Walked Through Fire... @yettodie - Tumblr Blog

Never End

Always optimistic. And he guessed that was right. Even a fault. It was his optimistic determination that things would change that drove him. That he could change things, that he could shift them and move into the right direction. People had died because of his optimism. And that was strange because most people considered that a quality, something bright and welcoming. Yet here his was springing death. War.

He didn’t say anything. He only sat there in the still quiet of the room. He could hear running water. He could hear the world outside. He could hear and feel everything and yet still he did nothing.

What was he waiting for though? Was he waiting for her to find out? To discover that he had done it. 200 dead and there was going to be more. They had a planned out attack on another building. Free the prisoners, only they survive.

Would she be able to look at him the same? Call him the optimist and leave it at that?

When she came out he lifted his eyes to look at her. Brief. A moment. And he wanted to tell her. He wanted to know for sure what she would think of him.

“Have you picked a side yet? Do you know who’s right?”

yettodie

She came out, towel running over her hair, uncertainty sparking like gasoline through her veins. She was upset, she was angry and she was bitter. All of those people dead. She had known them, friends, close friends, acquaintances- and all of them gone. For what? for a stupid war that wasn’t going to change a single thing in the end.

That’s what wars always ended up being. She had realized that in her school days, unlearned brain taking in history and information and loads of realizations. War caused death and division. Nothing more.

There was never any peace.

But now Peter was talking like he too wanted a part of this war and she wondered if she had been too quick to label him as being too optimistic. Maybe he was something other than that. Maybe he was all licking flames and uncertain doubts. Maybe that warring look in his eyes meant that whatever she was going to say was going to be betrayed. Maybe he wasn’t the uncle she had sought for. Maybe he wasn’t the family that she needed.

But this was Peter and right now Peter was everything.

“I think it’s obvious...the only one not pulling terrorist attacks.”

#;peter #never #v; i am become death

bringthemtolight

Hayden Panettiere + Photoshoot [insp]

#fc

forwhatevercomes-blog

Cover The Grey

forwhatevercomes-blog

Feeling her eyes on him he didn’t look back. Feeling like they were attempting at preserving something. Were they? Was there anything to preserve besides themselves. For him there was. There was so much to preserve, to work on, to fix.

He took in a breath at what she said. He had thought of it. Niki had asked him that a while back. He hadn’t thought it completely in the context of leaving with Niki, for Niki. But he had thought of it. Just leaving. The way Nathan had.

Would that bring freedom? Would they end up back here or just someplace worse? Because he knew that it did get worse than this.

“It’s come and gone but I know that we can’t.”

yettodie

He sounded just like she figured he would. Speaking so much like himself that she could have slapped him right across the face. He was all kinds of honorable in so many wrong ways that she wasn’t even sure it was the right thing anymore.

Sighing her eyes lowered when he didn’t look back.

But she could imagine it now. She could see herself somewhere else, doing things that she would have liked to do. No one had ever stopped her and asked if she wanted to follow in her dad’s footsteps-

She didn’t even like this place.

“Why not?” she questioned, brows knitting together some. “Your brother did.”

#cover the grey #;peter #v; start a fire

prodigalscn

this was her attempt at conversation, wasn’t it? and it was lousy too. he felt bad for being so distant and withdrawn but had to keep up APPEARANCES. this sort of thing never happened before. one night stands weren’t particularly tasteful either. sure, there were valid excuses but he should’ve known.

standing with the sheet around his waist, he held the cigarette between his lips as he approached her, taking a bottle since she offered. and as he drank from it he kept his eyes on her even though it was almost impossible with the tilt of his head. kinda like keeping an eye on her just in case she tried something crazy.

❝ some place, huh? ❞ he took a look around then shrugged, finishing off the bottle in a single pull then working on the cigarette.

❝ if i’d’ve known, i woulda chose someplace nicer. ❞

yettodie

She wondered if she should leave. If standing here was making things so much more awkward. She wanted to tell him that he didn’t have to talk. That she would prefer to down a couple of things and find out how much it took to get her drunk.

That was always a good thing to do in situations like this.

But instead he was talking and instead all she did was look around as if surveying the area on his word. It was a pretty crap place but it was alright, she supposed.

“It’s fine.” she answered simply, finger tapping against the thin neck of her bottle. ‘Although I think...” she turned to look at him finally.

Was it really so bad?

“...I think they could’ve chosen better curtains.”

#{ idek hahahahahaha oh well it will come }#{ also this is so awkward }#;zeke

fatedxdestiny

Homecoming // The Second Coming

#fc #Peter #;it gets better

nom-food

No bake nutella cheesecake chocolate chip cookie parfaits

#likes

yettodie

Never End

forwhatevercomes-blog

He wanted to let out a laugh at what she said. But that would leave her unsure and confused. And then he would have to tell her the truth, wouldn’t he? That this time was it was his fault. This time he was really to blame.

