kms

[littlenightblog]

[neonkontra]

[xjshjbfwqj]

Tell me, what do I have to do to pass your test? To be "depressed enough"? To be "anxious enough" to be worthy of proper treatment. Was swallowing 120 pills when I was 14 not enough? Was slicing my arm not enough? How can I prove to you all how much I'm fucking suffering. I stopped eating and nobody gives a fuck. I cry all the time and it's a struggle to look at my bare skin now and not want to grate a blade over and over until I bleed out. I don't know what I have to do to pass your test. I keep so quiet about the things inside, I rehearse what I want to say about my illness a thousand times in my head but in the end all that comes out is "I'm fine, really, I'm feeling better". I'm fucking not I'm fucking incarcerated by my mind. What kind of a doctor or parent can't see through my heavy, perfectly applied makeup into my tear stained face and bleeding eyes and bitten tongue. Why can't you see I'm fucking suffering. Do I have to fucking die and leave the earth for somebody to understand the extent of my sadness? I need it to be validated instead of being the depressed bitch in bed all day who doesn't eat or talk. Fucking see through me.

[suicide-is-my-father]

But when it came right down to it, the skin of my wrist looked so white and defensless that I couldn’t do it. It was as if what I wanted to kill wasn’t in that skin or the thin blue pulse that jumped under my thumb, but somewhere else, deeper, more secret, and a whole lot harder to get.

Sylvia Plath - The Bell Jar (via suicide-is-my-father)

[myboyfriendpetebuttigieg]

Reblog this if you slept with my ex-wife Susan.

Trying to prove a point to my divorce lawyer.

[schnapsliebe]

Sometimes you just need someone to tell you you’re not as terrible as you think you are.

(via schnapsliebe)

[zazdrosna]

[quietvoiced]

[punkasspoets]

The thing about an anxiety disorder is that you know it is stupid. You know with all your heart that it wasn’t a big deal and that it should roll off of you. But that is where the disorder kicks in; Suddenly the small thing is very big and it keeps growing in your head, flooding your chest, and trying to escape from under your skin. You know with all of your heart that you’re being ridiculous and you hate every minute of it. The fact that many people don’t recognize or have patience for your illness only makes everything worse.

Ten years of experience  (via mer-se)

[quietvoiced]

[verygothic]

[clementinevonradics]

You are on the floor crying, and you have been on the floor crying for days. And that is you being brave. That is you getting through it as best you know how. No one else can decide What your tough looks like.

Clementine von Radics  (via internal-acceptance-movement)

[dominicmatthewjackson]

You think you’ve seen her naked because she took her clothes off? Tell me about her dreams. Tell me what breaks her heart. What is she passionate about, and what makes her cry? Tell me about her childhood. Better yet, tell me one story about her that you’re not in.   You’ve seen her skin, and you’ve touched her body. But you still know as much about her as a book you once found, but never got around to opening.

(via raysofthesun)

[secretinqs-deactivated20190520]

“Have you ever lost someone close to you?” “Yes.” “Did it hurt?” “Yes.” “Would you want anyone else to feel that pain?” “No.” “That’s a reason to stay alive.”

Something I told myself (via secretinqs)

[affinitized-deactivated20150918]

[wordsthat-speak]

Because, nothing makes me happier and nothing makes me sadder than you.”

The History of Love (Nicole Krauss)

[melodramatic-dad]