Meine Virtuellen Welt @xeezhiah - Tumblr Blog

16 August 2018: MPBL - Basilan Steel vs. Pasay Voyagers

A month or so after my baptism of fire in the semi-pro league, I am back at the basketball court not only to cover Pasay Voyagers' game against Basilan Steel but also to test the waters for an upcoming project with Fox Sports.

This time, the game was held at the San Andres Gym where it reminded me of PBL days where I used to watch Toyota Otis-Letran's games. Believe me, may hugot pa rin ako kahit sa game venue pero di ko na babanggitin what is it. Let's just leave it as a memory that it is. 🤣

Moving forward - I was at the venue early because I needed to secure the press pass of my companion, Alyanna. As I have said, we are doing something upcoming for Fox Sports. It's something that I am familiar with as I have done it in college for Kable but as always, out of respect, I won't divulge what is it. 🤐

I have had plenty of time to spare since I won't be able to do what I am asked to do without Alyanna. So while waiting for her, I just sat there and got myself busy with my mobile phone. I find it amazing that Emerson Oreta and Commissioner Kenneth Duremdes had awesome memory because they were able to recognise me even if it was only my second time to cover MPBL.

"Sabi na nga ba magkikita pa tayo ulet!" Says Commissioner Duremdes the moment he saw me sitting at the media table.

I was also able to (finally) meet Jordan Samar, who is one of my colleagues in Fox Sports. He is part of the Basilan Coaching Staff so while our teams are yet to come out and play against each other, we were being friendly first. Don't get me wrong, we weren't exchanging banters as the game buzzer sounded.

"Uy, ikaw ulet! Good to see you back here." Says Emerson when he passed by where Jordan and I were standing.

Nakakatuwa kasi kahit they meet new people every week, narerecall pa rin nila yung mga nakakasama nila sa coverage.

When both teams went out to warm up, feeling ko na naman nasa NCAA ako - why? I've seen familiar faces, I've seen former Letran Knights and it made me proud seeing these boys still doing what they love. Proud all the more because my MPBL Press Pass is held by a Letran lanyard, so it's like nagkalat kaming mga Letranista dun.

Before any reunion with a fellow Letranista though, something happened na sobrang nakakahiya because it happened in front of Commissioner Kenneth - tamaan ng basketball sa ulo. The table where the media has been assigned to kasi, andun sa dulo ng courtside so it really is prone for someone sitting there na matamaan ng bola. Nakaiwas ako sa isa but the second time around, kahit umilag na ko, tinamaan pa ako. It hit me hard sa may batok which lead Commissioner to worry a bit. Mejo masakit, mejo din feeling ko na-shake yung ulo ko ng slight pero it didn't need naman medical attention.

Commissioner then reminded me to keep an eye on the ball and that dapat daw, malayo pa lang, iwasan ko na. I did so coz the next time I saw a ball about to hit me, ayun, sinipa ko ng parang football.

I didn't know who was that Pasay Voyagers player who accidentally hit me with a basketball at the back of my head, kung sino ka man - congratulations kasi nanalo tayo! 🤣 Please wag mo na ulitin yun, ansaket, dude! 😣

While both teams were warming up, one player from Basilan smiled at me and approached me later on - Hafer Mondragon, another former Letran Knight. We had a little chat, akala nya kasi first time ko to cover MPBL so sabi ko pang second na yun. I have not seen Hafer in more than a decade and it's so refreshing to see him again. Para din naman hindi sya nagbago. Nakakatuwa kasi he was one of the Knights na talaga namang nakakausap ko even before I enrolled in Letran.

Too bad that it slipped my mind to take a foto with Hafer, para complete na sana yung reunion mode. But anyway, may next time naman.

If only I could gather all the former Knights earlier and take a foto of them, I would have done it but feeling pressured ako in doing my new assignment even if it is not supposed to be new to me anymore. While I managed to pull it off, there was still a roadblock that kept it from being released as planned - internet connection.

Punyetang internet connection yan! 🙄😥

Okay na sana ee, sumablay lang talaga sa internet.

Alyanna needed a stable connection so I asked sa media room if they do have one. Unfortunately, they can't be able to provide broadband connection so I opted to share my mobile data with her through wifi hotspot - it didn't work. 😔

I was then forced to run to the nearest mall in the area to see if I can buy pocket wifi. I succeeded only that even the pocket wifi can only do so much. Hindi rin nya kinayang i-send sa Fox Sports yung ginagawa namin ni Alyanna so the original plan was foiled.

But I won't give up too soon, the same way my team is not giving up against their opponent.

I told Alyanna that we should stick to the content idea and do what we needed to do. At that part, I am certain we succeeded.

At that thought, how I wish all game venues will provide a sturdy internet connection for the media covering the MBPL.

Tonight's consolation though - finally meeting THE Cedelf Tupas!

He's a pundit for the said game and before airing, we have had time to talk about football pero off the record yun, hindi ko ikukwento napag usapan namin about football, coz it's just about our opinion on some issues. Besides, sabi nga nya, time out daw muna sya sa football.

Cedelf is a personality that I respect and look up to, same way as how I respect Bob Guerrero and Mike Limpag (who I am still hoping I would get to meet real soon) - that being said, papalampasin ko ba naman ito:

I couldn't catch him sa football games hence taking advantage that I have seen him at the MPBL. Oh wait, I still need to send him a Facebook request!

Now here comes my favourite part of the night - having the chance to interview Congresswoman Emi Calixto-Rubiano for Fox Sports, on her birthday. 😍

Unknown to many, Congresswoman is my "nanay-nanayan" since I have been SK Chair in 2002. I've been close to her since then, even gaining her children as my friends. It was a humbling opportunity that I was able to interview her for my job, not just because I want to talk to her or something.

Feeling ko, iniinterview ko nanay ko the moment I was standing beside her. Hindi nya nga ako binitawan the whole time na magkausap kami. I saw happiness in her eyes, seemingly telling me how proud she is of what I am doing. Seryoso, nakaka touch! ❤️

Wala kaming selfie tonight but I am self-proclaimed "resident sportswriter" of the team so there will always be next time.