There was some comfort in her hand on his back though. Something trying to settle within him. But he couldn’t. He knew that. He had promised her that he would never lie to her. He could not seek solace in the pressure of her head on his shoulder. What if he told her that he wanted to protect her, protect people like them, people in general. Would she believe that?

He shifted to set his arm around her shoulders. He hugged her close. Wanting this moment imprinted on his mind. A series of moments. Because he knew eventually the facade would fall. She would know what he was doing, what he had done. And the guilt was not a heroic act. It was the aftermath of the crimes he had committed.

Crimes in pursuit of the greater good. But would she be able to believe that? After all his lies would she be able to look at him and believe him? He needed her to. Wanted her to. But there was no certainty in that. She might hate him. What life be like if Claire hated him?

“Alright, alright, I think that I can do that.” he said, his voice kept low. He had to keep it steady. It was always hard lying to her. He pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “Things’ll get better.” That wasn’t a lie. It was a promise that regardless of what happened he was determined to keep.

yettodie

And she wanted to tell him that he had been telling her that since she was in high school, bound up on the idea that she was going to be homecoming queen and was going to show Jackie that she wasn’t a good for nothing after all. Until some shadowed figure came bounding into the building and ruining everything.

What would have happened had that never happened?

She would have been just a girl curing herself. She would have never known about futures and family lines and everything that was after all of them and their kind. She wouldn't be this hollowed out and gray being that felt too shallow to feel anything other than a bitterness over today. It wasn’t sadness, it wasn’t hatred. It was just bitterness and she wanted to shut it down.

Only the weak felt things so brilliantly.

“Always the optimist.” She said and she wasn’t sure if it was sarcastic or not. But she still rose up and made her way towards the bathroom. Just a quick clean up and maybe she would get some rest herself.

Things could get better if they really wanted them to. But with Pinehearst standing like a billowing beacon above everyone else it felt almost impossible. Nothing got better in war. they just ended up in tatters.

And that’s what she and Peter were- tatters.

#;peter #never end #v; i am become death #I can queue something!

forwhatevercomes-blog

Cover The Grey

forwhatevercomes-blog

He didn’t know how to answer that. Not forever. And he wanted to give her something more than what was out there now, something more than what was striving to stay alive there between the two of them. Something a little lost and damp. Near dead. He wanted to reach across and find her, tell her that he could keep a promise.

But promises weren’t his to make. Not to her at least. And he knew that he couldn’t answer it. He couldn’t respond. Couldn’t take something that he had buried deep and hand it over to her. What’s done is done. And it was better to leave things as they were.

When he felt her eyes on him he looked back at her. Holding her eyes. There was always a sadness to her face now. It had crept onto her face over time. First at the edges and then fully hitting her eyes. Making their green color look dim, like there was a crack hidden some place. And he knew he couldn’t find it and mend it no matter how badly he wanted to.

“Nothing happens.” he said, but his voice was low. Not as light as he wanted it to be. Nothing would happen because they weren’t getting caught. No one knew they were out here. No one knew about the apartment.

yettodie

She really wished that was true. nothing would happen even though they were steadily attempting to rebel against one or more things that might matter in the whole scheme of things. Peter knew that, she knew it. And all they had to do was look at Nathan to see the world they lived in.

Even family was banished if they didn’t do what was required.

Softly she sighed, tucking her hair back and leaning back on her elbows with a small escape of breath. She was tired, vividly so and she wasn’t sure if she enjoyed the knowing that this wasn’t going to be her life forever.

She had always just wanted to be normal. That wasn’t so bad, was it?

Finally she dragged her eyes back to Peter and she held him in her sights for as long as she could manage without disrupting the quiet all over again.

“Ever think of running away?”

#;peter #v; start a fire #cover the grey #I can queue something!

prodigalscn

the slightest movement almost made him turn to look at her, a l m o s t ─ and he nearly gave in. her low voice was an unwelcome disruption, killing his comfortable silence. there were expectations drawn out in the last of her words, and he knew he could not escape the inevitable. instead of moving away from the bed, he remained, in place, at the edge working on the cigarette until the filter. right the wrong ─ but how ??

❝ see for yourself. ❞ he shifted where he sat only to ensure the tangled sheet was secure around his waist. ❝ i wouldn’t know. ❞

yettodie

Maybe she had gone and said the wrong thing. Maybe she should have just slipped out of the bed and thrown on her jacket and stepped out as if all of this hadn’t happened. Why couldn’t she? It was supposed to be that way anyways?

“Right.” she whispered, moving off the bed and slipping on the dress she’d been wearing. She knelt down in front of the small fridge and peeked inside. A few stray bottles, like s he had imagined. “Want one?”

Another stupid question.

#;zeke #{ except im not sure what }#I can queue something!