Master of Shadows

Lee Hongki ✗ Shadow Manipulator ✗ 24 Admin / Leader ✗ Bisexual ✗ Single Tent #2 (Midnight Blue) ✗ Cottage #365 Disclaimer: This is a role play blog only. May contain 18+ material.

[xcirque-hongki]

A New Beginning || Hongki x Joon

It wasn’t often that one would find Hongki eating in the dinning tent with the others. It wasn’t like he hated anyone or anything, he more or less just had issues with being around so many loud people all at one time. Often he would take his food back to his tent and devour it there, but something had gotten him out of the tent early and into the food tent before even the cooking crew. It didn’t take him long to whip up a meal of his own. Hongki was an amazing cook, he usually just didn’t care to go through the effort.

And yet, that day he had woken up feeling good. Why? He wasn’t sure. A lot of things had gone wrong lately, and because of certain things, they had lost a lot of money. He knew that he should feel so much more stress than he did, but none of it seemed to matter to him. Recently everything had gotten so much easier for him. Most of his free time since being on the Home island had been spent with Joon and Hongki knew that it was the reason he had been feeling so much better lately.

As horrible as he knew it was, Hongki had realized that his love for Gain was probably not as deep as he had thought it to be. He had truly cared for her, he would not lie about that, but he was starting to wonder if his “love” was that of a 14 year old girl and her first ever boyfriend. He knew that no one would blame him, he had no experience with relationships prior to her and he had always treated her well. He was also glad she died at least knowing she was well cared for, did it really matter if it was the full truth? He would never regret his relationship with her and he knew that if given more time, it might have developed into that, but life had ended up having different plans for him. He knew one thing, it was time to move on. Gain would have hated it for him to just sit around moping.

He just hadn’t expected to find someone he would care about so much again, especially it being someone who had already been there for so long. Their relationship before had been totally just working together, and yet mutual loss had brought them together. Hongki didn’t know if Joon’s feelings ran as deep, yet the pure giddiness he felt when thinking about Joon was enough to get him off of his feet and doing things that he didn’t usually do. Like cooking.

Hongki, however, didn’t stay around for the masses of people. As soon as he was done cooking his food, he grabbed it up and vanished from the dining tent. He wasn’t in so good of a mood as to be suffocated by everyone else trying to get food just after waking up.

Instead, Hongki managed to find a small area that he could eat in alone. It wasn’t so far out of the way that no one could find him, but it would seclude him from most of the members who would be up at that time. It was only after he laid out a blanket and sat down that he realized he had cooked way too much for just himself. He sighed and shook his head, looking at one of the containers of food. “How the hell am I supposed to eat all of this? Good job, dumbass.”

[xcirque-hongki]

The Buddy System || Hongki x Xia

Don’t go anywhere alone. Use the buddy system.

It was one of the most important rules that the small circus had. Sure, Hongki himself had broken the rule several times himself, but that did not make it alright for other members to do. There were so many people out there who were looking for people like them, so many people who wanted to strap them down to tables and cut them open to see how their bodies worked. People like them were a rarity, and having so many talented ‘freaks’ in one area would easily paint a target on their heads if they were not careful. Hence the constant moving.

And yet, Hongki had noticed one girl constantly breaking the rule and slipping out of the circus grounds. He knew that she had recently lost some friends so at first he had stayed silent about it. She didn’t seem to be going far, so what was the point in bothering her? A few weeks of this behavior, however, had him worried –and irritated. Several times he had casually hinted at the fact that she should make sure not to wander off alone without saying it outright and yet, there she was, continuing to do it anyways. Was she really that oblivious to hints, or did she really just not care?

The day before had been the last day that Hongki would allow it, he had promised himself that he would step up and say something if she returned the next day. He hadn’t even told Ahyeon, and he really didn’t want the poor girl to face Ahyeon’s wrath. The girl, Xia as he had found out to be her name, generally slipped out of the circus in the same spot. It was secluded from where most of the members hung out¸ making it a good choice for anyone who didn’t want to be seen. Normally when he noticed her, he was hiding behind one of the tents, but this time he decided to lean against a tree, right out in the open to where she could see him when she was approaching. And there he would wait until she decided to show her face.

[fuckyeahblackhairedidols]

[cliffe-1996]

[kimkrongin]

[xcirque-hongki]

[xcirque-hongki]

Baby Steps || Solo

Shanghai.

