Hi!

The name's Em (she/he) 28. Just a blog of random stuff. 🏳️‍🌈

[kaity--did]

The problem with having a child with an attorney that has spoken to the child like an adult since birth is that she's 4 years old and she's negotiating the order in which we're going to complete tasks as a family to best suit her idea of an ideal day.

[kaity--did]

Penny: We go home, we play the mirror game, we have dessert, we play more games, we have fun deal?

Me: Okay well actually we're going to go home, have dinner, then dessert, then we can play your video game, then tubby then bed

Penny: Okay no tubby, games first, deal?

Me: This is not - what is happening right now?

Penny: Dada?

Dada: Arbitration?

Penny: DEALS!

[kaity--did]

Every single thing in our lives has become a negotiation and it is frankly ridiculous as it is hilarious.

Penny: I want to use bare foot when we go outside

Me: I didn't know we were going outside but you have to wear shoes girl

Penny: okay but what about I use bare foot's but at Penny's house? This deal?

Me: you know what yeah fine if you agree to not fight about shoes when we leave the house you can be barefoot in the back yard, deal.

Penny: -sticks her hand out expectantly- we deal?

I think I just made a verbal contract with a 4 year old.

[kaity--did]

She's attempting to establish evidence I think

Penny: but I want to go shool pwease

Dada: okay well it is 8pm, so you have to go to sleep now

Penny: okay but I see my fwiends at shool now please, deal?

Dada: Darling no one is at school, all your friends are asleep as well.

Penny: all Penny's fwiends are sweep? What about we... get in Dadas car and check to see watch them sweep, yes deal?

Dada: I cannot begin to explain to you why that can not happen

[kaity--did]

The great thing about being beholden to Penny the Deals Warlock is that she is also beholden to the art of the deal

Me: (watching Penny scoot her step stool over to where we keep the candy jar): hey honey we're literally walking out the door to go get dinner, maybe we wait on the candy okay?

Penny: Oh but I will have some candy?

Me: Why don't you come have some mac and cheese and then when we get home you can have some candy, deal?

Penny: (running out the door) oh, yes this is deals!

[kaity--did]

We are visiting my family and Papa has quickly had to pay patronage to Penny the Deals Warlock

Papa: (yesterday morning, when Penny was a little grumpy) What about you come downstairs and we'll have some waffles and then tomorrow Papa will take you to the Diner in town for breakfast?

Penny: (extending her tiny hand to a VERY confused man) this is deal?

Papa: (not knowing hes entering a literal contract) uhm yeah deal.

-smash cut to 6:30 AM this morning-

Penny (running down the hallway in bare feet) 👹BREAKFAST DEALS👹

[kaity--did]

Penny has a canker sore to end all canker sores, to the point where she hasn't been able to eat so we had to make some deals surrounding getting some medicine on it because a hungry Penny Rose is like a angry demon queen

Me: Okay baby this is going to suck. This is going to hurt real bad for a second and then it's going to feel weird and then it's going to feel good. You're going to hate it. But if you let Mama get these three medicines in and on you [Listerine, Antacid, Tylenol] you can scream it out and then we'll go get some ice cream! Deal?

Penny: (obviously not thrilled with this idea) okay, three big shreams, three medicines, ice cream ... it will suck... ice cream ... deal. (Sticks out hand and we shake on it)

Me: okay let's do this I'm so sorry (starts the process)

Penny: ( In between her big screams ) IM GONNA GET LOTS OF FRINKLES

[kaity--did]

My husband is trying to make a deal with Penny to get upstairs and get in the bath tub

Penny: I will go upstairs and get my body clean but you hafta titch me, deal?

