please don't forget to support the amazing writers behind them!
part one
4-7-8 | series | married couple, husband!jk, angst, jealousy, first love, marriage issues, miscommunication, yearning, hurt/comfort
you’re secure when it comes to loving jungkook, knowing that your husband loves you beyond words. what you aren’t so secure about is his first love — someone who isn’t you.
eveything in you | f2l, roommates au, pregnant!reader, ex!bf jimin, smut (mdi)
you want a baby and Jungkook is willing to help.
depend on me | hybrid au, friends to lovers, roommates au, oblivious!jk, overprotective!jk, smut (mdi)
you’re so used to letting Jungkook do everything for you. he babies you almost and you’re both constantly reminded of the strangeness in your friendship. you’ve always loved him but he can’t see you as anything but the little bunny girl he used to protect. you change his mind
long way home | single dad jk, boxer!jk, friends to lovers, angst! | one of my favorites!!
jungkook's life makes an 180 degree turn when he's suddenly a single dad and while you're trying to help him come accustomed to the new circumstances, your long-standing friendship takes new turns as well.
cornflower blue | established relationship, fluff & smut, soft!dom jk, praise, fingering, dirty talk, creampie | mdi !!
nights were your favorite time with your boyfriend. the nights where you laid in bed together, tangled up in each other without any thoughts of the real world.
cry for me | husband!jk, fluff & smut, soft!dom jk, dacryphilia, overstimulation, praise kink, oral, fingering, creampie, cockwarming, smut (mdi)
lazy sunday mornings with your husband always end the same way: jungkook taking care of you, praising you through every tear and reminding you how much he loves you.
after a long night taking care of your baby, your husband notices how exhausted you are and makes it his mission to help you relax, reminding you how loved and appreciated you are.
home | fwb to lovers, hurt/comfort, depressed!reader, green flag!jk, lovesick!jk, confessions, fluff & smut (mdi)
after disappearing for a week and shutting everyone out, you end up at jungkook’s apartment. what starts as comfort between friends with benefits turns into long-overdue confessions, reassurance, and a love neither of you can hide anymore.
timing | series | exes to lovers, second chance, parent au, ceo!jk, angst, fluff, smut (mdi), slow burn, emotional growth, family, happy ending.
after years of loving each other at the wrong moments, you and jungkook keep finding your way back together. through heartbreak, missed chances, growing pains, and unexpected twists, you're forced to ask yourselves one question: if you're meant for each other, was it ever about love—or simply about timing?
shatter with me | mini-series | surrogacy au, model!jk, best friend's husband, forbidden love, pregnancy, infidelity, divorce, heavy angst, slow burn, smut (mdi)
when you agree to become a surrogate for your best friend and her husband, you think you're helping them build the family they've always dreamed of. but as buried secrets come to light and their marriage begins to crumble, you're forced to confront feelings that should have never existed in the first place.
coquet | series | escort!jk, fake dating au, strangers to lovers, wedding au, jealous ex, family drama, angst, fluff, smut (mdi) | this is one of my favorites 4everrrrrr
when you're forced to attend your brother's wedding alongside an ex you never truly got over, hiring an escort seems like the perfect solution. what begins as a simple arrangement soon becomes something much more complicated when jungkook starts feeling less like a stranger and more like someone you never want to let go of.
will it fit? | roommate au, roommate!jk, idiots to lovers, mutual pining, size kink, soft!dom jk, comedy, fluff, smut (mdi), confession
after your roommate catches you in a series of increasingly embarrassing situations, a conversation about a certain dildo spirals into confessions, unresolved tension, and the realization that you've both been crushing on each other for much longer than either of you thought.
under the blankets | boyfriend!jk, established relationship, tattooed couple, body worship, teasing, overstimulation, rough sex, aftercare, fluff & smut (mdi)
what starts as a quiet morning spent admiring each other's tattoos quickly turns into a heated reminder of just how obsessed you and jungkook are with one another.
daddy issues | older!jk, best friend's dad, age gap, forbidden romance, accidental pregnancy, daddy kink, praise kink, possessive!jk, smut (mdi)
what starts as an innocent crush on your best friend's father quickly spirals into a secret relationship built on desire, validation, and blurred boundaries—until one unexpected pregnancy changes everything.
before you | tattoo artist!jk, friends to lovers, accidental pregnancy, fake parenthood, found family, protective!jk, angst, fluff, smut, happy ending (mdi)
jungkook has taken a huge place in your life after he tattooed you, and you can’t even picture how life was before him. he has always been there for you since day one. but how will things change after you find out you’re pregnant?
a hero's journey | editor!reader, best friend's boyfriend au, missed timing, lost confession, friends to lovers, pining, workplace au, angst with happy ending, smut (mdi)
jungkook and jisoo are the mightiest power couple. however, one drunken confession and that whole facade fades in an instant. you realize that maybe you need to break from your unvaried life for a bit and be the hero of your own love story.
when worlds collide | series | college au, ballet!reader, fuckboy!jk, tutoring au, strangers to lovers, opposites attract, angst, slice of life, smut (mdi) | not complete
since your mother's passing, life has been a whirlwind. balancing ballet and college while keeping a low profile was your norm—until jungkook stepped into your world. despite his reputation and popularity on campus, he keeps insisting on your help, pulling you into the spotlight you've always tried to avoid.
home | drabble | idol!jk, military au, established relationship, bam, reunion, domestic fluff, long distance, military enlistment, light angst
since jungkook's enlistment, you've grown used to missing him in the little moments—especially when bam waits by the door for someone who isn't supposed to come home yet. but one ordinary evening turns into the perfect surprise when the person you've been longing for suddenly appears on the other side of the door.
first position | college au, established relationship, best friend x reader x jk, threesome, friends helping friends, comedy, smut (mdi), alcohol, marijuana use | one of the filthiest smuts ever
your best friend's ex might have broken her heart, but the fact that he never managed to make her orgasm is somehow even worse. determined to show her what she's been missing, you and jungkook decide to take matters into your own hands.
burning hour | idol!jk, established relationship, yacht date, summer vibes, playful banter, fluff, smut (mdi) | rich boyfriend jk living his best yacht owner life
there's nothing better than spending a relaxing day on your boyfriend's yacht, soaking up the sun and waiting for the sunset. unfortunately for you, jungkook has other plans—and they involve making sure you pay attention to him instead.
▻ Shatter With Me
↳ Model!Jungkook x Surrogate!f.Reader
⤜ Surrogacy AU
⤜ Best Friend’s Husband | smut, fluff, heavy angst
⤜ Rating: MA
⤜ WC: ~46,420 (ongoing)
⤜ Summary: Your best friend, Jiyoon, and her husband, Jungkook, have faced years of hardship trying to start a family. In a last-ditch effort to have their dream life, they seek solace in surrogacy. Wanting to see your best friend smile, you offer to become the bright beacon at the end of the tunnel, giving them what they have always wanted. But what happens when you begin to shine your light on their darkness? Things aren’t always as they seem—happiness can be a façade, shattering under the lightest pressure.
⚠️ Crass language, talk of infertility, drinking, very mild bullying and references to cruel behavior/words, talk of surrogacy, at-home medical procedure, genital touching (non-sexual), planned pregnancy, talk of pregnancy termination/abortion, BIG hurt feelings, open palm slapping, accusations of infidelity, rejected/unwanted drunken kissing that could be viewed as dubious infidelity, lies/deceit about fertility, broken marriage, infidelity, talk of divorce/filing for divorce, legal separation, kissing, fingering, cunnilingus, mild dirty talk, mild begging, sex while pregnant, creampie
Each chapter will have specific warnings listed as they're posted.
tropes: single dad jk, boxer!jk, friends to lovers, !angst!
word count: 49.5k (+ drabbles)
summary: jungkook's life makes an 180 degree turn when he's suddenly a single dad and while you're trying to help him come accustomed to the new circumstances, your long-standing friendship takes new turns as well.
*✭˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ*✭˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ**✭˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ*✭˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ*
part 01: cockblock
the one where you babysit jungkook's baby and somehow let the night end up with being a cockblock for him.
part 02: promises
the one where jungkook breaks his promise for the first time.
part 03: drunken confessions
the one where you had a little too much to drink and, oops, your lips are pressed against someone else's.
part 04: oh, you mean the babysitter?
the one where jungkook fucks up.
part 05: girlfriends and boyfriends flashback_01_
the one where you think calling jungkook will make you stop missing him but it actually worsens the ache in your heart.
part 06: apologies and excuses
the one where jungkook tries to apologise for his behaviour.
part 07: first time
the one where jungkook has to deal with your rejection for the first time.
part 08: the night i lost hope flashback_02_
the one where you're drunk and ask jungkook a question and he unknowingly crushes all your hopes with his answer.
part 09: birthday surprise(s)
the one where jungkook wants to surprise you on your birthday but then he gets surprised with a half naked jimin in your apartment.
part 10: best friends
the one where you're reminded why you love jungkook so much.
part 11: needing him flashback_03_
the one where you're absolutely broken and there's only jungkook you need.
part 12: weird behaviour
the one where jungkook is acting weird but you can't tell why.
part 13: little bear
the one where you miss nabi.
part 14: needing her flashback_04_
the one where jungkook is absolutely helpless and there's only you he needs.
part 15: concerned granny
the one where even the grannies in the coffee shop start missing jungkook.
part 16: unwanted guests
the one where jungkook proves to you that he's always there for you when you need him.
part 17: betrayal
the one where you're not enough for jungkook.
part 18: stolen kisses flashback_05_
the one where your foolish heart thinks it'd be a fun idea to kiss jungkook at a party.
part 19: double chocolate cookies
the one where traditions are broken.
part 20: pillowtalk
the one where you realise that talking to jimin helps you to mend the broken pieces of your heart.
part 21: new beginnings flashback_06_
the one where jungkook gives up.
part 22: oopsies & ouchies
the one where jungkook can't control his jealousy.
part 23: three words
the one where jungkook explains himself.
part 24: star-crossed
the one where jungkook regrets everything.
part 25: just friends flashback_07_
the one where jungkook isn't enough for you.
part 26: long way home
the one where decisions are made.
⛧ ⌒ ⛦ ⌒ ⛧ ⌒ ⛦ ⌒ ⛧ ⌒ ⛦ ⌒ ⛧⌒ ⛦
extras:
• snoring monster new!
jungkook has a habit of snoring, and nabi had enough of it.
• missing you
you're on a summer girls trip and jungkook and nabi miss you a lot
• grumpy baby
nabi is teething
• obsessed
jungkook and nabi are obsessed with your mummy milkers.
• fighting jealousy (m)
you distract jungkook while he's boxing.
• sleepy mornings (m)
you're sleepy and needy
• midnight interruption (m)
all jungkook wants is a little alone time with you, but nabi doesn't agree.
• his type
you pout about wanting jungkook's attention
• pretty in pink (m)
your first valentine's day with your boyfriend.
• baby
jungkook calling you "baby" for the first time.
• mummy milkers
you taking care of nabi.
• can u give me a hickey?
you asking jungkook for a hickey.
↬ your mum's reaction to the hickey
• fake mama
jungkook pretending you're nabi's mum in front of a stranger.
• first meeting
jungkook meeting nabi for the first time.
• why are ur cheeks so red?
you making jungkook flustered.
• jk's spa salon's special treatment
jungkook helping you to relax.
• can i cuddle u?
your first sleepover at jungkook's place.
• tummy hurt
jungkook comforting you during your period.
• he's never made a woman not cum
you telling jungkook how men fail to please you in bed.
• jelly jk
jungkook stumbling upon you and taehyung making out on your bed.
in which jungkook fucks his girlfriend raw in the middle of a performance because he's addicted to that pussy.
❪ PAIRING ❫ : idol bf!jungkook x gf!f.reader
❪ GENRE ❫ : established relationship au, porn with no plot, smut and fluff
❪ WARNINGS ❫ : 18+, explicit smut, semi public sex, quickie, rough sex, doggy style, unprotected sex, penetrative vaginal sex against the wall, praise kink, dirty talk and degradation, he calls her a slut, size difference, spanking, manhandling, lots of clit play, makeout, scratching, mentions of pain, creampie, slight overstimulation and orgasm control, he gives it to her hard, a little breeding kink, cum play, use of panties as a plug to keep the load in
❪ WC ❫ : 2.2k
❪ NOTE ❫ : couldn't help myself so i wrote a quick smut drabble cos i've been feral since watching jungkook perform in that jacket, i felt like you naughty girls deserved to join in on the fun so enjoy reading and wet dreams ! <33
「 MASTERLIST | READ ON WATTPAD 」
“wait for me baby, don't go anywhere.”
that was what your boyfriend jungkook had rasped two hours ago after kissing you breathless enough to leave your legs shaky and then he ran back onstage.
you stood just off the main stage, your heart pounding in your chest, feeling the sexual desire wafting between you both even though he was away giving all his energy and power to singing and dancing with his members.
but you only got the version of him no one else got or knew about, the one who glanced toward you between songs, eyes locking on yours with a hunger that had nothing to do with the performance.
it was as if he were giving his own personal sultry show to you instead of thousands of fans screaming his name.
you watched a droplet of sweat trace a line down the middle of his chest almost pornographically, like it begged for your tongue to lick it right off and you wanted to so badly.
now during the short break after one of their songs, jungkook jogged offstage for a quick towel and water, his denim jacket with nothing underneath parted to show off his sweat slick muscular body, his jeans low enough to show off the tiny hint of his calvin klein underwear.
he tossed the towel aside and made a beeline straight for you, ignoring the staff calling after him.
“fuck i've been thinking about you the whole time.”
his voice was husky from singing, a little breathless as well, he grabbed your wrist impatiently before you could even reply and pulled you deeper into the backstage down the corridor for more privacy.
“i can't focus when i know you're right there watching me.”
“jungkook the performance and the fans—”
you started but your protest melted into a gasp as he pushed you against the wall directly out of sight.
“they can handle the next song. i need you now.” he grumbles.
his eyes were dark, pupils blown wide with lust and with pent up energy that he wants to take out on you.
he spun you around without waiting, pressing your chest against the wall, his front molding to your back as you felt the hard line of his erection already straining against his jeans.
“it's been hard since i saw this tight little ass in those jeans.”
“kook...”
you whimpered at his words, your back already arching for him, your eyes growing half lidded.
“god i love it when you call me that.” he rushes out.
his hands moved fast before you could even catch a breath, yanking your jeans and your panties down your thigh in one rough tug.
you could hear the cheers of the crowd and the beat of the music still playing, everything made you both feel alive and the thrill that you both might get caught at any second, yet instead of stopping you it made you hornier, your pussy giving a twitch.
“shitt you're already wet.”
jungkook groaned low, one hand sliding between your legs to tease your folds, feeling the copious amounts of arousal you leaked.
his fingers were so skilled, always knowing how to find your clit like an expert and it makes you shudder each time as he circles your clit once twice before dipping inside just enough to make your knees buckle but not fully inside, just giving you a little taste of what's about to come.
“all this for me hmm? while i was out there dancing?”
you bit your lip hard, nodding frantically.
“yes kook p-please...” you panted.
he chuckled as he grabbed your hips, leaning down to nip at your earlobe.
“atta girl, keep quiet for me yeah? can't have them hearing how i fuck my baby backstage.”
he pulled the zipper down, freeing himself, his cock hard and throbbing hotly, precum already beading at the tip.
he rubbed it along your slit coating himself in your essence, letting out a string of curses at the warm feeling of you.
there was no time for foreplay and time was running by fast and he had to join everyone on the stage so he didn't wanna waste any time.
jungkook was big, always had been and each time he decided to impale you on his cock, it felt like the very first time even though the stretch had gotten familiar.
“ahh... yes…”
you let out a long relieved whine at the feeling of him coming home inside you as he pushed in slowly inch by inch, intentionally letting you feel every ridge and vein of his dick and how he twitches inside you.
“fuuuuck...”
he hissed through gritted teeth, forehead dropping to your shoulder as he felt your pussy clench on him, welcoming him inside with a wet hungry swallow like it'd been dying for him to be inside.
his one hand gripped your hip hard enough to bruise, the other hand on the wall above your head.
“so tight, always so fucking perfect for me.”
he growls and grunts like a madman and you respond with a moan of yours.
he bottomed out with a deep,manly noise and he watched with hooded eyes at the way your ass quivers.
the fullness was overwhelming, his cock buried deep and pressing against that spot inside you that made you see stars behind your eyelids.
for a second he just stayed there, breathing hard, both of you listening to the crowd outside, then he started moving and you were already a squirmy mess.
backshots or whatever they called it.
receiving that from him always turns your brain to mush and it felt like he was literally rearranging your insides.
hard, quick, yet rough thrusts that only happened when he was trying to make you cum fast and with each thrust from him, you rocked harder against the wall, your hand scrambling to grab onto something and not being able to help yourself, you gripped his hand tightly, your nails digging into it and the pain fueled him even more.
the angle was perfect and with every thrust he reached that special spot inside you.
his hips moved like a needle does on a sewing machine, your tongue lolls out lewdly, almost drooling in the mindless pleasure.
squelch. squelch. squelch.
obscene noises were made each time he pumped in and out and in and out, his heavy balls slapping against your clit, sending jolts through you.
each thrust made your breasts bounce under your top, nubs hard and aching against the fabric.
“listen to that!” he snarls.
“hear how wet you are? taking my cock so willingly while everyone out there thinks i'm just taking a break.”
you sobbed, trying to muffle it against your arm though it didn't do much help anyways.
“kook… faster p-please, i need—”
he didn't let you finish your words because he obliged instantly, picking up the pace, his hips slamming inside you.
the same control he used on stage now driving you into insanity.
sweat dripped from his hair and onto your back, his free hand snaked around you to rub your clit in a tight fast rubs, matching the brutal rhythm of his cock.
your lips remained perpetually parted, letting out little “uh uh uhs” with each of his thrusts, not having any control to hold yourself up, your body was held like a ragdoll with one of his arms alone.
“yeah uh huh? you like this?”
he asks, mockingly imitating one of your noises with a breathless chuckle.
“oh god..”
you mewled, not even processing his words enough to reply to him.
“answer me when i ask a question. tell me, do you like getting pounded like a secret slut while i'm supposed to be performing?”
he lets out an animalistic sound, his palm coming down to give a sharp spank on your butt cheek, most definitely leaving a red handprint there.
“nhnnmm ahh y-yes so good. i want more. i want more pleaseee.”
you choked out letting out quiet squeals, unable to keep up with his fucking while he poked the inside of his cheek with his tongue, his head falling back, adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed.
“of course you want more, this pussy never gets enough does it huh? so greedy.”
he gives you a few more hard thrusts, his hips circling occasionally doing that grinding rhythm that makes your toes curl while you start fluttering hard around him as if trying to just trap him inside you forever.
“dammit you feel so good, g-gonna cum so hard inside you baby.”
he stutters, his brows furrowing.
the pressure was starting to build fast so fast, from the way he dominated you, from his words, the rush of adrenaline and everything else... it was too much yet so amazing at the same time.
you wanted more, more and more.
your head thrashed side to side as you felt like he'd just hit deep inside your stomach, your hand scratching red lines on his tattooed wrist.
“yes—yes—yes—”
you yelped, trembling uncontrollably as you felt so near to your orgasm.
“that's it cum on my cock, let me feel you.”
he starts pounding you, angling your hips, manhandling you so he's able to reach the depths inside you that you didn't even know existed.
his hand quickening on your clit, doing that side to side and up and down motions on your clit, he knows it drives you a little insane.
he knows that you love it when he plays around with that little sensitive button of yours.
when he decides to pinch it between two fingers and holding on while delivering sharp thrusts, did it finally break you.
you came with a loud scream that ended in a wail.
“hahhh!”
your pussy pulses around his pistoning length, milking him, making his pace falter at the heavenly feeling of you cumming around him.
but he soon picked back up, fucking you through it and chasing his own release while making your juices splash everywhere making a mess on the floor beneath you.
his breaths turned ragged, thrusts losing their rhythm as he got closer and closer.
thrust. thrust. thrust.
“gonna fill this cunt up baby ughh!”
he hisses, slapping his palm beside your head as he buried himself to the hilt and came.
“mmmph..”
you let out a pathetic muffled noise as hot spurts of his cum filled you to the brim, leaving so much of the white mess as he ground his hips slowly, murmuring expletives while pressing open mouthed kisses along your shoulder.
for a long moment you both just panted, bodies locked together, both of you throbbing in the same way with heartbeats racing together.
he didn't wanna leave you so soon or lose the feel of this sweet cunt wrapped around him that he was addicted to but time was almost up, he could hear the members getting ready and the staff calling for his name.
with a reluctant groan, he pulled out slowly with a grunt and an “ohh” leaves you from the empty incomplete feeling.
your pussy gaping right in front of his eyes, leaking his cum as if saying without words how much she misses him already, he had to force his eyes away or else he'd probably just cancel everything and throw you over his shoulder and take you back to the hotel.
he pulled you close pushing your panties and jeans up, smoothing over them while you squirmed at the sodden feeling but the way he held you tighter confirmed that this was exactly what he wanted.
“you okay?”
he asked, eyes searching yours with concern and cups your cheek.
you nodded, a wanton moan leaving you as he kissed you deeply, tongue tangling with yours, tasting your cherry chapstick and your natural taste that he knows by heart.
“i love you so much, i will be finishing the show as soon as possible and then i will take you back to the hotel to finish this properly, you get me yeah?”
he patted your clothed butt and you giggled even as your legs still trembled a bit as he leaned down to steal another kiss.
“i love you too, go kill the rest of the performance pretty boy.” you cooed.
he grinned at the praise, cheeks flushing, that bunny toothed smile breaking through the post sex haze which you adored so much.
he adjusted his earpiece and took a few steps forward but he paused and turned to look back at you.
“keep those panties on, i want my cum leaking out of you when i come back to you.”
he winks, wiping sweat from his brows and rushing back toward the stage as if nothing had happened and he hadn't just said the filthiest thing ever.
you leaned against the wall with a giddy laugh, catching your breath, feeling his cum slowly start to sweep into your panties.
you watched him rejoin his members and dance like he hadn't just ruined you backstage.
your beautiful man is glowing even more now.
but one thing he didn't forget to do every now and then was look back at you with that secret smirk.
the world wanted him, yet you had him all to yourself and you never felt more lucky.
he was yours and you were his, it was a forever kinda thing.
you watched his tongue trace his bottom lip while singing and watching you with bedroom eyes.
namjoon's younger sister has been beside bts since their trainee days. everyone treats her like family. everyone except jungkook, because somewhere between endless bickering, shared beds after exhausting schedules, hidden midnight conversations... things stopped feeling platonic. unfortunately for them, the internet notices first.
pairing: idol!jungkook x y/n warning/genre: fluff | friends to lovers | slow burn | idol!au | clingy jungkook | reader&jungkook are annoying asf| they are very intimate
Tiny footsteps immediately thundered across the living room anyway. Y/N sighed while standing in the kitchen.
“They never listen to me.”
From behind her, Jungkook wrapped his arms around her waist leaving soft kisses on her neck and cheek.
“That’s because you laugh every time they break rules.”
“I do not.”
“You absolutely do.”
A tiny voice suddenly yelled from kitchen doorway, “Dad said bad word yesterday!”
Y/N turned slowly to look at the man behind her Jungkook froze.
A small child stood proudly in the hallway holding a plushie while another one peeked from behind trying not to laugh.
Traitors. Absolute traitors.
Jungkook immediately defended himself.
“It wasn’t a bad word.”
“You said shit.”
Y/N looked at him in disbelief, fully turning towards him now.
Jungkook pointed dramatically.
“I was frustrated.”
“You taught our child to swear.”
“It builds character.”
“It builds parent teacher meetings.”
⸻
The living room exploded into chaos again.
Jiwoo climbed onto Jungkook immediately demanding breakfast while Minseo tugged onto Y/N’s sleeve asking where their uncle Taehyung was.
“Probably teaching Bam bad habits again,” Y/N answered tiredly.
⸻
The house felt alive.
Pictures covered nearly every wall now. Wedding photos, tour memories, family trips, blurry late night pictures.
And somehow even after all these years, Jungkook and Y/N still always ended up beside each other in every single one.
⸻
“Mom.”
Y/N looked down.
“Were you really dad’s best friend first?”
Jungkook immediately gasped dramatically.
“WERE??! I still am!”
The child ignored him completely.
Y/N smiled softly.
“Yeah. For a really long time.”
“Then how did you know you loved him?”
Jungkook looked way too interested in the answer suddenly.
Y/N laughed quietly.
“I think… I always did.”
Jungkook physically melted.
“Okay I’m emotional now.”
“You’re emotional every day.”
“Because I love you every day.”
Jiwoo groaned loudly.
“EWWWW.”
⸻
Rain poured softly outside that night. Blankets covered the living room floor.Half eaten snacks sat forgotten on the coffee table.
Jiwoo slept against Taehyung’s shoulder while Minseo laid sprawled across Y/N and Jungkook like a tiny exhausted starfish.
Family movie night.
Which somehow had turned into watching old wedding videos. The kids woke up at the sound of the word “wedding” because they had heard about it so many times before. Jiwoo used to cry when he was around 3 because he didn’t get to attend his parents’ wedding.
The kids had always wanted to watch the videos from their wedding day. Although they had seen plenty of pictures, Jungkook could never bring himself to watch the videos again because he always got too emotional.
Wedding video / flashback footage will be in Italic .
The TV screen flickered softly.
Then suddenly, their wedding video began playing.
Instant screaming erupted.
“LOOK AT JUNGKOOK’S FACE.”
“HE LOOKS LIKE HE’S ABOUT TO CRY.”
“HE DID CRY,” Hoseok corrected.
“I DID NOT.”
The entire room yelled:
“YOU DID.”
The video started with clips from earlier that morning.
Y/N is sitting infront of her vanity while getting her makeup done, looking nervous and excited at the same time. Her mother is sitting next to her holding her hand.
Then the screen switched to Jungkook.
Hair half styled, still wearing casual clothes. Pacing around the room anxiously.
“Bro sit DOWN,” Taehyung’s voice yelled from behind the camera.
“I can’t.”
“You’re literally sweating.”
“I think I’m going to throw up.”
Jungkook’s mom pat his back telling him to breathe in and out with Hoseok fanning him, Jimin and Jungkook’s brother laugh at him from the corner of the room.
The living room exploded laughing.
“Dad you were scared?” Jiwoo asked.
Jungkook looked offended.
“I was emotional.”
The video continued.
Clips of Namjoon helping Y/N with her dress carefully.
And for a second the room softened. Because even through the screen, Namjoon looked emotional.
His hands shook slightly while fixing part of her veil.
“You look really beautiful, Y/N.”
Y/N’s chest tightened instantly hearing it again years later.
Namjoon smiled softly at her reflection.
“I’m really proud of you.”
Namjoon immediately turn his head away from the screen. “Nope. Turn it off.”
“You’re crying,” Jin accused.
“I am NOT.”
Then the wedding ceremony appeared.
Soft flowers.
Warm lights.
Their families sitting together.