Of course Pasay winning tonight is a massive source of good vibes - at least hindi naman pala ako jinx. 🤭

Yun nga lang, anhirap to stay neutral. Whatever challenge I experience covering football, watching Ceres-Negros FC, same thing happens with Pasay Voyagers and I am assuming it is also the same thing for the Letran Knights pag nagkaroon ng chance for me to cover one of their games.

I really can't hide my passion even if kelangan.

Well, someone out here needs to really control the outbursts of her emotions in covering games like that.

Masasanay din siguro ako real soon. 😊

❤️

Gaia Bella is coming home...

Trust me when I say it is so difficult to even gather my thoughts together and write again just to say goodbye. Because for me, goodbyes are the most hardest, I hate saying goodbye, be it in any language I know. I just hate it.

Gaia bella would have her last journey tomorrow, her mortal body is going to have her final flight where our Lola Nene, Gaia's teachers, classmates, friends and neighbours are waiting for her. Our little angel is coming home where she will be laid to rest. One last plane ride for our baby girl before she finally lays to rest.

I was at her wake yesterday and today, offered prayers and whispered things that only she can hear wherever she may be. I wrote her a short note before I left her wake and placed it on her casket, beside her fave toys, along with notes coming from my sisters. I kissed her goodbye - something that took a lot of courage to do because goodbyes are always hard to swallow especially for someone whose life has been taken at such a young age.

The past week has taught me a lot of lessons and realisations that Gaia's passing has brought. It takes utmost courage to even compose something, in spite of grief just to get the attention of the local government of Caramoan because of what happened. I only tried to see if my writing would be noticed and I was humbled by the number of people who shared my blog post the moment I published and posted it on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. Humbled even more when one of my college professors, one of my Fox Sports editors and the mainstream media has noticed my blog post - they somehow helped the family to get the attention and the awareness that we all wanted to happen. We are not after filing charges, we just wanted to save another life because we don't want another incident like Gaia's to occur be it in Caramoan or anywhere else in the country.

For the past week, that has been my battlecry, my crusade and the mainstream media heard it. They helped my family and I to voice it out further. In some ways, I wanted to believe that it's Gaia helping us out the moment my messenger got flooded with messages coming from reporters, asking permission if they can use a portion of my blog post and if they can get details from my Aunt herself. It was overwhelming to read comments from strangers who gave their thoughts about how careless the Caramoan LGU is in terms of protecting their tourists. To be honest, Caramoan is one place I personally least expect to lack graphic warnings on their beaches because it has been host to a couple of episodes/seasons of the reality series; Survivor. But Gaia's passing proved me otherwise - I'll keep waiting for their action in silence.

I was glad that mainstream media aired and published Gaia's story, because I have felt that they can pressure Caramoan to do something, more than some digital ambassador of an international sports news firm can.

The past week taught me how to be more patient and calm, because the length and depth of my blog post turned out to be massive - I had to bridge the connection between strangers and my aunt just because they need to get her side and the moment she told us that she's tired, it also taught me how to be more polite in answering to people who kept contacting me to get through her. It's crazy but it was worth it because I have felt I did something right for my cousin. The media's attention to her story is somewhat a vindication for Gaia, because we were able to spread awareness above all.

That's what matters most anyway.

Last night, my Aunt handed us her pasalubong from Italy and didn't really looked at the bag full of goodies until we got home. Seeing the goodies gave a little pinch in my heart - Gaia could have handed these stuff over to us but it was given to us when we were seated facing her casket, inside a funeral chapel. Then I began to be emotional again, thinking it may be a fun treat to have all these stuff especially the bags of Haribo and a jar of Nutella but having Gaia around is incomparable. I would exchange having her alive over those sweet treats but it's too late. If only I could preserve the sweet treats, believe me, I would have done it so that I could remember it was her pasalubong on her final visit to Manila.

Thank you, Gaia bella, not only for the sweet treats but for teaching everyone of us the virtue of patience and acceptance the past week that we have to deal with your untimely passing. Your tragic passing brought awareness that there lives creatures in the sea that can be fatally harmful to us. Your passing taught me all the more the value of extensive researching so that I could write about facts and facts alone. It still is sad and unfortunate to have seen you looking like a barbie doll sleeping in a box over being a living doll that smiles to everyone. Unfortunate all the more that I don't and won't have personal memories to share to the world about you - but I am glad that somehow, the virtual world connected us. Thank you for your yearly birthday video greetings - sure I will miss it this year but I know somehow, I could hear you say "Tanti Auguri, Ate!" at the bottom of my heart. Your youtube videos would keep your memories alive as much as your fotos that depicted how you enjoyed your seven year stay in this lifetime. Grazie, bella bambina. ❤️ You are loved, baby girl. I will forever remember you smiling beautifully like this:

I am sure you're doing that up in heaven while you watch over everyone of us here on earth.

Now this is the point where I would take time to thank people who had been so remarkable in helping my blog post be noticed - Ms. Irene Ocampo-White, who reached out to me to inform me that it got the attention of ABS-CBN and wants to do a story about Gaia and Ms. Veronica Eufracio, my professor in Investigative Journalism who offered a hand in this battle to get the Caramoan government be aware and do something about it.

Also, to Sir Earl Averilla, my editor at Fox Sports and Sir Marc Camasura of Pasay Voyagers for sharing it to their network to help the article reach more people.

To Ms. Mylce Mella and Sir Gerard Lorbes of ABS-CBN Bicol for constantly updating us about the airing and publishing of the story on their website and network and for simply just having the heart to help our voice be heard all the more.

To Sir JP Soriano for helping me to get through GMA News Online and correct the report that they have published on the site.

To Sir Marc Meru of GMA News Online for reaching out to correct the news report.

To everyone who offered their condolences, who shared the blog post to help spread awareness, massive thank you.

