we are like STARS. something happens to BURST US open — but when we EXPLODE and think we are DYING, we, in reality, are becoming a SUPERNOVA. thus, after our journies - when we look at ourselves again - we find that we are suddenly more BEAUTIFUL than we ever were before.
—— [ adapted from c. joybell c. ]
PARK YORAE, BETTER KNOWN BY THE STAGENAME JASPER.
¼ OF THE BARRIER-BREAKING GIRL GROUP, REIGN CHECK.
A COMET FLYING FROM ENGLAND TO SEOUL.
( *he pops his finger into his mouth, prior to promptly removing it and pointing skyward, as though he were surveying the air. lips pucker thoughtfully, and even a hum comes, before he resumes a natural stance and gives what registers as a disappointed sigh. )
출처 : PUT A LETTER FROM A-Z IN MY ASK AND I’LL TELL YOU 1 THING I LOVE WHICH STARTS WITH THAT LETTER ! 지위 : ACCEPTING !
⸢ † ⸥ not even a breath of hesitation. his face alights with attentive mirth as the softest laugh flows with ease past smiling lips, a fitting predecessor to his response. ❛ hana ! my wife-to-be, my pretty kitty. of course she’s the first that comes t’ mind. ❜
출처 : SEND A 🙌 AND I’LL INTRODUCE YOU TO AN NPC RELATED TO MY MUSE ! 물음 : JAEDYN TAYLOR, MOTHER OF HIS DAUGHTER. ( DECEASED ) 지위 : NO LONGER ACCEPTING !
⸢ † ⸥ silence settles comfortably in the air, the woman tracing the rim of her glass with a delicately manicured nail, before her warm gaze would raise toward the ceiling - thoughtfully, though somewhat wistfully. ❛ we were both fashion students, ❜ she murmurs pensively, the memories flooding back to her like a stream of thought she hadn’t crossed in quite a while. ❛ i think i knew at the start it wasn’t going to be something that lasted … romantically. not because we didn’t love each other, because we did - but i wasn’t the kind of woman that could drop everything and move across the sea to be with him. and he wasn’t willing to do that for me - he was only in new york to broaden his horizons. his home base was seoul - that’s where he had built his name. i feel real silly saying that now, being that he’s at a point in his career where his name is all over the world. but i didn’t know back then. i didn’t know who he was going to be - just who he was - and still is, inside. he loved art, all kinds - we would stay up late “studying” while listening to all kinds of music. he turned me on to a lot of korean artists, that’s for certain. ❜ she chuckles lowly, sweetly, the sound a honeyed hum in her throat. jaedyn had always been exceptionally mild - especially in comparison to the spirit within the father of her child.
❛ we were friends, before we were anything else. i think i had just been so excited to meet someone like him - someone so full of passion, and experiences, stories - i fell too fast, before i even knew what i was feeling. i cared about him so much, and he cared about me … but we hadn’t planned a lot, for the future. so when i got pregnant, well … we were both scared. but excited. we had broken up by the time i told him, we hadn’t seen each other for a long while at that point. he was back in seoul, had been for a minute - i hated to tell him over the phone, but i didn’t have a lot of other options. i never knew, probably never will know, the look on his face when i told him. he was silent for a whole fifteen seconds before i asked him if he’d cut the line. he said no. didn’t ask if it was his, didn’t ask if i was sure. he only asked how far along i was, and when he could come to see me. ❜
a sigh passes, then - quiet, almost regretful. but something was so mellow about her face that it cancelled out whatever stress she felt about the past - about how poorly she had handled things. ❛ we never planned to get back together, or anything like that. i don’t really think we wanted to … but we still cared about each other. and we were going to raise our daughter together, no matter how hard it was between two countries and two hectic schedules. so that’s what we did. and it worked out fine. i wouldn’t change a thing about it … it was stressful and difficult at times, but, our daughter is happy and healthy, and that’s all i could ask for. chanel loves her father, and she’s glad to be moving to live with him in seoul while i recover. ❜
출처 : SEND A 🙌 AND I’LL INTRODUCE YOU TO AN NPC RELATED TO MY MUSE ! 물음 : KIM “KGY” GIL-YOON, MENTOR. 지위 : NO LONGER ACCEPTING !