Something about the place told him that it would be a new beginning for him. Why? He wasn’t quite sure. It seemed to be a great place for the cirque. Almost everyone had been excited, and the one person who had nearly ran away because of the move had managed to be calmed and given an opportunity to hide from his fears. Some of the members were in a place that was their home land, a place that they felt safe. And to others, it was an exotic place that they could enjoy, somewhere that was a change of scenery from their usual dealings in Korea. Of course, while planning his trip, Dara had come in and informed him that there were rumors popping up all over the internet about their circus and some of the local police were looking out for them. Hence why they had to stay away for awhile. What they were doing was illegal. And if they were found, the circus members would be forced to separate.

Hongki wasn’t going to lose his family again.

And yet, the change of scenery, he knew, wasn’t the only thing that told him that Shanghai would be a new beginning. He smiled softly, a small blush falling over his cheeks as he bit down on his thumb. Joon. They had spent a lot of time together on the main island. And even though Hongki had just lost Gain, he had come to one realization – as much as he had cared for her, what was between them had not quite been love. Hongki was sure that if they had ended up having the time to continue their relationship, it would have been. But no, his heart now beat to a new tune. If he had loved Gain, his feelings would not have so quickly moved on to someone else. He missed her, but she wouldn’t have wanted him to be unhappy, right?

His pace quickened as he walked down the streets of Shanghai, doing exactly the opposite of what he was supposed to do. He had no buddy with him, he had left the cirque grounds on his own on a whim. Most of the other members, even Joon, would be sleeping at that moment in time so most of them shouldn’t be looking for him. No. He had to do this on his own. It was time for a small change, even if it was just a cosmetic one. Hongki pushed open the door to what looked like a salon and walked in. “Hi, I need cut and color…” He said, Chinese broken. And yet, it seemed to be enough for the lady. He was just glad that he had asked Fei to teach him a little bit so that he would be able to help out with guests during performances.

He was quickly led back to his chair and a color book was produced. He pointed to the color he wanted, and was soon relaxing as the color was slathered in place. He nearly fel asleep as the woman worked. She started to sing softly, and yet he didn’t mind it. No, his heart was too light. He was too excited. He knew that he would feel better if he shed some of the weight of his past. His blonde hair had been with him when he had lost so much, so he wanted it to be gone. His thoughts lulled him into a sleep, so it came to him as a shock when the woman was shaking him and telling him to walk to the sink. Had it already been long enough for the color to set in? He yawned and obliged.

With the color washed out, the shears were produced. Hongki had to keep himself from panicking when hair fell to the floor. His hair had nearly been to his shoulders. How long had it been since he had last cut his hair? He wasn’t exactly sure, but he knew it was about time. And the last time, he had cut his hair himself so he had probably done a rather poor job of it, even though everyone had always told him it had looked amazing. The styling tools came out. Hot air blew in his face, hair sizzled from the application of heat over product. And then, a mirror was shoved in his face.

He looked in awe at the styled hair that was now on his head. The blonde that he had worn for so long was gone, replaced by a dark brown that looked almost black. He smiled and ran his fingers through it, admiring how well the cut had been done. He thanked the woman, paid her, and was on his way, a new hop in his step as he headed home. However, as he walked, he started to slow. His eyes moved to his feet and a blush fell on his face. What would Joon think? Would he like it, or would he hate it? Hongki worried his lip with his teeth. If there was one thing he was proud of, it was his appearance. He just hoped that the new object of his affection would like the change, because he wasn’t sure what he would do if Joon hated it. Was the change too much? Hongki shook his head and continued moving. No, he had to be sure that this was what he had wanted.

He needed to move on, and he had to start somewhere.

[xcirque-hongki]

Ignite Me || Hongki x Joon

[cirque-joon]

Arms locked around Hongki’s shoulders, Joon lightly rested his chin on top of his head, eyebrows knitted together in worry and concern as he attempted to soothe fear away from the elder’s mind. With the male’s explanations, however, his stomach sank to his heels, for he couldn’t comprehend one could go on after having witnessed what his mind pictured as a living nightmare. “Shh… Don’t think about it right now,” Joon softly made upon hearing Hongki state he couldn’t get the images out of his mind. Although it was perfectly understandable, it was the last thing the light creator wanted the other to focus on at the moment.

"I don’t think fears are a laughing matter," he murmured back, however not putting too much emphasis on the words, not willing to explain the origin of his opinion. After all, it’d be somewhat lame to mention his own fears as Hongki felt shook up from his own. He wanted to dissipate the other’s panic first thing, comfort him so he would feel better.