To Fr. Vic Calvo, for giving Gaia's final mass and blessing. You really are the family's resident priest as you have never failed to be there for my family whenever you can, be it housewarming, car blessing, baptism or funeral - it only takes a call and you're right there. Many thanks, Papsi. 🙏 Also, thank you for giving me my first communion in 7 years. ❤️

Eternal rest grant unto your soul, Gaia bella. Dormi in pace, amore. Buona notte.

No goodbyes, baby girl, just see you later... 👼

Xy-Zha's Backstory: 28 July 2018 - Meeting my Gaia bella

Truth be told, it wasn't the kind of first meeting that I have imagined I'd have with my little cousin.

I was rather imagining she'll smile at me like this:

That, we will be laughing together. Perhaps teach her how to speak Filipino because she's trying to learn the language.

My Aunt would always tell her how she's like me in some ways - like how she loves to be photographed, how she loves picking sea shells and in some angle, we resemble each other especially on my fotos when I was a kid. I was so excited that I will finally meet her but my Gaia bella made me do something that I love in a manner that would make me cry so much. My Gaia bella made me tell her story to the whole world, in a way that I never even imagined because it is not the kind of story about her that I would love to write about.

Nevertheless, she made me do it, because I feel that she wanted me to be an instrument to save lives. My baby cousin made me do it because she knows I have the voice and perhaps the network to spread awarweness and pave way for some lapses to be rectified.

Yesterday, I have written the hardest blog post I could ever write in my existence - harder than doing a match report of any of the sports team I support that bowed down to their opponent, harder than blogging about missing an opportunity to interview a world class athlete. I had the choice not to do it and just mind about my feelings but then, I've realised that my being a writer would be senseless if I won't be able to do my cousin a huge favour.

If I was able to inspire athletes with my articles, perhaps I could use the same craft to ignite change and save lives. I'm not sure if I can but it won't hurt if I try.

As I post this, the blog I wrote about my Gaia bella is still trending online - at least that's what wordpress is telling me as it continuously receives unimaginable traffic in the internet, from different parts of the globe. I still encourage to share it, until it reaches the area and the people concerned. I can only cry that it's getting that much attention, because it bore out of losing Gaia.

Tonight, we have met for the first time, and this is how I saw her:

Her suffering was evident in her closed eyes and in her covered arms and feet. While it is true that she looked like a Barbie doll, I would rather wanted to see her as the Barbie that's smiling and talking than a Barbie who is boxed and lifeless.

Meeting Gaia and writing her story was the hardest thing that I had to this week as it was so damn hard to set my emotions aside while trying to make sense in what I am writing.

Now, please do me a favour, beyond sharing what is written on my other blog site, where I posted Gaia's story ( http://diaryofafootiefangirl.wordpress.com ), please whisper a prayer for Gaia, for her Mama and Papa, for everyone who loves her. 🙏 Just that and I will be fine.

Danke schön 💔

Sharing my post from my football blog so that I could get more people to read it, be aware and perhaps help me to urge Caramoan to rectify how they protect their tourists.

24 July 2018: My "baptism of fire" in the semi-pro basketball league

Tonight, I once again moved out of my comfort zone and proved that I can be a versatile scribe.

I have to use my little knowledge in basketball, tried remember how I used to cover the Letran Knights in the NCAA and perhaps use what I can recall in this specific ball game. I remember my Kable stint, on how I write for the remarkable happenings per quarter and report it on cam later on - suffice to say, I did practice being the courtside reporter that I have never been. The only difference is, I don't have to face the camera to report each quarter, armed with my mobile phone, I did live tweet updates of the ball game.

Technically, it is my first time doing a live basketball coverage for Fox Sports so it really is brand new to me. It also is my first time doing two games in one day. Those and a few other things comprises my "baptism of fire" in the semi-pro league.

I was stoked, why won't I when I get to spend four hours or so of my life inside the place where I do have shares of fond memories especially during my Official Student Correspondent days for Chalk Magazine and my student days in Letran. I remember NCAA games being played in Cuneta Astrodome, watching a Manny Pacquiao fight in there, too. In fact prior to tonight, that Pacman fight was the last time I have ever been in the venue.

Stoked because the players I have known and had been cheering for back in college were there, suited up for all four teams who are scheduled to play. Stoked all the more that there were personalitiea whom I have only seen on television during the rare times I switch it on pro basketball that fast forward to tonight, I have been introduced and met. Massive bonus was seeing Pacman himself as I was seated about 15 chairs away from him at the jampacked Cuneta Astrodome.

I did not made efforts to walk near the Boxing Champion Senator because his entourage, along with his wife were there. I don't even want to go to the hassle of passing through his securities just to win a selfie. That stolen shot of him shall suffice, for now. My league ID may soon be of great purpose to achieve a courtesy selfie with the athlete Pacquiao.

Then there are moments like this - being at the press room is something I am used to already because spending my Fox Sports duties mostly at the PFL made me feel that the press room is my home. What I am now used to is sharing a meal with the league commissioner who also happens to be one of the country's greatest basketball players.

I can only say surreal.

On the first game, I remember this team from the now-defunct Philippine Basketball League - Toyota Oitis as the player who dominated the scoring for Cebu Sharks used to play for that team - Patrick Cabahug. He still has the same form as how he was way back in 2007. Superb.

Then there was that moment where I have seen a familiar face, sitting at the Cebu bench. I have not seen him in 13 or 12 years but how he looks like is still vivid in my memory. I am not sure if he has seen me but we were seated almost across each other, I don't know either if he still has 20/20 vision and if he can even remember me. What I am certain is that the whole time Cebu and Manila where playing, I feel distracted by his presence.

On to the rather frustrating home game on which I felt as if I was the jinx. I was originally invited by the home team to just watch the game but since Sir Rey is also my boss, I ended up covering in behalf of Fox Sports. But just like each Ceres Negros FC fixture in the PFL that I get to cover, it is very hard to stay neutral knowing that the team of the city I call my home. I shamefully admit to being biased for Pasay Voyagers and was even cheering proudly.

Hopefully I could learn how to get over being biased when I cover the next Pasay Voyagers home game again.