And then, Jungkook’s face the moment Y/N’s father walked her down the aisle.
“Oh my God,” Taehyung wheezed immediately. “He’s CRUMBLING.”
Because Jungkook genuinely looked seconds away from fainting.
Eyes glossy.
Breathing uneven.
Completely overwhelmed.
Jungkook dressed in black,hands trembling slightly while holding Y/N’s carefully. And despite the beautiful venue, the flowers, the lights he only looked at her.
Like nothing else existed.
Jungkook stood nervously holding her hands. His voice shaky already.
The room watching the video fell quieter automatically.
Even years later, everyone still remembered how emotional Jungkook looked that day. Like loving her was too much for his body to hold properly.
Then the vows came.
“I spent years thinking love was supposed to feel loud.”
“Like fireworks.”
“Like something impossible to miss.”
Jungkook smiled shakily.
“But loving you…”
He laughed softly under his breath.
“…was quiet at first.”
“It was waiting for you before schedules ended because I wanted to walk home with you.”
“It was saving food for you without thinking.”
“It was every song somehow reminding me of you.”
“It was reaching for you first whenever something happened.”
Y/N covered her face immediately tears threatening to fall. “Mama don’t cry.” Minseo said softly patting her kness to comfort her.
Taehyung wiped fake tears dramatically.
“He’s literally a poet.”
Jungkook’s eyes never once left hers.
“When was it that we fell in love?”
“Was it when we first met?”
“When we were eighteen?”
“Twenty?”
He smiled softly.
“I don’t know.”
“Because the truth is…”
A pause. Small and shaky.
“…I can’t picture a time when I wasn’t in love with you.”
Silence filled the living room.
Even the children stopped talking.
“I have never liked a smile as much as I like yours.”
“I have never felt as safe as I feel when I’m with you.”
“And I have never known love the way I know it with you.”
Y/N’s eyes watered instantly hearing it again.
Beside her, Jungkook quietly intertwined their fingers.
“You know me better than anyone.”
“You look into my eyes and somehow see every version of me.”
“The scared version.”
“The exhausted version.”
“The version even I don’t understand sometimes.”
His voice shook slightly now.
“And you love me anyway.”
Namjoon looked down immediately at this part.
Because everyone knew how much Y/N had loved Jungkook through every version of himself.
Then with shaky breath and tears rolling down his cheeks.
“I love you past my mind.”
“Beyond my heart.”
“I love you with my soul.”
Jimin physically covered his mouth.
“Okay that’s insane.”
Jungkook laughed nervously,
“I vow to love you loudly when you need reassurance and quietly when you need peace.”
“I vow to protect you.”
“To stay beside you.”
“To hold your hand through every beautiful moment and every terrifying one.”
“I vow to give you the best parts of me for the rest of my life.”
Then softer,
“And if there comes a day where you can’t love yourself…”
The video focused on Y/N who was crying already, lips trembling but a soft and warm smile on her lips.
“…I’ll love you enough for both of us until you can again.”
Complete silence.
Even Yoongi looked like he was about to burst out crying.
Then finally,
“You were home to me long before I put a ring on your finger.”
“Long before dating.”
“Long before either of us understood what this feeling was.”
Jungkook smiled tearfully.
“And I think a part of me has belonged to you since the very beginning.”
The room watching the video completely lost it.
Taehyung crying dramatically.
Jimin emotional.
Hoseok yelling, “THAT’S TRUE LOVE.” through tears.
Meanwhile Y/N buried her face into Jungkook’s shoulder.
“You’re ridiculous.”
“You married me.”
Then Y/N’s vows appeared.
And somehow, Jungkook looked even more emotional watching her than hearing himself.
Y/N smiled softly at him while holding back tears.
“I love you more every day.”
“And I don’t think I have ever loved you less.”
Jungkook immediately looked down pressing a soft kiss on top of her head, already emotional again.
“Not when we were teenagers.”
“Not when we fought over food.”
“Not when you woke me up in the middle of the night just because you wanted kisses.”
The room burst into laughter immediately. Jungkook smiled proudly with tears threatening to fall again.
“You know me better than I know myself.”
“And somehow…”
Y/N laughed shakily.
“…you love me more gently than I have ever loved myself.”
“You make me feel safe.”
“Safe enough to follow you anywhere.”
“Even to old motels in the middle of nowhere.”
Then she took a deep breath, swallowing the lump forming on her throat. And with a small smile on her face,
“I vow to stand beside you for as long as there are stars in the galaxy.”
“I vow to become someone you can always come home to.”
“Someone you can share happiness with.”
“And grief.”
“And exhaustion.”
“And ordinary days.”
“Because loving you was never only about the big moments.”
“It was always the little things.”
Jungkook’s eyes watered again immediately.
“If I could choose again in every lifetime…”
She smiled through tears.
“…I think I would still find my way back to you every single time.”
Seokjin sobbed loudly immediately clamping his hand over his mouth. The screen start looking blurry for everyone.
And the two kids present didn’t understand the emotions behind it but they felt it, their eyes fixed on the screen not making a single move.
Then Namjoon’s speech played.
And somehow that one hurt differently because for the first time, everyone saw Kim Namjoon not as BTS’s leader.
But simply a big brother.
Namjoon stood awkwardly holding a champagne glass.
Already emotional.
“I never pictured my little sister as someone’s wife.”
Y/N immediately covered her face in embarrassment.
Namjoon smiled softly.
“Honestly…”
“I never even pictured her in a wedding dress.”
“Because in my head she was still the little girl who cried when I left for Seoul.”
Y/N’s chest tightened instantly.
“She refused to let me leave.”
Namjoon laughed quietly.
“So eventually I just brought her with me.”
The room softened immediately. Because that single sentence held years inside it.
Namjoon looked toward Jungkook
And his expression softened even more.
“But Jungkook…”
A tiny laugh.
“You were just a kid too.”
“Shy.”
“Quiet.”
“Big eyes.”
The living room burst into laughter.
“BOBA EYES,” Taehyung yelled immediately.
Then quieter,
“Somewhere along the way…”
“you stopped feeling like just another member to me.”
“You became family.”
Namjoon’s voice shook slightly now.
“Someone I grew up with.”
“Someone I worried about.”
“Someone I helped raise beside the others.”
Y/N wiped tears quietly beside Jungkook now. Minseo looked around the room, then at her mother, although she didn’t understand why they were all crying she gently caress her mother’s arm with her tiny hand, because she thought “wedding” was supposed to be something happy and bright and colourful. But she didn’t ask anything.
Then finally,
“So although I never imagined giving my little sister away…”
Namjoon smiled softly toward them both.
“…I’m glad it’s you.”
“Because if there’s anyone I trust to love her for the rest of her life…”
His eyes glossed over slightly.
“…it’s Jeon Jungkook.”
Hoseok clapped his hands, “It’s so peak.” He cried.
Joined by Taehyung and then Jiwoo, who seem to understand the situation better than his little sister.
Then clips from their honeymoon began playing.
Beach sunsets.
Late night food dates.
Jungkook recording Y/N laughing while running from ocean waves.
And then Minseo suddenly sat upright dramatically.
“…WAIT.”
Everyone looked over.
“Why didn’t you take me with you?!”
Silence.
Then the child’s face crumbled immediately.
“So mean.” She sulked.
Y/N burst into laughter instantly.
Meanwhile Jungkook pulled her gently into his lap.
“Don’t cry, bub.”
Tiny sniffle.
“We would have taken you with us but we couldn’t.”
“Why.” She asked in her tiny voice almost crying now.
Jungkook smiled mischievously.
“Because you were made there.”
Silence.
Then suddenly, the child GASPPED.
Eyes huge.
“REALLY?”
“JUNGKOOK!,” Y/N wheezed.
But it was too late.
The kid jumped up immediately, completely healed.
“GONNA TO TELL ALL MY FRIENDS AND MISS NARI.”
Minseo jumped around the couch clapping her hands.
“NO YOU ARE NOT,” Y/N yelled instantly.
The room exploded.
Hoseok physically fell off the couch laughing. Namjoon nearly choked on his drink. Yoongi disappeared into the couch cushions from laughing too hard.
And Jungkook?
Jungkook looked devastatingly proud of himself.
“Her kindergarten friends are going to be jealous.”
“That’s not something to be proud of Jeon,”Y/N scold through laughter.
“Actually Jiwoo was the one they—“ Taehyung start but his semtence immediately came to halt when Jimin cover his mouth.
But honestly, watching everyone together like this, warm beneath soft lights and old memories it felt perfect anyway.
And maybe that’s why it all felt so inevitable.
Because long before the kisses, the confessions, the rings, and the forever.
Jeon Jungkook and Kim Y/N had already loved each other in all the quiet ways that mattered most.
⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆𓂃🖊
A/N: I’m so sad and also very happy that I finished this fanfic. Thank you everyone for everything🥺 gonna cry in the corner. For the vows, i took some inspo from the book ‘complete book of wedding vow’ by diane warner. I used to read it when i’m feeling sad and lonely lol.
Also a big congratulations to the boys for winning in all three categories. Im so proud of them, they really deserve more. And a big thanks to everyone who voted for them🤍.
And another thing, i’m writing a new fanfic but idk if yall are gonna like this one because it include angst in the beginning, we could say a lot but then it follow up with lots and lots of fluff lol.
Summary - For years, they existed in the space between friendship and love, too close to be platonic, yet never enough to be real. He treated her like she was his in private, only to pull away the moment things became too serious.
The night she finally chose to walk away from the man who once consumed her entire world, she carried something else with her too.
Four years later, a little girl, or fate perhaps—bring them back to each other.
Genre : second chance romance, unrequited love (at first), slow burn, accidental pregnancy, Friends → strangers → lovers, angst, fluff
Themes : emotionally unavailable! Jungkook , unlabeled relationship, friends with benefits(kind of), fear of commitment, one-sided devotion, accidental pregnancy, absent father (he doesn’t know), girl dad! Jungkook, second chances, yearning, found family, angst with happy ending
⤷ series masterlist ˎˊ˗
The Life She Built
Y/N settled into her new life quickly. She worked as a teacher at the kindergarten that had opened a few months ago, just down the road from her apartment.
Her parents didn't think the job was necessary, but she insisted. She told them it was because one day she'd have to take care of a child of her own. And though she hated to admit it, she took it partly because she didn't want to think about him, she needed to keep her mind busy, her hands full, her heart distracted.
But somehow, after a few weeks of keeping herself occupied whenever she could, she found herself thinking about him anyway. About Jungkook. Not in the quiet moments, but in the crowded ones. Surrounded by people she enjoyed, buried in work, laughing at something a kid said, he'd slip in between the cracks, sharper and more often than in silence.
Jungkook would love this kid.
If Jungkook were here, he'd have laughed his ass off.
Jungkook would call this his new favourite dish.
The nights were worse. Alone in bed, Y/N would gently rub her belly and whisper to her child about little things, big things, everything. Her childhood. Her day. How she almost threw up at the word fart, just the word itself. Pregnancy was terrifying, and spending every day around children didn't help. When the kids first noticed she was pregnant, one little girl stood up proudly, reciting with absolute "Mama told me babies are made out of love." Y/N smiled at the time. She cried when she got home, souldn't stop, she cried until she fell asleep.
Once, during lunch, the sound of children chewing sent her running to the bathroom.
She whispered to her baby about Jungkook too. "Jungkook is your dad, but nobody has to know. We don't want an asshole like him in our lives." And then, quieter "Do you think he would've loved me differently if he knew about you? Do you think there was ever a moment, even a small one, when he actually loved me?"
_____
Jiho and Y/N talked every day. Jiho came over every weekend.
"How is everyone else doing?" Y/N asked one evening, making an americano for herself and Jiho. Jiho had been a lifeline. She took care of Y/N, looked after her, even bought her an espresso machine just so she didn't have to survive on instant coffee.
"They're okay. Same as always. We miss you so much. Mingyu suggested a surprise visit and I had to come up with so many lame excuses I've lost count." Jiho's voice carried a weight she couldn't hide. "I don't think we can keep this quiet much longer."
She felt guilty, keeping something this big from their friends, lying by omission every single day. But it was for Y/N. There were close calls, like that one time she'd mentioned Y/N's cravings and someone asked what cravings, and she'd covered it up with a quick "period cravings." The lie sat sour in her stomach every time.
Y/N felt it too. Eunwoo and Mingyu checked on her constantly, and she knew it was only a matter of time before the boys found out. She could only hope they'd understand. "I know," Y/N said, her voice quiet, threadbare. "I feel awful too. But you know I have to do this."
Jiho nodded. She knew Y/N's decision was the only one that made sense right now. Still, every time she saw Jungkook, she had to fight the urge to kick him square in the balls. And sometimes, when the weight of it all pressed down on her chest , she wanted to cry. Because her best friend was carrying his child. And they were hiding it from him.
________
Jungkook had asked Jiho about Y/N once. Just once. She'd given him nothing, a shrug, a vague she's fine and he hadn't had the courage to ask again. But he felt the emptiness more than he'd expected to. He missed her. Her presence. Her jokes that weren't even funny. Her laugh. Her scent. He started dating again, hoping someone new could fill the space she'd left. It didn't last.
One night, in the middle of it all, while his girlfriend was on top of him, breath heavy, moving, he moaned a name that wasn't hers.
Y/N.
Her hips stopped. His eyes shot open. She slapped him so hard his jaw throbbed until the next morning. Without a word, she got up, pulled her clothes on, and walked out. The door slammed so hard the windows rattled. Jungkook fell back onto the bed, both hands covering his face. "I need therapy," he whispered to the ceiling.
That was the last time he tried. No more girlfriends. No more hookups. No more pretending someone else could be her.
________
It was late — the kind of late where the city dims and the only sounds are the hum of streetlamps and the distant bark of a dog. Jiho had been home, already in her sleep clothes, when her phone buzzed with Mingyu's name on the screen. He needed help packing the delivery orders. She sighed, changed, and went. The shop was warm when she stepped inside, the overhead lights casting a tired yellow glow over scattered piles of folded clothes. Boxes sat half-open on the floor, a roll of tape had rolled under the table. It was normal. Messy. Chaotic. The kind of chaos she'd grown used to being around.
Jiho grabbed the list and began checking items one by one, crossing off names with a pen she found tucked behind her ear. Jungkook worked beside her, folding, matching, stacking in silence. Mingyu and Jaehyun had been out delivering since evening, their van cutting through streets Jiho knew by heart. Eunwoo sat in the corner, phone pressed to his ear, handling calls and messages in a low, tired voice. The air was thick with routine. And then Jungkook spoke, "Are you visiting Y/N soon?"
Jiho's hand froze mid-check. The pen hovered over the paper. It caught her off guard, not because the question was strange, but because it was him asking it. Jungkook hadn't said Y/N's name since she left. Not once. He carried her absence like a bruise he never touched, never acknowledged, never let anyone see. And now, standing among folded shirts and half-taped boxes, he'd finally broken the silence. Jiho forced her voice steady. "Mmhm. I'm actually visiting her tomorrow."
Jungkook nodded. A small, stiff motion. His hands kept folding. A pair of jeans, then a sweater, but his fingers moved slower now, like his mind was elsewhere, swimming through waters he'd been avoiding.
"Tell her I said Hi."
The words came out quiet. Casual. Almost throwaway. But beneath them, buried in the space between his syllables, there was a whole universe of things he didn't say.
He wanted to tell Jiho to tell Y/N that he was sorry. That he woke up some mornings reaching for a side of the bed that was cold. That her laugh played on a loop in his head at night when he couldn't sleep. That he saw her face in crowds, in the reflection of shop windows, in the pause before he fell asleep. That he missed her, not the idea of her, but her. The weight of her. The warmth. The way she'd scrunch her nose when she laughed at her own bad jokes.
He wanted to tell her that he loved her. That he'd always loved her. That the reason he pushed her away, let her go, didn't fight for her was because he was terrified. Not of her, but of what she made him feel. Of how deeply she'd carved herself into him. Of the kind of love that asks you to be vulnerable, to be seen, to trust that someone won't leave even when they know every broken piece of you. He wanted to say all of it.
But he didn't.
Because deep down, even if he couldnt fully accept it, even if it sat like a stone in his chest every single day he knew. Y/N was better off without him. She was happier. Or at least, she was learning to be. And he had no right to disturb that peace, no matter how much his own world felt like it was crumbling without her.
So he just folded another shirt and said nothing more.
_________
If you asked Jungkook what love was, he wouldn't be able to tell you. Not in words. Not in definitions or poetry or songs. He'd fumble, shake his head, change the subject.
But he knew it through Y/N.
He knew it in the way she kissed him, slow and deliberate, he knew it when she chose him over and over again. He knew from the way she pulled him close while their bodies are pressed together, swallowing each other’s words and moans, their sould intertwined.
_______
Y/N's pregnancy went better than anyone had expected. Her body adjusted in ways she hadn't dared to hope for, the morning sickness faded after the first trimester, the exhaustion settled into something manageable, and the wild swings of emotion became quieter, like waves that had learned to recede instead of crash. Her life, strangely, began to piece itself together.
She woke up in the mornings without that familiar weight pressing down on her chest. She went to work, came home, cooked meals she actually ate, slept through the night more often than not. There was a rhythm to it. A soft, gentle hum that hadn't existed when he was still in her life.
Sometimes, when Jungkook wandered into her mind uninvited, in the middle of grading a child's drawing or while stirring soup on the stove, she would curse him. Call him a stain on her timeline, a curse she had to break. Because look at her now. Look at how everything had fallen into place the moment she walked away. Her life felt safer. Calmer. Like she could finally breathe without splinters in her lungs.
See? she'd tell herself. It was him. He was the problem.
But she never believed it. Not really.
Because beneath the bitterness, beneath the anger she clung to like armor, Y/N had never stopped loving Jungkook. She didn't know when it would end. Didn't know if it would end. It was stubborn, rooted deep in places she couldn't reach to pull it out.
And how could she forget him, when she carried a part of him with her everywhere she went? When she felt his heartbeat under her own ribs? When she talked to her belly at night and heard echoes of his voice in hers?
She didn't know how to stop loving someone who had become a part of her blood.
Maybe she never would.
________
Everything went well. Better than well, like the universe had decided to give her this one thing without a fight.
Her water didn't break on the way to the hospital. There were no complications, no sudden panic, no moment where the world tilted off its axis. The pregnancy hadn't been as bad as she'd feared, she'd handled it, somehow, handled it well. And when the time came, her body knew what to do. Ten hours. That was all it took. Ten hours of labor, with Jiho's hand in hers the entire time, never letting go.
When Y/N first heard her baby cry, everything around her went mute. The machines, the voices, the distant bustle of the hospital —all of it disappeared, swallowed by a single sound. That cry. Raw and new and so impossibly alive. Tears spilled from her eyes before she could stop them, streaming silently down her temples as she lay there, breathless.The nurse lifted the baby, wiped her clean, and placed her on Y/N's chest with a warm smile.
"It's a girl."
The world stopped.
Y/N looked down at the tiny body resting against her, skin to skin, warm and damp and trembling with each small breath. She was so small, so impossibly small. Her fingers curled into fists no bigger than the tip of Y/N's thumb. Her eyes were closed, her mouth slightly open, her chest rising and falling in a rhythm that felt like the most important sound in the universe.
My babygirl.
She didn't realize she'd whispered it until she heard her own voice, soft, cracked, full of something she couldn't name.
The nurse draped a cloth over the baby's back, drying her gently while she lay on Y/N's chest, then covered them both with a warm blanket. The baby nuzzled instinctively, searching for warmth she already knew, and within minutes, she was asleep. Peaceful. Curled up like she'd never left the safety of Y/N's belly.
The doctor stepped out to update her parents that the mother and baby were healthy. No complications, a perfect delivery.
But Y/N barely heard any of it. She couldn't take her eyes off the baby. "She's so tiny," she whispered, over and over, like a prayer she couldn't stop saying. She studied every inch of her. Her skin, still flushed red, softening into pink. Her tiny hands, faintly blue at the fingertips. The way she slept with her face turned slightly toward Y/N's heartbeat, as if she still recognized it. As if she knew she was home. Y/N lay there, her arms wrapped around her daughter, and let the silence settle around them like a second blanket.
She didn't think about Jungkook. Not yet. For now, there was only this, her babygirl, warm and safe sleeping on her chest like she'd always belonged there.
Jiho started staying over more often after the birth, showing up with groceries, taking over night feeds so Y/N could sleep, holding Jiyeon while Y/N showered. Y/N's mother took leave from work until she was fully recovered, and her father made sure they never wanted for anything. He showed up with bags of food, medicine, vitamins and a few weeks after they got home from the hospital, he started bringing toys too. A plush bunny. A rattle shaped like a star. A tiny dress that Y/N cried over before Jiyeon even grew into it.
There wasn't a single moment when Y/N felt like she needed Jungkook by her side. Not one. She was happy. Safe and loved. Surrounded by people who showed up without being asked, who held her when she cried, who celebrated every small milestone like it was their own.
Her mother had suggested the name. Jiyeon. She'll grow up to be a beautiful woman, she'd said, full of wisdom and grace. Just like her mother.
Y/N had smiled, cheeks wet, and agreed. She felt it all, the happiness, the excitement, the overwhelming swell of emotion every time she thought about raising a daughter.
A mini her
But she was oh so wrong.
Time passed quickly, the way it always does when you're too busy living to notice. Jiyeon grew up faster than Y/N had ever prepared herself for.
The first time she stood up on her own, Y/N was in the kitchen making a cup of tea. She turned around and there she was, tiny hands gripping the edge of the coffee table, legs wobbling, face scrunched in concentration. And then she let go. One second. Two. Standing on her own two feet like she'd been doing it her whole life. Y/N burst into tears. Right there, mug in hand, crying like a child herself. Because it felt like just yesterday she'd held her for the first time, that warm, tiny weight against her chest, still pink, still learning how to breathe. And now she was standing. Leaving the newborn days behind whether Y/N was ready or not. It all felt like a dream. A beautiful, blurry, heartbreaking dream.
And the fact that Jiyeon looked exactly like Jungkook didn't help.
It was uncanny, really. The same eyes, dark, deep, and huge. The kind that crinkled at the corners when she laughed. The same nose, the same lips, the same smile that could light up an entire room and break your heart in the same breath. She was his replica. A tiny, walking, breathing copy of the man Y/N had spent years trying to forget.
Y/N sometimes hated it. Hated that her daughter took so little from her. She'd search Jiyeon's face for something that was undeniably hers, and all she could find was her hair. The same shade, the same texture. Everything else, the curve of her jaw, the shape of her ears, the way she tilted her head when she was curious, all Jungkook.
As Jiyeon grew, her personality followed the same path. She was stubborn in a way that felt familiar. Loud when she wanted attention, quiet when she was observing. She loved certain foods and hated others with a passion that made no sense for a child her age. She tapped her fingers on tables when she was bored. She bit her lip when she was thinking. She laughed with her whole body, throwing her head back like the world was the funniest place to be with her bunny teeth showing.
All of it. Every single habit. Every like, every dislike, every little quirk.
Him.
"At least her first word wasn't 'Dada,'" Y/N would mutter to herself on the hard days, when Jiyeon looked at her with those eyes and she felt her chest crack open. She said it like a prayer, like a small victory she could hold onto. A tiny comfort. She said 'Mama' first. That's mine. That one thing is mine.
And yet, Y/N looked at her daughter, sleeping peacefully, her face a perfect copy of a man she once loved, maybe still loved and she felt it. That fullness in her chest. That warmth that spread through her like sunlight.
Everything in her life was complete. Everything she had dreamed of, everything she had ever wished for, was right here in front of her.
Even if it came wrapped in a face that reminded her, every single day, of what she'd left behind.
_________
Two years passed within a blink.
Just like that. Two whole years, gone like smoke through open fingers.
Within those two years, Y/N learned more than she had in the decade before. She learned how to survive on three hours of sleep and still function. She learned that love doesn't always look like what the movies show, sometimes it looks like vomit on your favorite shirt at 2 a.m., like rocking a screaming baby for hours until your arms go numb, like crying in the bathroom because you're so tired you can't remember the last time you felt like yourself.
She learned that you can leave someone you thought you couldn't live without. That the world doesn't stop turning. That your heart keeps beating, even when you're sure it's broken beyond repair and she learned that sometimes, when you lose one kind of love, the universe blesses you with another.
Two years passed so quickly, with so much happening, that Y/N sometimes couldn't tell the difference between her dreams and actual moments that happened. Was that a real memory, Jiyeon's first laugh, bubbling up from her tiny chest like honey or had she imagined it so many times that it felt real? She didn't know anymore. The days blurred together, soft and warm and exhausting, and she let them.
She never spoke of Jungkook anymore. Not to Jiho, not to her mother, not to anyone. His name sat in her throat like a stone she'd learned to swallow. But that didn't mean she thought about him less.
If anything, she thought about him more.
He was there in every little moment from the moment she held Jiyeon in her arms alone for the first time. In every big one. The day Jiyeon laughed for the first time. The day Jiyeon took her first steps, wobbling, determined, arms outstretched, Y/N watched and thought of him. The day she said her first word. Mama. Y/N cried and laughed and held her close, and somewhere in the back of her mind, she heard his voice. When Jiyeon started feeding herself, smearing food across her face like war paint, Y/N laughed until her stomach hurt. And then she thought of him.
He was everywhere. In the curve of Jiyeon's smile, in the stubborn set of her jaw, in the way she hummed when she was focused on a toy. He was in the air she breathed, in the silence before sleep, in the spaces between heartbeats.
Y/N had stopped speaking his name. But she had never stopped carrying him with her. She had just learned how to live with the weight.
_______
Jungkook knew the feeling of losing a loved one well. He had learned it young, learned it deeply, learned it in ways that carved themselves into his bones and never quite healed.
And he knew, better than most, that death wasn't the only thing that could come between people.
The first time he felt it, he was just a boy.
His parents sold his dog, his best friend, his shadow, the only living thing that greeted him with pure, uninhibited joy at the end of every school day. He came home one afternoon and the house was quieter. No barking. No scratching at the door. Too much trouble, they said. Distracting you from your studies. He didn't cry in front of them. He waited until he was in his room, face buried in his pillow, and let the tears soak through until there was nothing left. He never asked for another dog. He never asked for anything again.
The second time was when they moved to Seoul, leaving his grandmother behind in Busan.
She had been his everything. She was the one who cleaned the scratches on his knees when he fell off his bike, humming an old tune as she dabbed alcohol on the wound. She was the one who tucked him in at night, smoothing the blanket over his shoulders, pressing a kiss to his forehead like he was the most precious thing in the world. She was the one who held him when he cried, who never told him to stop, who let him fall apart in her arms and put him back together with nothing but her presence.
She was the only person who ever made him feel like his existence mattered.
And then they took her away from him. Not through death, through distance. Through a move he had no say in. Through weekend phone calls that grew shorter and fewer until they stopped altogether. He visited her sometimes, but it was never the same. The warmth was still there, but the miles between them had stretched it thin, like elastic that had lost its snap.
The third time happened when he was in high school.