⸢ † ⸥ ❛ i often got asked after that, if i always hired underage kids - people didn’t take kindly to the fact that our agency, who had established itself in a very seductive light, had taken in someone who wasn’t legal yet. god, we got accused of so many things - karl and i, i mean. namely, people thought we were tainting him, or “programming” him to be some kind of ultra sex symbol. but we were actually very strict with him, ❜ pausing, gil-yoon runs a hand through the whitening strands, gelled away from his forehead. ❛ we didn’t even allow him to pose shirtless until he was well past his eighteenth birthday. you should have seen the ways companies were calling him after he turned eighteen - the day of, really. they had so vehemently rejected him, threw him out on the street because he was too old to be cute and yet too young to feed into the selling of sexuality. he was distressed. we guided him through that. ❜
a quiet cluster of laughter passes through his aging throat, the former supermodel sighing as he leans on his hand - elbow propped up against the armrest of the exquisite chair upon which he is seated. ❛ i hate to take credit for his accomplishments. he really has worked so hard, and everything he has, he built. lagerfeld and i were more of his … thresholds. ❜ more laughter emerges, ebony irises bright not only with the rooms lighting, but with nostalgia - with joy. ❛ we were the doors he walked through to find opportunity. he’s a cunning little bastard, he knows that. i’m so damn proud of him. karl and i are like his parents, a lot of people say that - but really, there’s truth to that. he’s like our little baby, we’ve watched him come so far. we were raising up a lot of models at the time, and karl was training a lot of designers - but he always stood out because he pushed himself so hard. he would do anything to be successful, but to hell if he wasn’t going to do it his way. ❜
❛ i feel like an old woman, now - bragging to you about her perfect little boy who’s thirty years old now and shaking the whole globe. but it really does warm my heart to see how far he’s come. and he hasn’t aged a day - he gets that from me. yeo hunter is … something very special. he’ll never let you forget that about him, hah. i don’t like to play favourites because really, all the models that started out here at perfexion are like my kids, and i’m proud of them all - but he, and miso, are like my special babies. they’re the kids that were dropped on their head a few times but managed to do amazing things with the aneurysm it gave them. ❜ he erupts with laughter then, shaking his head to imply that he is being sportive.
DAY 5 : what’s your character’s ranking on the kinsey scale ?
i’m going to be utterly honest, here - i had no fucking idea what a kinsey scale was, so i did a little bit of research and took like three quizzes in hunter’s name. for one, i find this sort of scaling very interesting and a little unusual, but i’m not at all surprised at hunter’s results. he ranked a three on all the quizzes, which is described as “equally heterosexual and homosexual,” and i can attest to that. hunter has always been sort of genderblind when it comes to both romantic and sexual attraction - he sees a person for their character more than what gender they may or may not identify as. and being that gender is and always has been a bit of a blurred line for him, that may not be very surprising.
he has always been no-preference bisexual, as there are specific things he likes about the sexual company of either sex that he cannot place one over another. he isn’t wholly dominant or submissive, either - though his own state of dominance / submission often naturally compliments that of his partner. with women, though, he tends to be very ( probably more than you would expect, hell it’s more than i expect sometimes ) dominant. with men, though, he’s a total switch - yet somehow most of his male sexual partners have dominated him, with an exception of a select few. he could dominate anyone, theoretically, but he tends to want things to happen naturally - he’s very open and go-with-the-flow with his sexuality. plus he’s a kinky bastard that enjoys a wide array of things.
romantically, though - he is still mostly no-preference biromantic. he has a slight inclination toward women because he’s had many bad experiences with men, but at his heart, he doesn’t draw a line between the sexes when it comes to this, either. love is a strange concept for hunter, though he wants with all his heart to give it & give it & give it - he’s found himself quite a few times giving substantially more than what he’s getting, and using sex to compensate for the empty feeling it gives him. being that now he’s in a stable relationship with his longtime partner, this hasn’t been a concern of his lately - but he’s been used ( and has allowed himself to be used ) in the past, with many partners - because he has a strong need to feel loved, even if it’s temporary or elusively ingenuine.
his sexuality is quite a large part of his self expression, though. so easily could he disguise this want to give love as just part of his sex appeal or his flirty disposition instead of admitting to being as vulnerable and fragile as he really is - but at his heart, he is little more than a very soft boy who just craves constant love and attention and validation, because he’s lost or been denied so much of this in the vital developmental stages of his life.
