Proud Muslimah

Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh. Reverted Muslimah. 28. MI.

[qamaree-deactivated20200905]

‘O my Rab, I am in need of whatever goodness you grant me.’

[curveyhunnie]

[sea-2]

.إياك ومَن لا يخاف الله حتى لو أحَبّك

Be careful with people who are not afraid of God, even if they love you.

[abvya]

My Lord, remove from my heart the love of everything that You do not love.

[egypt-museum-deactivated2021071]

[xaproudmuslimah]

Went to eid festivities at the masjid. It was separated so my husband went to one side and me and the boys went to the other side. I have never felt so lonely being surrounded by that many people before. Everyone knew each other and was talking, laughing, celebrating together while I just sat there watching wondering if I’ll ever fit in.

[xaproudmuslimah]

are your twins identical or fraternal? ☺️

Identical.

[xaproudmuslimah]

I cannot for the life of me figure out a way to get my twins to sleep better. They fight their sleep every night then wake up twice during the night for a bottle.

[xaproudmuslimah]

Help Zainab! The blood she needs has to be from people of Pakistani, Indian, or Iranian descent.

https://www.oneblood.org/zainab/rare-donor-form.stml

^^^ the link for information about donating to her.

They prefer donors in US.

[unbotheredmuse]

why is being alive so expensive. i’m not even having a good time

[xaproudmuslimah]

Did you give them Muslim names? Like Prophet names

Yes both are names of prophets.

[xaproudmuslimah]

What did you name the babies?

I’d prefer not to share their names in social media. Sorry.

[xaproudmuslimah]

Awww what do you mean? What happened to your son if you don’t mind me asking?

They were born early via c section. I didn’t get to hold either of them right away, they were taken right away to the NICU where they spent 28 & 40 days there until I could bring them home.

[iwillfightu]

drained of blood, the heart is white

[imsoofuckingsad-deactivated2018]

do you ever lay in bed and realise how not okay you are ?

[xaproudmuslimah]

I have two overly dramatic babies.

[chiquitamuslimah]

To the revert like me…

To the revert like me who is stuttering and struggling through Arabic

To the revert like me who has to hide Quran/hijab/books/prayer mat/etc because your family doesn’t know or doesn’t understand

To the revert like me who has to pray in secret because they don’t understand or don’t know

To the revert like me who can’t seem to figure out this or that or the other thing that seems so easy to others

To the revert like me who can’t relate to posts about beautiful Muslim families

To the revert like me who has to Google words and text written in Arabic

To the revert like me who is afraid of misunderstanding and misinterpreting

To the revert like me who can’t fight back when people say negative things about Islam because you’re not well versed enough

To the revert like me who has to learn the hard way how intolerant family members and friends can be

To the revert like me who is losing friends and family members because of intolerance

To the revert like me who can’t be open because you found out by accident how intolerant those people are

To the revert like me who doesn’t feel disciplined enough or strong enough

To the revert like me who would like to be comfortable in their faith

To the revert like me who feels guilty for not trusting Allah SWT properly or listening to Allah SWT closely enough

To the revert like me who is afraid

To the revert like me who feels this and so much more…

Keep going. Keep striving to be a better Muslim. Keep stumbling through your Arabic. Keep Googling. Keep having faith. Keep trusting in Allah SWT. Keep your heart full of Allah’s SWT love and never give up on Him because He hasn’t given up on you.