By then, Jungkook had already learned to keep most of himself hidden. He didn't ask for things anymore. Didn't expect much from the people around him. He had learned, early on, that wanting things only led to disappointment, so he stopped wanting. Or at least, he stopped showing it.
But music and art—those found him anyway. It started small. A melody he couldn't get out of his head, scribbled on the margin of a textbook. A drawing of the view from his window, done in ballpoint pen because he didn't have proper pencils. Slowly, it became the only thing that made sense. When the world felt too loud, too heavy, too suffocating, he picked up his guitar. He let his fingers move across the strings until the noise in his head quieted down. He drew until his hand cramped, filling page after page with shapes and shadows that didn't need words.
It was his escape. His way of breathing. His way of saying everything he couldn't say out loud. His father never understood it. To his father, music was a distraction. Art was a waste of time. Everything that didn't lead to a stable job, a stable future, a stable life, it was useless. And Jungkook, who had never been good at explaining himself, who had never been given the space to try let the distance grow between them like cracks in dry soil.
Until one night. The night that broke whatever was left. He couldn't remember what started the fight. Maybe it was about his grades. Maybe it was about the hours he spent locked in his room. Maybe it was about nothing at all, just two people who had never learned how to talk to each other, finally reaching the end of a very short rope.
But he remembered the end. He remembered his father's hand wrapping around the neck of his guitar. The one he had saved up months of allowance to buy. The one he had stayed up late practicing on, fingers raw and blistered, because it was the only thing that made him feel alive. He remembered the way his father's arm swung up, the guitar suspended in the air for a split second and then the sickening crack as it came down against the floor. The wood splintered. The strings snapped, curling in on themselves like wounded things, pieces of the body scattered across the floor, and Jungkook just stood there, staring at the wreckage of the only thing that had ever felt like his.
He didn't scream. Didn't cry. Didn't say a word. He simply turned around and walked out.
Jungkook didn't remember driving to her place that night. He remembered walking out of his house, the front door slamming behind him, the cold air hitting his face, the splintered remains of his guitar still scattered across the living room floor. He remembered getting into his car, his hands were shaking, his chest felt like it was caving in. He didn't know where he was going until he was already there.
Her house.
The only place his heart had ever learned to point itself toward.
He knocked. Then he knocked again. And when she opened the door, sleepy, confused, hair messy. He didn’t say a word and stepped forward immediately. His face buried into her shoulder. His arms wrapped around her waist, tight, desperate, like she was the only thing keeping him from falling apart completely. Y/N didn't question him. Didn't push him away. She just held him tighter, her arms circling his back, one hand running up and down his spine in long, soothing strokes.
She didn't ask what happened. She didn't need to. She just held him, let him shake, let him breathe, let him fall apart in the safety of her arms. Minutes passed. Maybe longer. Time felt meaningless. Then her voice came, soft and warm, spoken into his hair like a secret. "Jungkook, let's go to my room, okay? My aunt's home tonight."
He pulled away slowly. His eyes were red, glassy, still holding back a flood he hadn't let himself release yet. He looked at her and nodded. "Okay."
She took his hand and led him inside.
That night, Jungkook cried in front of someone for the first time since he was fourteen years old. Since his grandmother's funeral, where he had sat in the corner of a crowded room, silent and hollow, tears streaming down his face while no one noticed.
Y/N had slipped past his walls before he even realized they were down.
He cried the whole night. Great, heaving sobs that tore through his chest like something had been clawing to get out for years. He cried for his dog, for his grandmother, for the guitar his father destroyed. For every moment he had been made to feel like he wasn't enough. For every time he had swallowed his pain and smiled through it. And through all of it, Y/N held him. She didn't tell him to stop. Didn't tell him it was okay when it clearly wasn't. She just wrapped herself around him and whispered, soft, gentle and grounding into his ear. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. You're safe.
For the first time in a very long time, Jungkook felt loved. Genuinely, completely, unconditionally loved.
And then he lost her too.
But this time, he had no one to blame except himself.
_________
Two years. Twenty four months. Seven hundred and thirty days.
Jungkook hadn't been the same since.
He lost interest in everything that used to fill his time. Women came and went, but he didn't notice them anymore, he didn't care to notice them. They blurred into the background of a life that had lost its color. His motivation dried up like a river in drought. He went through the motions, worked, ate, slept, repeated but there was no spark behind it. Just the hollow echo of a person going through the mechanics of living without actually being alive.
Outside, he looked perfectly still. Like the same old Jungkook. Same face. Same walk. But his friends noticed.
He didn't speak much anymore. The easy chatter that used to spill out of him was gone, replaced by long silences and one word answers. His smug personality, that playful, cocky grin that used to annoy and charm everyone in equal measure had completely disappeared. He didn't attend parties. Didn't go out unless he had to. Jaehyun watched him sometimes from across the room. And though a small part of him felt a pang of pity for the state Jungkook was in, there was another part, a deeper, quieter part that felt something else. Something close to satisfaction. the part that whispered. Let him feel a fraction of what he put her through.
Mingyu tried his best to keep Jungkook composed. He'd clap him on the shoulder, drag him out for coffee, force conversations that went nowhere. He didn't know the full story, none of them did, not really, but he knew enough. He knew Jungkook had broken something precious. And he knew some things couldn't be fixed by coffee and good intentions.
And then there was Eunwoo. Jungkook's unofficial therapist. The one person who didn't tiptoe around him, didn't sugarcoat, didn't cover up the truth to spare his feelings. Eunwoo said things exactly as they were, exactly as he saw them. No filters. No pity. Just blunt, honest words that cut through the fog.
"You're wasting away. Is this what she'd want?"
"You let her go. That was your choice. Now live with it."
Harsh. But true. And Jungkook needed that, needed someone to tell him the things he was too afraid to admit to himself.
Jiho felt something different around Jungkook now. Strange. Awkward. And underneath it all, a creeping sense of guilt that she couldn't shake no matter how hard she tried. She would catch herself staring at him sometimes, lost in deep thought. She'd watch his hands as he worked, the curve of his jaw when he was focused, the way his eyes dimmed when he thought no one was looking. And she'd wonder. What would he do if he found out?
What would he do if he knew he had a two year old daughter? A little girl with his eyes, his nose, his smile, a perfect replica of him running around, laughing, growing up without ever knowing his name.
Would he crumble? Would he run, like he always did when things got too real? Would he step up, finally become the man Y/N deserved, the father that little girl deserved? Or would the weight of it all crush whatever was left of him?
She didn't know. And that uncertainty sat in her chest like a stone, heavy and cold.
What if things had been different? she'd think, staring at him across the room. What if he had known from the start? Would he have changed? Would he have been better? Or would he have just hurt her all over again?
Jiho never found the answers. She wasn't sure she wanted to.
__________
Mingyu wasn't expecting anything interesting that day.
It was supposed to be simple. A quick trip to Suwon to meet up with a work friend, discuss a potential collaboration, maybe grab lunch, then head back.
But his car was in the shop. Again.
Because fucking Jeon Jungkook had crashed it.
Mingyu had been stupid enough to let him borrow it a few weeks back. Jungkook said he needed to clear his head, said he'd be careful, said he just needed to drive for a while. And Mingyu, trusting, hopeful, always giving people the benefit of the doubt had handed over the keys.
Big mistake.
Jungkook had shown up at the shop at 2 a.m., drunk out of his mind, the front bumper hanging off, the passenger side door dented beyond repair. He'd swerved off the road and into a guardrail. Lucky he didn't kill himself. Lucky he didn't kill someone else. Mingyu had to take a deep breath before he said anything that night, had to remind himself that Jungkook was hurting, that he wasn't himself, that pushing him away would only make things worse.
But damn it.
He blamed himself a little. He should have known better. Should have seen it coming. Jungkook had been spiraling for two years, and Mingyu had handed him a car and a full tank of gas like it was a solution. Stupid, he thought. So stupid.
So now he had to take the train.
Mingyu came across the place by chance.
He was walking through a quiet street in Suwon, phone in hand, checking the time until his train, when a warm glow caught his eye. Yellow light spilled through wide windows, soft and inviting. He slowed down, then stopped altogether.
Shelves of books lined the walls inside. Cozy armchairs. A counter with a coffee machine. And a small wooden sign hanging above the door that read:
The Brewed Book Café
Mingyu smiled to himself. Cute name. He figured he had time for a coffee before heading back, so he pushed the door open. A small bell chimed overhead, and the smell hit him immediately, fresh coffee and old paper. Well, he thought, it's a book café after all.
The space wasn't big, but it wasn't cramped either. A few tables and chairs were scattered thoughtfully around. Bookshelves lined every wall, packed with novels, poetry collections, and old hardcovers that looked like they'd been loved for years. It felt warm. Intentional. Like someone had poured their heart into every corner.
And then his eyes landed on her.
Y/N.
She was standing on a small wooden ladder, reaching up to arrange books on a high shelf. Her hair was longer now, tied loosely at the nape of her neck, a few strands falling free. She wore a simple cream sweater, sleeves rolled up to her elbows, revealing her forearms as she carefully slid a book into place. She looked calm. Different. In all the right ways.
For a moment, Mingyu just stood there, frozen, like he was seeing a ghost.
"Y/N?"
She turned.
Her eyes widened. "Mingyu?"
They stared at each other, suspended in that strange space between shock and recognition. Two years. Two whole years, and here they were, standing in a tiny book café in Suwon like it was the most natural thing in the world.
Then Y/N laughed, light, surprised and climbed down from the ladder. "What are you doing here?"
"I could ask you the same thing," Mingyu said, still trying to process. He looked around the café, at the books, the warm lighting, the little details that felt so her. "This is yours?"
She nodded, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "Yeah. I opened it a month ago."
Mingyu let out a low whistle. "Damn. I'm impressed." A genuine smile spread across his face. "It's so good seeing you."
Y/N smiled back, a little shy. "It's great seeing you too. My parents helped me a lot."
"They're such angels. You staying with them, or…?"
"Not anymore. I live right upstairs." She gestured vaguely toward the ceiling. "It's easier for me. Closer to the café, less commuting."
Mingyu nodded. For a moment, it felt almost like old times. Like none of the pain had ever happened.
And then something small bumped into Y/N's leg.
Mingyu looked down.
A tiny girl, maybe two, maybe three, stood there, wobbling slightly on unsteady legs. She clutched Y/N's sweater with both hands and hid behind her, peeking out with wide, curious eyes. Mingyu said nothing. He just stared.
Y/N bent down immediately and scooped her up. "What is it, baby?" she asked softly. The little girl pointed toward the counter. “sweet."
Her voice was soft, barely understandable, that sweet, slurred baby talk that made everything sound a hundred times more precious.
Y/N smiled and carried her to the counter, reaching into a small jar and pulling out a cookie. "Only one," she said gently. The little girl took it with both hands and giggled, shoving it into her mouth with uncoordinated glee.
Mingyu's brain had stopped working. He opened his mouth. Closed it. Opened it again. Finally, he managed to ask, "…Yours?"
Y/N nodded casually, like it was the most normal question in the world. "Yeah."
Mingyu's mouth opened slightly. A thousand questions swirled in his head. Whose? When? How? He bit his lip, forcing himself not to say anything stupid. "What's her name?" he asked after a long pause.
Y/N looked down at the little girl in her arms, her expression softening. She kissed the top of her head. "Jiyeon."
Mingyu whispered the name under his breath. "Jiyeon." He looked at the child, at her dark hair, her big eyes, her tiny nose. Something in his chest tightened. "That's a beautiful name."
He reached out gently and patted the top of her head. Jiyeon stared at him with wide, curious eyes, clutching her cookie like a treasure. Mingyu studied her face carefully, the shape of her eyes, the curve of her lips, the way her little brow furrowed when she was trying to figure him out.
He suddenly felt like he couldnt breathe. "Well… uh…I..um…" His voice came out awkward, stilted. "I'll see you around."
Y/N nodded, a small smile on her face. "Yeah. Come by again."
Mingyu turned and walked out of the café. The bell chimed behind him. The door clicked shut. And the moment he was outside, he started running. Straight toward the train platform. His heart was pounding, his mind racing, a single thought repeating over and over like a broken record.
________
Jiho was sitting lazily, leaning back in her chair, phone in hand, scrolling through Instagram without really paying attention. It had been a slow day at the shop, the kind of slow that made time feel sticky and endless. Jaehyun was behind the counter, wiping down already clean glass shelves just to have something to do.
Until the door slammed open.
Jiho jolted so hard she nearly dropped her phone. The bell above the door rattled violently, swinging on its hinge like it had been attacked. And there, in the doorway, stood Mingyu, chest heaving, face pale, eyes wide like he had seen something he couldn't quite believe. “You— I need to talk to you.” He say breathless pointing at Jiho. “Okay…” Jiho trailed off exchanging goances with Jaehyun who was sitting behind the counter.
Mingyu walked inside the storage room, Jiho following close behind. The moment the door clicked shut, he spun around to face her, his voice already spilling out in a small, panicky rush. "I went to Suwon."
Jiho raised an eyebrow. "I know."
"I walked into a café to grab coffee."
"Okay?"
"I saw Y/N." He paused, swallowing hard. "She had a little girl. Her name is Jiyeon. The baby looked at me." Each word came out like it was haunting him, dragging itself out of his chest with visible effort. Jiho sighed, a heavy, knowing sound. She had always known this day was coming. She had just hoped it would be later. Or never.
"Mingyu—"
"No, I'm not done." He held up a hand, his breathing uneven. "The baby looked at me. I looked back at her. And I saw her—no." He shook his head, correcting himself. "I saw him. I saw Jungkook in her. She looks exactly like fucking Jeon Jungkook. What the fuck!"
He grabbed at his hair, pacing in a tight circle, taking huge, ragged breaths like he couldn't get enough air into his lungs. "I came running home. I didn't even buy my damn coffee." He let out a hysterical laugh. "My coffee, Jiho. I left without my coffee."
Jiho gave him a moment. Let him pace. Let him breathe. Let the information settle into his bones, even if it made him rattle. Then Mingyu suddenly let out a gasp, freezing mid step. He whipped around and pointed an accusing finger at her. "Damn it. You knew everything." His voice dropped, but the weight of it doubled. "You told me nothing. You said nothing."
He looked haunted now. Shocked. Betrayed. All of it flickering across his face like a storm passing through. Jiho met his gaze steadily, keeping her voice calm and soothing. "Mingyu, let me explain everything. But first, you need to calm down." She took a small step closer. "Take a breath. Let's go out, and we'll talk about it, okay? I promise I'll tell you everything."
Mingyu stared at her for a long moment, chest still heaving. Then slowly, reluctantly, he nodded. "...Okay."
Jiho, Mingyu, and Jaehyun sat in the middle if the shop. Jiho's voice was steady as she finally told them everything.
The two guys listened without speaking a word. Jaehyun leaned forward, elbows on his knees, jaw tight. Mingyu stared at the floor, running his hands over his thighs like he needed something to ground him.
When Jiho finished, she let out a slow breath. "Any questions?"
Mingyu's hand shot up almost immediately. "So— you knew she was pregnant before she left?" Jiho blinked. She had literally said that three times already. "Mingyu, I just—" But before she could finish, a voice cut through the air from the front of the shop, sharp and curious.
"Who's pregnant?"
All three heads snapped toward the entrance. Standing at the door, keys still in hand, was Eunwoo. And right beside him, hands buried in his jacket pockets, expression unreadable, stood Jungkook.
Jiho's heart dropped into her stomach.
"My friend—" Jiho started.
"Y/N," Mingyu finished at the same time.
Jaehyun's head whipped toward Mingyu so fast his neck cracked. He stared at him in pure, undisguised disbelief, but Mingyu completely oblivious, kept talking. "But she already had the baby, so she's not pregnant right now. But she was."
A sharp kick landed on his shin under the table. Mingyu yelped, clutching his leg, wincing in pain as he rubbed his foot. Jiho's death glare bore into the side of his head, but the damage was already done.
Silence settled over the room like a heavy fog. Nobody spoke. Jiho, Eunwoo, and Jaehyun exchanged frantic glances, telepathically begging each other to say something, anything to fill the void, to redirect, to undo what had just been said.
Jungkook beat them to it.
"Good for her."
His voice was low. Casual. Almost unconcerned. Like someone commenting on the weather, or a sports score they barely cared about. But every single person in that room knew it was far from that. The words hung in the air, deceptively light, carrying a weight none of them dared to touch. Jungkook didn't move. Didn't react. Just stood there, hands still in his pockets, face carefully blank. And for a long, painful moment, no one said a word.
After the shop closed, Jungkook drove Eunwoo home.
It was a quiet drive. The kind of quiet that felt heavy, pressing down on both of them from the inside of the car. Streetlights flickered past in golden streaks, illuminating Jungkook's face in brief, fragmented flashes. His expression was unreadable, but his knuckles were white against the steering wheel.
Eunwoo watched him for a long moment before finally breaking the silence. "Kook. You okay?"
Jungkook's answer came too fast, too flat. "Why wouldn't I be?"
But his grip on the steering wheel tightened. His eyes were fixed on the road, but he wasn't really seeing it. His mind was somewhere else entirely spinning, spiraling, stuck on a name he hadn't heard in two years.
Eunwoo let out a short, annoyed breath. "Man, stop pretending for once." He turned in his seat, fixing Jungkook with a stare. "You know you can be real with me. For fuck's sake, you cried on my shoulder last week because you smelled her perfume on some random woman at the convenience store."
Jungkook's jaw tightened. "Stop bringing that up. Also, I was drunk."
"Right." Eunwoo snorted, a dry, humorless laugh. "Drunk. Sure."
Silence filled the car again. The hum of the engine. The soft thrum of tires against asphalt. Eunwoo thought that was the end of it, that Jungkook would retreat back into his shell and they'd finish the drive in silence.
But then Jungkook spoke again. His voice came out quieter this time, almost fragile. "Do you think she's married?" Eunwoo blinked.
"Or maybe engaged at least," Jungkook continued, words tumbling out faster now. "I mean, she's gotta have a man to have a baby, right? Will we get invited to her wedding? Do you think she'll invite me? What would she—"
"Jungkook." Eunwoo reached over and grabbed his shoulder, squeezing firmly. "Speed down. One question at a time, please."
Jungkook let out a shaky breath, his shoulders sagging. "Okay… okay."
"We'll talk when we reach my house, alright?" Eunwoo's voice softened. "Don't think about that right now. Just focus on driving."
Jungkook didn't answer. But he nodded, slowly, forcing his shoulders to relax, forcing his eyes back on the road ahead. The car carried on into the night, quiet once more but this time, it felt less like silence and more like a held breath, waiting to be released.
Jungkook couldn't sleep.
He had been lying in bed for hours, staring at the ceiling, his mind running in endless, exhausting circles. He couldn't eat either, the thought of food made his stomach turn. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw her face. And then he saw the little girl. Y/N's daughter. Her baby.
A kid. Y/N has a kid.
He let out a laugh, short, hollow, utterly devoid of humor. It wasn't funny. Nothing about this was funny. But the sound escaped him anyway, like his body didn't know how else to process the information. It felt like a dagger right through the heart. Cold and sharp, leaving a wound that wouldn't stop bleeding.
His hand moved on its own, reaching for his phone on the nightstand. He unlocked it. Opened his contacts. And there it was, her name. Still saved. Still unchanged after all this time. He had never been able to delete it. His thumb hovered over the screen, trembling slightly.
He needed to hear it from her. Needed to hear her voice, needed confirmation that it was real, that he hadn't imagined Mingyu's panicked words. Or better, he needed to see it. Needed to see her. Needed to see the baby. Needed to know if she was happy, if she was okay, if she had found someone better than him.
But he couldn't do it.
His thumb wouldn't move. His throat closed up. His chest tightened until he could barely breathe.
"Fuck," he cursed under his breath, voice cracking.
His vision blurred. His breathing turned ragged, uneven, each inhale a battle. And then, before he knew what he was doing, he hurled his phone across the room. It hit the wall with a sharp crack and clattered to the floor, screen shattered. "FUCK!" The scream tore out of him, raw and broken.
He fell back onto his bed, both hands dragging down his face before tangling into his hair, pulling at the roots like the physical pain might distract him from whatever was tearing through his chest.
He didn't know what this feeling was.
Fear? Anger? Sadness? Guilt? Regret?
Maybe all of it. Maybe none of it. Maybe something that didn't even have a name, something that only existed because of her. Because of what he did. Because of what he lost.
All he knew was that it was crushing him. And for the first time in two years, he had no idea how to survive it.
Jiho had already informed Y/N that the boys needed extra help at the shop, so she wouldn't be able to visit or text as often. Y/N understood.
Y/N had known this day would come the moment she decided to stay in Suwon, close enough to be found but far enough to build a life of her own. She had always known that someone would eventually figure it out. Mingyu was sharp, and Jiho carried guilt like a second skin. It was only a matter of time before the pieces fell into place. She was prepared for it. She had prepared for it a thousand times over in her head, what she would say, how she would explain, how she would protect her daughter from the fallout.
But there was one thing she couldn't stop thinking about.
Will they tell Jungkook?
And if they did, what would he think?
Would he be angry? Indifferent? Would he feel relieved that she had moved on? Would he feel nothing at all? Would he want to see Jiyeon? Would he run, like he always did when things got too real?
Y/N didn't have the answers. And that uncertainty sat in her chest like a stone she couldn't swallow.
She looked down at the bed, where Jiyeon was fast asleep. Her tiny chest rose and fell in a steady rhythm. Her lips were slightly parted, one chubby hand curled loosely around the edge of her blanket. She looked so peaceful. So innocent. So completely unaware of the storm that was brewing somewhere out there, threatening to find its way to her.
Y/N reached out and gently caressed her cheek, her fingers brushing over the soft, warm skin. A smile immediately formed on her lips. It didn't matter what Jungkook thought. It didn't matter what anyone thought. She had her daughter. She had this little life that depended on her, trusted her, loved her unconditionally. Jiyeon was her world now, her anchor, her reason, her everything.
No matter what happened next, as long as she had her baby beside her, she was happy.
And that was all that mattered.
Y/N leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to Jiyeon's forehead, lingering for just a moment.
"Sleep well, my love," she whispered. "Mommy's got you."
Then she turned off the lamp, curled up beside her daughter, and let the quiet hum of the night wrap around them both.
_________
Jungkook locked himself in his house.
Three days. Three days of staring at the same walls, the same ceiling, the same cracks in the plaster that he had memorized months ago. He didn't answer his phone. Didn't open the curtains. Didn't eat anything that could be called a proper meal. He just existed, sprawled on his couch, cigarette burning between his fingers, watching smoke curl toward the ceiling like it was the most interesting thing in the world.
Nobody called. Nobody knocked. It was like they all knew, knew that he needed to sit with it himself, to wrestle with it alone until he either made peace with it or let it destroy him. They knew better than to bother him.
On the third day, he heard loud pounding in his door. Jungkook didn't move. He took a slow drag of his cigarette, staring blankly at the door.
BAM. BAM. BAM.
Louder this time. More insistent. Then the door burst open. The lock gave way with a splintering crack, and a figure stormed inside like a force of nature.
Mingyu.
Jungkook said nothing. Didn't even spare him a glance. He stayed exactly where he was, half sprawled on the couch, smoke drifting lazily from his lips.
Mingyu crossed the room in three furious strides. He snatched the cigarette from Jungkook's fingers and stubbed it out in the ashtray with more force than necessary. Then he grabbed Jungkook by the arm, hauled him upright, and forced him to sit properly. Mingyu dropped onto the couch beside him, close enough that their shoulders almost touched.
"I hate seeing you like this."
Silence.
"You're going to find out one way or another, so I thought I better tell you everything now." Mingyu's voice wavered slightly. "So you'll feel better. Or maybe worse. I don't know anymore."
Jungkook finally turned his head, staring at his friend with confusion flickering behind his exhausted eyes. But no words left his mouth. He just waited.
Mingyu leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees, hands clasped together. He stared at the floor like it held the answers to questions he was too afraid to ask. "Yes, it's true. Y/N was pregnant. Well, is pregnant. I mean, she was. She has a kid now." He let out a frustrated breath. "A girl. Her name is Jiyeon. And she's cute as fuck, but that's not the point." He looked up at Jungkook, his eyes searching. "The baby, Kook. The kid. Her eyes, they were exactly like yours. Her nose, her lips, her cheeks. Everything." He paused. "Well, except her hair."
He waited for a reaction. For a breakdown. For screaming, crying, throwing something, anything. But Jungkook just sat there, staring at him with an expression that Mingyu couldn't read. "Don't you get it?" Mingyu asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
Jungkook opened his mouth. His lips moved. But no sound came out. And for the first time in three days, something flickered behind his eyes. Dawning realization.
Mingyu let out a sharp breath, running a hand through his hair. "Y/N's kid, her baby, it's yours. She was pregnant with your baby. She knew she was pregnant, and that's why she moved to her parents' house in Suwon. That's why she left."
The words hung in the air like a grenade.
Jungkook let out a laugh. A scoff, really. Short. Bitter. Disbelieving. Mingyu stared at him, confusion bleeding into disbelief. "What?"
"I don't believe you."
Mingyu's mouth fell open. "What are you—"
"She would've told me." Jungkook's voice turned cold, his expression snapping into something sharp and serious. "If whatever you just said was true, she would've told me. I refuse to believe it. It's not true. Not possible." His hand came down hard on the coffee table, a loud SLAM that made Mingyu jump. Jungkook stood up abruptly, walked to his bedroom, and slammed the door shut behind him with a force that rattled the walls.
Mingyu sat alone in the living room, staring at the closed door, unsure if he should follow or leave.
Inside the bedroom, Jungkook pressed his back against the door and slid down to the floor.
His chest heaved. His hands trembled.
Deep down, he knew.
He knew she wouldn't have told him. He knew she had every reason to keep it from him. He knew he had given her no reason to trust him, no reason to believe he would stay.
And deep down, so deep it hurt to admit he wished it was true. He wished he could turn back time. He wished he had been better. He wished he had been the man she deserved instead of the man who drove her away.
Jungkook finally understood what had been clawing at his chest for the past three days.
Fear. Anger. Sadness. Guilt. Regret.
___________
Across town, Y/N closed the café for the night.
She flipped the sign on the door, locked the deadbolt, and let out a long, tired breath. The warm glow of the café lights reflected off the wooden floors as she wiped down the counters one last time. Behind her, Jiyeon sat on the counter, swinging her little legs back and forth, humming a nonsensical tune only she understood.
"Mama."
Y/N turned, a soft smile already forming on her lips. "Yes, baby?"
"Story?"
Y/N's heart melted, as it did every single time. She dried her hands on a towel and walked over, scooping Jiyeon up into her arms. The little girl's small hands immediately found their way to Y/N's neck, hugging her tight.
"Of course. Let's go upstairs."
She carried her up to their small apartment above the café. It wasn't much, a cozy living area, a tiny kitchen, one bedroom that held both their hearts. But it was theirs.