And, in hope to help distract him a bit more from the fire and his previous words, he gently slid a hand from the back of Hongki’s head to the nape of his neck, fingertips slightly lingering on his skin before the leader pulled away. The hold Joon had kept on him loosened, but a hand stayed on his shoulder as to sustain a sort of link (though he wasn’t sure who needed said connection the most).

He then let it slide down the length of Hongki’s arm, subtly curling his fingers around the other’s own as he spoke. “I’ll walk you home?” he lightly suggested, the corners of his lips lightly twitching upwards into a warm smile. “I don’t really care for the party anymore,” he added. He however kept silenced the fact that he had been looking for him, so that going back to mingle with the crowd was now useless, unappealing. 

Gently, he scoffed before he began walking again, sand soft and cold beneath his bare feet as he led the way to the cottage he knew to be Hongki’s. The moon shone bright in the sky, high and round, and Joon couldn’t help but notice the soothing, almost romantic hue it added to the scenery. Awkward lump forming in his throat and that realisation, the light creator lightly cleared his throat in hope to get rid of it.

[xcirque-hongki]

Somehow, in Joon’s arms Hongki felt like he was now safe. It was like nothing could get him there and he didn’t want to move away. Things had been getting better for him, easier even, since he had started spending more time with Joon. He couldn’t exactly place why, but he did know that the timing of his recovery wasn’t a coincidence. But how did you thank someone for something like that? But he knew he didn’t have to say anything. Joon had been suffering as well and Hongki had been doing his best to help him get his mind off of things as well. They were lucky to have each other. Whatever the friendship was, it was working for both of them. But was it just friendship? Something in the pit of his stomach told him no, but he wasn’t ready to face that.

Hongki wanted to ask why Joon thought how he did, but he thought better of it. He hated when his own past was brought up, so why bring something up that could possibly trigger the current moment to end? He was glad that Joon had left a hand on him when he had pulled away. Hongki had quickly regretted the decision, but how would it look if he changed his mind and hugged joon again? No. Hongki needed to regain some of his dignity for his own sake.

“Yeah. The sun will be up soon anyways, I’d rather just go sleep early…” Hongki said, stretching a bit as he tried to hide the residual shaking from being frightened. He grabbed Joon’s hand, not caring if it seemed weird or not at that point and started walking towards his cottage. “I know I shouldn’t be surprised that you were at the party, but I am shocked that you happened to be where you were. Were you looking for me or something?” His voice sounded a bit hopeful, which shocked him himself.

“Not that it’s a big deal or anything, I’m just curious…” He tried to say to cover up the fact that he sounded too eager for the answer to be yes. He walked in step with Joon, leaning on his friend’s arm for support. Somehow he felt worn out because of the fire. Why did they have to have those hellish infernos on the beach? Oh right. So people could see. People couldn’t see when the darkness was around them like Hongki could. “Ahh I wish that we could have just strung up lights or something… Stupid beach not having trees…” He muttered, more to himself than anything.

[cirque-ren]

Too Soon? || Ren x Hongki

[cirque-ren]

A smile that would have made the Cheshire cat blush had spread clean across his lips, Ren’s eyes bright with the mischief he surely would spread, even if Hongki turned out to be completely willing for all of this. He did expect that he’d need to persuade the man a bit, but he had a certain way with men that made him rather hard to deny, he had learned a long time ago… Or at least, it felt like a long time ago. It seemed silly, but the teen often forgot how young he actually was.

“I see,” he sang simply, the blond letting his eyes take in the cottage from the inside, since it had been months since he had last seen the place. That distracted him until the tea was made, Ren’s attention darting between the steaming glasses and the elder, him wondering if he should drink some before attempting his move, but he really couldn’t see the wisdom to waiting. That, and once he’d sit down, he’d call too much attention to himself if he stood up again to go over to Hongki.

Instead, he looked over at the blond for an idea on what to do, but when he caught sight of the elder with a hand in his own hair, his imagination took off to a beautifully lewd place, and he knew right then that waiting was no longer an option. Plan formulating right on the spot, he smiled sweetly, eyes shining with appreciation as he started over to Hongki. “That’s quite alright, hyung,” he purred, the blond sliding over and kneeling down next to the couch, “the tea should wake you up soon enough…but in the meantime I think I can help.”

Heart pounding in his chest, he leaned over and finally made his first real move, lips coming into contact with Hongki’s bare chest, his own soft lips sliding reverently over it, as his hand went to rest on his stomach, tracing over the skin there, before going to descend over his jeans. Ren really wanted to go straight in, but he knew a little persuasion would likely be needed first, so he moved to rub the leader over his jeans instead, figuring that if the other freaked out, it would at least be better not to chance his hand getting stuck within those damn things. Kissing a lazy line across his chest, the blonde’s blood started to race, him hoping that the shadow manipulator would give him the feedback he was hoping for, and forget the tea in his place.