I must say, their game was intense that I was expecting it would go into overtime but my expectation failed the same way as how my home failed to win tonight.

Big consolation for me though is getting this rare chance for a selfie with my fave UST Tiger - Emerson Oreta who is serving as an official in the MPBL.

My fangirl quota has been reached! 🤣

24 July 2018: My "baptism of fire" in the semi-pro basketball league

Tonight, I once again moved out of my comfort zone and proved that I can be a versatile scribe.

I can only say surreal.

Hopefully I could learn how to get over being biased when I cover the next Pasay Voyagers home game again.

I must say, their game was intense that I was expecting it would go into overtime but my expectation failed the same way as how my home failed to win tonight.

Big consolation for me though is getting this rare chance for a selfie with my fave UST Tiger - Emerson Oreta who is serving as an official in the MPBL.

My fangirl quota has been reached! 🤣

24 July 2018: My "baptism of fire" in the semi-pro basketball league

Tonight, I once again moved out of my comfort zone and proved that I can be a versatile scribe.

I have to use my little knowledge in basketball, tried to remember how I used to cover the Letran Knights in the NCAA and perhaps use what I can recall in this specific ball game. I remember my Kable stint, on how I write about the remarkable happenings per quarter and report it on cam later on - suffice to say, I did practice being the courtside reporter that I have never been. The only difference is, I don't have to face the camera to report each quarter, armed with my mobile phone, I did live tweet updates of the ball game.

I was stoked, why won't I when I get to spend four hours or so of my life inside the place where I do have shares of fond memories especially during my Official Student Correspondent days for Chalk Magazine and my student days in Letran? I remember NCAA games being played in Cuneta Astrodome, watching a Manny Pacquiao fight in there, too. In fact prior to tonight, that Pacman fight was the last time I have ever been in the venue.

Stoked because the players I have known and had been cheering for back in college were there, suited up for all four teams who played. Stoked all the more that there were personalities whom I have only seen on television during the rare times I switch it on pro basketball that fast forward to tonight, I have been introduced and met. Massive bonus was seeing Pacman himself as I was seated about 15 chairs away from him at the jampacked Cuneta Astrodome.

I did not make efforts to walk near the Boxing Champion Senator because his entourage, along with his wife were there. I don't even want to go through the hassle of passing his securities just to win a selfie. That stolen shot of him shall suffice, for now. My league ID may soon be of great purpose to achieve a courtesy selfie with the athlete Pacquiao.

Then there are moments like this - being at the press room is something I am used to already because spending my Fox Sports duties mostly at the PFL made me feel that the press room is my home. What I am not used to is sharing a meal with the league commissioner who also happens to be one of the country's greatest basketball players - Captain Marbel himself, Kenneth Duremdes who is so nice and welcoming to a newbie me.

I can only say surreal.

Then there was that moment where I have seen a familiar face, sitting at the Cebu bench. I have not seen him in 13 or 12 years but how he looks like is still vivid in my memory. I am not sure if he has seen me but we were seated almost across each other, I don't know either if he still has 20/20 vision to even notice me on the other side of the court or if he can even remember me. What I am certain is that the whole time Cebu and Manila were playing, I feel distracted by his presence.

Truth be told, I would have wanted to walk up to him after the game, not because I wanna catch up but because I wanna personally thank him for his massive contribution in my life - my being a Letranite. I give credit where the credit is due, I won't be where I am now if, to begin with, there wasn't someone like him who motivated me to go back to school and fulfill my dreams even if it takes baby steps. The moment I saw him, his last word to me when we decided to part ways flashed back to me out of so many memories we have had - "finish school no matter how long it takes." I may have not cried the moment I saw him, in fact I wanna believe I smiled because even from such distance, I have seen my greatest love. In my mind, at those times that I am guilty of stealing glances from him, I was thanking him for his "legacy" in my life's history. Ours may have been a closed chapter but I am eternally grateful that he played a great factor in shaping me to the woman that I am now. Out of respect, I will choose to withhold his name and his identity and would just settle for the facts that I have stated in here.

On to the rather frustrating home game on which I felt as I was the jinx. I was originally invited by the home team to just watch the game but since Sir Rey is also my boss, I ended up covering in behalf of Fox Sports. But just like each Ceres Negros FC fixture in the PFL that I get to cover, it is very hard to stay neutral knowing that the team of the city I call my home is playing. I shamefully admit to being biased for Pasay Voyagers and was even cheering proudly.

Hopefully I could learn how to get over being biased when I cover the next Pasay Voyagers home game again.

I must say, their game was intense that I was expecting it would go into overtime but my expectation failed the same way as how my home team failed to win tonight.

Big consolation for me though is getting this rare chance for a selfie with my fave UST Tiger - Emerson Oreta who is serving as an official in the MPBL. The former USTYJ Cheerleader me sure was so ecstatic the moment I saw the former Growling Tiger enter the press room.

Beyond that, there are those moments as well which the camera fails to capture - just like how Sir Marc introduced me to the Team Consultant of the Pasay Voyagers; Rich Alvarez. I was able to interview him, even had brief college ball reminiscing. Good thing there is that my boss gave Pasay Voyagers to me as my beat so I get to see the former UAAP star in the home games and in the games in the neighbouring cities like Manila, Makati and even Parañaque.

My fangirl heart has surely reached its quota! 🤣

18 July 2018: Crashing the POC Deputy Secretary-General’s Office

I’d like first to thank the weather for cooperating with my prayers as I would really like to push through with this mission for today. The prayers were worth it because flood subsided just in time for me to leave the house and meet up with my subject in her office.

Yes, today’s subject is a woman - and not just your ordinary woman. I spent two hours or so, chatting with her over puto-kutsinta and Philippine sports.

As always, with all due respect to the article that I am to write about her, her role and ambition for Philippine sports, I will not divulge it here. Besides, I have yet to transcribe her sound bites so there is no way I that I could give a hint about what we have talked about in that two hours, in the comfort of her office inside the Ultra Complex in Pasig.