Y/N tucked Jiyeon into bed, pulling the soft pink blanket up to her chin. She picked up the worn storybook from the nightstand, the one with the dog eared pages and the creased spine and began to read in a soft, gentle voice. By the time she reached the last page, Jiyeon's breathing had slowed. Her eyes fluttered closed, her tiny chest rising and falling in the peaceful rhythm of sleep.
Y/N set the book aside and gently brushed her daughter's hair away from her forehead, fingers lingering on the soft strands and Y/N whispered into the silence, so softly it was almost a secret. "You'll never have to wonder if someone will ever choose you."
She pressed a kiss to Jiyeon's forehead.
Because Y/N knew exactly what that felt like. She had spent years wondering, hoping, waiting, aching for someone to choose her. To stay. To prove that she was worth holding onto.
And she had learned, the hard way, that some people just wouldn't.
But Jiyeon would never know that pain. Not if Y/N could help it. She would grow up knowing she was loved, wanted, chosen every single day.
_________
Jungkook didn't go the next day.
Or the day after that.
But he passed the street three times. Each time, he slowed down near the café. Each time, his grip on the steering wheel tightened. Each time, he told himself he would go in. And each time, he kept driving. He said he needed to hear it from her. Needed Y/N to look him in the eye and confirm it herself. Needed to see her face when she told him the truth, whatever that truth was.
But every time he got close, his throat closed up, his chest tightened, and his foot found the gas pedal instead of the brake.
Mingyu finally lost patience.
He found Jungkook leaning against the hood of his car, arms crossed, staring blankly at the street ahead. Mingyu walked up to him and didn't bother with pleasantries. "You're acting like a coward." Jungkook didn't react. "You think ignoring it will make it disappear?" Mingyu pressed. "She's not going anywhere, Kook. She has a café. She has a life. She has your daughter. She's not a ghost you can just drive past."
Jungkook let out a long, heavy sigh. "You don't understand."
"Oh, I understand perfectly." Mingyu's voice softened, just a little. "You're scared she'll say yes. That it's true. That you have a kid you weren't there for."
He paused.
"And you're even more scared she'll say no."
Jungkook's jaw tightened. His hands, still buried in his pockets, curled into fists.
"That it's not yours. That she moved on. That you really meant nothing."
The words landed like a punch to the gut.
Jungkook swallowed hard because Mingyu was right. That was exactly it. He was terrified of both possibilities. Terrified of the truth, no matter which direction it leaned.
_________
Jungkook finally stepped inside one evening.
He told himself he was just walking past. Just taking an evening stroll to clear his head. His feet just happened to carry him here. It meant nothing.
The moment he pushed the door open, the smell of roasted coffee beans hit him, warm, rich, inviting. He looked around, taking in the space. The soft yellow lighting, the shelves lined with books, the cozy armchairs scattered around. It felt warm. Comfortable.
Like Y/N.
His eyes scanned the room almost involuntarily, searching for something he wasn't sure he was ready to find. And then they stopped.
In the corner of the café, on a small sofa slightly too big for her, sat a little girl. A book was spread open between her legs, her tiny fingers tracing the pages with intense concentration. Her hair fell softly around her face as she mumbled the words to herself, barely audible.
Jungkook didn't move closer. He didn't look away. And then the little girl looked up.
Their eyes met.
Jungkook's breath hitched. His heart started beating so fast, so loud in his ears, that for a moment he thought it had stopped altogether. He couldn't move. Couldn't breathe. Couldn't do anything but stare into those eyes, eyes that looked exactly like his own.
He turned toward the door and stormed out.
The cool evening air hit his face as he burst outside, but he didn't stop. He kept walking, then jogging, then running until he was far enough from the café that he could breathe again. He finally stopped, doubling over, one hand pressed against his chest as he tried to steady his heartbeat and his ragged breathing. "Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck." He cursed over and over, sinking down to sit on the edge of the street. Passersby gave him strange looks as they walked past, but he couldn't bring himself to care. His mind was a storm. His heart was a wreck.
After a few minutes or maybe an hour, he couldn't tell, he managed to pick himself up and stumbled to the nearest bench. He sat there as the evening turned to night, the streetlights flickering on one by one. Time slipped away from him. Minutes felt like seconds. Hours felt like nothing.
Finally, he pulled out his phone and called Mingyu. Mingyu answered on the first ring.
"I saw her." Jungkook's voice tumbled out, raw and shaky. "She stared at me. She looked at me with her eyes — her eyes that looked — she looked—"
"Jungkook." Mingyu's voice was firm but gentle. "I know. We know. Relax, okay? Where are you? I'll come to you."
Jungkook barely managed an okay. He tried to tell Mingyu where he was, only to realize he didn't really know. He had been walking in a haze, not paying attention to street names or landmarks.
When Mingyu finally found him, Jungkook tried to speak, tried to say more, tried to thank him for coming but his words caught in his throat. His eyes burned. Tears threatened to fall, and he couldn't stop them.
“Let’s go home first,” Mingyu said softly.
Jungkook nodded silently and walked toward the car.
Seeing Jungkook lose himself was rare. Seeing him cry was even rarer. But seeing him completely break down, that was something that had never happened before. Jungkook kept telling himself this was his fault. The consequences of his own actions. The price he had to pay for the choices he made two years ago.
But the aching in his chest never lessened.
It was raw. Brutal. And so, so empty.
A/N : I just want to say that I am so happy that I have people who appreciate my work. When i posted my first fanfic I mentioned that my works are pre written, I would read the stories I write to my friend and she recommended me to turn them into fanfictions and post them, and yea here am I. I edit my stories to match the characters of my fanfiction and add more details according to the characters I use. I have been writing stories and poems ever since I was a kid and it has always been a dream to share them with other people. I would suddenly get ideas and inspirations when I am listening to songs, or go to a particular place or even when I’m just laying in my bed.I’m still learning and I know I make mistakes a lot and it’s not perfect, but I write my stories with love and passion and I hope you all can respect my work and not call it ai generated. My friend actually found it very funny when I told her someone asked me to delete my work because it’s ‘ai generated’ because i’ve always been that friend who encourages others to stop using ai lol.
If you actually read my work I always try my best to explain and let the readers feel every moment, and I always want them to be able to picture every scene. If you don’t like my work please block me or ignore my posts and not threaten me or tell me to delete it because I put my heart into every sentence and every word.
I appreciate everyone who read my work and I never imagine reaching this far, it’s like a dream come true for me. All your support, your likes, comments and requests got me giggling and kicking my feet in the air. I love you all🤍🫂
My favourite chapter ever. It was originally 7.8k words but i added a few more lines haha.
He stops when he sees you, his eyes dropping to the running water before turning to your face. Even through the blur of your unshed tears, you can see the faint shift in his expression. The corners of his eyes twitch, a shadow of concern passing over his features before his face settles back into that careful, guarded mask.
"Are you okay?" he asks, voice low with a raspy rumble, rough around the edges from a long day of singing. "Yeah," you choke out, quickly leaning down to splash cold water onto your face before you reach for a towel, wiping your skin roughly to hide the fact that your cheeks are flushed from crying.
"Just... a little headache. The light in the kitchen was bothering me."
Jung kook doesn't move from the doorway yet, he leans his forearm against the jamb as he continues watching you with a heavy, unreadable gaze. He used to be able to read you like an open book.
Used to know the exact difference between a cry of frustration and a cry of sadness. Tonight, he just looks confused, like he's trying to decipher a language he hasn't spoken in years.
"Your eyes are really red," he says softly. He takes one step into the bathroom, his hand lifting slightly as if to reach for your face, but he catches himself.
His fingers curl into a loose fist, dropping back to his side. The hesitation is louder than any words he could say. "Did you throw up? I thought I heard..."
"No," you lie, your voice trembling. "I'm just tired, Jung kook. Really tired." He swallows, his throat bobbing. He looks down at his own slippers, then back at you, a profound, exhausting sadness pulling at the corners of his mouth.
"Okay," he murmurs. "There's some medicine in the kitchen cabinet if you need it. I'm... I'm going to go finish up in the studio. Don't wait up for me." He mumbles before turning to walk away. He doesn't close the door behind him, but leaves you standing alone in the bright, clinical light of the bathroom, the echo of his footsteps fading down the hall.
The next morning arrives in shades of gray. A soft, persistent Seoul rain is tapping against the floor-to-ceiling windows of the living room, casting a dim, melancholic light over the apartment. By the time you wake up, Jung kook's side of the bed is already cold. It's a Friday, which means he has an early production meeting at the label.
There is no note on the nightstand. No text on your phone. Just an empty glass in the sink and the faint scent of his cologne lingering in the hallway.
You spend the morning in a daze, only managing to keep down a piece of buttered toast, something you always had whilst feeling unwell. Your hands rest protectively over your stomach, the reality of the situation is settling into your bones like ice, adding up the weeks in your head, you are five weeks along, maybe six.
A tiny, miraculous life is beginning to form inside you, completely oblivious to the fact that the home it's being born into is structurally compromised.
At 11:00 AM, you can't take the confinement of the apartment anymore. You put on a long trench coat before pulling a cap low over your eyes, and call a taxi to a small, private OBGYN clinic on the outskirts of Hanman-dong, a place known for its discretion with high-profile clients.
The waiting room is a sort of torture, you sit in a plush leather chair, your eyes burning as you watch the other couples. A young husband, dressed in a sharp business suit, is sitting close to his wife, his hand resting gently on her swollen stomach while they whisper and laugh over something on his phone.
Across from them, another man is carefully opening a bottle of water for his pregnant partner, his eyes full of a fierce, protective devotion. You look down at your own lap. Your fingers are bare-you stopped wearing your diamond wedding band a month ago because it felt too heavy, replacing it with just the simple silver band that matched his.
When the nurse finally calls your name, you walk into the examination room alone. The doctor is a kind, middle-aged woman with gentle hands. She doesn't ask why your husband isn't there, though she recognizes your name on the chart. She applies the cold gel to your abdomen, the monitor humming to life in the darkened room.
"There," the doctor whispers, pointing to the screen.
You look up through a sudden blur of hot tears. On the black-and-white monitor, there is a tiny, flickering pixel. A heartbeat. A rhythmic, rapid little flutter that sounds like a galloping horse through the machine's speakers.
"The placement looks perfect," the doctor says, her voice a comforting balm. "The heartbeat is strong.
Around six weeks. You're doing great, Mom." The word Mom hits you like a physical blow. You nod, a choked-back sob caught in your throat, unable to look away from that tiny, beautiful spark of life.
You ask for a printout of the sonogram. She hands it to you-a small, glossy black square-and you fold it carefully, slipping it into the inner pocket of your coat, right against your chest.
When you get back to the apartment, the rain has stopped, leaving the city trapped in a humid, oppressive fog. You spend the afternoon cleaning, scrubbing the kitchen counters until your knuckles are raw, desperate for something to control.
At 7:00 PM, the front door lock clicks. Jung kook walks in looking completely spent. His hair is pushed back with a black headband, his black leather jacket fogged from the mist outside. He drops his keys into the bowl, and for the first time in months, he looks directly at you as he walks into the kitchen.
"Hey," he says quietly. "Hey," you reply, keeping your hands hidden behind the kitchen island. "Are you hungry? I actually made dinner. Genuine dinner."
You try to joke. He pauses, looking at the small table you've set for two. You spent two hours making doeniang jiggę and a spread of small side dishes-the comfort food his mother used to make him when he was a trainee.
The rich, savory aroma fills the kitchen, Jung kook's expression softens, a flicker of profound guilt washing over his face. He rubs the back of his neck, a nervous habit he's had since he was fifteen. "Y/ N... you didn't have to do that."
“I wanted to," you say, your voice steadier than you feel. "We need to eat, Jungkook. Together. Just for one night." He looks at you for a long moment, his dark eyes searching your face. There is a deep, exhaustion-born vulnerability in him tonight that makes him look younger, less like the global pop star and more like the boy you fell in love with five years ago.
"Okay," he says softly. "Let me just wash my hands." The dinner is an exercise in heartbreaking formality.
Jung kook eats quietly, praising the food with polite, careful words. "The broth is really good." and "The radish is perfectly cooked." Every compliment feels like a knife turning in your ribs. You don't want a food critic, you want your husband.
You watch him chew, watching the way the light catches the silver ring on his finger-the ring that matches yours. "Jung kook," you say softly, setting your chopsticks down. He stops, his eyes lifting to yours. "Yeah?" He voices.
"Look at me."
He blinks, a sudden, defensive tension tightening his jaw. He sets his spoon down, his hands resting on either side of his bowl. He doesn't look away, but his gaze is incredibly heavy, full of a quiet, dreadful anticipation. "I'm looking at you, Y/N."
"Where did you go?" your voice is barely a whisper, but it cuts through the quiet room like a blade.
Jung kook doesn't flinch. He just sighs, a long, deflating sound that seems to empty the air from his lungs. He leans back in his chair, his eyes dropping to the wooden grain of the table. "I'm right here. I've just been working so hard on this upcoming release, the stress is-"
"Don't lie to me," you interrupt, your voice cracking.
"Please. Don't use the company or the album as an excuse anymore. You've had comebacks before, Jung kook. You've done stadium tours where you didn't sleep for days, and you still looked at me like you loved me. You still held my hand. You still came home to me."
A heavy, suffocating silence falls over the kitchen, the steam from the stew between you slowly dissipates into the cool air.
Jung kook closes his eyes.
When he opens them, the polite mask is completely gone, replaced by a raw, bleeding honesty that makes your breath catch in your throat. He looks so incredibly tired—not physically, but emotionally bankrupt. "What do you want me to say, Y/N?" he asks, his voice dropping into a flat, agonizingly quiet register.
"I want the truth," you weep, the first tear spilling over your cheek. "I want you to tell me why you treat me like a stranger. I want you to tell me why you shrink away when I touch you."
Jung kook looks at his hands, his fingers tracing the edge of the table. He stays silent for so long that you think he's going to get up and walk away. But then, he lets out a shuddering, broken breath.
"Because I feel like a liar every time I touch you," he confesses softly. The words hang in the air, lethal and absolute. "What?" you choke out.
Jung kook finally looks up, and his eyes are bright with unshed, frustrated tears. He looks miserable.
"I'm sorry," he whispers, his voice trembling. "I'm so sorry, Y/N. I've been trying." He pauses before continuing.
"For the last six months, I swear to God, I've been trying so hard to find it again. I stay up at night staring at you while you're sleeping, forcing myself to remember how I used to feel, praying that when I wake up in the morning, it'll be back."
He hits his fist weakly against his own thigh, a gesture of pure, helpless frustration. "But it's not there," he chokes out, a single tear escaping his eye and tracing down his cheek. "I look at you, and I know you're perfect. I know you're the best thing that ever happened to me. You haven't done a single thing wrong. But I feel... nothing. I'm just numb. And the harder I try to force myself to feel it, the emptier I get."
"I hate myself for it," he whispers, his voice cracking completely as he covers his face with both hands, his broad shoulders shaking. "I hate myself so much because you deserve someone who worships you.
And I'm just... I'm just hollow."
Your world doesn't crash down with a bang. It ends with the quiet, agonizing sound of his muffled sobs.
You sit there, completely frozen, your heart shattering into a thousand jagged pieces.
He has just simply, tragically, run out of love for you.
He has chosen his words with a devastating, mature wisdom—he isn't blaming you, he isn't making excuses. He is just admitting his own emotional death.
"So..." you start, your voice sounding like dry paper.
"What are we doing, Jung kook? Why are we still here?" Jung kook lowers his hands, his face pale and stained with tears. He looks at you with a profound, aching pity that hurts worse than hatred.
"I don't know. I didn't want to hurt you. I thought... I thought if I stayed quiet, if I just kept working, it would pass. But it's not passing. It's only getting worse. I think... I think maybe we need some space. I can move into the luxury suite the company keeps near the studio for a few weeks. We can... figure things out."
He's letting go. He's putting his coat on, stepping across the threshold, and preparing to leave you behind. Your hand automatically moves to your coat pocket, where the small, glossy sonogram photo is sitting against your chest.
Your mind is a whirlwind of conflicting, terrifying thoughts. Don't tell him, a voice screams inside you.
Don't trap a man who just told you he feels empty.
Don't make him stay out of guilt.
But then you think of the tiny, galloping heartbeat on the monitor. You think of the three years of promises, the gold foundation you built together.
You owe him the truth, no matter how much it ruins the both of you. Slowly, your fingers slide into the inner pocket of your coat.
"Jung kook," you say, your voice entirely devoid of tears now, replaced by a strange, hollow calm. He stops, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand, looking at you with that dreadful anticipation.
"Yeah?"
You pull your hand out of your pocket. Your fingers are shaking so badly the paper makes a loud, crinkling sound in the quiet kitchen. You reach across the table, sliding the small, black-and-white sonogram photo across the wood, past the bowl of soup, until it stops right in front of his hands.
Jung kook looks down at the paper before frowning slightly as he leans forward to look at the grainy, circular image. His eyes trace the medical text at the top-your name, the date from this morning, the stamp of the clinic. Then, his gaze drops to the center of the image, where the tiny, white pixel is circled in red.
The silence in the room stretches, turning thick and heavy as lead.
You watch his face. You watch the exact second his brain connects the dots. The color completely drains from his cheeks, leaving him a ghostly, stark white. His mouth parts slightly, his chest freezing mid-breath. He looks like a man who has just been struck by lightning, his entire system locking up as the reality of the situation crashes into him.
"Y/N..." he whispers. His voice doesn't even sound like his own anymore. It's completely breathless, terrified, and utterly shattered. He looks up from the paper, his dark eyes wide and trembling as they fix onto yours. "What... what is this?"
'I went to the doctor this morning," you say softly, a fresh tear sliding down your nose. "The heartbeat is strong, Jung kook. It's six weeks."
Jung kook just stares at you, his hands hovering over the table, completely paralyzed, as the ghost of the family he wanted meets the reality of the marriage he was trying to leave behind.
to be continued…
40+ comments for part three (omg thanks for the support! love u all!!!!!!!)
Genre: childhood best friends to enemies to lovers!AU, werewolf!AU
Warnings: Kook is kinda cold at first, it is implied that OC gets sold into a forced marriage where she will be tortured and assaulted (not to Kook but a villain character hahaha), yeah...her future is not looking good, or is it?, Koo might have a plan :----)
Kinks: the trope of "just the tip" and "we shouldn't be doing this", yeah besties i went there, sex in a shed in the forest, sex by the bonfire, nudity, naked cuddling for warmth *wink wink*, he is bigger and stronger than her, size & muscle & strength kink, he pins her down, fuck i'm literally so small when it comes to him like bro please i have so many thots, hahah sorry i'm really into him haahah, he pins her wrists & puts his hand over her mouth to silence her, huge werwolf dick, knotting, multiple orgasms for both, "just the tip" in spooning position, clit massages, rough penetrative sex in pronebone & doggy style, he has her in a headlock at one point, breeding for the sake of scent marking her, so much fucking cum oh lord, dirty talk, he has fangs, he bites her shoulder, he growls, what if i was weak?? what then??, tears, eye contact, this is emotional & has plot and i wanna write more about them, cuddly & safe aftercare, the plot in this is so good omfg
Wordcount: 11.5k
a/n: Click here if you wanna see his dick. I have zero (0) Z E R O knowledge of the workings of the omegaverse. i know that there’s alphas and betas and omegas but that’s it. and that there is heat and knots and slick and scenting(?) but how the dynamics work or what ABO each means? no clue. so if this is inaccurate, bear with me and let's see it as my interpretation of werwolves instead. Okay? Okay. Jjssjjs i also added this idea to the mix ps: i actually don't wanna talk about this, i need to recover first BRO GOODBYE this was kinktober 2024 besties FJJDF what a way to end it tbfh
The storm caught you by surprise. You wouldn’t particularly mind it if it wasn’t for the company you have to keep.
Jeon Jungkook. A stubborn, self-centred peacock of a man who thinks he is something just because he is the son of the alpha.
Now, to perhaps understand the situation a little better, one might need what the literary world calls backstory.
You lived in a small mountain town far away from any big human city. The town was surrounded by high walls and visitors rarely found their way to it. It was wanted by the townspeople because you weren’t particularly human. Most humans would call you demons, but you like to call yourselves werewolves. You lived in a pack and the town was your lair.
You can be human but also turn into a wolf by choice. Some choose to keep some of their wolfish features such as their golden eyes or sharp fangs, while others looked entirely human when they walked on two legs.
Jeon Jungkook was the son of the pack alpha and therefore heir of the title. His mother was an alpha as well, which naturally gave him the alpha gen. He was stronger and faster than the other wolves in the pack and he had control over his body during the full moon. He never hid his fangs and showed his golden eyes whenever he was provoked. He earned his pack tattoos when he was twelve after killing three enemy wolves and when he turned eighteen, he earned the pack piercings after fulfilling the maturity rituals within a day. Something only his father managed to do before him.
Ever since that day, Jungkook became even more obnoxious and unlikable than he already was.
You weren’t so lucky. Born as an omega into a normal family with normal siblings in a normal house, your life has been pretty…normal. You are the same age as Jungkook, which naturally made you go to the same classes from elementary to high school. And throughout your academic career, you never learned to like him.
He was an alpha while you were an omega. You were the only one like this from your family, but they never treated you differently. You were a beloved and cherished family member and therefore lived a normal life until your older brother made a mistake and you had to carry the consequences.
He killed the promised omega wife of the enemy’s alpha’s son. The warring alpha wanted to slaughter the entire town at first, but Jungkook’s father persuaded him to take revenge another way. Take one of the village’s omegas and marry her to his son. “She will be complacent and quiet. Once she is married, she will be your property. You can take out your anger on her.” So Jungkook’s father told him and the enemy alpha agreed happily. One night later, you were dragged from your home with no way to escape your future. You were born this way, it wasn’t your fault and now it would be your death sentence. You cursed your brother that night who begged to be taken in your stead. You told him to choke on it. It was the last thing you said to him and probably will ever say to him. You already started to regret it.
Jungkook was ordered to make sure that you would arrive at the enemy village safe and sound. It has been three days ever since that night and all your hatred for anyone and anything has been directed solely at him.
“The rain’s annoying me. Let’s take shelter”, Jungkook says dryly.
“No.”
Jungkook glares at you.
“Yes”, he hisses, grabbing your arm by your elbow to drag you to a shed nearby. “I’m not gonna walk in the rain. Besides, it’s late. We need to rest.”
“Let go of me”, you protest, stumbling after him. There isn’t much that you can do. He is stronger and bigger and because of his status, he naturally has almost instinctive control over your actions. You could fight against these instincts, but it’s a lot easier not to.
“Would you rather get sick in the rain?”
“Maybe, yes. Maybe I’ll get sick enough to die. At least like this, I won’t be sold into torture”, you spit, ripping yourself free from his grasp. Again, all your hatred and anger is directed towards him, so it is easy to fight your instincts right now.
Jungkook gawks at you in surprise.
“I mean it”, you insist.
He frowns. He steps close and lifts you off the ground, throwing you over his shoulder.
“Hey! Let me down, you fuck!” you yell, flashing your fangs and kicking around you.
Jungkook merely shoulders you better and walks, frowning deeply.
“You brought this onto yourself.”
“I hate you. I fucking hate you.”
“No, you don’t.”
“Yes, I do. You big, smelling piece of shit.”
Jungkook kicks the shed open and drops you. You stumble in surprise, but catch yourself pretty quickly. You and he are mere inches away, sharing air. The constant lighting cutting the sky illuminates your angry faces. You and Jungkook have your golden eyes out and show off your fangs. Your bodies are steaming as your increased body heats dry the water.
“I’m gonna let it slip because we were classmates, but insult me again and I will make you be quiet. Understood?” he gnarls.
You step closer, making him taste your words.
“Go kiss my ass.”
You turn your back to him and stomp further into the shed.
The shed wasn’t much bigger than ten square meters. There were tools on each wall and some tools scattered around the ground. Clearly it was meant as storage for woodworkers. One corner had neat stacks of wood and on a table, some blankets were stacked in case some of the workers needed to stay the night.
“Great. That’s luxury, isn’t it?” you grumble.
The door slams closed behind you, making you flinch. You don’t look however, wanting to appear stronger than you feel. In truth, you are scared and alone and heartbroken. You are frightened. You are sad. You are afraid. You are helpless and hopeless. And you are only a little bit angry. As you walked, you couldn’t stop crying. You were happy for the rain because it masked the constant tears running down your face and you were happy for the loud thunder masking your sobs.
You are being sold like property to a man who will torture you for sports. All you want is to be home and to be held and to have someone pay for your fucking therapy because, goddamn, you are going to need a hell lot of therapy if you should survive this.
Jungkook is the last person you want to be with right now. He lacks empathy and kindness and has a tendency to impulsive anger. You are waiting for him to hurt you after slamming the door, frozen on the spot.
But it doesn’t come. Instead, he swerves past you to get firewood. You can only watch him, frozen like a scared little girl despite having long moved past your second decade on this cruel earth.
Jungkook uses his claws to ignite the fire by scratching them over a stone. He blows into the amber until it forms flames, then he stands up. He hooks his fingers in his shirt and takes it off.
You gasp and look away. You don’t know what he is going to do but it scares you. Is he going to test you out now? Make sure that the alpha is going to get a good delivery?
“Relax. I need to dry my clothes and I can’t do that on my body. I’ll catch a cold otherwise.”
“Oh.”
Jungkook scoffs and starts unbuckling his belt. You watch his tattooed fingers work. He is wearing heavy silver rings on them. Yep, your people can handle silver without pain. It’s only a myth that it hurts you. Just as garlic being lethal for vampires is a myth. Humans like to tell these tales to sleep better at night.
Jungkook begins taking off his pants, meeting your gawking eyes.
“Stop staring and bring the blankets instead.”
“Oh, uhm. Sorry.”
You instinctively obey.
“Make a bed by the fire. Away from the door.”
You obey again.
Afterwards you lift your head, having to gasp and stare. What? Stare? Why can’t you look away?
He is completely naked, currently hanging up his clothes on a chair. You should want to look away but you can’t. His body is sculpted, his muscles well defined. He currently has his back turned to you. It is so big and broad, contrasting against his small waist. Shit, his legs and butt are so big and sculpted in comparison to it. His back is covered scars. Slashes, bite marks, cuts. Some seem to have dug very deep when fresh.
“Just spit it out”, Jungkook hisses, rolling his shoulders which makes his back muscles shift and flex.
“What?”
“I can feel you staring. Just say what you wanna say.”
“Your back. It’s covered in scars.”
Jungkook touches his own back, tracing the scars he can reach.
“I guess it is.”
“Who did this to you?”
“Too many people to count.”
“What happened to them?”
“The fact that I’m still here and they’re not, should be answer enough. Shouldn’t it?”
You gulp.
Jungkook turns.
You gulp even harder. Look away! You know that no matter how hard you beg your eyes, they won’t look away. It is like they are enchanted.
His pecs are big, clearly sculpted and strong. His stomach is defined, carrying scars as well. But what truly catches your eyes is his cock. Sitting under a dark, masculine bush of pubes, it glistens in the shine of the fire. It is big, even soft, a little tanner than the rest of his skin and sitting against a pair of big, plumb balls made for breeding. So this is what the cock of an alpha looks like. The effect it has on you is embarrassing. You feel slick build up in your holes and saliva collect in your mouth.