[xcirque-hongki]

Apparently, giving someone the benefit of the doubt really just wasn’t a wise decision, especially if that someone was Ren. Hongki watched Ren with inquisitive eyes, unsure of what to make of Ren’s actions. What exactly was the younger male doing? And then, his question was answered, shocking Hongki into a paralyzed silence. Warm lips pressed against his naturally cold skin, creating a shiver that ran up his spine. The contact was foreign and very much unwelcome.

And yet, apparently Ren wasn’t going to stop there. A hand began to rub him, making the unwelcome sensation just that much stronger – strong enough to push Hongki out of his temporary paralysis. Hongki pushed Ren away from him and jumped up, taking a few quick strides away from the smaller blonde. Hongki knew that he shouldn’t be angry, he hadn’t seen it coming and yet.. He couldn’t help it. It hadn’t been long since Gain’s death, he wasn’t ready for something like… that. He felt his nose flare in anger as he tried to control his breathing, heart racing as anger boiled inside of him. “Get out.” His voice was flat, his hands shaking as he tried to control himself. And yet, the shadows betrayed his emotion, darkness seemingly pulling in towards him. “Ren, you are no longer welcome here. You know what I’m going through and you still try… this?! Get out.”

[xcirque-hongki]

Ignite Me || Hongki x Joon

[cirque-joon]

Joon had spent most of the day chatting with people, listening to others talk and admire how the sky went from a bright blue color to numerous shades of pink stained with purple as hours ticked away. The arrival of the night was a sweet reminder that Hongki was most probably awake now, no longer hiding away from the light like a damn vampire. Joon had found out the hard way that the leader didn’t particularly like being up during the day when he first had gone to see him and that the elder had fallen asleep on him almost as soon as they had sat down, but also some few times between then and now when he had had trouble waking him up. In the end, he simply had settled for going to bother him after dusk had laid itself on the world.

And, well, with it being dark enough for the bonfire to be set alight, Joon judged it a good time to begin his search for his friend. He slid past dancing bodies and through chatting circles while carefully observing faces and silhouettes in hope to find Hongki, senses alert to the slightest hint of said man’s presence; his laugh, a glimpse of colored hair, a wiff of his scent. Some orbs of light accompanied him to guide his steps, for despite the bonfire and the dim lighting the moon offered, Joon still felt quite anxious because of the general darkness.

Pausing in his steps, lightly worrying his bottom lip as he squinted his eyes in another attempt to find the man he was looking for, the light creator finally spotted his frame nearby the pyramid of flames some feet away. Approaching that particular emplacement, smile now hung onto his features, he was about to tap on the blond male’s shoulder when a light crack rose from the bonfire, apparently greatly startling him. Catching just in time after he collided with him, Joon managed to keep him in an upright position, all while being confused as to exactly what had happened. Had a piece of burning wood landed on his skin and burned him? Had he simply tripped?

When eyes peered into his, however, he immediately recognized the emotion they held, associating it to the same emotion Baek had had plastered on his features countless times and for various reasons. Heart lurching painfully in his chest at the thought of knowing about Hongki being afraid, mind instantaneously forgetting about Baek, Joon moved to wrap his strong hands aroun the elder’s biceps and spun him around with as much delicacy as he could afford while animated with worry. Once Hongki faced him, unable to see the fire behind him now, Joon mumbled a “Come on, it’s okay,” and began to pull him away, isolating him from the crowd that had gathered around the bonfire and from the bonfire itself. To get Hongki alone and reassure him, that was what was important for now.

One of his arms fell to his side and he slipped his hand in the other’s as they walked, the roaring of the crowd and the music subsiding lightly as he led them towards the cottages. He didn’t walk all the way to his house just yet, though, and stopped in front of a random one, turning to Hongki in order to check on him. Hopefully, with the supposed source of his fear away from him now, the leader would feel better and less afraid. Gaze soft and eyebrows creased in concern, Joon placed his free hand on his friend’s shoulder, letting it linger there for a brief moment before he pulled him in his embrace, muscled arms wrapping almost protectively around his frame.