Dada: I would love to make this deal with you kid but I literally have no idea what you are saying- I don't know what the terms are, you're speaking a language I don't speak

Penny: you have to titch me like mama does okay DEAL!? (Sticks tiny hand out aggressively)

Dada: (looks at me bewildered for help)

Me: ( starts making a quick tick tick tick sound imitating a stop watch like I'm timing her, while penny jumps around yelling YES TITCH ME LIKE THAT)

Dada: In what world was I ever going to figure that out, thank you for acting as our legal interpreter yes deal let's go!

and off she sprints.

[kaity--did]

Penny does not want to go to bed, but man is it time for her to go to bed

Penny: But I don't want to be sleeping, I want to stay up now! I want to see Grampy and Cozy and Guppie and Papa!

Mama: What if we video call all the grands and say good night to everyone? If we do that will you then go to bed no fussing?

Penny: Oh yes, this is deals! -sticks her hand out to shake-

** we make the rounds and video call all her grandparents, they are all already in bed and say good night and penny hangs up the last video call and toddles into bed with minimal fussing **

Penny : (after a few minutes of silence, over the video monitor, to herself in her dark bedroom) I hafta respect da deals.

[kaity--did]

Every morning Penny wakes up, and she asks if we have decorated her house with "Halloween every where" and every morning I have had to tell her not yet baby but soon. This last morning Penny had to go to pre k a little earlier then she is used to cause Daddy had court and I had a dentist appointment, which made her a little bummed out... or so I thought

Me: Hey baby do you want to make a deal about school?

Penny: (immediately sticks out her hand, literally no hesitation, her entire demeanor changing in an instant) yes let's deals, I will be big and brave and go to school no fussing, and you will put Halloween every where all over my house, okay this is deals Mama??

I think I just got hustled by a 4 year old...

[kaity--did]

A tangentially related update :

Penny: (is doing some strange interpretive dance to let us know she's not a fan of the cup we've chosen to put her juice in, mind you this is the only clean cup at this moment. She is hopping up and down, and swinging her arm like an elephant trunk, she is pirouetting, her hands are on her hips. Shes is completely silent)

Husband: (exasperated) okay but DID you make a deal with SOMETHING while you were pregnant ? It's the only explanation I can come up with.

[kaity--did]

sometimes people will ask me if penny is still making deals and here is an update for you to let you know:

Husband: okay, you can not leave your room until someone comes and gets you okay? You're getting up way too early and we're guests in Papa and Guppies house so you stay and play in your room and someone will come get you when you can come out of your room tomorrow morning, deal?

Penny: (hand extended, plotting) deal

-smash cut to the next morning, penny is NOT in her room at the allotted 7:30 AM retrieve Penny Rose Time, we find her in bed cuddled up with my mom and dad watching a movie-

Penny: (hands out in a "calm down" gesture) LISTEN LISTEN I DIDNT LEAVE! I DIDNT- I didn't break da deals! I just knocked on the door until Papa came and got me.

Papa: (laughing hysterically) WELL DONT SNITCH!

Penny: I DIDNT DO NOTHING I KEPT MY DEALS! YOU JUS SAID SOMEONE HAD TO COME GET ME! PAPA COME GET ME!

(so we have to be insanely detailed in our deals because she did knock on her bed room door and yell PAPA! PAPA! PAPA! At 4:30 in the morning until my dad came and got her and you know what that's on us 🤣)

[kaity--did]

Yes she's still at it folks

Penny: can we watch a Pokémon?

Me: I'll make a deal with you?

Penny: -sits down at the dining room table like she's on literal trial- Listening

Me: if you can do bath time and get around for bed with literally NO FUSSING you and I can watch ONE POKÉMON in mama and dadas bed before you go to bed! IF I HEAR ONE BIT OF FUSSING POKÉMON IS OFF THE TABLE!

Penny: -folding her hands ready to counter, speaking to me like I'm losing my faculties- uhm, no deal Mama, I want Pokémon on the TV not on the table.

Me: -trying not to die- that's ...no I just mean the deal is if you fuss at all there will be NO POKÉMON TONIGHT

Penny: oh! Yes! This is deals!