Again, I have the weather to be thankful for because meeting her did finally happen. It was supposed to be last week but for some unforeseen circumstance, I had to cancel, thus praying that I would not cancel the second time around. My mom did suggest it since it was raining cats and dogs early this morning but I was hopeful that I will be able to do what I need to do today without battling heavy rain as if there is no tomorrow.

I looked at my subject as a VIP so in spite the risk of another heavy downpour, I decided to dress up, take my three-inched black shoes out of the box because it goes better with the dress that I picked and then put a little make up on - the red lipstick (combination of LA Girl’s Matte Red and Burt’s Bee’s Scarlet Red Satin finish lipstick) to complete the look.

“When you’re meeting a VIP, make sure you look good even if you feel better sans the make up.” I told myself.

Besides, that’s being professional as well. It also served as a practice and a challenge since I have decided to put on make up at the time where the Grab Car I booked is outside the house already - it compelled me to continue putting on make up inside a moving vehicle which was tough but then, it worked its wonders on me.

Nostalgia kicked in the moment I passed through the gate of the Philsports Complex - the compound is home to a track oval that is most known for runners and triathletes in training; this is the place where I first ran. Ultra is the place where #xyzhaunstoppable was born/created by Coach Jong on the evening of 16 January 2016. My first 651 metres as a runner happened there - it was my first and last time in the area and going back there for a different purpose two years later brought back how I started running.

I wanna actually curse myself for wearing three-inched heels instead of my ever dependable gladiator sandals the moment I walked along the uphill/downhill part of the complex - that was the same area I complained about when Coach Jong made me run for the first time. Yes, I may be complaining anew on a different thing but I survived it again.

“Gaga ka, ginusto mo mag heels ee, pwes, panindigan mo yan!” I said to myself as I keep on walking my way to the building where the POC Office is located.

For a while, it seemed as if I was seeing myself from two years ago, running in that area, trying to catch my breath because I was already tired - who wouldn’t when it is uphill and downhill, right? It felt as if I’m hearing Coach Jong telling me the importance of running and how it can help me with my battle with PCOS - the part of which I wanna tell my old self that I am glad that I have made the right choice.

Arriving at the POC office, I am amazed that I was already expected and that I was immediately ushered into the office of Deputy Secretary-General Karen Caballero; the one whom Major Ramil Ranario suggested to me that I should write a story next. If our 2-hour conversation isn’t fair enough for me to come up with a justifiable article about her for Fox Sports, then I don’t know what else would. For a fact, out of all the face to face interviews that I have done, hers was the longest one because there is so much about sports that requires attention, there’s so much to talk about sports, and we could go on and on and on and on.

It is true when they say that no one understands a woman better than another woman, I will really vouch for that. On talking to her beyond sports, I have found myself relating to her experiences and vice versa - there sure is a purpose in there, the same way that meeting her has a reason. Perhaps one of the many reasons is being a tool to make a difference - be it in sports or in things beyond sports. I was glad that she also has a big heart for charity, this woman loves to help and give back - the same virtue that my mom is teaching my sisters and I.

“Hang on to your dream and continue to dream big.”

That’s one thing she said that really made a mark on me. Yes, I might be living the dream now but this is just the tip of the iceberg. There’s so much more to explore, so much to learn and discover and that my gift of writing is a powerful tool that I can really use not only to show the world what I can do but also prove that I’m not just limited to covering football games or being a fangirl.

Another fun part in meeting Ms. Karen is when she complimented my lipstick - a proof that even the toughest of the tough still has her soft side. At the end of the day, no matter how feisty or fierce, Ms. Karen can get, she’s still a woman. After our two-hour chat, she gave me a brief tour of the POC office, saw some remarkable stuff that I can’t even imagine seeing - keepsakes of the past Olympic games to be exact, too bad I was too enticed to take fotos of it. She was also kind enough to show me the POC war room and the office of the Commissioner (he’s not in there but it would have been awesome if I was able to meet him, too!)

Talking to her today is just the start of something more, something life changing for me, maybe. I’m too excited to transcribe the sound bytes and share her story with the rest of the world. I’m honoured and grateful that she entrusted me her story. I can’t wait for young girls who wants to be involved into sports to read Ms. Karen’s story.

Special shoutout again to Major Ramil Ranario - Sir, if it wasn’t for your trust, I won’t be sitting down with Ms. Karen today so thank you so much!

True enough, good things happen to good people.

Dear Aspiring Cabin Crew

Just like you, I once tried to fulfill my dream of earning my wings but I was meant to be someone else. I would forever love airplanes and flying hence writing this one for you, yes, you - because I care about you and I want you to get the right information with regards to open days, hiring airlines and other career in aviation. There are a lot online, ranging from the official pages of the airlines to former and current cabin crew's pages even down to agencies and support groups that fellow aspirants established.

Be vigilant. Be observant, my dear aspirant cabin crew because not everything you see online is 100% credible.

There are some who would take advantage of your lack of knowledge about what you are getting yourself into, there are some who would even pretend to help you but they won't and then there are some who would say they are helping but they have little to no experience being at the industry at all.

Don't be fooled by these.

There are those who truly are credible and really helpful in making your cabin crew journey a reality. Never settle for support groups who appear to be helpful but will later on remove you just because you opted to air out your two cents about a certain topic. That's not how life is supposed to be - regardless of it being a negative or a positive opinion, if it will help you become a better version of you and if it will make you a notch closer to your goal, then take it as it is. Please don't settle for some group chat, page or individual who would not help you grow because they don't know nor understand how the industry works.

I care about you a little too much to suggest these pages/individuals to you for your reference should you need resource persons that can inspire you in your cabin crew journey like mine even so I have given up on it. Yours can still come true so take note of these names:

Miss Kaykrizz / Ruth Ramos

Mayie Carballo

Epitome of a Frequent Flyer

Cabin Crew Hub PH

Crew of Choice

IPAMS

Flyhigh Manila

Leonides Peña

Joselito Las

These are just some of the most trusted pages and individuals that I can suggest for you. They are most helpful, they fact check their posts and above all, they know the ins and outs of the aviation industry and won't just give you "facts" based on experience in applying. It will make big difference if you would learn from those who are/were in the aviation industry over those who only had applied since the beginning of inifity.