[xcirque-hongki]

Hongki was thankful that it had been Joon behind him and not someone like Ren. He noticed the confusion in Joon’s eyes, but he did not trust himself enough to speak at that moment in time. What would come out of his mouth? A whimper? Nothing at all? No, he would wait until they could get out of the area – away from the fire and from the people. Hongki didn’t fight it when Joon spun him around. He kept his eyes locked on the other male, trying to will away all of the fear he felt about the fire. And yet, he couldn’t stop the images of charred corpses from filling his head. While he hadn’t been there for the actual fire, he had seen the remains and that was enough.

Hongki nearly panicked as Joon let go of him, but he forced himself to remember that they were far enough from the flickering flames to be safe. Hongki looked down, ashamed to look at the other male. He was supposed to be their leader, someone who was fearless and couldn’t fail them. And yet, one small crack of fire and it sent him fleeing from the party that was his idea in the first place. He winced as the other placed his hand on his shoulder, bracing himself for the jests that seemed to come from anyone else who found out about his fear of fire.

Suddenly strong arms wrapped around him and Hongki blinked, trying to figure out what was going on. It only took a few short moments to realize that Joon was trying to comfort him. Slowly, Hongki brought his arms up and he looped them gently around Joon’s waist, burying his face into his friend’s shoulder for comfort. “I lived with a lot of orphans when I was younger… There was a fire and… Only a few of us made it..” It wasn’t the full truth. The only people in camp who knew of what all happened that day were he and Fei. Maybe one day he would tell Joon, but at that point it was just too painful. “Fire has scared me since then. I just can’t get the images out of my head…” He said, sighing and closing his eyes, reveling in the warmth that Joon provided.

“Thank you. Most people would have laughed and brushed it off,” He said softly. How had Joon known that he was frightened? The other man hadn’t even hesitated before pulling him away from the fire. Hongki pulled away from Joon softly, rubbing at his eyes before forcing a smile. “I don’t think it is the best idea for me to go back. That scared me quite a bit. Will you stay here with me? I’ll understand if you want to go back to the party.”

[hongstars]

[xcirque-hongki]

Ignite Me || Hongki x Joon

Even though he would never readily admit it, Hongki did have a few fears that he kept locked up inside of him. One of those few fears, however, he was trying to stare at in the face, wary eyes watching flickering flames as they danced against the night sky. There was an odd beauty to the delicate way that the flames moved, and yet no one knew the violent power that they held more than Hongki. The faces of those that he had lost because of fire flickered in and out of the flames, and yet there he stood on the edge of the crowd, idly chatting to one of the children of the Circus. He hardly noticed as the kid said he had to go do something and his reply was only half assed , eyes too engrossed in making sure that the flames did not get close.

The fire popped once and  Hongki winced, but the effect was small. He felt his heart race and he shivered , trying to keep himself from running away. It was only the first night of the festivities, he couldn’t be seen running away from the flames. And for once, he was actually sober for an event like this so he couldn’t blame it on the alcohol or anything. No, he had to pretend to be their fearless leader although he knew that none of them expected it. He saw golden eyes staring at him from further away in the darkness, wide with the fear mirrored in his own. Fei. She was just as frightened as he was.

Another loud pop from the flames caused him to jump back as the flames reached out, seemingly trying to grab him and pull him into  their deadly embrace. He stumbled backward, his back colliding with someone’s chest. He was bent at an odd direction, the only thing keeping him up being the strong arms that were now looped under his arms to keep him from falling to the ground. He looked up, eyes wide with fear as they connected with Joon’s eyes. “J-Joon…” He managed to choke out. If anyone could see the fear and him be ok with it other than Fei, it would be Joon. 

[cirque-joon]

Forced Distraction | Hongki & Joon.

[cirque-joon]

Moving his hand away a tad in order to let the other stretch freely, only rolling his eyes playfully at the sleepy actions, Joon let his hand rest of Hongki’s chest for a moment. He was barely aware of that, instead taking note that he should find some sunglasses somewhere in a near future. He resumed his combing gesture in his hair soon enough, and a strange shiver ran across his nerves when Hongki leaned into his touch, humming appreciatively, but he chose to ignore it.

Joon nodded and hummed at appropriate places in Hongki’s speech, listening more than he spoke, seeing as he wasn’t truly talented with words. The elder’s last sentence however made him erupt in a frank and loud laughter, proof that there was no offense taken at all. “Probably because you thought I was annoying, yeah?” he suggested, lips stretched into a grin that let his teeth show. He took his hand from Hongki’s hair for a second and he pressed his palm to his face, pushing down lightly in order to tease him.

"But, uhm… Ren… Is he one of those you want to punch?" Joon asked with a lighter laugh. He didn’t know the blond boy much, but he seemed quite like the troublemaker as far as he was concerned. Plus, with Hongki’s oh so kind words about him, he didn’t have trouble adding two plus two together to understand he was right to a certain extent.