Let me tell you a story about a boy who was too much of a smartass that he refused to wear some pants just because they didn’t go with his shirt and end up dying out of hypothermia. So, once upon a time, there lived a 5-year-old boy named Yeohun who was so stubborn he never listened to what his brother said. One day, Yeohun was thirsty so he asked his brother to get him some milk to drink. His brother, on the other hand, was this perfect ray of sunshine who bled rainbows and glittery gooey shit– a golden boy with a big big heart. Anyway, Yeohun’s a greedy little bastard. One drink wasn’t enough for him so he kept on pushing his brother to give him more milk to drink even when his brother told him to stop because he would probably pass the fuck out from all the milk he’d been drinking. But nooooo. Yeohun would yell and kick and throw fucking tantrums everywhere to the point he would break a vase or spill the milk all over the motherfucking floor. Jesus, don’t even get me started on the floor, it was like an aftermath of some wild gangbang party– white liquid…every…where. Sure, it was nothing, his brother could just clean the shit up but LITTLE SHITE BLAMED HIS BROTHER’S DOG FOR IT which was not cool because how the fuck could a dog mess up that much?? So his brother prayed to God to give him all the patience in the world to handle his lovely brother he loved so dearly who was probably the reincarnation of the prince of darkness himself, by the way. He said “God, I’ve always been a good child who doesn’t deserve none of this bullshit so why the fuck are you like this to me?” and since God’s the man and he was really kind, he gave Yeohun’s brother an ounce more of patience, the brother was able to avoid going berserk up on this kid– and also because he loved him so much though he never really admit it– fucking gross, man, feelings.Anywho, the older brother cleaned up all his mess despite the rage he kept within him. And told Yeohun to change his shorts because it was all wet and it was 12 freakin’ degrees outside. The brother went to his fresh laundry and grabbed himself a soft and comfortable sweatpants for Yeohun to wear but he was like “NOOOOO THOSE DON’T GO WITH THE SHIRT” and BAM that was when he drew the line. The brother, with a very severe broken heart, searched all around the room for a fuck to give and found none. He had enough of his brother’s antics that he left him alone in the house. Legend said Yeohun died out of hypothermia but there was also a myth circulating around the town that if you called his name three times you would hear a baby voice going “NOOOOO THOSE DON’T GO WITH THE SHIRT”
DAY 4 : how vain is your character ? do they find themselves attractive ?
if you were to walk up to yeo hunter and ask him these same exact questions ( in second person, directed toward him, of course ) he would probably burst out laughing. on the surface, he is probably one of the most vain people you would ever meet - though he is not constantly talking about how beautiful he finds himself, every now and then his very extra nature will kick in and he’ll talk about how hard it is being so beautiful because he can’t pick which selfies to upload or because he’s constantly being complimented by people he doesn’t know. obviously these are not real nor concrete complaints, but he is ever the strategist - he presents himself as comically vain for a reason. that reason ? publicity. character. and it may even help to add to his real sense of self confidence.
in reality, hunter doesn’t see himself like goddamn narcissus or anything of that nature, but he knows that he’s attractive, and he knows how to use it to get the reaction or attention he wants. he’d better know he’s easy on the eyes - if it weren’t for the many people who have told him and still tell him, than it is for the fact that he’s, you know, a supermodel. albeit, as i touched on in yesterday’s piece, beauty is entirely subjective and hunter is aware of that. he doesn’t expect every single person to fall at his knees crying that they’ve seen the light of god in his eyes, but he’s very confident in his appearance and often doesn’t concern over how he’s viewed by others.
this didn’t used to be the case, though - as a teenager hunter always thought he was pretty average looking - maybe a little too girly as he wasn’t entirely comfortable with his gender identity at that point - but at the same time, he never really did strive to appear stereotypically “masculine.” he was utterly shocked when the modeling scout that changed his life approached him the way she did - realistically, any seventeen year old ( sixteen internationally ) may be a little spooked by a person coming up to them in the middle of their dayjob telling them how stunning they are. but considering the fact that he’s thirty now, he’s had quite some time to get used to being called unreasonably attractive. and, predictably, being surrounded by people telling him that he’s stunning has done quite a bit for the way he views himself.
all in all, hunter is not vain to the point of it being concern-worthy ( in my opinion, at least - i’ll let y’all be the judge of that for yourselves, ) but he knows that he’s enough to be considered “timeless beauty” and one of the most attractive people in the world, as per his reputation and legitimate awards he’s been given. beauty is only skin deep, as we all know - and it doesn’t take very long to discover that hunter is not as perfect as any of his hunties or his public persona may proclaim. but, yes, he does know and he is in fact well aware that he has a nice face to look at, and he isn’t afraid to address that. though even then, he has some weaknesses - i.e., his bare-faced appearance.
truly, his perception of his makeup-devoid face fluctuates. sometimes he sees himself as charmingly cute without makeup, and other times he wants to burn every such photo of himself in existence. at his core, he knows that he is not ugly but he much prefers the polished look of at least his favourite foundation and a nude lip, and of course some eyeliner. he does post photos of himself without makeup and though his friends and fans are constantly assuring him that he’s just as lovely without it, he won’t be convinced. as previously touched upon, he is a strategist - namely when it comes to his appearance. theoretically, he doesn’t want anyone to be able to call him out on anything ( obviously people have their own opinions and he knows that will never always be the case, ) in regards to his physique. but at the end of the day, the saying often holds true that those who feel the need to comment on the appearances of others often have some work to do themselves.
hunter, especially after his cosmetic work ( though it hadn’t really made that much of a difference in how he saw himself at first, given the circumstances under which he was forced to get it ; his “new” nose and jawline did eventually grow on him - he came to be rather fond of them, in the end - with the decision he’d rather love himself than sulk, ) has come to be very sure and aware of all of his features - and how they coalesce upon his face and body in general. this is the task of a model, however, to know what works best and what does not to not only always look their best, but to advance in their career. this is partially why he’s come to be so successful, because of this alleged vanity - they essentially work hand in hand.