Be clever, my dearest aspirant. Never settle.

I wish you luck and I hope you would get to earn your wings sooner than you thought.

❤️

Fellow dreamer like you

I can't really put into words how special this run is for me. Running in an airport runway was just a dream until it finally capitalised earlier. Shoutout to Coach Seannah Swift and Coach Rai Cabanig of Swift and Fit MOA for helping me prepare for this (even if I only attended one session) Also to Sir Marc of Pasay Voyagers who was cheering me on messenger the whole time I was waiting for gunstart To my friends who once thought this runway thing was a crazy idea - I TOLD YOU SO! Hahahahaha 😁 To God for blessing us with good weather in spite the threat of a storm and for blessing me with strength to start and finish the run without getting myself injured. It is my faith that kept me thinking I can always win over my weak heart. 🙏 To the airplanes who kept me enticed the whole time - I really wished I was able to take you all home, but I don't have a hangar. Can all of you at least shrink so that my fleet of diecasts can be updated? ✈️ Finally, to the organisers - MIAA - YOU GUYS ROCK! 👍 Not only you have awesome sponsors, but the event was truly a heck of an experience. Massive thanks to opening your gates to runners and allow us to experience how it is like to run at the runway. The price we signed up for it is worth it even at the absence of a finisher's medal because we are able to help children; that's all that matters ❤️ The water cannon gunstart sure is my fave coz I felt like an airplane - that is such a witty way of sending your runners off 😉 MNL Midnight Run may not happen again and I'm proud to be one of the thousands who signed up for the event. Not only I get to run, I also get to see airplanes - that's two things I love and was able to hit both at the same time. ❤️

There is so much to be thankful for

Today/Tonight, I'll take time appreciating the people around me, the things that I do have and the things that makes me whole.

Four months on and I am still thankful that at one point in my life, one of my ultimate dreams has unfolded right before my very eyes. Fox Sports Asia/Philippines believing in what I can do is massive. I don't believe in the word "forever" because that is so damn overrated but yes, I will try and use that word now - because I can't think of a better word than that when I mean saying that I am forever grateful to all the editors and big bosses that I have worked with the past four months. It's been a hell of a ride!

Thank you Kapil, our Singapore head for the trust which to be honest, I still think is surreal. If only fairy godfathers do exist, you're that one. Even if most of the time, you'd tell me that you don't wanna talk to me because I talk too much, I appreciate the friendship that the love for sports has brought. Please schedule your Manila trip real quick and I will be more than willing to be your tour guide sans the attempt to eat balut, okay? That is scary.

Thank you, Sir Raymond Olgado, because it is you who opened the opportunity for me to be where I am now. Had it not for your email response, I may still be a writer wannabe, dreaming that someday I may be allowed to become an investigative journalist. I will always look at you as the fairy godfather's right-hand man in helping me make my dream come true a reality. Above all, thank you for paving the way for my comeback run - you don't have an idea how much it meant for me to be considered as the team's representative in the NatGeo Run. It was fun to do that story/VLOG and without you and Sir James making effort to get the free kit for me, I would not have done that.

Thank you, Sir Earl Averilla, for letting me experience over the top football events either from the comfort of the media tribune or in venues that I can only wish being at. You opened the door for me to consider the names I was once just looking up to and dreaming they would recognise me not as a fan but as their colleague. It is you who paved way for me to hand shake with the likes of the media officers of each of the PFL Teams, know some of the big names in PH football scene, interact with Bob Guerrero for football fun facts and other sports stuff, be taught by Ivan Gayares how to determine who the man of the match is, be recognised by Mike Limpag, Cesca Litton and Martin Steuble for my fearless, bold and unconventional way of writing. Thank you for being so ever patient in explaining football jargons and for correcting my lapses in live match reporting.

Thank you, Sir Rey Joble, for the confidence in giving me stories that I can only imagine writing. Thank you for allowing me to pay tribute to where I come from - Colegio de San Juan de Letran, through basketball related articles which are somehow, out of my personal experience as a very proud Letranista. I am most grateful for your reminders that I should not sound so biased for each Letran-related article since I admit having the tendency to do that because I love my Alma Mater that much. Thank you for taking time checking out on me once in a while, talking about things that strays away from sports but more of life in general. I appreciate the fatherly advises you give, it is so genuine of you to do that.

Thank you, Eros, Kriel, Jonas and the rest of Fox Sports Philippines team for all the help you have extended to me the past four months. I hope you guys won't hesitate to keep doing the same in the coming months.

Thank you, Daniel, our Lead Digital Ambassador for all of our collab works which was fun, especially the world cup stuff because it is there that I have realised I can somehow be a comedian by poking fun at myself for all of my errors. Come up here in Manila, soon and let's scour the streets for more vox pops.

To all those have entrusted me their stories; massive thanks! Apologies that some have yet to be found online but sooner or later, I am sure it will be up. I will always stand loud and proud to say I am honoured for each interview I had made:

Coach Thomas Dooley; Coach Chris Greatwich; Kevin Ingreso; Mike and Manuel Ott; Pat Deyto; Phil & James Younghusband; Jeff Christiaens; Patrick Reichelt; Amani Aguinaldo; Jerry Barbaso; Eduard Sacapaño; Iain Ramsay; Michael Falkesgaard; Simone Rota; Dennis Villanueva; OJ Porteria; Anton del Rosario; Daisuke Sato and Neil Etheridge for Football

Coach Andrea Arcega; Deanne Moncada and Natassha Po for Spartan Racing

Coach Seannah Swift; Larry Ronquillo; Eika Barcelona; Capt. Josepheus Lopez and Maj. Ramil Ranario for Running/Multisports

Atty. Percival Flores; Sir Ed Felix; Jonathan Aldave and the whole Pasay Voyagers team - from Head Coach Cholo Martin, the Assistant Coaches, Players - my fellow Letranite JP Belencion and his wife Nikki for helping me get training details, Managers Sir Marc and Sir Paul, down to the very kind owners Sir Miki and Ms. Le-Anne Rubiano for Basketball

Fr. Soysi Cellan for Cycling.

