be your first Christmas not spent in the chalamet household, with his mums cooking, and watching him and his sister joke and feeling part of a family. It all gets too much just for one split second. You breathe âIâm just gonna go and get some airâ you smile at your friends so they donât let on that youâre not okay. They have spent too long missing out on things because of you, you donât want them to lose another night.
You weave through the crowds of people everyone and then muttering a âsorryâ as you bump into someone. You finally see the patio doors insight and walk just a little bit faster, not looking at all where youâre going when you crash into someone with their hands full with at least four drinks in their hands. The cold liquid spills all down your front and you gasp at the icey liquid touching your skin. âI am so sorry, I wasnât looking where I was going I-â you would recognise that voice from anywhere, it was him.
Though as soon as his eyes met yours they dropped, as though he felt guilty about something, but what did he have to feel guilty about? You stood there for a moment like a deer in the headlights just staring at him before you bolted in the opposite direction, headed for the front door. âY/n! Y/n come back, shitâ you distantly heard your name being called but you didnât care, you donât know why you ran but you just knew you werenât ready for whatever was about to happen. You reach the front door and run out into the snow, quickly realising what a terrible idea it truly was having forgotten your coat inside, luckily you still had your bag, so it would only be a short walk to a main road to hail a cab. You shivered as the freezing air pinched your skin like daggers. You silently thanked yourself for wearing boots instead of the stiletto option you were going to go for, though still tricky to walk as the heels of your boots have you little to no grip on the snow. âY/n⌠y/n please wait!â You heard behind you and the front door slamming, though you had gotten quite far down this ridiculously long drive way you could still make out his figure bundling towards you. âGo away TimothĂŠe!â You yelled back towards him careful not to slip as your twist yourself back to face him. âY/n youâre gonna freeze out here, please just come back insideâ you hear him speeding up and soon after a thud followed by a grunt, you turn yourself to see him lying on his back in the snow. âAre you alright?â You yell, you donât wait for a spoken response his nod and his sitting up is enough for you, he has gained enough distance now to be in reach of you, so you decide to turn around again and make your way to the road. You stand there for a few moments waiting for a cab to drive past before bailing one down.
When one pulls up you slide yourself in the backseat, and miss TimothĂŠeâs slick manoeuvre into the other passenger side next to you. âHey! What do you think youâre doing!â You whisper shout at the boy beside you. âMaking sure you get home okay, you still live at the apartment?â You give up protesting and nod facing the front. TimothĂŠe tells the driver the address and you sit in silent the rest of the journey. You arrive at the apartment and TimothĂŠe follows you up to the flat, you open the door and he steps inside for the first time since his departure. He takes in a deep breath and looks around the place a lot has changed since he had left, the place looked more girly, more to your taste, but In TimothĂŠeâs mind it still felt like home. He walked around the front room stopping at the picture frames that used to hold his images, he stopped and started at them and frowned for a moment, for his spot had been taken by your friends and family, and pictures of cats, you had always loved cats and the pair of you had always spoken about getting one some day.
âI like what youâve done with the placeâ you let out a breath and nod your head. Your heals clicking against the hardwood floor as you shuffle your feet. âWhat are you doing here Timmy?â âTimmy, been a long time since you called me thatâ you interrupt him âyou didnât answer my questionâ. He sighs and looks you dead in the eye. âAmy and I broke up, a while ago actually, I wanted to call you, text you, I even stood outside the building a few times waiting to see if youâd come outside, I never saw you though. I figured youâd moved on, moved out of the apartment.â
âNo I never left. In fact tonight was my first actual time out of the house since we broke up, so while youâve been out having a good time enjoying your life. Iâve been here miserable, everyday. So I ask you again, what are you doing here?â A tear slipped from your eye as you realised he had only come he to gloat.
âIâm still in love with you y/n, thatâs what Iâm doing here.â He launched himself towards you his hands wrapping themselves around your arms but you protested, Shoving him away from you, you trod around to the other side of the sofa creating some space between you much like he did all those months before. âNo, TimothĂŠe you donât get to do that. You donât get to come into my home after all these months when Iâm finally getting back to normal again and turn things upside down because thatâs not fair! I waited for you for months, I kept your things, I kept your photos up for fuck sake I didnât even wash the bed sheets because I didnât want to wash away anything that had been touched by you. And you never showed upâ you break into a fit of sobs finding it hard to breath being around him after so much time. He stumbles towards you naturally in his mind to comfort you, you try and push him away but he only pulls you closer.
âPlease, Iâm sorry, Iâm so so sorry, I donât know why I did what I did, but all I can do know is tell you I love you, shh please calm downâ he strokes the hair away from your face occasionally kissing the side of your head, he keeps cradling you out of fear youâll slip away like he did all those months ago. You gain your steady breath back and scramble your way out of his lap, the large sequins on your dress shaking and knocking together as you stand, you wipe the tears from your face and head towards the kitchen for a glass of water, once youâve contained yourself you stare at the boy in front of you. He looks disheveled and out of sorts but all you know is you still love him.
âI love you too, TimothĂŠeâ his head raises in hope and he takes a step closer, your hand reaches out to stop him before he can get any closer to you. âBut you broke my heart, and I donât think I can trust you not to break it againâ your eyes fill with tears again and you feel your heart sink in your chest even more than it did the last time. âI think you need to go, Timmyâ he nods his head eyes not leaving the floor. He reaches door as he makes his way out he turns to you once more ây/n, if you have truly moved on with your life, Iâm happy for youâ and then the door is closed.