Looking down at the elder and noting how peaceful he looked with his eyes closed, simply lying his head on his lap, the brunet resumed his stroking of his hair once more, the movement coming easily to him. He hadn’t had much of a chance to realize he liked calm, physical proximity in the past, one night stands adding to having friends who didn’t enjoy being touched so much, and then, of course, Baek… Swallowing down a lump in his throat at that thought, he lightly shook his head to shrug off the painful thought, instead refocusing on Hongki and his blond hair.

[xcirque-hongki]

“Well, most people who smile all the time and laugh as much as you do are annoying. Plus the fact that you never seem to be able to keep a shirt on,” Hongki mused slightly, a small smile pulling at his lips as he thought of the countless times he had seen the other without his shirt on. Not that he really had ever minded, Joon was quite possibly the most attractive male at the circus. But still, the seemingly happy-go-lucky manner of the other person had always put him off. Hongki was more of a realist than he was an optimist, even though there were those times where even he would give a bright smile and a lot of laughter.   He now realized that he had judged the other too quickly.

Two years of what could have been an amazing friendship wasted because he wasn’t willing to look past the exterior of another person. Typical of him. He let out a sigh, trying to fight the darkness that threatened to take over his vision. Sleep called to him but he wasn’t quite sure that he was willing to go back into the world of dreams right then. Because, for the first time since Gain’s death, he actually was happy.

When Joon mentioned Ren, Hongki made a grunt and moved his head a bit, trying to pull out of the sleepy stage that was pulling at him long enough to talk. “Yesterday he-“ A large yawn passed over his lips, “- woke me up by knocking on my door. I answered the door with no shirt on –bad call—and it was him. I offered him tea, trying to be nice. People had warned me that he had this obsession with me but –“ another yawn interrupted his speech, “—I had tried to ignore it and try to be nice. But no, his lips went against my chest and his hands… well. Lets just say I never want to be alone with him. Ever. Again. I don’t have any issues with guys. Or kissing guys. Just… He’s a kid and honestly he’s kind of creepy…” He admitted, his words slowing down as they continued. The last sentence ended off in a sleepy whisper, his eyes having closed somewhere on the way to the end of his little story.

. His nose made its way to Joon’s stomach, nuzzling against the other for a small amount of extra warmth.  He had never realized that he had been clutching at the hem  of Joon’s shirt, nor the fact that he was generally never comfortable enough around other people to fall asleep on them like that. Perhaps he had finally found someone that he just didn’t have to try with. Joon had seen every side of Hongki and yet he had still come to see him and make sure that he was ok. A small smile spread across his face as he fell into a rather deep sleep, a small tear rolling down his cheek. Maybe, for once, he’d have someone who wouldn’t leave him.

[cirque-ren]

Too Soon? || Ren x Hongki

[cirque-ren]

A careful frown grew across his lips as Hongki yanked his hand like that, but where he’d normally find that annoying, his mind flashed back to Minhyun and how angry he had gotten when he tried to touch him. Biting down on his lip, guilt actually welling up in him, he wondered about potential seduction rather than his initial goal. Of course he still wanted to sleep with the leader, but taking it in a route where he didn’t initiate contact first could likely serve him well, frustrating as it might turn out.

“Tea sounds great!” He chirped, slipping past Hongki into the familiar cottage, fond memories of watching this place through the windows coming back to him. Right –that was how he hadn’t bored himself to tears last time they came to the Island. Shaking his head at his past antics, he looked back at the elder curiously, “The light hurts your eyes? Has it always done that?” Ren pondered what life before the Cirque had to have been like for the other if that effect had been there from birth.

Following Hongki obediently into the kitchen, he looked up at the cabinets as he debated on making an innuendo or not. Instead, he got a much, much better idea. “What’s that?” He gestured vaguely to the tea that seemed a bit more out of reach than the rest, though he couldn’t quite tell. “It looks pretty good from here.” Repressing a giggle, Ren knowing he’d get a better view of the elder’s ass no matter whether he reached further back or higher, he set his expression innocently, like he had no ulterior intention about this beyond drinking the flavor of tea that most struck his fancy. God knew he never really drank tea in any other situation.

Crossing his arms across his chest, his gaze roamed over the leader’s bare back, eyes both calculating and hungry as he tried to figure out the best way to charm his way into Hongki’s pants. Maybe by being sweet and by making not-so-subtle suggestions and he could surely make anything look good if food was involved. If only he had some strawberries, but he could work with what he was given…especially when the prize was as nice as that.