“Quit your staring. It’s like you’ve never seen a dick before.”
You shake out of your trance, looking away in embarrassment. Your face feels on fire. Holy fuck, what is wrong with you?
“You have seen dick before, right? Weren’t you and Tae a thing in high school?” he talks as he gets under the blanket.
“Uh, yeah, uh. We were.”
“And knowing Tae, he fucked you. Didn’t he?”
You turn away in embarrassment, rubbing the side of your neck. Of course he did, but Jungkook doesn’t need to know that.
He figures it out instantly however, glancing at your middle when you aren’t looking. Just for a second, nothing more.
“So stop being weird about it”, he says and lies down.
You shrink. Jungkook studies you. You are trembling in your wet, cold clothes. He pities you.
“Get naked and hang your clothes up to dry”, he orders.
You want to move in obedience at first, but then stop. You are too scared to obey instinctively.
“No. Close your eyes.”
Jungkook groans and closes his eyes.
“You’re so stuck up. You should practice being naked in front of other people. I heard that Alpha Urquard likes for his pack to watch wedding nights.”
You bite down tears. Great. Not only will you be assaulted, it will happen in front of god knows how many people. What if you just throw yourself onto one of the sharp tools? It would be a bitch way to go, but it’s better than what will happen to you.
You ogle the pitchfork. Maybe you could do it. Maybe.
“Hey!”
You snap out of it. You whip around, meeting Jungkook’s eyes.
“Hurry up and come here.”
“What?”
“Come here. It’s better than over there.”
You ogle the pitchfork then his darkened face. Did he figure you out?
“I’m not gonna repeat myself. Get out of your wet clothes and come to me.”
“Ple-please close your eyes.”
Jungkook sighs in defeat and obeys. With shaking fingers, you get naked. With trembling knees, you walk to his side. With weak muscles, you get under the blanket next to him. There is only one blanket and you try your fucking hardest not to touch his body in any kind of way. He left you the spot closer by the fire so you were warmer and he could oversee the door.
Jungkook, who senses your presence, opens his eyes. He studies your face, then your body. You have the blanket pulled up to your neck, shivering uncontrollably. Even now, you seem plagued by the cold.
He furrows his brows in distaste and closes the distance. He manages to put his arm around you before your quiet beg freezes him.
“Please don’t hurt me.”
He moves away, studying you in shock. Your eyes are squeezed shut, your fingers are trembling as you grasp the blanket.
“Why would I hurt you?”
The honest confusion in his voice forces you to open your eyes.
The fire casts deep shadows into his face as much as it illuminates other parts of it. His wet hair is drying slowly, sticking to his wrinkled forehead. He is furrowing his brows which explains the wrinkles.
“Why would I hurt you?” he repeats his question with more urgency.
“I don’t know.”
“I was ordered to make sure that you arrive unharmed to Urquard. The last thing I’ll do is hurt you.”
“Please don’t.”
“Please don’t?”
“Don’t make sure that I arrive safely.”
Jungkook blinks in surprise. Such vulnerability isn’t what he expected from the once feisty, rude woman of before. You are tiny in fear, trembling uncontrollably and begging him with greyed, hopeless eyes.
“Don’t be ridiculous. You’re gonna be an alpha’s wife. That’s every omega’s dream”, he snarls, sounding weirdly jealous.
You burst into tears instantly, turning your back to him as you curl into a small ball. You wail loudly, unable to pretend any longer. You don’t want to be married off. You don’t want it.
“No, uh… stop crying. I, I’m ordering you to stop crying”, he panics, hissing his words which only makes you cry harder.
He stares for a while, fumbling with his words. In the end he doesn’t know what to say, turning off his brain to speak from his heart instead.
“Don’t cry, it’s gonna be okay”, he says softly, rubbing your shoulder.
His touch is tender and soothing. You sob despite it or perhaps because of it. It feels so weird to receive because it is nice.
“Hey, it’s okay”, he tells you, draping his arm over you. Like this, your bodies are touching under the blanket. He feels so warm against your skin. “It’s gonna be okay.”
“It’s not gonna be okay. I’m being sold like a pig to a man who likes to watch his daughters in law get raped in front of the entire pack and who will use every second of his life to torture me.” You shrink into yourself. “I just wanna die. I’m so scared.”
“Hey no, don’t say that. Don’t be scared, I’m here.”
“I heard that Urquard killed his first wife by ramming a medal hook into her stomach and hanging her like this. All because she couldn’t give him a child with the alpha gen. Please just kill me, please.”
“I’m not gonna kill you, ___.”
The last time Jungkook said your name, you and he were both eleven and played adventurers in the forest. He celebrated his twelfth birthday two weeks later and another two weeks later, he killed those three wolves and got his tattoos. He stopped playing with you and stopped saying your name. Quite frankly, he stopped playing with any children since that day, saying stuff like “a man wouldn’t play stupid stuff” or “my father says that it’s weak to play” and he became quiet and distant. Maybe he became sadder as well and lonelier.
Your name from his tongue after almost fifteen years forces you to turn in his arms. For just a second, the same innocent and playful boy looks back at you before you blink and come back to reality. His features and eyes are still the same shape and colour but he seemed to have grown into them. His left cheek carries a scar these days and his brows are furrowed more than they are relaxed.
“I’m not gonna kill you, ___. And I’m not gonna let you kill yourself either.”
“So you would rather see me sold to a monster?” You squeeze out tears of anger and frustration. “I hate you so much. You sadistic, heartless piece of shit.”
Jungkook frowns deeper.
“You alphas are all the same. You think just because you are stronger than the rest of us, you can push us around like cattle. We aren’t cattle. We are people, we live normal and good lives. We are nothing special but that’s good. We’re boring and mundane but we love deeply. Unlike you disgusting, selfish alphas who see us as nothing but merchandise.”
“Are you done now?”
“I’ve only started. You are heartless, selfish, self-absorbed, apathetic and a snob. At the spot where your heart once was, a rotten piece of coal is sitting and when you talk, plants die out of spite.”
“Anything else you like to add?”
“You are the worst person to ever exist. You are elitist and stubborn and way too obsessed with status. And you…” Your eyes fill with tears. “...you broke my heart before I even knew what heartbreak was.”
Jungkook’s eyes darken in an unfamiliar emotion. Guilt? Regret? More anger?
“We did everything together until one day, you decided that I wasn’t good enough anymore. For fuck’s sake, we were twelve and you acted like I was embarrassing for doing stuff kids our age were allowed to do.”
“You think that I had a choice?” He finally speaks up and you get a feeling that it was your turn to listen. “I stopped being a kid in my father’s eyes the day I killed those wolves. I didn’t wanna push you away, but father made me.”
“What?”
“I became his heir that day, I sealed my fucking fate. I had to stop playing a-and doing kid’s stuff. He forced me to train day in and out. I had to be the perfect man. I was twelve, for fuck’s sake. I was a fucking kid who wanted to play adventurers in the forest with, with his….with his best friend.”
The silence which follows after his confession is deafening. Fifteen years of hating him. Fifteen years of thinking that he hated you. And all this time, he only acted like this because his father made him. You meet his emotional eyes, feeling emotional yourself.
“I was your best friend?” you whisper.
He nods his head, biting down on his lower lip to stop it from trembling.
“I miss you, ___”, he presses out.
You feel lost for words. You are so shaken in fact that you can’t even find it in you to cry. Fifteen years. Fifteen years of hating him for what he did and wishing for an apology you thought would never come and here it is. His confession. His apology.
“It’s been fifteen years and I still do. I miss you and I’m sorry.” He cups your face, wiping away the remnants of tears. “I’m so sorry.”
You stare. And stare. And stare.
“Please say something”, he whispers.
“I don’t know what to say.”
“Just anything, please.”
“You’re the most selfish piece of shit I have ever seen.”
Jungkook’s face falls in shock. His eyes show how much your words hurt him.
“Why tell me your stupid apology now? Why confess to me now? Knowing that I will be sold into a life of sex slavery and torture?” You hit his chest. “Why tell me now when you literally deliver me to my fucking death? You piece of shit, you’re selfish and cruel and I want you dead.”
“No, you don’t.”
“Yes, I do. You and your entire family and the rest of the pack. Die. All of you just die.”
You hit him with more vigour. More and more and more.
“Enough”, he stops you, pinning your wrists into the ground and with it, rendering you helpless, “stop hitting me, please.”
You spit at his face.
Jungkook flinches back. He sits up and wipes it away.
“What the fuck? You spat at me. Why would you do that?”
“Go to hell and shove your sappy confession up your sadistic ass”, you hiss. You feel no ounce of remorse for what you did.
Jungkook wipes your spit into the blanket and moves quickly. He puts your wrists together and pins them above your head. Before you can spit again, he puts his other hand over your mouth, rending your legs useless as well by slinging one of his muscular legs over yours.
There is no fabric between your bodies. You are skin against skin. Raw and naked and hot. You can feel his dick against you and you know that he can feel your tits against his arm. You are rendered useless, vulnerable to whatever he plans to do to you now that spat at him. You are scared, but you are also droopy. It is that same droopiness you felt when you looked at his naked body. Except stronger and more unbearable. You are hotter and there is slick gathering in your holes. You can barely breathe, but maybe this is because of his hand over your mouth.
“Stop fighting me and listen”, Jungkook talks with his lips close to your face. You can’t stop staring at them. You fight him while your mind goes droopy at the sight of his lips moving. “You can either go to your new life or listen. Are you gonna listen?”
You nod your head.
“Good. I’m gonna pull my hand away now and you won’t spit at my face again. Promise?”
You nod hesitantly.
“Good. I trust your word.”
He pulls his hand away, keeping his arm around you. It lies exactly over your tits, rubbing against your nipples. You know for a fact that he is able to feel it. You curl your fingers, trying so hard not to get affected by his closeness. Or to make a sound for that matter.
“I said this stuff to you because I wanna make it right between us. Your brother fucked up, but what Urquard did in retaliation is crazy and what father allowed is insane. If you want me to, I won’t bring you to him.”
“What? But…your father promised.”
“I don’t care. It’s barbaric that omega trading is still a thing. You are right, you are people not cattle.”
“If he finds out that you refuse, he will disown you.”
“I have a plan for that.”
“Urquard will kill you.”
“That’s why I have a plan.”
“What plan?”
“It’s gonna sound insane.”
“Just tell me please. I don’t wanna be sold.”
“The only way I can free you of this pact is if you get marked by another alpha. You’re unclaimed right now, but if you were to be marked by an alpha other than Urquard’s son, then the pact would be invalid.”
“What do you mean with marked?”
He hesitates.
“Tell me.”
“An alpha would have to put his dick into you.”
“So assault? I would have to be assaulted?”
“Not if you wanted it.”
“Huh?”
“Not if it’s with someone you trust. Someone who’s gonna be careful and gentle and who’s gonna make it nice for you.”
“And who should that be? Last time I checked, I’m not really friends with many…”
Your eyes meet Jungkook’s. He seems shy all of a sudden.
“Oh.”
You gasp for air.
“Oh.”
“I know it’s crazy. I thought of other ways. I’ve been plotting ever since we left town. That’s why I volunteered. To give us time, to give me time to think of something. I thought of lots of stuff, but they all ended in hypothetical death or enslavement of our pack. The only peaceful option was this.”
“You volunteered to bring me?”
He nods his head, “anyone else would have been too scared of or too loyal to my dad. I know you’re scared, but I’m not gonna let anything happen to you.”
“And you thought of this?”
“It’s the only way. We kill Urquard and his sons? Their pack comes after us. We run away? Their pack is gonna punish our pack. We kill everyone? Impossible we’d die and destine our pack to agony. It’s only death and pain u-unless you get marked by an alpha.”
“But I would have to be with you afterwards.”
“Only if you want to. We can pretend, make everyone think that it’s real. You wouldn’t have to be with me ever again.”
“Oh my god, this is insane.”
“I know. I’m sorry. The choice is yours. I promise.”
You study his face. You are still trapped under him, sharing heat. Skin against skin. arm against chest and cock against hip. He is semi hard by now, smearing slick on your skin. The fact that he is affected by this - by you - doesn’t make it easier to stay calm. You are glad for his leg over yours because it forces your legs to be closed and therefore hide the masses of slick having accumulated by now. His hair is still damp, hanging into his face messily. His fingers feel so strong and protective around your wrists. You swear that each time he breathes out and you inhale it, you feel high. You are so attracted to him right now.
Truth be told, you always thought that he was handsome beyond comparison. He has a mesmerizing aura and a captivating smile. His physique is your dream physique and his face often caught your attention in a crowd. You were utterly and insanely attracted to him which made your hatred for him grow deeper. He betrayed you, but he is still haunting your thoughts. It was unbearable until right now.
“I’m scared. I never did it with an alpha before”, you confess, suddenly feeling so vulnerable.
And Jungkook takes that vulnerability, cradling it in his safe palm just as he cradles your cheek the same way. His eyes softened, his voice did too.
“Don’t be scared. I’ll be gentle. I promise”, he almost whispers the words, tracing your brow and temple between cradling your cheek.
“I don’t know you like that.”
“Neither do I you. It’s gonna be a one time thing.”
“I’m scared. I’ve been scared ever since all of this started.”
“Don’t be. I’m here. I won’t let them touch you.”
“But you’ll touch me?” you ask in a whisper, lifting the inner corners of your brows.
Jungkook has a hard time staying calm when you look at him with such puppy eyes.
“If you let me, I will.”
You exhale shakily, squirming under him.
“I’m scared.”
He lets go of your wrists to cradle your other cheek. You lean into the touch, barely wanting to keep your eyes open. Your arms stay in their submissive position naturally.
“Just the tip. That’s all it takes. Just the tip for a few seconds so you take on my scent and then it’ll be over”, he says.
“Just the tip?”
“Yes, just the tip. Nothing more. I promise.”
You are going to do something which you thought never to do. But if it saves your life, you would do anything. Even something as crazy as allow Jungkook to stick his tip into you.
“Okay. Just the tip.”
Jungkook exhales shakily, moving closer for a kiss like it was instinct before he stops himself. You shudder, craving nothing more than what he denies both of you.
“We shouldn’t be doing this”, he breathes.
“What?”
“Kiss.” He lets the word dance over your lips, running his thumb under your lips as his eyes stare. “We shouldn’t.”
“No, we shouldn’t”, you whimper, chasing him.
Moments of craving and yearning where both of you try so hard to kiss the other. But you shouldn’t. Just the tip, nothing more.
“Roll to your side, please”, Jungkook breaks the electric silence, guiding you with his hand on your shoulder until your back faces his chest.
You can see the fire and the rest of the shed like this, but not Jungkook.
“Why like this?”
“If I look at your face, I’ll stick it in completely. I can’t do this to you.”
“Oh.”
Jungkook closes the distance, connecting his hand with your hip. He guides it up your body, travelling along your waist and arm. His touch leaves goosebumps where it goes. His palm is slightly calloused from fighting but incredibly tender in how it touches you. You feel yourself breathe heavier and heavier the longer he touches you.
He reaches your shoulder, closing the last of the distance by lowering his lips to your back.
“Ah”, you let out quietly, tensing up. Your eyes are widened comically big, staring into the bright flames. He is kissing your naked skin. What the fuck.
Jungkook’s eyes are closed in contrast. His head is foggy, but he tries to fight these feelings. You smell so good that it is very difficult to do so.
His hand is still on your shoulder at first but moves to your waist when he guides his kisses to said shoulder.
“Oh god”, you whisper, sighing afterwards.
Jungkook feels droopy from the sound, digging his fingers into the softness of your side. He shouldn’t be doing this. Just the tip. That’s what he said. And yet here he is, kissing your soft skin as if it was his right to do so. He shouldn’t be doing this, but he can’t stop. He traces and holds your side and stomach, telling himself that he only does it to relax you. He kisses every inch of your exposed back and shoulder, telling himself that he only does it to calm you down. When in truth he does all of this because he wants to make it nice for you. And maybe he wants to be a source of tenderness after what you had to go through.
Lies. These are still lies. He fucking does this because he wants to. He fucking does it because he wants to know how it is to touch you. Taehyung talked when you and he were high school sweethearts. Oh, Taehyung talked and Jungkook had to listen and secretly seethe with jealousy. It should be him, he thought back then, he would know how to treat you right.
You had no idea of these thoughts. You still haven’t as you lie here next to the warm fire while Jungkook touches you oh so carefully. You don’t know if you’re allowed to close your eyes. Just the tip, you agreed on. Can you close your eyes for that?
But it feels so good. His lips are soft, while his piercings are hard in contrast. His touch is currently dancing up the middle of your torso slowly. You fight the shivers wanting to run through you.
You lose the fight a moment later when he pulls you against his strong chest and kisses your neck.
You whimper, trembling like crazy. You arch into him, craning your neck to give him more of it. Your heart skips beats under his lips. Jungkook grips the blanket to stop his hand from cradling your tits.
“Fuck, I shouldn’t be doing this”, he presses out under his breath, mouthing at your neck hungrily. “I shouldn’t….do…this.”
He drags his lips to your jawline and sucks. Your eyes close.
You mewl, rolling your hips back into him. His cock slides between your legs, rubbing between your puffy folds. He trembles in shock, gripping your hip to stop your wiggles.
“Don’t do this. Don’t act like this when it is supposed to mean nothing.”
“I’m sorry, I can’t help it.”
“Mhhm I know. You can’t, but I can. I won’t do it again, I’m sorry.”
You swallow your begs, not wanting to appear weak or desperate. It is so difficult not to beg when you have his cock between your legs. Hugged by your folds and exchanging slick. He feels hot and his veins are pulsing desperately. You have never before felt so stupidly horny than you do right now. Quite frankly, he might be forcing you to go into impromptu heat if he keeps being like this.
“Just the tip, yeah? Just the tip”, he whispers as he puts his arm under your head so you have something comfortable to rest on. You practically melt into him, biting back tears. You are being held and it feels so good. So safe and warm.
He kisses your neck and cheek, whispering his words.
“Are you comfortable? Are you ready?”
“Yeah”, you sigh, pushing your hips back.
Jungkook slides his other hand between your bodies, using it to align his cock with your dripping entrance. Just the tip, he reminds himself, nothing more. Don’t be greedy, keep calm. This doesn’t mean anything.
“Last chance”, he says, wanting to stall time so he can calm down.
“I trust you.”
Jungkook bites back his moan, having to take a deep breath before he can act. You are messing him up without knowing. With a racing pulse, he applies pressure on your puffy cunt and slips inside.
You squeak, shaking against your will. You convulse around him, gasping repeatedly. He went in so easily, despite his size.
Jungkook growls, “fuck, holy fuck”, he gets out and bruises your hip as he grips it for support. It takes everything inside him not to push it all the way in. Jungkook genuinely has a hard time not to moan. You are so wet.
Judging from your tremors and the way you fight for air, it is just as difficult for you.
“Only a few more second”, he forces his voice to sound as normal as possible. He wants to fuck you, but knows that he shouldn’t.
“Mh-hm”, you squeak out, nodding your head. You want him to fuck you.
Jungkook closes his hand to a fist, growing his claws to dig them into his own palm. The pain keeps him from acting up. He wouldn’t be able to handle it otherwise.
Jungkook always hoped that he would marry you one day. There it is. It’s out there. Jungkook had feelings for you for decades. In his dreams, you marry him and he can spend the rest of his days spoiling you rotten. He would be your protector against any danger, your best friend to laugh with, your remedy for your heats and the lover you can be yourself with.
Being with you like this is everything he ever wished for. You are so soft and warm around him, your slick is so wet. He knows that, deeper inside, it would be so much more. You'd be so warm, so soft. Jungkook gulps down his desire for more, otherwise he would do things he would regret.
“I think it should be good”, he presses out. He can’t do it anymore. One more second and he would push in all the way. He can’t do this to you. You trust him and he can’t abuse this trust.
“Really?”
You turn your head, looking up at him in droopy devotion. Jungkook whimpers, instantly cradling your cheek. He furrows his brows, throbbing inside you. He fights the urge to kiss you, to rest his forehead against yours, to bury himself deep inside you.
“Please don’t look at me.”
“Jungkook.”
His name hasn’t rolled off your tongue ever since he left you at the playground. It almost brings tears to his eyes, forcing his arm around you tighter.
“I can’t do this”, he drops his forehead against yours “I think I remembered that I need to put in all of it. It’s not gonna work otherwise.”
He is lying, because he can’t accept the truth yet. That he is selfish and totally addicted to you.
“Please do.”
“No. No we shouldn’t be doing this”, he fights it still, shaking his head which makes his nose rub against yours.
“Please”, your words tickle his lips, “save me. Whatever it takes, save me.”
“Urgh”, he growls through gritted teeth.
“Please.”
Jungkook lifts his head. He wants to look into your eyes as he does it. He wants to see the utter bliss in your eyes as he turns your relationship status from ex childhood best friends to two adults reunited.
He rolls his hips, feeding your warmth his length inch by inch. Your brows furrow and lift, your lids flutter, your mouth falls open.
“A-ah”, you squeak out.
“Shhh, it’s okay. I’m here. I’m all here”, he whispers. He closes his arm around you, cradling you in a gentle headlock.
You close your fingers around his lower arm, spilling tears from your eyes.
“Does it hurt?”
You shake your head.
“But?”
“So…filled out. So big.”
“I know. I’m big, but you’re taking me so well.”
You whimper. Jungkook feels so insanely protective over you right now.
“Yes, you are. Taking me so well”, he insists, brushing the back of his hand down your cheek.
Jungkook continues until he bottoms out. He shudders, choking down a whimper. You feel so good. He never ever felt like this before. It feels like coming home which is insane because he was never with you like this.
“___”, your name comes out of him against his will.
“Jungkook”, you answer him, clenching around him.
“Stay still, please.”
“Okay”, you whimper, looking at his lips.
The pull is magnetic. Jungkook draws closer with parted lips, you meet him with parted lips. Once you kiss, it will be over for you and him. There will be no coming back from this.
“No”, he croaks, putting his hand over your mouth. The headlock tightens like this, giving you such a sense of being protected that your walls clench against your will.
“We shouldn’t kiss. Never”, he rasps weakly, mouthing at his own hand right where your lips lie beneath. You close your eyes, trying to move your lips under his hand. It is starting to feel cruel to be denied his kiss. Especially when memories of your past come back to you.
You remember that it was a group of eight kids and you were doing “dares” to see who is the coolest. Taehyung was dared to prank call his mom and he actually did. He pretended to be a grown up insurance clerk and once he hung up, you really thought that he managed to prank his mom (he didn’t hide his phone number and had a childlike voice). Jimin, another friend, was dared to climb a tree. Which he did and he was sooo cool for it. They were silly, childish dares who did no harm but made you feel so cool. Then it came to you and you were dared to kiss Jungkook. Which you did. In a childlike, innocent way but which made you and him feel so grown up for a moment.
The memory is haunting you right now, making you want to redo it in a grown up, mature way. You open your eyes, meeting Jungkook’s gaze. Judging from the foggy desperation in them, he is haunted by the same memory.
“Please get out of my head”, he gets out.
You whimper his name behind his hand. Jungkook furrows his brows, grinding his teeth.
“No please. Stop it”, he croaks, squeezing his eyes shut.
You want to fight it as well, of course you do. You swore to hate him forever and now you want nothing else than his kiss. You want to fight it, but your hands move against your will. They rest themselves over Jungkook’s hand and try to dig between your face and his palm.
He growls, huffing out air. The only thing keeping your hips from joining the impossible fight is his hand on it. Shit, now he is concentrating on down below. Your puffy walls around him, so soft and warm. Being inside you, Jungkook swears he will never be cold again. Or maybe he will be, maybe he will never find warmth again once this stops, once he has to slip out and pretend that it meant nothing.
What will happen afterwards? He is so needy and he knows that you are too. What will happen? Are you going to lie next to each other, wet and needy and force your bodies to calm down? Or maybe he will need to excuse himself to outside, fuck his own fist as the loud thunder masks his desperate moans while inside the shed you most definitely would touch yourself as well?
Jungkook was so lost in his haunted thoughts that he realises too late that you managed to tug his hand away. Your lips brush his’.
Jungkook moans from the bottom of his heart, going in for more at first. He even rolls his hips into you. Like instinct. Like it is meant to happen.
“No”, he pushes you away, slips out, breaks the moment. “We shouldn’t be doing this. Not that far.”
You sob, shrinking into yourself.
“Please”, you whimper your words, staring at him with desperate, sad eyes. You lift your hips, begging him silently.
“I won’t be able to stop if I do it again. I can’t do this to you.”
“Please”, you beg.
“Do you even know what an alpha does when he fucks? I won’t be able to stop until I bred you. I-I’ll knot you and, and you won’t be able to get me out until I’m soft again.”
“I know.”
“This could take hours. You will feel out of control and vulnerable.”
“You said that you will protect me. That I-I’m safe with you.”
“___”, he chokes out and crawls to you. He picks you up in his strong arms, holding you against his chest. His heart is racing like crazy against your back. “Stop me. I beg you. I can’t pretend any longer that this means nothing to me. You have to stop this.”
You reach up and twist his hair, pulling him down to you.
“We shouldn’t-”
You silence him with a kiss.
Jungkook trembles, resting his weight against you as the kiss renders his body useless for a moment. You are kissing him. You stopped this stupid farce for you and him. You sealed your fates. Jungkook knows that it won’t be the same after tonight. He will never fucking give you up.
He breaks the kiss, but stay close.
“You shouldn’t have done this.”
“Please. More.”
“Are you even hearing me?” he hisses.
“Yes. Please, more.”
“Fuck, we really shouldn’t, but maybe I…I have to move it a few times? To really mark you?”
“Yes, sounds good, mark me please. I don’t wanna be sold.”
“I-I’ll do it just for that. To make sure.”
“Yes. Okay”, you sigh and melt into him, lifting your leg.
Jungkook slides his hand under it instantly.
“Let me do it. Relax.”
You let your muscles relax, allowing him to carry your leg’s weight. He does it so easily, tracing your hairline with his fingertips as he looks down at you. He moves his hips so his cock would slip between your folds, working you up to what was coming by grinding back and forth. He really drags out the movements, sending trembles through your legs each time his thick tip rubs your swollen clit.
He exhales shakily, whispering his thoughts.
“You’re so wet. I have never felt slick so warm and, and wet before.”
You look up at him with shy, nervous puppy eyes, making him want to protect you forever.
“Is it bad?”
“No, fuck no”, he puts his arm around your chest, pulling you up to him until he can rest his forehead against yours. “It’s perfect, baby.”
“Baby?”
“I…” he drops you, hips stilling in shock. He doesn’t know what to say. Anything he could say feels like too little of an apology.
You however increase the lethalness of your puppy eyes, reaching down to try and move his hips again.
“Please. More.”
