Xander's blog

please stop saying I look like an arcade carpet

[x-men-reject]

Ring ring

Ring ring

'Yello?

[INTRO]

Name? Xander Cooperman. Basic, I know.

Age? Twenties, why's it matter?

Occupation? Well I TRIED joining the Xmen. Didn't take.

Mutation? Awful personal dontcha think? Ask again later.

Wait.. who even is this?

click!

[Don't get too freaky. More info below.]

- Xander Cooperman, age 22

Mutation: Can fuse with fellow mutants, the fusion gains enhanced durability. Any injuries sustained in this state only impact Xander.

Appearance: He's most often seen in varying patterned buttonups. Most of which are quite colorful and, unsurprisingly, look like what you'd find on an arcade carpet. Hence, the insistence to not call him such a thing. His hair is brown with silver streaks dyed into it, in reference to his friend Peter.

Relationships: He has been often seen hanging out with Peter Maximoff and/or Cameron Crowe [ @decaffein8ted ]. He's basically "best friends" with those two.

He loathes the Xmen, resentful he was denied. This extends to Charles, though he unfortunately respects him too much to actually make his dislike known. He likes Hank though, thinks he's neat.

[x-men-reject]

I miss Peter duuude. Life's so lame without him buzzing around.

[quickie-for-real]

Well, hey, I'm here, buddy! :] ya kinda missed a couple chapters but that's a-okay!

[x-men-reject]

Any Peter is a good Peter- but man mines like toootally bailed! Xmen missions beating his ass its so lame.

I heard you had a baby i think?? Congrats?? That's so weird to think of idk my Peter could never be a dad no offense to him.

[x-men-reject]

I miss Peter duuude. Life's so lame without him buzzing around.

[x-men-reject]

Would you still love your Peter if he was turned into a badger? 🦡

Id debatably love him more. Badgers are adorable!!!

Hes like.. not gonna get turned into a badger right?

[x-men-reject]

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!!! Im getting krunk

[quickie-for-real]

Uhhhh,,,, happy Thanksgiving, folks. Ames and I are going with Puff and the asshole cat to her parents for the weekend.

Wish me luck.

[x-men-reject]

Good luck, man!

[x-men-reject]

Favourite Christmas song?

Its november..

Anyway probably jingle bells! I have a weird Santa/Snowman animatronic thing that sings it. Awesome but scary as shit when you dont expect him to turn on

[x-men-reject]

Never work in retail, sucked out my soul and fired me when I ran out

[quickie-for-real]

Just had the most embarrassing moment of my life,,,,

Note to all: keep track of where the keys to your sexy handcuffs are, otherwise you may need your wife to get your metal bending kid half sister to unlock them and it's really embarrassing

[quickie-for-real]

You do not know humiliation like having your little sister laugh at you while you're butt-ass naked, covered in like just a blanket and cuffed to a bed while she drops all the weird kid lingo and makes you feel old

[x-men-reject]

Booty butt ass? Yikes, man

[x-men-reject]

Evil mutie prick, go back to the lab you crawled out of you freak of nature!

Ive finally made the big leagues!

[x-men-reject]

Why dont I get mutant slurs in my ask box? Am I not mutant enough?

[quickie-for-real]

...uh oh.

Been babysitting my wife's nephew and nieces, and uhhhh

Gotta try cuttin off my nuts so I don't ask her for something stupid

[x-men-reject]

You will not baby.

*waving hand magically*

You will not baby.

[quickie-for-real]

...but cute lil duck onesie thoooo

[quickie-for-real]

Update, this didn't work. I still want to baby.

[quickie-for-real]

...GUYS YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHAT!!!!

[quickie-for-real]

Finally bought a lil duck onesie :)

[x-men-reject]

Are.. you having a baby?!?

[theamazingnightcrawler]

Oh no, I experienced a thought

[quickie-for-real]

Wish I experienced those :]

[x-men-reject]

Imagining a tumble weed rolling by in Peter's head

[quickie-for-real]

show us mr dibbles

Old photo of him, but he looks so cool

[x-men-reject]

Oh hes awesome I continue to love this guy

[quickie-for-real]

Pregnancy test roulette with the wife, let's gooooo

[quickie-for-real]

...why is one of them positive?

[quickie-for-real]

Update, wasn't me!

[quickie-for-real]

...WAIT

[x-men-reject]

HUH?

did she bone someone else???

[lycanthropy-insanity]

You think so little of me, Xander...

[x-men-reject]

WHAT ELSE!!! AM I TO THINK!! WHEN THE HOMIE IS LIVE BLOGGING WITH NO FURTHER CONTEXT!!!

[quickie-for-real]

Pregnancy test roulette with the wife, let's gooooo

[quickie-for-real]

...why is one of them positive?

[quickie-for-real]

Update, wasn't me!

[quickie-for-real]

...WAIT

[x-men-reject]

HUH?

did she bone someone else???

[quickie-for-real]

Is this tummy ache from me eating too much crap, or am I experiencing morning sickness? The world may never know,,,,

[quickie-for-real]

Hey, what's the omegaverse thing again? I forgor

[x-men-reject]

You mean like.. Alpha Beta Omega?

Please. Dont ask why I know that.