[xcirque-hongki]

Hongki tried to ignore the feeling that Ren was devouring him with his eyes, opting for the explanation of him just being super paranoid about things. How could Ren be there for anything more than to just make sure that their leader wasn’t going insane after so many recent losses? Ren pointed at the top shelf of his cabinet with the tea in it and Hongki mentally sighed. He was tall, but not quite tall enough to reach it without help. He stood on his toes and put his knee on the counter to boost himself up just high enough to grab it. He felt his muscles slide under his skin with each of his movements. He realized how tense he really was and tried to relax as he grabbed the box and pulled it down and placed both of his feet back on the floor, totally oblivious to the eyes on his ass.

“It’s probably because I spend most of my time in the shadow. My eyes don’t adjust to light fast and for the first few hours that I’m in the light, it hurts quite a bit. After a while, my eyes adjust... But I just don’t see it being worth it,” He said, shrugging as he put on the teapot.

It didn’t take long for the water to boil and Hongki to make the tea, bringing it over to where the couch area was, placing both cups down on the table before walking back to grab the sugar before heading back to where the couches were and set it down before plopping down on the couch, one leg up on the couch, laying back against the armrest. He was still tired, but he figured he could entertain a guest for long enough and then just sleep again after. “Sorry if I’m not the greatest with conversation, I’m still trying to wake up,” He said, running his fingers through his hair and looking lazily at Ren. His tea was still too hot so he probably wouldn’t drink any of it for a bit.

[cirque-joon]

Forced Distraction | Hongki & Joon.

[cirque-joon]

Catching the smirk on the other’s face, Joon’s smile became a bit more honest, less hesitant. It however momentarily faded when Hongki dropped to his knees as well, casually placing his head on his lap. Swallowing thickly, Joon attempted to keep at bay images of Baek, seeing as he often had wished to simply sit with him this way, and thankfully succeeded for the most part. It however didn’t keep his heart from lurching painfully in his chest, enough for Joon’s next smile to look more like a grimace than anything happy. “Whatever you say, hyung,” he mumbled with a bit of humor, looking up and at the ocean so that Hongki wouldn’t see his features as easily.

Then came words of gratitude, which somehow went straight to Joon’s heart, soothing the wounds scattered over its surface and the renewed ache. In a way, he found it silly that the elder thanked him for things that came naturally to him, but he was truly glad that his actions had helped. “It’s nothing, really…” he replied, tone soft, a light chuckle bubbling past his lips afterwards. “I’ll drag you out at night next time, though.” After all, Joon might have been afraid of the dark, but it didn’t physically pain him the way light hurt the shadow manipulator’s eyes. Surely if he had been aware of that before, he would have been more careful with the time he went to pull the man out of his cabin.

Peering back down at the blond man, he brought a hand up to mindlessly fix some strands of his hair. Movement at first light, Joon then threaded his fingers through the locks, gently combing them as he rested his head against the trunk behind him. His excuse, if asked, would be that Hongki hadn’t had time to fix his hairdo since they had left his cottage so quickly, but truthfully, Joon simply seeked a certain closeness to make up for the loneliness he had been feeling these days, and that without completely realizing it. “So… How’s leading the circus these days?” he asked, pausing in his stroking as he spoke, but resuming it afterwards.

[xcirque-hongki]

Hongki squirmed a bit when Joon called him Hyung, the word sitting weird with him. He opened his eyes as He tried to think back to the last time that someone had used that word, but the only person who came to his mind was Ren. And Ren... “Somehow, Hyung sounds better coming from you than it does from Ren. Ren..” Hongki made a disgusted look but said nothing else, not really wanting to think of the way that the other had advanced on him recently. He shuddered and looked away from Joon. “Don’t go near Ren if you don’t want to be creeped out for the rest of your life,” He advised, wiggling a bit to get more comfortable.

“Ahh, don’t worry about it. I shouldn’t coop myself up so often. Maybe just bring me sunglasses next time. For someone who has such an issue with sun, I keep misplacing mine,” Hongki said, yawning as his fatigue hit him again. He hadn’t been sleeping for long before Joon had woken him up and his normally busy schedule had already left him sleep deprived. He yawned again and stretched out a bit, taking care with each of his muscles so that they didn’t knot up in the process. “Just make sure that they aren’t gaudy,” He said, winking at the other as he tried to lift the mood. He wasn’t so shallow as to notice the pain in Joon’s face even as he tried to hide it.