Thank you to all of you for taking time out of your schedules to spare me a minute, hour and a day in order to give my story, be it video or an article some substance.

To the athletes whom I have written about in my other feature articles, wherein some are those I have grown up rooting for in athletic meets, it also is an honour that I was given the chance to write about all of you and how you all made efforts in shaping Philippine sports. Rest assured that my colleagues and I will never get tired of recognising all of your efforts for the pride and glory of the flag and its people.

Thank you, Coach Marielle Benitez; Martin Steuble; Mary Joy Tabal and Claire Adorna, not only for the Instagram follow back but mostly for recognising my craft. You all made me feel that I am doing my job right no matter how much I struggle in making myself believe that I did a good one. I find inspiration and motivation to keep doing what I am doing from all the good words you have said about me. For that and for sharing my articles, thank you. I hope I could be given the chance to personally thank you for such appreciation.

For the record, it still is on my bucketlist to interview Stephan Schröck and Omid David Nazari - biased aside, of course, as these two remains my faves in spite me being missing in action from the football scene for the past month. It was a personal choice as I wanted to prove my versatility and I want to think I am living up to that goal.

How can I ever forget the members of Ultras Filipinas whom I have built awesome friendship with? Kent Garcia and David Abella, you two, among the others are the ones I get to talk to often, making me understand the ultras culture more. Thank you for trusting me with your rants and raves each time you the two of you drops a sentence or two on my Messenger. Even in things beyond football, you showed genuine friendship to me to which I am grateful.

To the people I have met in the football pitch from 2011 to present, you are too many to mention but I am as grateful as ever to have found friends in you. Allow me to stand one name out among the rest - Charles Danforth Cusi Pettys, who, in spite the distance had been so helpful. If it wasn't for his story that I have written and uploaded on my other blog, Xy-Zha of Fox Sports wouldn't have surfaced.

To my professors in Letran who taught me what I know now, my first mentor - Jane Kingsu-Cheng, my Senate internship boss - Sir Sammy Santos, my friends, my family and everyone else in between who has shown me genuine love and support, I am grateful to infinity and beyond.

To Iyah Estacio, who recently proved me that true friends would be there in times you least expect. You've done a massive favour which I am eternally grateful.

To my best friend, Joanna Marie Malayaon, you are my epitome of infinity and beyond. I may not be opening up some things to you but that's because I know you know that I will be fine. I can do this, love! We've known each other that long for you to know that if I choose not to talk about something that hurts, it is because I can go through it on my own, regardless of how long it will take. I love you, I miss you, please be home soon!

In four months being a Digital Ambassador, I've been called awesome and crazy, I've been appreciated as much as I've been hated. Worst, been called a psycho even. But hey, this psycho did so much in four months, eh? This psycho did well enough to leave a legacy once I decide to leave Fox Sports.

It has been a good ride the past four months, I've had extreme happiness and meltdowns, even questionned myself why am I here for - but each time I do so, there will always be something to remind me of my purpose. That somehow, I do have a voice and a power to create or help create difference. For that and above all, for the talent that I am blessed with, I will be grateful and forever thankful to God and give him back all the glory. My success meant nothing if I don't know how to give thanks and give back.

If I may take time to do so, I would confess a bit - I have written this with a broken heart. I just lost that someone who I thought was the love of my life, someone who I thought was the real answer to the seven-year wait but I will choose not to divulge anything beyond that to protect how I feel, what he might feel, and to respect the person whom I still love very much inspite and despite this painful chapter in my existence. I will choose to remember happy memories no matter how few and short-lived it was.

From here on, there'll be less social media activity for me except when I work for Fox Sports coz it is a given that I am going to flood. I will be fine but I will opt to healing, to pick myself up from yet another setback and focus on my job.

Perhaps I would also use up my silence to find reasons to make waking up every morning worth it, and find ways on how to believe that I deserve love again because since this afternoon, I don't think I do have those.

🙂

28 June 2018: Online interview with the pilgrim cyclist and some lovely surprise on the side

Having the chance to interview Fr. Soysi Cellan was a blessing because his cousin, Fr. Cris Cellan is a family friend. It was Fr. Cris who suggested I do a story about him and I gave it a go.

I always wanted to feature unconventional stories - things that strays away from the usual sports story we read online. It's not everyday that Fox Sports feature cycling hence having the confidence to push with the story. Talking to Fr. Soysi was both inspiring and motivating, thinking that if a priest can make time to keep himself fit, then so can I.

With his story being published, I look forward that more readers would be inspired by his story.

On to the lovely surprise - I don't know what have I done to deserve such overwhelming appreciation. A few days back, I have interviewed Major Ranario for a feature and the next thing I knew, he is endorsing me to another personality that I can write a story about. In the meantime, I would not reveal who she is to keep the element of surprise up until I have formally interviewed her. Personally meeting her would have to wait up until the week after next.

Last night, I was able to talk to her through phone and from there on, it's safe to say that my life and my career as a writer would change. Massive projects and more exciting stories coming ahead - all because this angel came along and spoke to me for about 7 minutes.

For that, I owe Major Ranario a lot because of that endrosement. He did not only trusted his own story to me, he also shared how I can be a voice for others through my craft. That just gave me more reasons to say that I have been so blessed with a gift on which others can truly benefit. No words can express how grateful I am for the opportunity and for the people around me who are so helpful and supportive in making my dreams come to life.

❤️

26 June 2018: Online interview with the real-life Ironman

Of course, it's not Tony Stark! 🤭

Kidding aside, it always a pleasure to have the chance to meet new people and listen to their stories then write about it. I've had the chance to chat with someone who is so busy but took time out to answer my questions.

