Hi all, this is Xing. I’m here.
Some of you might already forget about me, and I understand that. I stopped coming back to Tumblr so suddenly and I didn’t stay in contact with any friends I had on Tumblr. I’m a horrible friend. I’m sorry.
Honestly, I don’t really know or couldn’t remember what happened to me when I stopped coming back.
All I could remember was the feeling of losing my passion.
I can’t remember what time it was, but at that time, I felt I was doing nothing and couldn’t do anything. I didn’t have any passion to draw. I didn’t want to look at comics or anime or anything I used to like. I couldn’t bring myself to talk to anyone. I completely isolated myself from the world.
I tried to come back to Tumblr once, but I soon felt broken again. I didn’t lose my ability to draw, but I wasn’t able to bring myself to draw like I used to. I ran away from Tumblr once again.
I don’t know what gotten into me. I tried to draw and post art again on Twitter. For a short while, I was able to create and find some passion for myself, but something happened in real life and I stopped drawing once again.
For a long time, I thought of Tumblr as a dream where I could escape from reality to find comfort, but it’s a dream that has to stop someday. One day I will have my own life and everything in Tumblr will be all behind me.
I came back today and I realized that I was wrong.
I expected all of my friends and followers would be gone and I’m just a nobody, but it turns out a lot of people are still there. People are still liking my art from the past and remember me.
Many people sent nice messages asking how I’m doing and about my drawings. I literately went crying while reading the messages. Thank you all so much.
Tumblr is not a dream. Everything and everyone is real. Everyone is making the best of their life regardless of the difficulty in their life. Memory flows back into me and I remember most of my passion actually came from every person I met and every single amazing thing I saw on Tumblr. I couldn’t believe that I left all of these many years ago and I regret missing out so much.
All in all, this is a long text, so thank you so much for reading.
I want to come back to Tumblr. I don’t know what I will do, but I will try not to run away again. Sorry for being away so much and thank you all for still being here.
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