“We’re only doing this to save you, right?” He asks, picking up a rhythm again. It is the same as before but way more arousing because he purposefully makes sure that his tip slips into you every now and then. He starts off with just a little poke, increasing the inches more and more. But it stays just the tip, for now, don’t be mistaken. If he slips inside it should happen accidentally. He likes to tell himself if it happens like this, it will mean that it wasn’t his fault.
“Yes, only to save me” you lull your words, getting droopier and droopier. Each time he has his tip inside you, it feels so good. Before he slips out and you feel sad, until of course he drags his cock over your clit instead.
You can’t do this for long anymore and Jungkook seems to share your feelings. The tip he buries in you starts to go way past your entrance and it seems to stay longer inside. His golden eyes never break contact, his fingers rub your arm as he holds you so close.
He slips into you again. So deep.
“Mhhhhm” he lets out in a rumble, furrowing his brows.
You whimper, lifting your brows.
Deeper. Deeper. Deeper. He won’t be able to escape like this.
Deeper.
He bottoms out.
You moan, eyelids fluttering and lips chasing his kiss.
He shakes his head, talking as he falls into the kiss.
“We really shouldn’t be doing this.”
You kiss and Jungkook’s cock doesn’t leave you again. It stays buried deep inside you, reshaping your walls as his hips move. Slowly for now, daring not to be too rough with you. Because being rough makes it real. Maybe if he keeps his movements tiny enough, it will still count as being nothing of importance.
Because that’s what this is, right? Something that doesn’t mean anything, something that won’t change who you and he are. This is what those needy, hungry tongue kisses mean, this is what the desperate touches mean, this is what the exchanging of warm slick means. Nothing. Because if those things meant something, it would force Jungkook to admit that he is doing This for himself. Of course he does it to save you, but if it meant something, he would have to admit that he is also doing this for himself.
But it doesn’t mean anything, right? Right?
You break the kiss for air, looking up at him submissively and droopy.
“It feels so good”, you whisper.
“Close your eyes, please.”
You obey and Jungkook has to come to the realisation that it makes no difference. This fucking means something. Holy fuck, he is done for.
“Maybe I have to make you cum?”
“What?” you ask, eyes still closed.
“I think I need to make you cum once. Then you’ll be marked.”
“Please do. I trust you.”
Trust. He thought that he would never earn it again and yet here he is. With your weakened, trembling body in his hold as you trust him to take good care of you.
“Mhhm shit”, he presses out, biting down on his own tongue to calm himself. Be tender with her, he thinks, you swore to be a gentle alpha so fucking get it together.
He moves you into another position, draping your leg over his hip so you wouldn’t have to use your muscles. You are so open and spread like this, allowing his big cock entrance. He slides his hand to your clit and takes it between his thumb and middle finger to massage it.
“A-ha”, you let out, arching your back and lifting your hips.
“Ssssh, relax. I’m here.”
“Please, deeper.”
Jungkook buries his cock deep inside you and stays there, circling his hips. He is so big and long that he stimulates both your g-spot and your cervix. He is so gentle that it doesn’t hurt. It just feels so good that your fangs grow against your will and you leak masses of new slick.
“Like this? Am I making it nice for you?”
“So nice”, you mewl, nodding your head vigorously.
Jungkook is gazing at you as it happens. He watches every change of expression on your face, fighting the urge to call you beautiful. Because that’s what you are. Beautiful. You would deserve to know but he is scared of the consequences. It would mean the fluttering of his heart is real.
“Is so nice”, you sigh, writhing happily. It breaks him.
“You’re beautiful”, he says, moaning softly when you tighten and arch your back. So you liked it. His cock throbs inside you, leaking into you needily. “Yeah that’s right, you’re beautiful. So fucking beautiful. Taking me so well, feeling so good on my cock.”
“Ah, aaaah”, your moans are so loud, your pussy so fucking wet and your clit so swollen.
Jungkook fucks you gently, massaging your spot of pleasure with his long, skilled fingers. He can feel your heartbeat in your back, as much as he can feel you rub against his nipples.
The blanket over your bodies is so hot, making you and him sweat wherever you are touching. He can’t deny it anymore that this is real, that this means something. This means fucking everything to him.
“You’re such a good omega, taking me so well.”
“You’re making me cum”, you croak, grasping his arm for support, “please, can I cum?”
“Yes, baby. You can. Cum for me.”
“Jungkook”, you gasp, ripping your eyes open to stare in shock as his gentle touches bring you over the edge.
Your eyes flicker golden, you moan silently with an open mouth.
“That’s it, cum for your alpha. Let me mark you, that’s it.”
He has a hard time saying these words to you. His thoughts are running wild. This is the face you make when you have an orgasm. Never in his wildest dreams could he have imagined this to be a face he gets to see. And it’s so beautiful that he treads the moment your high stops and he has to pull out. He doesn’t want to pull out. He needs more of you. He needs you like fucking crazy.
“More please”, and then your beg releases him. You are down from your high, yet still so hungry for more. You feel so fulfilled with him that you don’t want this to stop.
“What?” he croaks.
“More please, more.”
“If I do this, I won’t stop until I cum too.”
“I know.”
“Maybe you’re right. Maybe I have to cum inside you to mark you?”
“Yeah, maybe.”
The pretend continues. The fucking charades that this is only to save you from your fate, that you and he aren’t doing this because it feels so good to both of you.
“Please Jungkook, fuck me properly.”
“Are you sure?” he almost squeaks the words because he has such a hard time controlling his urges.
“Yes. Please.”
“Holy fuck. ___ urgh.”
Your needy beg does the rest. His animalistic instincts take over.
Jungkook growls, grabbing you roughly to flip you onto your stomach and therefore pin you down. He straddles you from behind. His right hand slips to the back of your head, his left hand has a possessive grip on your hip. His legs cage in your legs, keeping them squeezed together as he drills his thick cock into your pussy. You are so tight like this, jerking him off in such a maddening way.
You scream up as you didn’t expect him to take on such a punishing pace instantly, but you aren’t complaining. It feels so good to take him. He fucks you so well. His cock is so filling, making you feel whole.
“I’m not holding back now. For you, just for you. Is this good for you? Do you like this?”, he growls through gritted fangs, shifting his eyes between your face and his cock.
“Yeaa”, you sob, clawing at the ground helplessly. You were aware that Jungkook has been an adult for years, but this is still changing how you see him. Whenever you thought of him, you saw that twelve year old boy calling you immature for playing. That boy is gone as if he never existed. Jungkook is a fucking adult and he is rewriting the image in your mind one heavy stroke at a time.
“You should have never seen me like this. Fuck, this shouldn’t happen”, Jungkook spits, high on your body. He is embarrassed by his actions, but can’t stop them. “But I can’t stop. Holy fuck, I need you so fucking bad.” He needs to fuck you. You are so small and weak right now, so goddamn vulnerable. Once so unclaimed until he took you.
You are his.
Jungkook growls, pinning you harder into the ground.
You are his.
You reach behind yourself because his hand on your head hurts. He grabs your wrist instantly, using it to pin your arm against your back. You wail up, kicking the ground as best as possible as you writhe in your imprisonment.
“I’m sorry. You shouldn’t see me like this. Not you. I’m sorry.”
He apologises, knowing that he won’t be able to stop until you are claimed. The thought makes him crazy. He is claiming you. The girl who was his first kiss, his best friend who always came to him when she needed help, the woman who counts on him to protect her from her fate and the wife he always hoped to have one day. And he is claiming her. He is marking her, making you his for anyone to smell.
Jungkook drills you harder. He pulls out all the way to his tip just to thrust into you sloppily. He does it over and over again, reminding your dripping pussy of his size with each possessive thrust.
And you take it with grateful sobs, existing only for him right now. You would never recover if he stopped right now. You need him to finish what he started even if it ruins you in the process.
“We really shouldn’t be doing this, fuck, this shouldn’t happen”, Jungkook gets out, gawking at where he buries himself in you.
Your slick is slowly taking on a milky colour from the intense friction. It sticks to his veiny shaft and his dark pubes, smearing all over your ass and his thighs as well.
If this shouldn’t happen, why does it feel so good? If this shouldn’t happen, why does it look so hot? If this shouldn’t happen, why does he not want to stop?
Jungkook scrunches his face in anger. He lets go of your arm so he can grip your hips with both hands. He pulls them up until you are kneeling. Your face is still buried in the ground, your back is arched.
You shake and convulse instantly, sobbing in embarrassment because the open position of your legs forces your slick to run out of you.
“Holy fuck”, he gets out, staring at it with blown out pupils, “holy fuck, ___.”
“I’m sorry, please don’t judge me”, you beg, trying so hard to keep it inside with clenches around his cock.
“Never. Holy fuck, I could never.”
“I’m so embarrassed.”
“Don’t be. Relax, baby. Don’t fight it”, he says, knowing that you and he shouldn’t be doing this.
You obey instinctively. You relax around him, releasing the slick you so desperately wanted to hide from him. It begins squirting out of you messily and audibly, marking him yours.
“Yes”, he growls and begins pulling your hips onto his cock possessively, thrusting into you at the same time. He does it with one hand because the other he slips between your legs to pinch your clit. Gently of course, keeping her between two fingers to massage her in circular motions.
“Let me help you.”
You wail and shake, releasing more and more of your pretty slick. It runs down your thighs, covers his legs, smears all over your ass and his stomach.
“Relax, that’s it. My pretty omega shouldn’t keep it inside. It’s not good for you.”
“Jungkook, I can’t do this”, you sob.
“I know. We can’t do this, we never should have.”
“No”, you wail, “no. I have to cum again.”
“Whenever you want to. Your alpha’s right here, baby.”
“Jungkook!” you scream, breaking apart as if you never orgasmed before. It feels so good.
“Holy fuck baby, ah!” Jungkook yelps, hips stuttering in shock, “you feel so good, what the fuck ah! Ah! I can’t control myself. Baby!”
Jungkook growls and lays himself over you. He holds you up with one hand around you, biting down on your shoulder as his body breaks. You sob from the pain of the bite, loving every second of it.
And then it hits you.
His seed.
His thick, hot seed.
It shoots out of him with such strength that you feel punched in the gut. The effect is instant. You lose control over yourself. Quite literally, you lose control. You can still talk, using it to scream his name as you orgasm in a way you have never experienced before.
The first one was intense but familiar. This right now? You didn’t even know that your body could feel this way. It is truly, seriously, religious. It is as if you finally found your purpose in life. And in a sense you did. You found your alpha. He finally claimed you properly. You are his’. You aren’t unclaimed anymore. Nobody ever educated on this, so you have no idea that these religious, soul fulfilling feelings mean that you changed forever, but you don’t mind right now. You are just riding on these feelings, screaming his name and milking him dry.
Jungkook whimpers. He truly, honestly whimpers from the bottom of his heart, collapsing on top of you. He knocks you into the ground like that, burying you under his weight but he couldn’t stop it from happening.
He never experienced this feeling either. He had sex with people, but it never felt like This before. He orgasmed in them but it never felt like this. It feels as if his seed finally has purpose. That’s how it feels. Like his efforts and all the rutting he is doing has fucking purpose.
And then it happens. Something that he was only told could happen to him, finally happens to him. His knot swells. He actually fucking grows a knot and has to writhe on top of you, burying his nose deep in your hair as he sobs your name.
You sob as well, insides suddenly feeling like bursting. His knot is so big and thick that it should feel like an intruder but it doesn’t. It feels like the best drug ever. You didn’t even know that you could stretch this far. The amount of stimulation it gives you as it rubs against your walls is otherworldly, making you chase one orgasm after the other.
“I don’t know what’s happening to me. Ah! ___!” Jungkook yelps, having to orgasm again as your tight walls stimulate his knot. The amount of sensitivity he feels on it is insane.
His hands slide together with yours, holding them tightly as he pins them into the ground. His tears fall into your hair, your own tears soak the blanket.
“I can’t stop”, you get out, shaking in fear, “I can’t stop cumming!”
“Me neither.”
“I’m scared. I’m so scared”, you sob, riding on the unfamiliar, scary sensations.
“Don’t be scared, I’m here. I’m here”, he talks you through it, shaking beyond saving.
You aren’t even moving much. There are no thrusts, no sloppy wiggles. Just and you and him, actually stuck together because of his knot while he pumps one cumshot after the other into you. There is no movement and yet it feels better than the most passionate rutting session you each had. No movement and yet you are fulfilled beyond comparison. Is this how it feels to find your mate? Is this what it is?
Did “we shouldn’t be doing this” turn into the finding of your other half? Was “we shouldn’t be doing this” fate’s way of protecting you from what will happen once you gave in? Or was there ever a “we shouldn’t be doing this” strong enough that could have prevented you from doing this?
Whatever it might be, it is too late to think about the what ifs now. The reality is that you and he can’t stop climaxing, lost in the most addicting and intense pleasure you and he ever found yourselves in. It is never ending. When he climaxes, you have to too which sets him off again, triggering your need to as well. It is a vicious, never ending, orgasmic cycle.
“This feels so good”, he croaks out, writhing on top of you, “does it feel-”
“Yes! Yes! Oh god please Kook not again. Kook!”
“Kook”, Jungkook repeats the nickname in a whimper, curling his toes as another orgasm hits him as well. He never thought to hear this name from you again. He can’t handle it any other way than filling you with more of him.
There is so much of him inside you by now, having no way to escape because of his knot that your body reacts in the only way it knows how to survive. It opens up for his seed to go deeper. It trickles into the deepest parts of your sex organs, warming you from the inside out. It is like he is alive inside you, feeding you with the strongest drug you ever took. You think that you black out for a moment. You are still aware of what is happening to you, but it is hidden behind a thick layer of blurriness.
“Eh”, you let out, falling into the darkness gladly. It feels so good to do. There is something because you are aware of your orgasm, but there is also nothing. It is as if you are standing next to your body, watching it shake and tremble as he makes a home inside you.
And then there is nothing. Truly nothing. No more orgasmic pleasure, no more watching yourself. Just darkness.
“___? Hey, ___? Holy fuck, what’s wrong with you? ___, open your eyes please”, Jungkook’s distraught voice comes closer and closer, his hand on your face becomes clearer and clearer, “please ___, open your eyes, please. Oh god, what have I done? I should never have done this. I- Oh god ___ please, I’m sorry. Wake up, please.”
He shakes your head gently. It brings you back to reality. Your body regains the ability to feel.
“Jungkook”, you whimper, opening your eyes. You writhe instantly, throbbing around his knot happily.
“___ hey. Holy fuck, thank god. Hey”, he says, dropping his forehead against your temple and kissing the side of your face desperately, “I’m so glad that you’re back. I thought that I killed you.”
“No, just made me black out.”
“Why? Does it hurt? Are you in lots of pain?”
“No, just haven’t felt so good before. Ever. Kook, I”, you suddenly have to whimper your words, “I feel your cum inside my uterus. It’s so warm and alive and….right.”
“It is?” He whimpers as well, feeling weakened in emotion.
You nod your head. Jungkook sobs quietly, using the hold he has on your hand to guide your arm under your body and against your chest. Like this, he rolls your bodies to their sides, instantly cradling you against his chest while his trembling lips kiss any part of you that he can reach.
Your face, your neck, your shoulder, your arm, your back and the bite mark he left, your face again. Over and over he kisses each inch of you, whispering your name every now and then as if he is trying to make sure that he remembers who made him feel like this. As if he is trying to make his brain memorise who it was who made him experience his first knot.
He is still swollen, keeping everything inside you safely. It is still so intense, but suddenly it feels more emotionally intense than physically. Enough time must have passed for the fire to reduce the logs by lot. And all of a sudden you and he don’t feel the uncontrollable need to orgasm anymore. You still want to be close, moving your hips in emotionally needy wiggles in hopes of keeping his knot alive for as long as possible, but it is not to chase another orgasm. You want this to last because it feels so safe.
“I don’t know what’s happening to me. I don’t want this to end”, Jungkook confesses, holding you protectively.
“Me neither. I feel so safe like this.”
“Holy fuck, ___. What did we do?” he presses out, kissing your cheek over and over again.
“I don’t know.”
“I never knotted before. I never felt like this. Holy fuck, ___.”
“What is gonna happen to us now?”
“I don’t know. All I know is that I can’t let you go again. Ever. I don’t wanna fucking share you. Never. I’m trying so hard not to tell you that you’re mine ‘cause I promised you that this would never happen again.”
“Please don’t.”
“What?”
You turn your head, leaning deeper into his embrace. Like this, you feel his racing heart against your shoulder and you are entirely protected in his arms. His knotted cock throbs inside you as your eyes meet. The same playful, gentle boy of the past looks back at you, except that his once boyish features are mature and aged up. A gentle, adoring man stares back at you and you can’t seem to find your way out of his galaxy eyes.
“Please don’t promise me that this won’t happen again.” You cradle his cheek. “Don’t hold back on telling me that I’m yours.”
“You don’t know what you’re saying. You’re high from my cum, these aren’t your real feelings.”
“Why shouldn’t they be?”
“___, we-”
You put your thumb on his lips.
“We shouldn’t have done this, I know. You kept telling me as we kept doing this.”
Jungkook gives up in a sigh, having to chuckle afterwards. You giggle, cupping his cheek again.
“Just the tip. That’s what we agreed on. Just the tip”, he says.
You clench around his knot, touching your bloated stomach. You instantly guide his hand to it, wanting him to feel what he did to you. He purrs deeply, biting down on his lower lip. You grin goofily.
“Just the tip indeed.”
He laughs softly. You snicker and stub his nose with your own.
“This is the messiest and deepest tip I have ever given”, he jokes, making you laugh.
“Oh god, this was funny.”
“Mhm, I’m pretty funny”, he says and nuzzles his nose into your neck to tickle you gently.
You squeak and giggle, feeling happy beyond comparison. Jungkook ends his loving attack with kisses to your ear.
You sigh, melting into the affection. You and he lace fingers, using the position to melt closer.
Your droopy eyes stare into the flames while Jungkook relaxes you with soft kisses all over your neck, shoulder and back.
The thunderstorm stopped outside. It is already a little brighter. Fuck, so you were really trapped in this orgasmic state for a few hours. It felt as if so little time passed as it was happening.
“What is gonna happen now?” you whisper.
“Now? We’re gonna cuddle and I’ll be kissing you until you’re asleep.”
“I mean after that. Do we have to show Urquard that I’m claimed?”
“I guess. I haven’t thought that far into the future yet. But yes, he will probably want proof that you’re marked.”
“I’m scared. Do I have to get naked in front of him? And his pack? Will he put something in me to get a scent?”
“He can try if he wants to die.” Jungkook pulls you closer possessively. “You’re under my protection now. Okay? You won’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with and I’ll hunt down anyone who dares to overstep your boundaries. Even Urquard and his pack.”
“Really?”
“Yes, really. I promise you.”
You close your eyes, spilling tears.
“Thank you.”
You never thought it possible to have your dreams fulfilled by Jungkook and yet here you are. You are being held and comforted by Jungkook and it feels like home.
“Don’t thank me. You’re mine. My darling ___ to keep safe. You have my body to protect you and my heart to find a home in.”
There is deep rooted honesty in his words, but you are suddenly too sleepy to ask him what he meant by them. There will still be another time. This wasn’t just a one time thing after all.
Synopsis: in a world where alphas, betas, and omegas live along side modern humans as second class citizens, you've fallen through the cracks of a society that wants to take everything wonderful from you. Luckily a timely encounter with the boys just might save your life.
Genre: a/b/o, omegaverse, angst, hurt/comfort
Pairings: poly ot7 x reader; Sope focused
No schedule for my sanity. I'm just trying to enjoy writing again.
TAGLIST IS CLOSED
Series warnings: bigotry, including internalized bigotry, negative self-talk, neglect, childhood trauma, mentions of SA
A/n: This story will deal with a lot of internalized negativity about and struggles with society. The plot will contain many events and concepts that have numerous analogies to our own society and multiple interpretations are possible. I certainly have my own ideas, but the only agenda I intend to push is one of self-acceptance and love. I'm open to respectful discourse in the comments. Please keep in mind that I and others are very sensitive and if you want to be mean then be mean somewhere else.
Summary - For years, they existed in the space between friendship and love, too close to be platonic, yet never enough to be real. He treated her like she was his in private, only to pull away the moment things became too serious.
The night she finally chose to walk away from the man who once consumed her entire world, she carried something else with her too.
Four years later, a little girl, or fate perhaps—bring them back to each other.
genre : second chance romance, unrequited love (at first), slow burn, accidental pregnancy, Friends → strangers → lovers, angst, fluff
themes : emotionally unavailable! Jungkook , unlabeled relationship, friends with benefits(kind of), fear of commitment, one-sided devotion, accidental pregnancy, absent father (he doesn’t know), girl dad! Jungkook, second chances, yearning, found family, angst with happy ending
⤷ series masterlist ˎˊ˗
In Another Life
The worst thing Jungkook ever said to Y/N happened on an ordinary night. That’s the cruel thing about memories. They don’t warn you.
They were in his kitchen. It was raining outside, the soft tapping against the windows filling the silence between them. Jungkook stood by the stove, stirring noodles lazily. Y/N sat on the counter like she always did, watching him. The scene looked so normal, so familiar.
Jungkook passed her the bowl. “Careful, it’s hot.” Y/N took it quietly. She should have felt comfort. Instead, she felt something tight in her chest. “Jungkook,” she said softly.
He glanced up. “Hmm?”
She hesitated, then asked the question she had been holding inside for months, years.
“What are we?”
Jungkook groaned immediately. “Not this again.”
Y/N’s fingers tightened around the bowl “I’m just asking.”
“You’re overthinking.”
“I’m not.”
“Yes, you are.”
“But we act like... this.”Her voice was quieter now.
Jungkook laughed, a sharp sound. “We don’t act like a couple, if that’s what you mean.”
Y/N stared at him. “You cook for me, you take care of me, we spend nights together.”
Jungkook shook his head as if she was missing the point. “That’s just us.”
“That’s what couples do.”
“No,” he said flatly. “Couples are in love.”
The words settled in the room like something heavy. Y/N’s throat felt dry.
“So you don’t…love me?”
Jungkook looked almost amused. “Y/N. He leaned against the counter. “You’re sweet, tou’re familiar.” The pause felt endless. “But you’re not someone I’d ever actually choose.”
The words landed like glass shattering. Y/N didn’t move. Jungkook kept going, careless. “You’re comfortable, okay? And you’re my best friend. That’s it.”
Silence.
“If I ever wanted you, I would’ve picked you a long time ago.”
Y/N didn’t cry in front of him. She just nodded slowly, as though she understood, as though it made sense. Then she stood up. “I should go.”
Jungkook frowned. “Why are you being dramatic?” He asked, even as his own words made him wince. They sounded stupid, hurtful and careless. Cruel in a way he hadn't intended, yet couldn't take back.
“I’m not.” She grabbed her jacket.
Jungkook sighed. “You’ll come back in a few days anyway,” he mumbled. Not something he meant to say out loud, but something he wished.
Y/N paused at the door. For a second, she almost turned around, almost told him how much he had hurt her. But something inside her had gone strangely quiet. “No,” she said softly. “I won’t.”
And this time, she meant it.
⸻
Jungkook didn’t think before he speak.
He said things that got him out of problems quickly. Not things he meant. Not things he felt. Not things he wanted to say.
Y/N didn’t come to their hangouts anymore. It was always because she was “busy,” or “working,” or “not feeling well.” But deep down, Jungkook remembered that night a little too well.
He had said things he didn’t mean. Things that made his stomach turn the moment they left his mouth because of how cruel they sounded, how harsh, how much of a lie they were.
He remembered the clothes she wore that night. The way her hair was pinned up in a claw clip, the one he had bought her, her earrings, her necklace, the shade of her lip gloss, the blush on her cheeks.
He remembered how nervous she sounded when she asked him. How his heart had been beating too fast. The look on her face when he said those words.
Her face when she got up to leave.How badly he wanted to stop her, to hold her back, to beg her not to leave him, to tell her it was all a lie and that he was just afraid.
But he didn’t.
He could still remember the ache in his chest. The fear that took over him when she said she wouldn’t be coming back anymore. How he broke down after she left.
Y/N collapsed into Jiho’s arms the moment she reach her apartment and saw her standing outside.
She had called earlier, saying she needed her. Jiho knew immediately.
She might not have heard what Jungkook said. She might not have known what the argument had been about this time. But she knew enough.
Y/N hardly ever cried in front of her, in front of anyone. And now she was here, sobbing into her arms, and all Jiho could do was hold her tightly and tell her everything would be okay, even though she wasn’t sure how long that would take.
The others immediately knew something was wrong the next day.
Y/N’s absence, Jungkook barely speaking, Jiho glaring at him from time to time.
But nobody said anything, nobody questioned it.
_______
One night, Y/N’s doorbell rang at almost 11. She wasn’t expecting anybody. Could it be her neighbour trying to share leftovers with her again?
Y/N loved the place she lived. Her apartment. It wasn’t big, it wasn’t much but it was perfect. She loved her neighbours and flatmates. They were like a little family. Y/N came from Suwon, a city near Seoul, where her parents still lived.
She got up and opened the door.
Jiho stood there, with Jaehyun.
She raised an eyebrow, looking at Jaehyun, then Jiho, then Jaehyun again, then Jiho.
“Can we come in?” Jiho asked with a small, sarcastic smile.
“Oh, yeah. Of course.” Y/N stepped aside, shaking away her confusion.
Why was Jaehyun here?
She and Jaehyun weren’t really close. She couldn’t remember ever having a proper conversation with him. He didn’t speak much around her, so she assumed he simply wasn’t comfortable with her, and she never pushed.
They settled into Y/N’s living room.
Jaehyun and Jiho sat on the larger couch beside each other, while Y/N took the single chair, her right leg tucked underneath her.
“I was about to sleep. Any reason you guys are here?” Y/N asked.
“Well, I was already planning to come over and check on you or something, and I saw Jaehyun on my way here, so he just joined me.” Jiho smiled brightly.
“She forced me,” Jaehyun said, rolling his eyes slightly.
“Of course she did.” Y/N laughed.
The conversation drifted from casual to serious in 30mins.
“Yeah, he’s a total bitch. I don’t know if it’s too early to ask, but what did he do to you that night? I just know it was fucked up.” Jiho clenched her jaw.
Y/N and Jiho slipped fully into gossip mode.
Jaehyun took out his phone and pretended to scroll through it, though he was listening to every word.
“Well...” Y/N started nervously. Maybe it was still too early. It had only been a week or two, and her heart still ached.
She glanced at Jaehyun, who looked completely absorbed in his phone. A part of her worried he would report everything back to Jungkook afterward.
“He said something about me not being his... choice?” Y/N wasn’t even sure that was the right way to phrase it.
She remembered it perfectly. Every word, every sentence. The clothes he wore, the way his hair fell messily over his eyes. His scent. The feeling of his touch against her skin. How he avoided eye contact after she asked, ‘What are we?’ How he never looked up once, not even when she was leaving.
She didn’t want to tell Jiho the details. Especially not with Jaehyun definitely listening.
Jiho let out a sad sigh. Then sadness became anger. “Nothing good ever comes out of his mouth. Everything he says is bullshit.”