I say a real-life Ironman because he's the first ever full ironman finisher coming from the Armed Forces of the Philippines. He sure is proud of that feat.

Shall I consider it a blessing in disguise on how I was able to come across him? I say so because it is he who approached me first and asked me to take a look at his own journey to sports and fitness. He came in at the time where Fox Sports published ny article about his comrade in the Air Force. Who am I to decline? So I pitched it in and got a go signal from one of the editors to do the story and draft it.

However, I cannot of course assure it will be published right on, hence I post back stories so anyone reading this one could have a hint on what the story is about.

Major Ranario's feat is as inspiring as that of the other athletes that I have written about. I would refuse to compare him to Capt. Lopez because their choice of sport is different. I'd rather say Capt. Lopez can be a future protege of Major Ranario in the Ironman level since the former is considering joining the said prestigious triathlon event as well. They could even team up for a relay if they wish to.

I wanna believe I scored a big story right here. Big in a sense that he's the first from the military who did the ironman and finished it. Plus, he's an officer awaiting for promotion while he serves for the Department of National Defense.

We opted to go for online interview because our ends won't meet. Of course I would have to adjust so I suggested facebook chat right on. I'm glad he didn't mind but right after, he looks forward to us meeting personally.

❤️

Pinaglaruan ng panahon at pagkakataon

Yung title ng post na to, yan yung nararamdaman ko ngayon.

Sabi ko dati, ayaw ko na mag sulat ng tungkol sa kanya kasi masyadong masakit pero di ko maiwasan. October 2017 ata kami last nag usap, ewan, di ko na matandaan. Basta ang alam ko, January 2018, inalis na nya ko sa buhay nya. Ayaw na nya ako mag exist so sinubukan ko na mag move on. Iniyak ko rin ng halos isang linggo yun ah. Pano ba naman, pwede naman magsabi ng "ayaw na kita, goodbye" pero wala syang sinabi. Basta na lang nya ako inalis ng walang warning.

Okay fine.

Ganun talaga, pag ayaw, wag pilitin.

Pero nasaktan ako.

Eto na nga, feeling ko nga okay na ko. Tingin ko, naka move on na ko. Sabi ko pa nga, wala na ko pakialam kung makikita ko sya kapag lumipad ako kung saan ee. Sabi ko, hindi ako matatakot, wala akong mararamdaman. Pero pag andun ka pala sa situation na yun, iba rin pala mangyayari lalo na pag caught up by surprise ka.

Ganun yung nangyari kanina.

Aware ako na anytime pwede kami magkita lalo na pag nasa condo ako kasi halos kapitbahay ko sya. Pero hindi ko sya dun nakita. Nakasakay ako sa grab car, pauwi ako galing sa condo kasi nagbayad ako ng association dues na pagkamahal mahal. Biglang paglingon ko sa gawing kaliwa, nakita ko sya. Naka uniform pa - natupad din sa wakas yung pangarap kong makita sya na naka uniform. Hindi ako magkakamali na sya yun kasi kahit conduction number ng kotse nya memorised ko pa din. Kahit yung kulay saka yung model, syang sya yun.

Ang bilis ng tibok ng puso ko ee. Buti na lang di nya ko nakita at ako lang ang nakakita sa kanya. Pero may kurot sa puso nun nakita ko sya.

Wala syang pinagbago, ang guapo pa rin nya.

Headturner pa din dating nya saken ee.

Para kong nabuhusan ng yelo nun nakita ko sya na tanging naibulong ko habang stuck sa traffic ee yung pangalan nya. Iba pa rin talaga nun nakita ko sya.

May sakit.

May hapdi

Andun pa din yung tanong na "bakit kelangan ako ma-evict sa buhay mo? Anong ginawa ko?"

Umusad yung sasakyan nya kasabay ng pag usad ng sasakyan kung nasaan ako. Etong panahon at pagkakataon, sajang mapaglaro. Hindi ko inaasahan na dun ko sya masisilayan kahit sandaling sandali lang. Pero yung effect mejo may hangover.

Yun nga lang, sana wag nang uulitin ng tadhana yun.

Hindi masaya. Nakakakaba.

Ayoko na sya maalala ulet pagtapos neto. Gusto ko na ulet mag move on kaya wag na uulitin yun ha? Ayoko syang makita - baka bumalik yung mga memories pati feelings na hindi na dapat ibalik pa.

Baka maalala ko na naman kung gano ko katanga nun lalo na pagdating sa kanya na isang taon kong ginawa.

Wag ganun...

Some unexpected things

I got my first hate comment and criticism to start my day but I wanna think I am still ending it on a good note.

I don't mind taking criticisms in, they're healthy regardless of the manner it is thrown at me. Someone taught me how to handle criticisms well from way back my college days and I am thankful for that.

I'm sure there is more to come as I continue writing. Just two words:

Game on.

I'm closing my day positively because I have found a new friend. It came as a surprise - she approached me on Instagram, thanking me for something that I have done. I mean, it's not so much but she's so proud and grateful for it. I spent the next few minutes talking to her because she's such a joy to have a conversation with. Completely different from what I have encountered this morning.

For her to take time and message me just to say nothing but good words even if she has yet to meet me is something to me. At least this time, I am not being judged. That alone is enough for me to say how much of a sweetheart she is. A dose of good vibes even.

I'm sincerely grateful.

Today is a proof that no matter what life throws at you, there will always be a reason to smile. No matter how many people would hate me for my flaws and with the way I write, there would be some who would choose to believe and appreciate me.

That's one of the many reasons to smile.

My heart is full (again)

❤️

Liebe Schöner

Let this be the first and last time I will write directly to you on my virtual world. After this, like the ones from way, way back, I will keep all the hurt to myself.

I'm sorry I have failed you.

I say so because all the while I thought I could just "escape" some important detail that I have seen somewhere but it's getting into me. It still is making me sad.

It makes me feel unworthy. Unworthy of you. Unworthy of myself.

How can this feeling go away? Please help me find a way.

Euer Fürstin

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