[bagool-the-wizard]

One sec adding "This Is Deals" to my personal vocabulary.

[kaylmao]

idk i would personally rather give up access to certain products seasonally or locally than have people enslaved to give me the ability to have any product any place any time. i think i can go without tomatoes in january.

[lastoneout]

Sorry we really went from free the nipple, take back the night, slut walks, and ending gender/sex segregation in sports being fucking milquetoast feminism 101 concepts to fucking girl dinner and "I just worry about fairness if we let trans girls play against cis ones" and "it was right of that woman to call the cops on a black man for existing near here in public during the day time because men are all violent monsters" and "radical feminism isn't transphobic we just need to kill all men including trans ones those oppressive traitors" and I will legit never be able to be normal about it. What the FUCK happened. I'd say I wonder what the feminists of my youth would say about this but I'm one and lemme tell ya I want to throw up. Go fucking read bell hooks or do something else useful please because all of this learned helplessness, gender essentialism, and transphobia dressed up as feminism is actively holding us back.

[mosab-story]

Tragically, my wife's heart suddenly stopped beating tonight.

I stood there frozen, unable to breathe as I watched her collapse before my eyes. I truly thought I was losing her forever, and I will never forgive anyone who sees this post, scrolls past it, and doesn't even support me with a single word.

Doctors said her condition is extremely critical, and that severe weakness caused this terrifying moment. Without urgent treatment, it could happen again at any time. So I am begging you can you help me get the treatment that could save my wife's life

I am begging you as a husband in Gaza, watching the love of my life suffer before my eyes while I cannot afford the treatment that could save her. Please don't wait. Donate now and help me save her life before it's too late.

Please donate now on GoFundMe.

vetted by #520

[wholesome-animal-images]

[whosname]

[id. A twitter post by @/Bennieeexyz Jury duty letter came addressed to my cat. Not a mistake. "Felix Martinez" - that's his full name according to his vet records. My last name. His first name. Somehow he's a registered voter now. Called the county clerk. Me: My cat got summoned for jury duty. Clerk: Is the name correct on the summons? Me: Yes, but he's a cat. Clerk: Is Felix Martinez a legal resident of this county? Me: He's a legal cat. Clerk: Sir, if the name matches our records, he needs to appear or file an exemption. Me: He can't file anything. He has paws. Clerk: You can file on his behalf. Me: Under what exemption? There's no box for "is a cat." Clerk: (pause) Check "unable to serve due to medical reasons." Me: What's the medical reason? Clerk: He's a cat. Me: That's not a medical condition. Clerk: It is if it prevents him from serving. Sent in the form. Got rejected two weeks later. "Insufficient documentation. Please provide medical professional's statement." Took the letter to my vet. Me: I need you to write that my cat can't do jury duty. Vet: Why is your cat summoned for jury duty? Me: Excellent question. No good answer. Vet: This is the weirdest request I've gotten. Me: Can you just write that he's medically unfit to serve? Vet: On what grounds? Me: He's a cat. Vet: (started typing) "Patient is unable to serve due to species-related limitations including inability to speak, read, or comprehend legal proceedings." Me: Perfect. Sent it in. Got another rejection. "Summons is mandatory. Failure to appear will result in contempt of court." My roommate thought this was hilarious. Roommate: Felix is going to jail. Me: This is serious. Roommate: Bring him to court. See what happens. Decided that was actually the only option left. Day of jury duty, put Felix in his carrier. Brought the entire paper trail of rejection letters. Checked in at the courthouse. Clerk: Name? Me: Felix Martinez. Clerk: (looked at the cat carrier) Is that Felix? Me: Yes. Clerk: (long stare) He's a cat. Me: I've been saying that for six weeks. Clerk: Why didn't you file an exemption? Me: I filed three. All rejected. Showed her the letters. She read through them, expression shifting from confusion to disbelief. Clerk: Someone rejected the veterinary documentation? Me: Twice. Clerk: (called her supervisor over) You need to see this. Supervisor read everything. Looked at Felix. Looked at me. Supervisor: How did a cat get registered to vote? Me: You tell me. Supervisor: This is a data error. Me: Took you six weeks to figure that out. They dismissed Felix immediately. Apologized for the inconvenience. Supervisor: We'll remove him from the voter registry. Me: Appreciate it. Supervisor: (pause) Out of curiosity, how would he have voted? Me: Probably whatever party supports universal treats. Got a formal apology letter a week later and a voter registration card. For me this time. Apparently I wasn't registered, but my cat was. Roommate: Felix committed voter fraud. Me: Felix committed nothing. He's innocent. Roommate: That's what they all say. Felix is sleeping on the jury summons now. Fitting end to his legal career. end id]