Y/N laughed softly.
“You should leave him before you lose yourself.” Jaehyun finally spoke, lifting his gaze from his phone.
“I—what?” Y/N's smile slowly faded.
Jiho stared at him with her mouth open. Neither of them had expected Jaehyun to speak.
Especially not about Y/N and Jungkook. Especially not to give advice.
Jaehyun merely shrugged, as though he had said something completely ordinary.
“Did that advice come from personal experience?” Jiho joked.
Y/N was about to laugh too.
Until Jaehyun nodded. “Yeah.”
“Oh.” Y/N immediately covered her mouth.
Jiho awkwardly patted his shoulder “Sorry.” Maybe she was trying to comfort him somehow, maybe she wasn't.
“Thanks…Anyway, it's almost midnight. I should go. Jiho, are you staying?”
“Uh... yeah, I guess so. Get home safe, okay?”
“Thanks for coming over,” Y/N added, standing and walking him to the door.
“Good night.”
“Good night.”
Jaehyun gave her a small smile before leaving. Y/N locked the door and walked back to the living room.
The moment her eyes met Jiho’s, both girls burst into laughter.
Y/N doubled over, clutching her stomach, Jiho nearly slid off the couch.
“I did not expect him—” Jiho couldn’t even finish her sentence before she started wheezing.
Y/N took a deep breath, wiping at the tears gathering in her eyes. “I feel bad for him, though.”
Eventually they calmed down and headed toward Y/N’s room.
The first word out of Jiho’s mouth was “Damn.”
Y/N clicked her tongue, “Girl, it’s not like you haven’t seen a messier place.”
“Yeah, but this is your room.” Jiho gestured dramatically.
“I’ve been feeling tired lately. Nothing serious. I just don’t have the energy to clean.” She picked up a few clothes from the floor to make space.
“How tired are we talking?” Jiho raised an eyebrow while helping.
“Just... tired. And some headaches.”
“You should eat properly and get more rest.”
Both of them climbed into bed. Sleepiness settled over them quickly.
________
Y/N woke up the next morning already irritated. The exhaustion had settled into her bones before she had even opened her eyes, and the blood stain on her shorts and bedsheet did nothing to improve her mood.
“I thought you were keeping track,” Jiho said, watching her friend scrub furiously at the stain as though she were trying to erase the entire morning.
“I did. It just came early... I guess.”
“You should see a doctor. You know, just to be safe.”
“I guess so, but I don’t think it’s really necessary.”
“My aunt found out she had cancer when her period came early for two months and she went to the doctor for a checkup.”
“Wow, thanks, Jiho. That really made me feel relaxed.” Y/N rolled her eyes and shot her friend a look.
“What? I just want you to be safe and healthy.” Jiho pouted, throwing her hands up in defense.
“I’ll go next week. Maybe.” Y/N mumbled it quietly, still convinced it was unnecessary.
_____
Jungkook attended every hangout, every meetup, every party, secretly hoping to see her. But she never showed up.
He would run past her apartment during his nightly runs, pretending it was nothing, pretending it had always been part of his route. He did see her once, only from a distance.
She was taking out the trash. Afterward, she sat down on her porch, doing absolutely nothing. Just sitting there. Jungkook's heart went into chaos. His breathing became uneven, his palms grew damp. It was ridiculous. Why was he nervous? He ran away before she could notice him.
Even though he had spent weeks rehearsing conversations in his head.
What he would say.
What he would do.
How he would apologize.
But when the moment finally arrived, he chickened out and kept running.
Jungkook had never met someone as kind as Y/N. Someone as patient. Someone who felt so real and yet somehow dreamlike at the same time.
He remembered the first time he truly noticed her. They had been classmates for nearly a year, but she had existed only at the edge of his vision. Until one afternoon in math class. He sat behind her that day. The teacher had assigned a worksheet, and Jungkook wasn't particularly good at math.
Y/N wasn't either, except when it came to algebra. Algebra was her thing.
Jungkook scrunched his nose in frustration and let out a long sigh as he attempted the same problem for the fourth time. Then, like some small miracle sent down from heaven, Y/N turned around.
“Need help?” Her voice was soft, low, calm. She wore a small smile that felt warm without trying to be.
Jungkook nodded. “Yeah. Uh, thanks. He pushed his notebook toward her. The funny thing was that his eyes kept drifting toward her face instead of the equation.
Jungkook knew who Y/N was. A classmate, nothing more. They had never spoken before. Never exchanged more than a passing glance.
He knew her name. He knew she seemed easy to talk to. That was it.
He didn't immediately fall for her, but he found her interesting, likeable, fun.
That night, he sent her a follow request on Instagram. And somehow, that was where everything began.
Y/N knew Jungkook well. Or at least as well as anyone could know someone from a distance.
He was rich, popular enough. Always getting into trouble with his friends.
Jungkook hung around all the popular guys. He wasn't as famous as they were, but people knew him. Partly because he was Jungkook. Partly because his older brother had been one of those seniors everyone admired.
Y/N still remembered the excitement she felt when Jungkook walked up to her after school a week after she had helped him with algebra. She remembered how hot her ears became. How she stumbled over her own words when he asked for her number. How she stuttered through each digit.
She never imagined that moment would eventually lead her here.
_________
Jungkook sat on the couch, leaning back with one hand covering his face. Every now and then, a sigh escaped him.
He regretted asking Mingyu that one specific question because now Mingyu seemed determined to turn it into a lifelong lesson.
Jungkook had casually asked, “Is Y/N coming?”
The moment Mingyu mentioned a business meetup. That had been a mistake.
It started with, “Jungkook, this is about us, our business, our future.”
And somehow evolved into, “You had your chances and you fucked them up. You can't screw around and expect her to take you back.”
Jungkook groaned quietly. He rolled another joint and lit it.
“You've been smoking a lot more lately. Jaehyun finally joined the conversation “You might need rehab if you keep this up.”
Without waiting for permission, Jaehyun stole the joint from Jungkook's hand, took a drag, and walked away.
Jungkook smoked a lot. Always had. But when he was around Y/N he tried not to.
Y/N never complained.
Never told him to stop. Never judged him, but he remembered a conversation from high school. He had offered her a cigarette once.
She refused. He asked why. Y/N had simply shrugged. “I don't like the smell. It makes it harder for me to breathe.”
That was all. Such a small answer and yet Jungkook remembered it years later. Funny how the mind worked. It forgot important things.
But held onto moments like that forever.
________
Y/N started worrying. Just a little.
Her “period” had stopped after two days. There had barely been any blood. Normally it lasted five or six days and was heavy enough to annoy her into existence.
She paced back and forth across her kitchen.
What if I have cancer?
What if it's some terminal illness?
What if I only have a few months left?
Her thoughts immediately drifted toward her parents. Should I spend my remaining time with them?
Then her friends. Jiho. What would she even tell her?
Then her dream. A bookstore and a café. She had dreamed about it since she was a child. A small place full of books and coffee and quiet conversations.
Then, inevitably, her thoughts drifted to Jungkook. Would he finally care about me a little if he found out I was dying Maybe it wouldn't be such a bad thing.
The thought arrived quietly and somehow that made it worse.
“What the fuck?” She whispered it to herself. If Jiho could hear her thoughts right now, she would probably slap her across the face.
Y/N sighed. She really needed to see a doctor before her imagination drove her insane.
______
The next day, Y/N went to a clinic to see a gynecologist.
The moment she stepped out of the doctor's office, the world no longer felt entirely real.
That night, Y/N stepped into Jiho's apartment, still unsure whether she should tell her the news. She didn't even know if it was bad news or good news.
Y/N sat in Jiho's room, staring at the floor. “I went to the clinic today,” she began quietly.
Jiho immediately stopped what she was doing and turned all her attention toward her friend.
“You’re not dying, are you?” she asked, her voice laced with worry.
Y/N laughed. “God, no.”
Jiho sat down beside her on the bed “Then you're okay?”
“I am, but there's more to it... I don't know how to say this, Jiho.” Y/N spoke honestly. Her lower lip trembled slightly.
“It's okay. I'm here.” Jiho reached for her hand. She didn't know what to expect.
“Jiho…I'm pregnant.”
The words finally left her mouth after a long silence.
Even now, saying them felt unreal. Like a dream, like something that had happened to somebody else.
“You're sure?” It was a stupid question. But Jiho couldn't believe it either.
Y/N nodded. “Yes.”
Jiho covered her mouth. “Oh my God.” Then she pulled her best friend into a hug.
Y/N finally let out the tears she had been holding back all day. She didn't know if she was happy, sad, terrified or all three at once.
Neither of them said Jungkook's name.
They didn't need to.
⸻
With Jiho's support, Y/N took the train to Suwon the next day. She told her parents after only a few minutes of settling in.
It was the hardest conversation of her life. But they didn't yell at her. They didn't blame her.
Her mother simply held her while she cried. Her father sat quietly for a long time.
Then he said something Y/N would never forget. “You're still our daughter first.”
Y/N was an only child, but she had never been particularly close to her parents.
She had lived away from them since middle school, when she moved to Seoul to attend school and stay with her aunt.
There had never been any conflict between them. No arguments, no resentment. Just distance.
Her mother hadn't been there when she got her first period, or during her first heartbreak.
Her father hadn't been there to protect her when boys from school followed her home, or when she learned how to drive.
It had always been her aunt. And eventually, even her aunt had moved away to the States to live with her husband.
Yet somehow, despite all those years apart, they were still her parents. And the love that existed between them had never disappeared.
It had simply remained unspoken.
⸻
A week later, they made the decision. Y/N would move back into her parents' house.
She could start over. Find a job in Suwon. Build a life there and her parents were willing to help.
She could stay somewhere nobody knew Jungkook. Somewhere nobody knew the story.
Or the mistakes.
⸻
Jiho was the only friend who knew. Y/N had made her promise.
“No one else can know.”
“Not even the boys?” Jiho asked.
Y/N shook her head immediately. “No.”
“And Jungkook?”
The name still felt like a knife.
Y/N's voice barely came out. “Especially not Jungkook.”
Jiho hesitated. “But he should be responsible—”
“I know.” Tears filled Y/N's eyes. “But I can't give him that power. I can't let him back into my life just for him to leave me again. I tried so hard to walk away from him. I can't do it again.”
Jiho wrapped her arms around her tightly. “You won't have to.” Her voice was firm. “I promise.”
⸻
The night before Y/N left town, she took a walk around the city.
Past familiar streets. Past places she used to visit with her friends.
Then she ran into Jungkook. He seemed to be out walking too. The familiar sight made her chest ache.
Both of them stopped.
For a moment, she simply looked at him.
The boy she had loved for years, the boy who had broken her heart, the father of the child she was carrying.
Jungkook spoke first. “Y/N?”
She smiled faintly. “Hi.”
He took a step closer. “Where have you been?”
She shrugged. “Busy.”
Jungkook studied her face carefully. “I heard you're moving to Suwon. Back to your parents.”
“Yeah.” A small pause. “Did Jiho tell you?”
“Jaehyun, actually.” He laughed awkwardly. “I thought I'd be the first to know.”
Y/N laughed too. “He probably heard it from Jiho.”
Jungkook opened his mouth. Then closed it. Then opened it again. Like there was something he desperately wanted to say, something he needed to say.
But instead he only said, “Well... good luck, then.”
Y/N nodded. “Thanks.”
She turned and began walking away. Jungkook watched her leave. Something about it felt wrong. Final. Like a door closing.
But he didn't stop her.
Jungkook didn't know much about love. Not beyond what he had seen from his parents. He wasn't even sure whether what he felt now was love, but if it was, love was painful, messy, terrifying.
⸻
The next morning, Y/N left for Suwon. Jiho cried the moment she hugged her goodbye.
“You better call me every day.”
Y/N smiled. “I will.”
“And I'll visit every other week if I can. Jiho sniffled loudly.
Y/N laughed as she rubbed her back.
“And you better wait for me before delivering that baby. I want to be there.”The threat only made Y/N laugh harder.
⸻
Eunwoo never knew why Y/N left.
Neither did Mingyu, nor Jungkook.
None of them knew what she carried with her.
But Jaehyun knew there had to be a reason. Something she hadn't said aloud, because Jaehyun had been there once. He had walked away from someone too. Not because he stopped loving them, but because he had nearly lost himself, completely. And he knew Y/N had left for a reason. Maybe she had almost lost herself too ir maybe she had left because she had found something worth protecting.
⸻
Y/N's mother stood beside her. “You'll still follow your dreams,” she promised.
The words settled somewhere deep inside Y/N. Like warmth, like reassurance, like something she had wanted from her mother for years.
Jiho and Y/N called almost every day and Jiho visited whenever she could.
The train ride was only thirty minutes. She always brought fruit and every kind of healthy food she could find. Y/N never asked about Jungkook. She didn't want to know.
But at night, she often spoke softly to her baby. One hand resting over the small curve of her stomach. She told her about her friends. About her life. About her first love.
Then she whispered something only the baby could hear. “You're the only part of him I'll ever keep.”
⸻
Jungkook felt reckless. He couldn't sleep. Couldn't eat.
Is this it?
Is this the end?
He wanted one more chance. Just one. A chance to tell Y/N he loved her, a chance to apologize, a chance to undo every cruel thing he had said. But he knew he had already been given too many chances and he had wasted every single one. He felt useless.
His bed felt larger now. Colder.
His house felt empty. Unlived in.
He barely stepped into the kitchen anymore.
Everything reminded him of her.
Her presence, her scent, her laugh, her voice.
He wanted to go to Suwon. It wasn't even far. He wanted to go just to see her one more time. But he didn't have the courage.
He never had.
Eunwoo still texted Y/N occasionally to check on her. He no longer argued with Jungkook. Never lectured him. Never brought Y/N up, because he knew Jungkook was carrying something now. Not love.
Something worse.
Regret.
Mingyu still texted Y/N too, mostly memes. At the same time, he stayed close to Jungkook. Making sure he didn't drink too much, making sure he didn't smoke too much. One night, Jungkook got too high and broke down in Mingyu's arms. Sobbing about how much he regretted everything. How much he missed her.
Jaehyun, on the other hand, never called Y/N. Never texted. But he was happy for her. And he didn't hate Jungkook either. Jungkook was still his friend.
Love was messy. It was never simple. Sometimes it healed people, sometimes it broke them, sometimes it did both at once.
And Jaehyun knew that better than most.
Note : Hii Omg can’t believe this shit didn’t flop. I’m so happy😭. Also I read all your feedbacks, advice, compliments and I wanna thank you all for it. I really appreciate them, keep it coming. Also this chapter is a bit short and it might be moving too fast lmao sorry and thank you all again🫶🏼🫡
Summary - For years, they existed in the space between friendship and love, too close to be platonic, yet never enough to be real. He treated her like she was his in private, only to pull away the moment things became too serious.
The night she finally chose to walk away from the man who once consumed her entire world, she carried something else with her too.
Four years later, a little girl, or fate perhaps—bring them back to each other.
Genre : second chance romance, unrequited love (at first), slow burn, accidental pregnancy, Friends → strangers → lovers, angst, fluff
Themes : emotionally unavailable! Jungkook , unlabeled relationship, friends with benefits(kind of), fear of commitment, one-sided devotion, accidental pregnancy, absent father (he doesn’t know), girl dad! Jungkook, second chances, yearning, found family, angst with happy ending
Chapters :
Chapter1 - The gravity between them.
31.05.26 wc: 4.7k
Chapter2 - In Another Life.
coming 04.06.26
Chapter3 -
Chapter4 -
Chapter5 -
Taglist : Please comment, dm or ask to be in the taglist <3.
Note : Hii! so happy to be back:) How are you guys doing? This story might flop but it is what it is. I hope you all like it.🫶🏼
⤷ after a heartbreaking and devastating breakup, you’ve never truly left jungkook’s mind. never once did he stop thinking about you, wondering who you’ve become and wishing he could have you back. but one night, years later, you unexpectedly meet again. you realize that even in new relationships, you’ve never stopped searching for each other.
— pairing: jungkook x fem. reader
— genre: exes to lovers, angst, and smut
— rating: 18+
— words: 8,042
— warnings: morally grey jk and oc, toxic relationship, heartbreak, breakup scene, crying, swearing, strong language, mention of sex, heated argument, mention of cheating, mention of break up, this is just messy, car sex, riding, unprotected sex, penetrative sex, they are soooo obsessed with each other and way too careless, a tiny bit of teasing, some begging, hickeys, and the ending itself is a damn warning‼️
— author’s note: THIS IS PURE CHAOS!! honestly, i’ve never written so chaotic and toxic at the same time 😅 it’s just that i’ve been wanting to write something different and sad but i can’t write something sad… honestly, i don’t know how i pull this fic but hopefully you’ll enjoy it ❤️
— playlist: glimpse of us
MASTERLIST
The last time Jungkook saw you, you were crying so hard that you couldn’t breathe. His eyes were shining with tears that he was so desperately trying to hold back.
The ache in his heart was suffocating him, and if it was even possible, he could die right there. Seeing you crying because of him was the worst sight he could have ever witnessed. But even if he wanted to close his eyes, he’d still hear your sobs.
Your words were all a blur to him. He couldn’t hear anything besides his trembling heart. But your next words caught his attention.
“You gave up on us,” you said, voice shaking.
He strongly wanted to argue, to say that it wasn’t true, but you’d never understand his perspective. You’d never understand how you deserve so much better than him. He was a fucking mess. His life was a damn mess, and he didn’t know how to pick up the pieces.
The only right thing was to let you go.
You’d be a hundred times happier without him. Any other man could give you what he couldn’t. He wasn’t worthy of your love—he never was.
“You can’t understand,” he managed to say.
“Then, explain,” you said, stepping closer.
That horrific sight of your red eyes, devastated cheeks, and shaky hands would, without any doubt, haunt his nights for the rest of his pathetic life. He hurt the only person he had ever truly loved.
Nonetheless, it was the best option.
“It’s best if we just stop,” he mumbled with uncertainty.
Jungkook never wanted to say those words out loud, but as heartbreaking as it was, it was the right decision. You were always too good for him.
Your entire life was planned and perfect. You always managed to get yourself together, no matter what life threw your way. You were strong, brave, optimistic, and wonderful. Jungkook didn’t fit there.
His life was full of uncertainties. He was completely lost in life and was never able to get his shit together. He’d drown his sorrows in alcohol and cigarettes, thinking they’d solve all his problems. But he simply spiraled even more, dragging you with him.
You didn’t deserve that. You were worthy of all the best in the world. You deserved to be loved like you were the most precious diamond on earth. You deserved to be worshipped like a damn empress. He couldn’t do that.
However, even if he couldn’t give you all that, he’d burn the world down for you. He loved you with his entire soul. You were the first person he truly ever loved.
“Stop?” you screamed. “You already left weeks ago.”
Jungkook flinched, the words hitting harder than he expected.
“There’s nothing left to stop,” you said, anger cracking into hurt. “You already killed us.”
This was the sad truth. He had already destroyed everything you had built over the past two years, and it only took him a couple of weeks.
In that moment, his entire body craved to hold you in his arms one last time, but that was selfish. He couldn’t do that while the tears were ravaging your face.
“I’m done with you, Jungkook,” you added.
Jungkook kept his mouth shut, only nodding as if he agreed, and as if it didn’t break him. His heart was entirely bleeding.
“Okay,” he said.
You became quiet, too quiet, and he hated that. For a moment, you simply stared at each other, hoping one last time that the other would say something to save your relationship. But it was too late. There was nothing left to save.
Without further words, you took your things and walked out of his apartment without slamming the door. You just left in a heavy and soul-crushing silence.
The second you left, Jungkook collapsed onto the floor, pressing his hands into his eyes, finally allowing himself to cry. His tears streamed down his face while his sobs broke the silence of his apartment.
He told himself he did the right thing. He told himself you’d be happier without him. He told himself you’d move on with someone who would treat you right. But none of it made the pain easier. None of it erased the void you left in his heart.
Months later, Jungkook met Mirae.
She was kind, patient, and uncomplicated. She arrived at a moment when things were slowly getting better for him. He was finally getting his things together. She appeared in his life when the huge cloud in his mind slowly disappeared.
He still perfectly remembered the day he met her. They were at the same café—he was there to find a new job, and she was there with her friends. The moment she showed up in front of him, she shone so brightly.
Mirae dared with her friends that she’d be able to get the number of the handsome stranger sitting near the window. She told him about it, and by pure kindness, he gave it to her. He didn’t want to because his heart was still trying to overcome the pain he inflicted on himself.
But she texted him that day. And they never stopped talking.
Being with her felt safe because she didn’t know who he was before. She was the purest soul he had ever met. He knew she’d never judge him if he ever told her what happened in his last relationship or why he left his last girlfriend.
With Mirae, he could finally exist without the fear of failing someone. He never felt like she was too good for him. It simply felt like he was enough for her.
But truth being told, she wasn’t you.
Even if he cared for her, his heart wouldn’t flutter the way it did with you. His world wouldn’t stop when she walked into a room. His lips wouldn’t crave her kisses the way they did for yours.
They sat on the couch, her head resting on his shoulder while they watched a movie she randomly chose. They’d do weekly movie nights at her place. It was their thing. They both loved these nights because they felt right and good.
When the movie ended, she smiled at him, and he couldn’t help but smile back. She was effortlessly beautiful. For a moment, they just stared at each other without saying a word.
“You’re hard to read sometimes, you know?” she said.
“Am I?” he jokingly asked.
She nodded, “Yeah, it’s like you’re hiding a part of yourself.”
And he did. You were a part of him that he would never reveal. You were his biggest secret—at least, towards Mirae. Not knowing about you was for the best.
“And sometimes, it’s like you’re somewhere else.”
“Just thinking,” he said.
But he was actually thinking about you. Thinking about the day you left for good. Thinking about the way you looked so devastated that day. Nothing or nobody could ever erase that heartbreaking image from his mind. That breakup would forever haunt him.
“Let’s pick another movie,” she proposed with the brightest smile.
While she was scrolling through Netflix to select a new movie, his eyes looked at her. Sometimes, he’d notice the resemblances between the two of you. In many aspects, you and she were similar, and deep down, he knew his heart had chosen her because of it.
Once they agreed on the movie, she leaned her head on his shoulder once more. Jungkook then closed his eyes.
For a moment, he imagined it was you. Not because Mirae might look like you, but because he still associated comfort with you. Because a part of him still belonged to you.
Guilt sat heavy in his chest that night. A guilt that almost suffocated him.
Months later, you met Dohwan through mutual friends.
He was steady, gentle, and goofy. He never overthought anything, as if he knew from the start what he wanted, and communication was the key to your relationship. With him, life felt easy and perfect.
Dohwan knew some bits of your past relationship—not everything, but the most important parts. From the very beginning, you explained how important it was for you to communicate. You explained how your last boyfriend gave up on you and how he simply decided on his own to end the relationship.
It should have been perfect with Dohwan. He was everything Jungkook wasn’t. And most importantly, he loved you the way you deserved. Loving him and being loved by him were easy.
One night, while lying in bed after a very hot and steamy moment—or should you say, after he fucked you right—his fingers traced across your belly. “You’re quiet tonight.”
“We just had sex,” you mumbled with a smile.
“Yeah, but before that, you didn’t speak a word,” he explained. “You just threw yourself at me.”
Well, right before going to his place, you bumped into an old friend you hadn’t seen in years. Unfortunately, she didn’t know you weren’t with Jungkook anymore, so obviously, she asked about him. It was hard to tell her that he wasn’t a part of your life anymore.
But after leaving her, your mind was brought back to that horrible night. You saw his stoic face all over again, and you perfectly remembered the look on his face when you left. It was painful.
At that moment, sleeping with Dohwan felt like the only way to erase Jungkook from your mind. However, it had the opposite effect.
The second it stopped, you wished it was him next to you, and not Dohwan. You wished that it were his fingers touching your skin delicately. And that was a horrible feeling.
It didn’t feel fair for Dohwan, who simply loved you.
“I just needed it,” you replied.
He chuckled while still tracing his fingers along your sweaty and burning skin. Your gaze met his, and your chest instantly tightened. He deeply loved you. You could see it in his eyes.
This broke you because you couldn’t love him back with the same intensity. Because your heart belonged to someone else. It belonged to Jungkook, and it will always be like that.
Nobody could ever look at you the way Jungkook did. He’d look at you like you mattered more than anything. He’d look at you like you were the prettiest person on heart. His gaze on you would always take your breath away.
Nobody could ever fill the void Jungkook left in your heart, and that was the most painful part. Because even if you wanted it with all your soul, Dohwan would never be yours. Dohwan would never be the man you want.
Your heart would only beat for one person. Jungkook.
Two years later, you ran into each other in the streets.
Jungkook left the house after an intense fight with Mirae, and you were simply heading back to your place after working extra hours. You were on the phone, too lost in the conversation with your mom, while he was looking back, his hands in his coat’s pockets.
In two years, not once had you crossed paths.
The moment you collided with his strong body, your phone fell on the floor. “For fuck’s sake,” you swore under your breath.
Jungkook completely froze when he heard your voice, thinking he was hallucinating for a second, but when his gaze dropped on your figure, his mind simply stopped working. He couldn’t believe it.
“Yn?” he asked, his eyebrow furrowing.
Then, you stopped in your tracks when you heard the voice that haunted your nights. Was it a dream? Did overworking fry your brain? That couldn’t be possible! It could only be a dream.
However, when your head lifted up, you realized it was real. Jungkook was standing in front of you in the middle of the street.
“Jungkook?” you also said with evident surprise in your voice.
When your eyes met, the air suddenly shifted. The two of you were brought back to years ago. Jungkook couldn’t help but notice how much you had changed. There was something stronger and more confident about you now. You were prettier than before, if it was even possible.
Your ex-boyfriend had changed, too. A lip piercing glinted against his lip, his shoulders broader than you remembered, and his hair cut shorter. But what struck you the most was his outfit—more polished than before, like he finally had everything together. He looked better.
For a moment, the world around you ceased to exist. It was just you and him all over again.
“Darling?”
The sound of your mother’s voice brought you back down, and you grabbed your phone that was still on the floor. Jungkook didn’t say a thing, simply looking at you bend down.
“Let me call you back, mom,” you told her before hanging up.
Your gaze shifted once more to him. A little smile grew on his face, and your heart missed a beat. How could he still be the same while being so different at the same time?
“Hi,” he said softly.
“Hi,” you said while returning the smile.
You stood there as if everything was still the same, as if time hadn’t gone by. A silence settled between you while you both tried to grasp the fact that you were standing in front of each other.
Two years separated this moment from the last memory you shared. It seemed so far away, and still too recent at the same time. It was like you had only broken up yesterday, while the pain had already had time to ease.
“You look good,” he then broke the silence.
“You too,” you replied.
You wished it was a lie, but Jungkook looked better than before, which you didn’t think was possible. He was devastatingly handsome. The suit he was wearing gave him another look. This wasn’t the Jungkook you remembered. It seemed like it was an improved version.