Hongki’s eyes fluttered back closed as the other ran his fingers through his hair. Normally this kind of closeness would have bugged him, but it reminded him of how he had allowed Hyoyeon to do the same to comfort him on several occasions. A shudder ran up his spine but he hummed softly at the contact, moving his head into Joon’s hand a bit. The gesture was calming. “Stressful, but it’s worth it.” His eyes opened up and he looked up at Joon, eyes serious. “But this place is my home. It’s been my home for most of my life and even though I can’t stand some of the people here, I’d rather it be me punching them instead of someone else. Like annoying siblings, I guess.”

Hongki then closed his eyes again. “Why haven’t we hung out before this? You’re not as annoying as I thought you were, no offense..” He said, realizing what he had said could be seen as rude. He really needed to learn to think before he spoke.

[primabea]

[cirque-joon]

Forced Distraction | Hongki & Joon.

[cirque-joon]

Oblivious to Hongki’s train of thoughts, Joon only was a bit surprised when he seemed to change his opinion on his tan in a matter of seconds. Pleasantly so, however. A subtle flush crept up his neck and cheeks at the flattery, but he his his mild embarrassment with a slightly smug smile. He didn’t comment on anything, aware of the other’s bad mood and not willing to worsen it with some unpleasant remark that would make him seem too full of himself. Thus, he kept his lips sealed and solely chuckled, focusing on the feeling of sand under his feet more than that inflicted by the compliment.

Joon headed towards the ocean, the sound of waves a repetitive yet beautiful melody that pulled him in and seemed to soothe his troubles. Plus, with the sun reflecting on its surface, it shone like a hundred suns, which made the light creator smile broadly despite needing to squint his eyes a bit to protect his retinas. He only slowed down when a second hand gripped onto his arm. Then, he came to a halt and turned his head towards Hongki, worried he had pushed too much and had angered him to a point of no return. He was going to let go of his hand when the sigh reached his ears, but the words following close dissuaded him from doing so. He easily agreed to the condition, humming in answer. “Alright. Uhm, yeah. Let’s sit in the shade…" he mumbled loudly enough, although more for himself than for the other.

He changed directions, heading more to the left than forward now, and kept his pace slow so that he didn’t drag Hongki, now, but simply led the way. They reached a tree that had half of its roots planted deep in the sand, and the other half in soil and grass. Its positioning was somewhat odd, stuck between two types of landscape, beach and forest, but Joon barely let that fact bother him. Instead, he moved Hongki so that his back would point towards the ocean, seeing as Joon had noticed how bright it looked. “There. You can sit, I guess. There shouldn’t be too much light here."

Releasing the elder’s wrist, he smiled a bit hesitantly and dropped to the ground beneath his feet, pressing his back to the tree’s trunk behind him. He dared to hope Hongki’s eyes wouldn’t hurt as much now that they were shielded from the sun’s direct rays, for he really disliked the thought of putting his collegue through pain to sate his need for entertainment. He wasn’t selfish and didn’t want to be considered as selfish. It simply happened that his idea of a distraction and the time he had chosen to distract himself didn’t please Hongki as much as himself, sadly enough. Perhaps they could make a comprimise next time. Well, if there was a next time.

[xcirque-hongki]

Hongki was grateful that Joon didn’t make fun of him for his eyes. It wasn’t something that he put out in the open. It was something that he was embarrassed of, a weakness that other people could exploit and use against him. Joon led him to the shade and the other’s body quickly dropped away. Hongki blinked, squinting his eyes as it adjusted to the shade before realizing that Joon was now sitting on the ground. He put his hands on his hips as he tried to figure out what to do.

Generally Hongki wasn’t the type to like physical contact, but Joon had become one of the rare exceptions. While he wasn’t as close to Joon as he was to Fei or Zelo, he had known the other for a few years and they had been wokring together for a few years. In that time, Joon had used Hongki as an armrest, dragged him somewhere or other by the arm or jumped on him in excitement so many times that Hongki no longer really cared that he did it. In fact, the day that Joon wasn’t all touchy would be the day that Hongki started to worry about him.

Hongki then smirked, dropping to the ground and putting his head in Joon’s lap, closing one eye before looking up at Joon with his one open eye and a smirk on his face. “You woke me up, your punishment is to be my pillow. Get over it,” He said, moving to pull his hood down so that it wasn’t pulling on him. “Thanks... about the whole moving to shadow thing. Unfortunately my eyes don’t adjust to light well. I’m pretty sure that it’s because my ability is to work with shadow,” He said, shrugging and closing his other eye. “And thanks for coming in and rescuing me. I guess I should get out from time to time.”