[youthincare]

people should be allowed to have low ambition, and also be able to feed a family on the salary of a cashier at a convenience store.

[existennialmemes]

The crux of the anti trans movement is a war on bodily autonomy. They don't want you to have any agency over what you look like, how you dress, who you date, whether to have kids, etc.

They want total control over you. Not just trans people. Not just queer people. You. Everyone.

Trans people are just a scapegoat. They want total control over everyone's self expression. They want the right to mold you into their perfect little cog in their dehumanizing machine.

Happy Trans Day of Visibility. Our rights are your rights. Our destruction is your destruction.

[our-trans-punk-experience]

10/10 post bringing it back for 2026

[freeshavacado]

you can only reblog this today

[bonefarm]

Get rid of your fucking Ring cameras holy shit. That was one of the most chilling ads I’ve ever seen

[creekfiend]

😰😰😰😰😰

[knitmeapony]

[outlaw-monarch]

For anyone confused about why this "sweet ad" is actually evil:

ring is passing the surveillance they collect to ice

ring is using these ID features to search for/identify people that ice wants to deport/kidnap/disappear, & using it to spy on Americans in general.

This ad is the company's gross & sneaky attempt to appeal to humans' kindness [ I'll be helping people find their pets!" ]

They are trying to trick more people into buying this tool that will be used as surveillance on people living in the USA

AND~!!!

also probably trying to trick people into turning on features/settings that will make it easier for them to pass information to ice and other hostile governmental authorities

[oakleafwolf]

WeRateDogs did a PSA on this

[sweetfirebird]

2 new food recalls and they are serious

FDA Announces Recall on 3 Tomato Sauces for Potential Botulism Risk

The U.S. Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has announced a recall of three tomato sauces sold at Big Y and Stop & Shop stores over a possible

Death Tolls Rise As Listeria-Contaminated Pasta Recall Expands Nationwide

Here is every pasta affected.

America is a functional country.....

[atinydroid]

in case you don't want to read the whole articles:

The pasta with Listera are ready-made pasta dishes (mostly pasta salad) sold at grocery stores that were provided by Nate's Fine Foods Inc. Stores include Trader Joes, Sprouds Farmer's Market, Kroger and Albertsons.

IT IS NOT DRIED PASTA. Listeria grows in cold environments and is an issue of cross-contamination. If you're worried about it regardless then the best way to avoid it is to wash ALL of your fruits/veggies, wash your cutting boards and utensils (including hands) and to thoroughly cook your food to the proper temperature.

For the tomato sauce: three First and Last brand sauces have been recalled at Big Y locations in Connecticut and Massachusetts and have a USE BY SEPT 2026 date.

And genuinely the best way to check for botulism is to make sure the lids/tops of tin cans aren't popped up BEFORE opening for the first time. That's the best indication for bacteria in the jar/can. It can't grow in air so

[rederiswrites]

With what's being done to Snap benefits--food stamps--this month, and Thanksgiving coming up, I think it's a really good time to give what you can to food pantries. With the reminder that money is always better than giving food, because the pantry is able to make that money go further and knows what they actually need.