You started talking about what you had become. Jungkook had finally joined his dream company as a lawyer, which explained the very fancy suit. On your side, you had just recently quit your old job and had joined a novel publishing firm as editor.
You also talked about your respective families, catching up on how everyone was doing. However, every sentence said was carefully thought out as if you were stepping on thin ice. Both of you were scared of saying something wrong, and neither of you wanted to ruin this moment.
Nevertheless, your eyes kept drifting and lingering longer than appropriate.
“Are you… seeing someone?” he asked, but almost instantly regretted it.
“Yeah,” you nodded. “You?”
He nodded back. “Yeah.”
Silence settled between you, both unsure of what to say. From an outside perspective, it looked like you had both moved on, but the truth was you hadn’t. You were constantly on each other’s minds, clinging like something that refused to let go.
“And are you happy?” he asked.
His only concern was that you found someone better than him, that this breakup wasn’t in vain, and that you were happy without him. In the end, it was the sole purpose of the fact that you weren’t together. He wanted you to have what you deserved—something that he couldn’t give you.
“I am,” you told him. “He makes me happy.”
It was the truth, but what you weren’t saying was that he didn’t make you as happy as Jungkook ever did. Your life with Dohwan could never compare to what you had with Jungkook. It was impossible.
“I hope your girlfriend also makes you happy,” you gently said.
That was you being nice, but deep down, you hoped he wasn’t happy. Not because he broke your heart, but because a part of you wanted to have him back.
“I am,” he said, avoiding disclosing the fact that he was outside because he had an ugly discussion with her.
“Good,” you said with a small smile.
“I’m happy for you, yn,” he admitted. “You deserve it.”
Your heart beat faster, your chest boiling with intense emotions. Some memories of the terrible breakup surfaced, and standing in front of him became suffocating all of a sudden. You needed to leave.
“I have to go,” you then said. “It was nice seeing you again.”
And before he could even speak, you turned your back and left, as you did two years ago.
After that, it felt like destiny wanted to reunite you with the man who broke your heart. For a couple of months, you’d accidentally cross paths in a café, or at a bus stop, or even in a bookstore. Conversations were always short, but they were always left with the same heaviness.
No words were needed to understand that your hearts still beat for each other. It was plainly obvious. And seeing each other in those random places would ignite a fire that had long disappeared. It couldn’t happen. It was wrong.
However, you both would go back home to your respective partners. Jungkook would feel a guilt bloom inside him whenever he’d kiss Mirae. He cared for her. He really did, but sometimes, when she smiled, he felt like he was borrowing comfort instead of owning it.
On your side, every time you’d hold Dohwan’s hand, you wondered why it didn’t feel like coming home. He was good, gentle, patient, and treated you right. But you continued to compare each moment with him to memories of Jungkook that lingered, unable to be forgotten.
Neither of you crossed any lines. You never cheated but never confessed to your partners that you had met several times. But emotionally, you knew you had never left each other. He was still yours. And you were still his.
You lived in that quiet in-between: loyal in action, and unfaithful in thought.
But that only lasted until one lonely night.
“When were you going to tell me you met your ex?” Dohwan suddenly asked.
His words made you freeze for a second.
“What?” You turned around to face him at the kitchen’s entrance.
Your heart was hammering in your chest. How did he know?
“James told me he saw you yesterday,” he replied as if he had read your mind.
“Oh,” you tried to sound as normal as possible. “I ran into him in a store. We just chatted a bit, nothing important.”
Well, you weren’t lying, but it wasn’t the full truth either.
“Then, why didn’t you say anything?” he asked with confusion, his arms crossed against his chest.
This entire situation was making you extremely uncomfortable and nervous. How are you supposed to talk about your ex with your current boyfriend? How are you supposed to tell him that it wasn’t the first time?
“What is there to say?” you asked. “As I said, it wasn’t important.”
Dohwan scanned your face for a moment, not buying any of the bullshit you were throwing his way.
“So, you’re telling me that you bumped into the guy who broke your heart, randomly talked to him, and that it wasn’t important?” he then summarized the situation. “Sorry, but I don’t believe you, my love.”
“Believe it or not, it’s the truth,” you said, avoiding his gaze.
“Yn,” he stepped closer, his tall frame standing next to you. “You know you can tell me everything?” his soft hands cupped your face. “If it did hurt seeing him again, you can say it.”
You shook your head, pushing his hands away. Having this conversation with him right now was painful. You couldn’t do it.
“Dohwan, I told you it was nothing important,” you insisted.
He took a deep breath, trying to remain calm, but his patience was running thin. He knew you weren’t telling the truth. The few times you had spoken about Jungkook, it made you cry like a literal baby in his arms. How could he believe that when he picked up the pieces of your shattered heart?
“Okay,” he then backed up. “If you don’t want to talk, I’ll leave you alone.”
His respect for your boundaries made your heart ache. This man was too good for you—you clearly didn’t deserve him.
However, things escalated in the days following the conversation. You avoided him more and more, always finding excuses, and Dohwan was slowly losing his patience. He knew something was off, and it was frustrating that you weren’t talking to him.
“Are you cheating on me with that bastard?” he randomly asked some days later.
You almost choked on your water, spilling some onto the plate in front of you.
“Are you for real?” you asked, annoyed and angry that he even thought of something like that. “Do you think I’d cheat on you?”
Dohwan took a deep breath. “I don’t know what to think anymore, yn. You’re avoiding me like I have the plague, you’ve been cold as ice, and you absolutely refuse to talk about him.”
His dark eyes were watching you intently, scanning your face and searching for something that might betray you.
“But that doesn’t mean that I’m cheating,” you said, putting down the fork and knife on the plate.
“Why else would you then be running away from me?”
At that moment, you were the one who took a deep breath.
“Maybe the fact that I simply don’t want to talk about my ex with you is reason enough. I’m not cheating on you.”
“It’s a lost cause…” he whispered.
“What are you saying?” you asked with anger.
“It doesn’t matter…”
You shook your head, frustrated about this entire situation. You were on the verge of exploding.
“Say it,” you snapped. “Stop talking in half sentences and just say what you mean.”
Dohwan ran a hand through his hair before standing up and pacing away from the table. For a moment, he turned his back on you as if he needed some time to gather himself. Despite the fact that he was a very good person, he sometimes had some temper issues. He could get angry in the blink of an eye.
“I mean that I don’t recognize you anymore,” he finally said as he faced you again. “You shut me out, you avoid me, and God forbid I even mention his name.”
“That’s not fair,” you shot back, standing up as well.
“Isn’t it?” he replied, his voice rising despite himself. “You were a fucking mess years ago because of that man, and now, it just feels like he’s back in your life. How is it supposed to be fair? You don’t even talk to me.”
Your chest tightened. Emotions were taking the best out of you. In between frustration and anger, guilt bloomed inside you.
“You’re overthinking this,” you said.
“No, yn,” he said, shaking his head. “I’m trying to understand what’s happening, and you won’t even let me in.”
This conversation overwhelmed you more than you wanted to admit. You hated having arguments with Dohwan because they were always intense due to your explosive personalities.
“I already told you: nothing is going on.”
He let out a short and humorless laugh while shaking his head.
“That’s exactly the problem,” he replied. “There’s nothing. You’re physically here, but your mind is somewhere else.”
The words hit harder than you expected. You opened your mouth, trying to defend yourself, but nothing came out. He was right. You had been distant. You were stuck between the present and a past you couldn’t quite let go of.
Dohwan watched your silence, and something in his expression shifted. There wasn’t any anger anymore. He suddenly looked completely exhausted, as if he was done with this.
“I can’t keep doing this,” he said quietly. “I feel like I’m trying to catch someone who’s already halfway gone.”
“I’m not gone,” you insisted, though your voice lacked conviction. “I’m right here with you.”
Your boyfriend didn’t believe a single word.
“Then prove it,” he replied. “Talk to me. Tell me what’s really going on.”
You looked down at the table with your discarded plates. Your appetite was long gone because your mind was spiraling with all those emotions and thoughts. Things weren’t easy at that precise moment.
How could you explain something you barely understood yourself? How could you explain that seeing Jungkook again had stirred feelings you thought were buried? How could you explain to Dohwan that you didn’t even know what you wanted anymore?
Saying all of that out loud would destroy him, and he didn’t deserve it. You loved him deeply, and the last thing you wanted to do was to break his heart.
“I don’t know what to say,” you admitted.
Dohwan knew right there and then that something was definitely going on. Something had happened with Jungkook, and it hurt him that you didn’t trust him enough to tell him. He exhaled slowly, disappointment flickering across his face.
“That’s what scares me.”
A heavy silence settled between you. This was crushing the two of you, and you hated yourself for what you were doing to him.
“Maybe…” he spoke after a long moment. “Maybe we need some space.”
Your head snapped up, disbelief plastered all over your face.
“Space?” you asked, your eyebrows furrowing.
“I don’t want to keep this going,” he explained. “You’re confused, and I’m losing my mind trying to figure out what’s going on. Maybe if we take a step back for a bit, we’ll see things more clearly.”
The suggestion made your stomach drop, yet a small part of you felt relief. The tension between you had become unbearable.
“You mean a break?” you asked quietly.
“Yeah,” he nodded. “Just for a little while.”
You swallowed hard. “And then what?”
“Then we see if we still want this,” he answered honestly.
The words hurt more than you expected because you did want this.
“Okay,” you said finally, your voice barely above a whisper.
Dohwan nodded, but neither of you moved. The distance between you suddenly felt enormous, even though he was standing in front of you. And for the first time since the argument started, neither of you had anything left to say.
Days went by after your argument with Dohwan.
His absence made you realize just how lost you were. Things were definitely messy, and it was simply because Jungkook was somehow back in your life.
After that, you made sure you’d only be at home or work. Any other place was avoided at all costs because deep down, you knew you didn’t want to see Jungkook. It would only worsen everything.
With your headphones on, you walked as fast as possible to the subway station. At a red light, as you looked up, your gaze fell on the other man you had been trying to avoid. Jungkook.
For a moment, you admired him. As usual, he looked extremely good under his fancy suit and coat. His girlfriend Mirae was lucky to have him, and at that precise instant, you were jealous that he’d go home to her. Not you.
A smile stretched across his face when he noticed you. His entire being lit up when he saw you, and your heart melted completely.
When the light turned green, Jungkook basically ran to you, taking huge steps in your direction. That caught you absolutely off guard since you didn’t expect this reaction from him.
“Hi,” he said when his body towered over you.
“Hi, Jungkook,” you said with a silly smile on your face.
His strong cologne wrapped around you, invading your nostrils. It was still the same, even after all these years. But what truly warmed your heart was the fact that you had gifted it to him. It felt like he was still carrying a part of you.
“Didn’t expect to see you here this late,” he confessed.
“Well, I’ve worked extra hours these past few days,” you admitted. “I’m exhausted.”
Concern appeared on his face as his fingers tugged a strand of hair behind your ear. His touch sent shivers down your spine; your gaze locked on his. The world around you completely disappeared. It was just you and him.
“You should try to rest a bit,” he said with a soft voice. “It will only tire you more and more.”
“I know,” you replied. “But I’m way too committed to my work.”
Jungkook nodded while his fingers slid down from your ear to your cheek before his hand rested against it. The moment felt heavy with unspoken emotions, but you both knew what they meant. The affection and love you both carried for each other were blooming all over again, but stronger this time.
However, you put some distance between you. The moment felt way too intimate, and he had a girlfriend, Mirae, who was probably waiting for him at home. You promised yourself you wouldn’t cross any lines with him—at least not if other people were involved.
“You should go back home,” you whispered as you pushed his hand from your face. “Mirae must be waiting for you.”
Jungkook lowered his head for a moment before looking up at you. His eyes shone with an emotion you hadn’t seen in a while—longing. It startled you instantly. How could he look at you like that when he was in a relationship with someone else?
“I’m not with her anymore,” he confessed. “I broke up with her weeks ago.”
Your eyes opened wide. This was definitely surprising. The way he talked about her made it look like he was madly in love with her.
“Why?” you frowned.
A chuckle escaped his lips.
“Seriously?” he asked. “The reason seems pretty obvious.”
Your heart started beating extremely fast. When you truly understood the reason, you shook your head, your mind refusing to believe it. He shouldn’t have done that. He couldn’t have broken up with her because of you.
“No,” you said while taking a step back. “Don’t say that you broke up with her because of me.”
His voice softly whispered your name as his hand reached for your arm. This couldn’t be happening. Another woman’s heart was broken, and you were to blame. Before loving Jungkook, you were a girl’s girl, and that wasn’t right to Mirae.
In the end, to you, this seemed worse than cheating.
“Please,” he begged, “don’t run away from me.”
You turned away, putting distance between you and him, unable to believe what you were hearing. Your steps quickened without you realizing it, your heart pounding loudly in your chest.
Behind you, his voice kept calling your name, each time more urgent. His footsteps chased yours as he refused to let you disappear. After a couple of minutes, he caught up with you, stepping in front of you and forcing you to stop.
“Let me pass,” you told him without even looking at him.
“No,” his strong body blocked you. “Listen to me.”
You shook your head, refusing to hear whatever he had to say.
“There’s nothing to listen to.”
Even though you didn’t want to, your body didn’t move as if it was telling you that you needed to speak with him and listen to what he had to say.
“I couldn’t stay with her,” he still said.
His hand reached again to your arm, and the gesture made you look up at him.
“It would have been cruel to stay with her while I was constantly thinking about you, wishing it was you beside me instead of her,” he continued with a weak and shaky voice.
For a moment, you closed your eyes. This couldn’t be real.
“Wouldn’t have you done the same?” he asked, his question echoing in your mind.
Well, the only answer to his question was that you didn’t have the strength to do it. Your heart craved Jungkook deeply, but your mind was telling you the safest choice was Dohwan. Jungkook dared to do what you couldn’t. You settled with a ‘let’s have some space’ when you knew space wasn’t what you needed.
Your silence was answer enough for Jungkook. His hand left your arm before slipping inside his pocket, disappointment written all over his face.
“You actually wouldn’t…” he concluded. “So you’d stay with Dohwan and keep entertaining whatever is going on between us.”
You were completely overwhelmed by everything. You didn’t know what to do anymore. Would you cross the line with Jungkook? Would you choose him over Dohwan? You didn’t know.
“Do you realize that you’ll have to choose between one of us one day?” he asked with clear ache in his voice. “You can’t have us both.”
“Easy for you to say that when you were the one who broke my heart…” You ran your hand over your face. “I’m lost, okay? I don’t even know if I’m with Dohwan…” you mumbled.
Jungkook stepped closer, his hand grabbing yours and squeezing it. The tenderness of his gesture melted your heart and comforted you in some way.
“We’re technically on a break,” you added.
Jungkook’s reappearance in your life had complicated everything. There were moments when you wished there were an easy answer to all of your problems, but there wasn’t. You were the only one to decide.
“Then, give me a chance,” he whispered as his fingers intertwined with yours. “Let me show you that I’ve changed.”
Why did it feel like it right to let him in all over again? Why did it feel like it was the best decision? And why didn’t you think of Dohwan at that moment?
You didn’t know but decided that maybe Jungkook deserved that second chance.
Being around Jungkook felt different this time.
It was like you had a completely different person in front of you. It wasn’t the Jungkook you dated years ago, and honestly, it felt refreshing to have this healthier version of him. Things were for sure messy and complicated, but whenever you were with him, the situation seemed rather simple.
However, when you were alone, far from him, guilt would sometimes take over you. You were having your fun with your ex while you were on a break with Dohwan.
“I saw Dohwan yesterday at a bar, heavily flirting with some chick,” your best friend, Rosie, said.
Your heart squeezed at that simple thought, but somehow, it reassured you that he wasn’t just alone at his place, waiting for this break to be over.
“Mmh, good for him,” you replied.
You couldn’t help but wonder if this wasn’t some sort of cheating. At the end of the day, you didn’t say that you were over. But at the same time, you weren’t together either. One thing was sure: you couldn’t blame him. You did the same, if not worse.
“Have you talked since the argument?” she asked with concern.
You shook your head. Since the moment you decided to take a break, you hadn’t heard from him at all. He had totally vanished from your life, but that was also the purpose of the break. The point was to see if you still wanted each other. If you were still together and talking all the time, it wouldn’t help figure things out.
Rosie was one of the few people who knew about Jungkook being back in the life. When you stumbled upon him the first time, you immediately told her. She was the one who held you after the terrible breakup with him.
She was also the first person you reached out to when you and Dohwan agreed to go on a break. She warned you that you’d inevitably fall into Jungkook’s arms, but she even encouraged you since she was convinced that it would help you to decide.
“Aren’t you scared that he'll break up with you?”
“If he does, I won’t blame him,” you honestly replied. “It will hurt, for sure, but he deserves to be happy.”
“Don’t know how you manage to deal with all that so peacefully,” she admitted. “I would have gone completely crazy.”
You chuckled while looking at the pictures hanging on her walls. “Who said I wasn’t going crazy?”
You got yourself in a very messy situation, and you didn’t even know how to deal with it. You were going with the flow, which at that moment was leading you to Jungkook.
“Having Jungkook back in my life feels great, but I sometimes feel bad toward Dohwan. He didn’t ask for any of this, and I just dragged him into this messy situation,” you confessed. “I’m not even sure I should stay with him.”
There were moments when you were convinced Dohwan would be a lot better without you in his life.
“Don’t rush any decision, okay?” she told you, her hand resting on your shoulder and stroking it in a comforting way. “First, explore this thing with Jk, and then, you'll see how you truly feel.”
You nodded because you couldn’t agree more with her. For now, it was best that you and Dohwan truly took some time off to figure things out. But deep down, something inside you told you that if you couldn’t choose between them, it was best not to choose one of them.
“Hopefully, this doesn’t get any messier than it already is,” you chuckled.
She smiled at you, her thumb caressing your shoulder. Honestly, without her by your side, you wouldn’t know what to do. She always gave you so much good advice. She was the wiser one in your friendship, especially since she didn’t put herself in shitty positions like you. She was in a good and healthy relationship.
That same night, Jungkook picked you up from Rosie’s place. He didn’t want you to wander around alone at night. You tried to reassure him, saying that it wasn’t the first time and that sharing your location with him was also an option. But he absolutely refused.
From the moment you agreed to give him a chance, he’d been picking you up at work every day, making sure you’d arrive home safe and sound. He’d also take you on small dates so that you could rediscover each other all over again.
Those small gestures and moments truly convinced you that he had changed for the better. But was it enough?
Before you could even understand what was going on, Jungkook had pulled up in a deserted parking lot. From the moment you jumped into his car, you had been heavily flirting with each other. The tension became unbearable, and none of you could make it home.
So here you were, dress bunched around your waist with Jungkook’s mouth hot against your throat as fog crept up the windows of his car.
“Fuck,” he swore, “I missed this,” he growled against your skin.
His large hands gripped your hips as you straddled him in the backseats. This moment was hot as fuck, you on top of him while you were both consumed by the same lust. With what had been going on for the past months, it was evident that it would all end up like this.
“Actually, I missed you,” he corrected himself as he licked your throat.
His lips dragged along your collarbones as his fingers found the edge of your panties. They slipped beneath the lace, finding you already soaking wet. He didn’t waste any time and ran his skilled fingers along your folds, which made you moan loudly.
“Already so wet,” he murmured as he circled your clit with practiced ease.
Even after all these years, he still knew your body so well and knew how to make your thighs tremble. It became impossible to think properly with this exquisite torture.
“I bet nobody touched you as I do,” he whispered against your skin, his burning lips pressing a kiss on your collarbone.
You bit your lip, refusing to answer him. Dohwan wasn’t bad at sex, but it clearly was different. Jungkook was more intense, and things were by far a lot better. Your body ended up betraying you as your hips rolled against his hand, chasing the friction.
“That’s what I thought,” his deep voice vibrated against your chest.
Jungkook’s free hand cupped your face to kiss you hungrily. This kiss was all teeth and tongue as he was so desperate to feel your mouth on his. It felt like an eternity ago since you last kissed each other with so much passion and intensity.
Your hands found their way to his pants, fumbling with his belt. If Jungkook was desperate, then you were frenzied. Jungkook helped you to shove his pants down, freeing his cock. His tip was already leaking precum.
“Do you have a condom?” you asked, your eyes completely glued to his shaft standing tall between your bodies.
“No,” he shook his head. “Wasn’t exactly planning on having sex with you in my car,” he chuckled before pressing a kiss on your throat.
For a second, you tried to think, but you couldn’t. The man sitting beneath you was consuming your entire soul. It was impossible to think with his dark and lust-filled gaze on you. You just wanted him to fuck the shit out of you.
“Do you trust me?” he asked.
Maybe you shouldn’t. You didn’t know if he had sex with people who had sexually transmitted infections. There were high risks, but you didn’t care, too focused on the pleasure his cock could give you. So you nodded anyway.
Jungkook pushed your panties aside to line himself up, the tip of his cock pressing against your entrance. For a moment, he stayed there, not moving and simply looking at you tremble above him.
This man always loved to tease you, but fuck, this was too much torture for you. You couldn’t handle it.
“Jungkook, please—” you begged.
He instantly slammed you down onto him. The stretch was immediate and overwhelming, and it punched the air from your lungs. It was too much, but too perfect as well.
Your nails dug into his shoulders as you adjusted yourself to the intrusion. Jungkook didn’t move for a while, giving you a moment to adjust to him. He groaned low in his throat, his head falling back against the seat.
The sight of his exposed neck gave you wild ideas, so you leaned down to press a kiss. His arm wrapped around your body, pushing you even closer. Quickly, you found yourself sucking on the skin of his throat, making him groan even more. No doubt, it’d leave a nasty mark.
“You’re so fucking tight,” he gritted out. “You feel so good wrapped around my cock.”
His words made you moan against his skin. When your lips detached from his throat, he started moving, lifting you up and pulling you back down. The two of you started to moan inside his car. His grip on your hips was controlling the pace while your nails dug into his shoulders.
Your entire body was on fire, pleasure coiling tighter and tighter in your core. As it did, you could feel yourself squeezing him more and more, bringing you both closer to the edge.
Slowly but surely, the air became filled with sex and sweat. The windows were completely fogged, and the car was filled with your whimpers, moans, and groans. His free hand was all over your body as if he was memorizing every part of you.
“Shit,” Jungkook hissed.
His pace was punishing at that stage, and your walls were clenching around him like crazy. Since the beginning, your gazes were locked on each other as if you were too scared of what could happen if you looked away. The way he looked at you—like you were the only thing that mattered—made your chest ache.
At this moment, nothing else existed except for the two of you. After all this time, you were finally together. You were his, and he was yours, again. And it felt so right. It felt like you always belonged here.
As he shifted a bit, he hit that spot inside you that made you see stars. His thumb found your clit, rubbing circles when he noticed how you were shaking on top of him. Your orgasm was building as fast as the speed of light, and you knew it’d be a devastating one.
And then, you shattered.
You loudly moan his name, your whole body shaking as pleasure consumed you entirely. Jungkook fucked you through it, and prolonged it until you were an oversensitive mess in his arms. He was also so close.
“I’m going…”
He didn’t even finish his sentence before he came inside you with a guttural moan. His cock pulsed inside you as he filled you with his hot cum. The sensation drove you to heaven. Nobody had ever come inside you after him. Not even Dohwan.
Neither of you moved for a moment, sitting there with your bodies still joined as you tried to calm down your heavy breathing.
After what felt like eternity, you climbed off his lap, wincing at the loss of him. Your legs were shaking as you straightened your dress and rearranged your laced panties.
“We should maybe head back to my place,” you said as you sat next to him.
Needless to say, you continued what started in his car at your place all night long. Having him inside you and between your legs simply felt right. It felt like you always belonged there.
After the very heated night with Jungkook, you woke up next to him in your bed. It felt strange to have him beside you, but it wasn’t bad—actually, it felt great. And let’s just say that you couldn’t resist each other.
Sex with him had always been so intense and fucking good. Resisting him had always been impossible. This man was your weakness.
However, you didn’t stay in bed all day long. Since you always enjoyed going for walks, Jungkook joined you. Holding hands felt simply natural while you were discussing with the brightest smiles on your face.
Being with him after all the chaos was peaceful, but you couldn’t help but notice how things were different this time around. When you were dating him years ago, towards the end, it was evident that he was an absolute mess. He destroyed everything. The man you loved back then wasn’t the right one for you.
Today, he was different in a good way—more mature, more confident, and above all, happier. His smile would light up the world, and his laugh was contagious. Loving him this time felt like the easiest thing in the world.
Nevertheless, a part of you was constantly reminding you that it was different. It was like you were holding onto the past version of him, when that version had destroyed you in more ways than you could express. How could you love that person?
Yes, you loved Jungkook, but not in the same way anymore.
That man had haunted your nights and days for the past few years. It was sometimes almost impossible to get over him, but now that you had him back in your life, it was simply weird.
Obviously, you were torn apart between your heart and mind. Your heart belonged to Jungkook, but your mind ached for Dohwan.
Loving Dohwan was easy and always felt like comfort, but loving Jungkook was complete chaos—a chaos you’d always been desperately attracted to. You were fully aware that things with Jungkook weren’t the healthiest. It was all in the way you ended up with him at that precise moment.
Most of the time, when you reflected on the past, you always saw Jungkook as the right person, but met at the wrong time. Would today be the right time? Well, only time would tell.
You and Jungkook weren’t bad people, not at all. It was simply the way you loved each other that wasn’t ideal. Because even the kindest people can lose themselves in the wrong love. It doesn’t make them toxic—it only means they weren’t with the right person.
At that moment, with his fingers entwined with yours, you refused to think about the future. What mattered was enjoying every second with him, because you knew those moments wouldn’t last eternally.
Jungkook was the right person, but would there ever be a right time?
— author’s note: well, thank you for reading until the end!! this was very different than my usual works but i truly hope you enjoyed it!! don’t hesitate to let me know what you thought of it ❤️❤️
⟶ Summary | Be careful what you wish for, because you may never know how to deal with it once it comes true. What would you do when your wish for a second chance actually came true? But was it really a fulfilled wish? Too many questions lie when it actually happened. Were they real memories? Or perhaps a part of a past life? Was it only a dream all along? Will everything be different this time?
⟶ Character | Jungkook x reader / Jimin x reader (feat. Taehyung)
⟶ Genre | Time Leap!au, Soulmate!au, Reincarnation/regression!au
⟶ Ratings & Warnings | +18 / M for Mature; involving explicit smut/mature scenes, mentions of cancer and characters death, appropriate warnings will be applied on each chapter whenever necessary.
⟶ Story Notes | Written in 1st person POV; in case you’re new to my writing, I don’t use ‘y/n’ coding as all of my lead characters are considered as OCs
⟶ Status/Total word count | ONGOING; latest update: Chapter 20.5 | Taehyung - 278,298 words of n/a words
But not "my dog died" or "I feel insecure" kinda angst. I'm talking about the cheating, the break up, the suffering, the tears, the begging, the pining, the stalking, the obsession UGHHHH, love me a fic where he fucked up and now has to do the most to get her back, it gives me a serotonin boost