[rederiswrites]

Find the Feeding America member food bank nearest you. Over 200 member food banks can connect you with free food, food pantries, soup kitche

[destiel-news-network]

(Source)

Only those who are over 65 years of age or have a "high-risk health condition" will be permitted to receive the 2025 COVID vaccine.

[weirdsociology]

this is a terrible development from a public health standpoint but from a personal standpoint if you want the vaccine: lie. lie your ass off.

your pharmacist won't ask what the qualifying health condition is (i don't think they're even allowed to), just make you check a box on the paperwork that you have one. your insurance may not pay for/reimburse you for the vaccine, but that won't keep you from getting it (as long as you can afford it - obviously big separate problem there.)

anecdotally: i have done this for years and no one cares. i've gotten a covid booster every 6 months for the past four years by checking the high risk box and absolutely no one has batted an eye, including my insurance, who theoretically probably know i don't have a qualifying condition.

so lie your ass off and go get your shot!

[thats-what-sidhe-said]

You may not even have to lie. Here's a list of "high risk" conditions.

[wyf-of-bathe]

ON IT BOSS

[learn-how-to-love]

We NEED to abolish the terms “women’s/men’s” healthcare like yesterday. No more gendered terms for ungendered organs and systems that allow for denial of care via language. Women need prostate exams. Men need prenatal care. Anyone and everyone can require a breast cancer screening. And no, changing the terminology to “AFAB/AMAB” healthcare is also unacceptable because it excludes the needs of intersex people and perisex trans people who have medically transitioned. Refuse to tolerate it anymore.

[oneshortdamnfuse]

I am once again explaining that in order for walkable cities and public transit to work for disabled people, there also need to be more public bathrooms available in and around those areas. Not just places to sit down or rest. Bathrooms. We need accessible, clean bathrooms. With sharps bins. With multiple wheelchair accessible stalls. With an area to set down supplies needed to maintain one’s body. Even if it’s not being used to get rid of bodily waste, bathrooms are one of the few spaces disabled people have to maintain some sort of privacy when they’re in the middle of a flare up or they need to take medication or what have you. Designing a public space? Include bathrooms.

[thestudentempanada]

June 9, 2025, NYC Resists with Gaza tells specifically Indigenous people in the USA that they shouldn’t vote:

Because why fight disenfranchisement when you can discourage Native Americans in the U.S. from exercising their rights?

Native American Voting Rights Project - Native American Rights Fund

Native American voters push back in courts and congresses against structural barriers and obstacles that seek to restrict our freedom to vot

Study Finds Extensive Barriers Restrict Native Americans from Voting

Federal and state governments have a duty to give Native American voters equal access to the ballot.

[penrosesun]

Guys, we have to get better at calling out transparent voter suppression psyops.

Because that's what this is. Like, that is clearly and obviously what this is. There's really no two ways to read it.

I think in all the hemming and hawwing and both-sides-are-bad-ing that terminally online folks do, some of us have lost track of the fact that if a white person comes by doing a "how do you do, fellow kids?" routine and tells a minority community that hrm maybe they just shouldn't vote, you know, to stick it to the man or whatever? The correct response to that is to call them a fucking fed and never let them into anything in your movement ever again.

I keep seeing people give accounts that do this second chances, and that's like giving your brand new cool protest buddy a second chance, after he suggests that you should all exchange contact info and then discuss the federal crimes you want to commit out loud, and you notice that he's secretly wearing a bullet proof vest and a wire.

[scramratz]

Least favorite form of political action is those 1 day boycotts. "Everybody don't buy anything for 1 day!" Like cool wtf is that gonna do? You do know what a boycott is, right? You do it until a change is made. Black folks in Montgomery didn't ride the bus for over a year until segregated seating was lifted. For most of them, that was the only transportation they could afford. It was difficult! That's the point! How do you expect things to change permanently if you don't permanently change! Please!